Tonight and Forever (11 page)

She moistened her lips with her tongue as a tingling sensation settled in the pit of her stomach from his touch. She shook her head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

His hand brushed her cheek. Dark eyes met hers. “I happen to think it’s a great idea.”

Lorren smiled, feeling the gentle pressure of his hand on her face. She was tempted to turn her head and touch the tip of her tongue against his fingers. Instead she said, “You would be the one to think so. If my memory serves me correctly, the one and only time we went swimming together, you didn’t play fair.”

Justin laughed.
“I
didn’t play fair? Lady,
you
give a whole new meaning to the word cheat.”

“I do not.”

“Oh, yes you do.”

Lorren stuck her tongue out at him. Justin quickly captured it with his mouth, all firm with need. Lorren felt fire race down to her toes and back, settling in the core of her.

She moaned deep in her throat as she gave herself up to Justin’s touch and taste. His hand wandered up and down, caressing first her hips through the fabric of her shorts, then her bottom.

The kiss continued for a long moment until, breathless, Justin drew back. “Lorren Jacobs, you’re going to be the death of me yet.”

She gazed up at him with eyes alive with desire. “Why do you say that?”

“Because I want you so much I could die.”

“Oh, Justin.” Lorren curled into him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head upon his chest. “You really mean that, don’t you?” Disbelief, then acceptance, was in her voice.

Her words, spoken in a heartfelt whisper, tore through Justin. It was hard to believe that a woman so beautiful and desirable could harbor insecurities about herself and her ability to be wanted by a man.

“Yes, baby. I really meant it. Trust me.”

He pulled Lorren closer in his embrace until every inch of his body touched every available inch of hers. His body shook with the intensity of the emotions he felt inside. They stood that way for an endless length of time.

“Lorren,” Justin breathed, lifting her face with one of his fingers under her chin, “I told you the other night I was willing to take things slow. I meant it then, but now I want to say the hell with slowness. And unless you’re in agreement with me, I suggest you go on into the house.”

Lorren pushed away from Justin’s chest and looked up into his eyes. Without saying anything, she slowly turned and walked away. When she got halfway to the door, she turned around. Justin was leaning against the RV, with one foot crossed over the other at the ankle and folded arms across his chest. His eyes were directly on her, watching her intently.

She knew her lips were swollen and must look a sight, but nonetheless, she tilted them in a smile. “Justin?”

“Yes?”

“There’s always tomorrow.”

Justin nodded, returning her smile. He dared not hope her words were hinting at possibilities of things yet to come.

Lorren turned and hurried on inside.

Justin kept his gaze on Lorren until she’d entered the house and locked the door behind her. He took a deep, calming breath before reaching for the doorknob on the RV.

“Yeah, there’s always tomorrow,” he said softly.

L
orren couldn’t sleep.

The soft spattering rain could be heard beating gently against the window, and not too far away the sound of distant thunder rumbled across the sky. However, it wasn’t the weather keeping her awake. She couldn’t get Justin out of her mind.

Sighing, she slid out of bed and crossed the room. Turning on one of the small lamps on the dresser, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. She looked, she admitted, like the same woman who had arrived in Ennis a couple of weeks ago. But she realized something was different, something not showing that was deep within.

She had fallen in love.

Lorren had sworn after her experience with Scott, she would never fall prey to that emotion again, but somehow what she’d merely shrugged off as a physical attraction to Justin had been transformed into love. Genuine love. And with that startling clarity, she could now admit that what she’d felt for Scott was nothing compared to what she was feeling for Justin.

Straightening, she switched off the lamp and got back into bed. Lying in darkness, she gazed up at the ceiling, reflecting on her relationship with Justin. In a little more than a few days she had gained so much insight into who he was as a man, a doctor, and a person. She had dated Scott for eight months before they had married, and had never really known him or what he’d been capable of doing until it had been too late.

Her ragged sigh echoed in the quiet stillness of the room. Even though Justin had admitted he believed in love, he didn’t love her. Lorren knew she was merely someone he was spending time with while waiting patiently for that special woman he believed fate would deliver to him.

She had been hurt too deeply in the past to allow herself to assume that, although Justin enjoyed her friendship, company, and the growing passion between them, he wanted more. She was determined never to make the same mistake with him that she’d made with Scott by assuming too much.

A lone tear fell from Lorren’s eye, making its way down her cheek. Would love always be something she could touch but never hold on to?

The gentle sound of the rain soon lulled Lorren. Her lashes fluttered against her cheeks as the heaviness of sleep touched her.

The roar of thunder grew louder. Lorren awoke, startled, hearing the torrential rain pounding against the window. Lightning flashed everywhere.

Gripping the bedcovers, she battled with fear, not of the storm but the memories it seemed to evoke. Severe thunderstorms often made her remember the night her parents had gotten killed. And tonight, the memories were stronger than ever.

Drawing the covers around her, she scrunched deeper into the pillows. Howling winds beat against the windows and jagged streaks of lightning tormented the sky. Lorren covered her ears with her hands to drown out the perilous noise. She didn’t want to remember.

Justin’s words filtered through her mind.
Don’t forget I’m next door if you need anything. No matter how late it is…

Unable to confront the memories any longer, she jumped out of bed, shoved on her slippers, and grabbed her robe. Dismissing the danger, she ran from the house into the pouring rain to the one person she needed most.

She ran to Justin.

Justin groaned as he pulled the pillow over his head in an attempt to drown out the incessant knocking at his door. He was too absorbed in his dream to be distracted.

…Silken arms reached up to encircle his neck as he captured eager lips in a seductive kiss. He released her mouth momentarily to drink in the beauty of her naked brown body. Desire surged through him each time he looked at her. Caramel-colored eyes, aflame with a heated hunger; gazed back at him. He rose above her, proud and powerful, wanting to be tender, yet desperately wanting to be inside her…

The knocking became more persistent as reality invaded the deep recesses of his mind and abruptly ended his dream. Struggling to throw off the covers, he groped for his pajama bottoms and hurriedly put them on. Who in their right mind would venture out at this ungodly hour of the night and in this wretched weather? He left the bedroom and muttered an obscenity when his toe came in contact with the coffee table, Limping, he finally reached the door and yanked it open.

“Lorren!” His surprise was immediately replaced by concern. Her nightclothes were drenched, and she shook from head to toe. At first he thought the cause was the chilling rain, then he saw the terror in her eyes and face.

“What’s the matter? Baby, what’s wrong?”

Petrified caramel eyes pleaded understanding. “I—I…the storm…I don’t want to remember,” she answered incoherently. Her voice was a mere whisper before the flash of a jagged spear of lightning and the sound of a mighty roar of thunder propelled her into his arms.

Justin held her tight against him, not caring he was getting soaked in the process. Cradling her tenderly in his arms, he picked her up. After kicking the door shut, he carried her into his bedroom. Gently placing her in a huge recliner near the bed, he knelt beside her. Softly stroking wet hair from her face he said, “It’s okay. You’re here with me. You’re safe.”

Her eyes fluttered open. She gazed down at him.

“Are you all right, Lorren?”

She closed her eyes, remembering another time when she had run out into the storm at night. She nodded weakly, still trembling.

“You need to get out of these wet things, take a hot shower, and dry your hair. Do you think you can manage by yourself, or do you need my help?”

Their eyes met. Justin’s expression was one of genuine concern and caring. Lorren’s lids lowered. “I—I can manage, but…” She swallowed deeply. “I don’t have anything else to put on.”

“Don’t worry about that. I’ll find something.” He tenderly caressed her cheek. “Everything’s going to be all right.”

The touch of Justin’s finger on her skin brought a sensation of warm security. His eyes held hers with mesmerizing intensity.

“I’ll leave you alone. Everything you need should be in there,” he said, indicating the bathroom.

She nodded.

“I’ll be right outside the door if you need me.” He stood and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Lorren felt totally drained, both mentally and physically. Justin’s voice had been kind, almost loving. Sighing deeply, she stood to go into the bathroom.

In the living room, Justin paced the floor from one end to the other. After a while, he sat on the sofa, with his elbows resting on his thighs and his hands clasped loosely between his knees. He stared thoughtfully into space.

What was there about the storm that had frightened her so much to have driven her out into it? And what was it that she didn’t want to remember?

When he heard Lorren moving about in the other room, he decided to fix something hot and soothing for her to drink. She’d need it after being out in the weather.

Lorren came out of the bathroom, securely wrapped in one of Justin’s oversize bath towels. She was glad the storm had subsided. Entering the bedroom, she saw a Houston Texans T-shirt lying on the bed. Discarding the towel, she slipped into the big shirt. Her slender form was swallowed by it as it fell past her knees.

She glanced around the room. Shades of sable brown, black, and tan filled it with masculine strength and sensuality.

Above the king-size bed hung a colossal African painting depicting intricate expressions of cultural pride. Numerous pieces of artwork by various African-American artists adorned the other walls in the room. A tall bookcase stood on one side, neatly filled to capacity with books, carvings, and figurines.

Like a kid turned loose in the toy department, she padded barefoot to the bookcase for a closer look. She was impressed with Justin’s collection of Buffalo Soldier figurines honoring the elite band of black soldiers who served in the Union Army over a century ago. She could tell the figurines had been skillfully hand-painted.

Lorren knew she should go out to the living room and face Justin. But at the moment she couldn’t cope with an explanation. She wondered what he thought of her? Did he think she was a madwoman for being out in the storm? A soft knock sounded on the door, interrupting her thoughts.

“Lorren?”

“Yes, come in. I’m dressed.”

Justin entered the room. “I’ve brought you something hot to drink, love.” He handed her the cup.

Love?
Lorren tossed the word of endearment about in her mind.
Love, baby, honey, sweetheart, sugar, darling
—all were words Scott had used all the time without any particular significance. “Thanks, and I know you’re wondering why I was out in the storm…”

“We’ll talk later. Right now I want you to take a swallow of that. It’ll warm you up a bit.”

Nodding, she took a sip, then frowned.

Justin grinned sheepishly at her. “I put some whiskey in it. After being out in this weather, you need it.”

Lorren smiled back, then took another sip.

“You should try to get some sleep. I’ll be out in the living room.”

“I can’t take your bed. I’m all right now. I’ll go back to—”

“No. You’re more than welcome to stay here. The sofa will do me just fine. Try getting some rest. We’ll talk some more in the morning.” Turning, he started out of the door.

“Justin?”

He turned around. “Yes?”

“Thanks.”

He smiled. “Anytime.” He closed the door behind him.

Lorren finished the rest of her drink and placed the cup on the nightstand. She then pushed the covers back and slid into the roomy bed, settling comfortably. The clean masculine scent of Justin clung to the sheets, pillows, and bedcovers. She found safety and warmth in the manly fragrance. Shifting her head on the pillow, she was soon sound asleep.

Lying on the sofa in the darkened living room, Justin studied the closed door. “I’m glad one of us can sleep,” he muttered, shifting positions again. He tried not to think about the transparency of Lorren’s wet nightclothes when she’d first arrived, or her in his bed with his T-shirt as her only piece of clothing. Much to his dismay, the thoughts made his pulse race, and a shiver rippled through him.

His mind then voiced the questions it had earlier. What had driven her out in the storm? And what was it she didn’t want to remember? Did either have anything to do with that creep she’d been married to? Whatever was bothering her, she was enduring her own private storm.

Justin willed himself to be patient. He would get answers to his questions tomorrow. Pounding his pillow into a more comfortable shape, he turned over, hoping he’d be able to get some sleep.

In the deep recesses of her dream-ravaged sleep, Lorren struggled to free herself from her dream, crying out at the fear holding her in its grip. Thrashing about, she kicked her covers aside.

“Lorren,” a gentle masculine voice called out to her. She felt strong arms engulfing her. Slowly her heart slowed its wild race. Forcing her eyes open, she saw that Justin was with her. He was half-kneeling, half-bending at her bedside. Tightening her arms she clung to him, her body ripped by uncontrollable spasms.

Justin’s hands stroked her hair, back, and shoulders. “It’s all right, sweetheart,” he whispered softly as she became calmer. “You were having a bad dream. It’s okay. I wasn’t far away.”

Lorren tried to stop trembling. Tonight she’d had a full-blown replay of that night eighteen years ago, when her world had come to an end. “Oh, Justin,” she whispered against his throat. “I relived that night.”

He kissed the tears from her eyes. “What night?”

“The night my parents left me.” Her voice broke slightly. “It was a night very much like tonight. We were having the worst thunderstorm I’d ever seen. I was eight years old and had gone to bed. My parents had gone out for the evening and had left me in the care of a baby-sitter.”

She paused to catch her breath. “The thunder couldn’t smother the sound of the doorbell ringing later that night. I got up and saw two policemen talking to my baby-sitter. I overheard them telling her my parents had been killed in a car accident on the way home.”

She trembled at the memory. “I screamed and, before anyone could stop me, I ran out into the storm.”

Justin tenderly stroked her hair. His heart went out to the child who’d overheard such shocking news. He could just imagine her emotional turmoil. “Where did you go?”

She shrugged. “Nowhere in particular. I just kept running and running. It seemed I ran forever before one of the policemen caught up with me.”

Justin held her tighter in his arms. “But tonight, when you ran out into the storm, you went somewhere, Lorren. You came here to me.” He made a move to stand. “You should try sleeping now.”

Lorren’s hold on him tightened. “Don’t…don’t leave me, please, I don’t want to be alone. Not now.”

Justin only hesitated a moment before slipping into bed beside her, gathering her into his arms. “Go on and get some sleep. I’m here with you.”

Releasing a sigh, she let her eyes flutter closed, feeling safe in the arms of the man she loved.

Justin forced himself to remain still while he held Lorren. Perspiration formed on his forehead. He was fighting a feverish desire to make love to her. The memory of the erotic dream he’d been having moments before she’d arrived didn’t help matters.

A moan got trapped in his throat when she shifted positions in his arms, bringing a firm flat stomach and full breasts against him. His fingers itched to lift up the T-shirt and explore every part of her body, beginning with the very essence of her womanhood.

He closed his eyes, as if doing so would shut her from his mind as well as from his sight, and would bring his thoughts under control. Even though this was definitely the place for what he longed to do to her, now was certainly not the time. The last thing she needed was to be taken advantage of.

He opened his eyes seconds later. Tonight would be a long night.
A very long night.

Consciousness slowly infiltrated Lorren’s mind, and her eyes gradually opened. Justin was lying next to her, asleep. His hand was resting on the curve of her hip, and her head was cradled against his shoulder. She could feel the taut hardness of one of his legs, which was thrown over hers.