The Secret (25 page)

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Authors: Kate Benson

BOOK: The Secret
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“Yes, Sir,” she whispers, biting down on her lip and fighting her natural urge to let go.

Reaching around, I let my fingertips graze over the lips of her sex, teasing her as I relish in the way they stretch and pulse for me. Running the tip of my tongue over her lobe, she shutters as I bite down gently.

“Who do you love, Baby?” I tease her, loving the warm smile that fills her face at my uncharacteristic request.

“I love you, Sir,” she answers.

“There’s my g
ood girl,” I bite down harder, skimming her clit. “Come for me.”

Nearly silent as she comes undone a
round me, she pulses like crazy and pulls every drop of me into her.

Once we’re fully dressed, I pull her back down onto my lap and savor in the last few minutes we’ll have alone until tonight. She’s curled into my lap, head resting on my chest as
I lean back. I’m putting together the last of the spreadsheet I’ll need when she breaks the silence.

“You’
ve not said much today,” she starts. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” I say, kissing her temple and giving her a small smile. “I’
ve just had my mind on work.”

“I understand,” she says, squeezing me gently and nuzzling in my chest. “I’m glad you’ve hired Sophie. Maybe with her help, you’ll be able to avoid some stress.”

“I think she’ll be a great help around here,” I agree, kissing her hair again and tightening my affectionate hold on her thigh. “I’m also glad you decided to try and let things go. I’m not sure what changed, but I think it will make things a lot easier for everyone. I know you’ve missed her.”


I have,” she admits, her voice still distance. “It was more than that, though.”

“Like what?”

“Well, I was so upset about how hard Jack’s been taking everything that I’d not considered there was more to it than I knew. Sophie and I have become so close through everything I guess I just assumed I knew the whole story,” she admits with a sigh. “Once I found out about the baby, though, I realized something.”

“What’s that?”

“I don’t think I could fathom that pain,” she says, shaking her head. “I don’t even want to imagine what it would be like to have another life growing inside you, to know that you love that life so much and have it ripped away from you? Then, to know that for whatever reason, you’re going to have to endure that alone? Jack being my brother, I don’t know that I’ll ever be okay with knowing how much this has hurt him,” she sighs. “But at the end of the day, I have no idea what I would do if I’d been in her position. That has to be the hardest thing to go through. I just…”

Her voice falters as she runs her hand over the soft silk of my tie. For a moment, she seems to have gone somewhere else in her mind.

“What Baby?”


I don’t ever want to know how that feels, so it’s wrong for me to fault someone who makes a decision based on having had to endure that. I know she loves Jack. This has been hard on her, too, and I was so focused on how it affected my brother, I lost sight of that. There’s no way I could ever endure losing our baby, Drake,” she admits, her glassy eyes meeting mine. “I don’t even want to think of it happening to us.”

Searching her features
, I gently wipe away the stray tear that escapes and kiss her lightly on the hair.

“I didn’t know children were something you wanted,” I tell her softly.

“Well, not right now,” she shrugs. “But someday it’s something I’d like to do. Wouldn’t you?”

Looking down into her grey eyes, I can’t understand how this is something we’d overlooked for so long. I can tell immediately that it isn’t a talk either of us will enjoy, either.

“Analise,” I start, hating the words but refusing the lie. “I’ve never really had an interest in having children.”

“I thought
you liked kids?” she says, surprise marring her perfect face.

“I do,” I admit. “When we see JT, I have fun with him. I think he’s great and everything, but I’ve just never had an interest in being a father.”

“Oh,” she says her voice quiet as I watch understanding creep over her. “And you don’t think you’ll ever want them?”

Pulling her close to me, I bury my face into her hair and hug her tightly.

“Baby, there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you. If having a child is something you really, really want, then I would do it,” I tell her, pulling away to touch her face. “But is that a path I’d ever choose on my own? No, I’m sorry Baby, but it’s not.”

Chapter Twenty Five

 

Chase

“I am so over puking,” Sophie groans from the office bathroom.

“Babe,” I start, concern filling my voice. “You’re not supposed to throw up with pneumonia.”

“I know, it’s the medication,” she calls back, turning on the water and brushing her teeth. “The antibiotics the doctor gave me are bullshit. I told him they made me sick and he said I had to keep taking them anyway.”

“Maybe you should call him again,” I offer.

“Maybe he should have listened to me the first time instead of being a freaking dillhole know-it-all,” she gripes, making me laugh as she shuts the water off.

“Maybe you’ll think of that next time you get drunk and want to jump in a
frozen lake,” I tease, grinning when she gives me a glimpse of her perfectly manicured finger, flipping me off from the crack in the door.

“Drake!”
I call out, not daring to open his office door after seeing Ana’s Jeep outside on my way in.

As Sophi
e makes her way out to where I’m standing, I rake my eyes over her body. She’s just changed for the meeting and I’m loving the way her black skirt is hugging her hips.

“Can you hand me my jacket, Sugar Smacks?” she says, her attention still on smoothing out the fabric of her turquoise blouse.

I turn to find it hanging over the back of her chair, smiling to myself when I hear her singing along to the radio she demanded from my cousin. As the lyrics to ‘All About That Bass” by Meghan Trainor leave her lips, she starts shaking her hips and the simple act makes my heart soar. She’s been through so much, but slowly, my girl’s coming back to me. I turn to face her with a grin until I see that she’s slipping on her stilettos.

Son of a Bitch
.

She’s reaching for her reading glasses, completely oblivious to the meltdown I’m having, when I stop her.

“Babe,” I manage, shifting uncomfortably in front of her. “What are you doing?”

“I didn’t bring my contacts with me and I’ve got to take notes,” she explains. “I’m going to have to wear my glasses.”

“Sophie, you can’t wear those.”

“What?” she says, cutting her e
merald eyes at me. “Why not?”

“You’ve already got this
whole sexy librarian thing going on,” I say, my eyes locked on her tits. “I’ve got to be able to focus in this thing.”

“So, because you have no self control, I have to be
blind
?” she scoffs.

“Baby,” I start. “You won’t be blind…”

“Yes, I will! I can’t see without them and I don’t have my contacts,” she argues, still gaping at me as she slips them on.

“Oh my God,” I groan, taking
in the finished product and rubbing my hand over my eyes. “This meeting is going to be a disaster.”

“Are you serious?”
she laughs.

“I want to bend you over this desk and fuck the shit out of you right now, Baby,” I tell her, causing her cheeks to flare with color.

“I’m flattered, but we don’t have time for that,” Drake laughs from behind me as he exits his office, Ana following closely behind him. “Get your head right.”

“Sophie?” An
a says quietly, pulling her attention away from me. “Do you want to get lunch with me after the meeting?”

“Sure,” she says, smiling through her surprise.

“Baby, she may have to take a rain check,” Drake interrupts before facing my girl. “Sophie, I may need you to go over some stuff with us for the books after the meeting.”

“Drake,” I say, looking at him like he’s nuts. “You’ve got to let her eat, dude. You can’t make her work straight through on her first day.”

“Yeah! You tell him, Baby!” she smirks, assaulting me with her coconut scent as she moves closer to me before facing him again. “You’re not the boss of me, Mitchell!”

The look of disbelief on his face is priceless, ca
using both Sophie and I to chuckle.

“Jesus,” he says, laughing as he begins to
shake his head. “What the hell was I thinking taking the two of you with me today?”

“You must’ve been thinking you want some sexy sons of bitches in the car with you,” I say, making Sophie grin when I stick my fist out for her to bump.

“Give it up, Baby,” she chuckles. “Come on, boss man. Let’s do this shit.”

“Good Lord,” he groans, kissing
a smiling Ana before following us out. “Wish me luck.”

 

Sophie

After listening as intently as one can while being visually assaulted by their
Viking like fiancé in a boardroom, I managed to get through my first meeting with Mitchell Construction.

While this was far from the first meeting I’d sat through, it’s the first I’
d attended in a long while. While Drake’s company was substantially smaller than the one I’d grown up with, it wasn’t anything to blink at. If this meeting and his lifestyle hadn’t made that clear enough, part of my new job as Drake’s secretary was getting acquainted with his accounts. Needless to say, there was a
lot
to get acquainted with.

Simply put, Ana would
never
have to worry about serving another beer as long as she was with Drake. Not that this was something that was important to her, or me for that matter, but it was nice to know she’d be very well taken care of.

“Hey,” she says quietly as she makes it to my desk less than an hour after we’d returned from the meeting. “You ready for lunch?”

“Yes,” I smile up at her from the email I’m typing. “I just need to send this and I will be all yours.”

Shootin
g a text to let Chase know I’m leaving, I grab my purse and shut my monitor off.

“Man the phones
, Boss! I’m going to lunch with Ana,” I yell towards Drake’s office door, laughing at his expression.

“Why not? I’m not busy at all,” he teases sarcastically
as he looks up from a pile of paperwork.


Sweet! I won’t rush back then,” I chuckle as I pull the door shut.

Twenty minutes later, Ana and I are seated at a small restaurant that specializes in soup and salads. Since she’s eternally dieting and I’m still a little sick, it’s perfect.

“You okay?” I ask her, noticing she’s much quieter than normal.

“Yeah, I’m just not feeling great today,” she admits with a small sigh. “I’m wondering if I don’t have that cold that’s been going around. I’m tired and just feeling kind of crummy lately.”

“I hope you didn’t catch anything from me,” I tell her as I recall my reaction when I’d learned she and Drake had gotten engaged. “Are you sure that’s all that’s bothering you?”

“I’m okay,” she says, offering me a small smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.

“You know what my favorite thing about our friendship is, Ana?” I say, obviously surprising her by the sudden change in subject. “How no matter what’s happened, no matter how mad we get at each other, we can always count on each other. I know you will always be there to listen to me without judgment no matter what it is and that it will stay between us.”

As her eyes meet mine, she gives me another small smile, this time in understanding.

“I love that about us, too, Soph,” she says, reaching for my hand and squeezing it slightly. Thinking to herself, she lets out a sigh and meets my eyes. “What would you do if there was something you really wanted and Chase didn’t?”

“Well,” I start, setting my spoon down next to my bowl and leaning back in my seat. “I guess that would depend on what it was and how badly I wanted it.
Is this a thing I can’t live without?”


You don’t know yet,” she admits slowly, sniffing a tear back. “It’s not something you realized you wanted so badly until he told you he didn’t.”


Oh,” I say, nodding. “It’s one of those things.”

“Yeah,” sh
e sighs.

“Well,” I say, taking a deep breath. “First of all, I would tell him how I felt about it. Have I done that yet?”

“Kind of,” she says, looking down at her hands. “He knows it’s something you want.”

“And he still feels the same way?”

“Pretty much,” she shrugs. “He said if it was something you really wanted, he’d do it for you, but made it pretty obvious it would only be for you.”

“And that’s not something I want
to consider?”

When she shakes her head, I see the heaving coming from her chest and I make my way around to sit next to her.

“No,” she admits, wiping a tear away. Handing her my napkin, she thanks me and pats her eyes. “I mean, if you were really selfish and content to feel guilty your whole life, you could do it.”

“But I’m not, am I?”

“I don’t think so, Soph,” she says, the napkin now a prisoner to her tears as her chest begins to heave silently.

“Do I think I may want this more than I want Chase, Ana?”

“No… I mean, you don’t know yet,” she says, sobbing openly and bringing attention to us. “You don’t think so, but you’re confused.”

“Ana,” I say, my voice straining at seeing her pain. “Honey, I’m not sure…”

“Drake doesn’t want kids,” she finally admits, shocking me but making me understand completely all at once. “And I was never in a hurry to have them, but I always kind of thought I would
someday
,” she sniffs. “Now that I know that having them is never an option, I don’t know that I’m okay with that.”

“I understand,” I say quietly, hugging her to my side.

“God, Sophie,” she says, pulling away from me quickly as guilt fills her features. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t be talking to you about this. This is so selfish of me.”

“No,” I tell her immediately. “I’m glad you came to me. You’re not selfish, you’re my best friend and you need my help.”

“But you just…”

“Doesn’t matter,” I cut her off.
“Ana, you need my advice and I’m going to give it to you, okay?”

“Thanks
,” she says quietly, squeezing me tightly.


Can you live without Drake?” I ask her bluntly. “Think about it before you answer me.”

“No,” she admits. “I don’t need to think about it. I don’t think I could ever be with anyone else.”

“Then there’s your answer,” I shrug. “If you can’t live without him, you have to accept all of him, even the parts you’re not crazy about.”

“Yeah,” she says, her eyes drying.

“Same goes for him, too, though,” I offer. “If this is something that means a lot to you, you have to tell him that, Ana. Keeping quiet isn’t fair to either of you. You deserve to have the life you want, but he can’t ever give it to you if you don’t tell him what it is.”

“I know you’re right, but,” she starts, letting out a deep sigh before facing me. “What if the life I want is so different that he decides he doesn’t want one with me at all, Sophie?”

The fear in her eyes is so great, my heart breaks for her. I know this look, because I’ve seen it staring back at me in the mirror far too many times.

“Then he doesn’t deserve
to share it with you, Ana,” I tell her. “Drake loves you, Honey. Something tells me he’ll surprise you.”

“Yeah, well, we may definitely be in for a real shocker,” she scoffs, facing me.

“Why? What do you mean?”

“I’m late, Soph.”

 

Ana

Scanning the shelves at the drugstore, I have no idea what I’m doing. I’ve never had a pregnancy scare before, so all the boxes in front of me look exactly the same.

“How late are you?” Sophie asks, pulling me from my terrified thoughts.

“Um,” I stutter as I count. “I think only a couple days? Two, maybe three days?”

“Okay,” she says, grabbing a couple different boxes
and tossing them in with her cough drops.

A
s I take in the boxes she’s holding in the basket in the crook in her elbow, I begin to panic.


Soph,” I start. “I’m sure it’s nothing and I’m completely overreacting…”


Ana, I know you’re scared, but you have to find out.”

“But what if I’ve not waited long enough? What if I buy all these tests and I get my period tomorrow?”

“Then I’ll bring you back for tampons,” she smirks, tossing another test in.

“Well, I should just wait then,” I offer, hating when she shakes her head.

“No,” she says. “If you’re pregnant, you need to know so you can get to a doctor. If you’re not, then you need to know so you can chill the fuck out, Ana.”

“Sophie,” I whine, my pulse quickening. “I’m scared!”

“Tough shit,” she says, a gentle laugh leaving her before she faces me. “If it were me, would you let me out of it?”

“No,” I huff, knowing she’s got me.

“No, you wouldn’t,” she says. “I’m going to be with you the whole time. You’ve got nothing to be afraid of. If it’s negative, nothing changes at all…”

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