Transcending Nirvana (Dark Evoke #3) (28 page)

Kady

The picnic blanket rose and dipped like a wave in slow motion as the unevenness of the lawn bore into it. The sun on my flesh, the scent of wild flowers in the air and the distant sounds of children giggling took away the dread and guilt which was consuming me, if only for a moment.

“You’ve been playing with that daisy for ages now, darlin’.” I peeked down at the flower, the stem being rolled between my thumb and middle finger. “What’s on your mind?”

“I’m leaving. I’m going back to D.C.”

His hand shot out like a striking cobra at my wrist, interrupting my spinning flower. “Wait, what? Why?”

“They let him go. He’s free there’s nothing they can do to help, so I’m leaving.”

“I thought you said you wouldn’t run?” I was pulled up onto my feet, gazing at wild, frantic eyes filled with both questions and disbelief. “Turn a weakness into a strength, remember…”

I framed his face in my hands and breathed slowly. “With me here, who knows what could happen? I can’t risk him hurting the people I care about…”

His eyes widened while his body stiffened and a small pained gasp passed his lips.

“Walker…?” Looking down he stepped away, his white shirt stained red with blood before he fell to his knees.

“You never learn, Kady baby…” the sickening words were whispered from behind Walker’s crumpled body. The silver blade in his grasp was swayed mockingly with an upturn of his lips and a shrug of his shoulders. “Why don’t you learn?”

I jolted with a gasp, grateful that I was finally able to escape yet another nightmare. My chest heaved while the sheen of sweat coated my body. My fear was stirred more so when I looked beside me only to see Walker’s spot empty.

“Walker?” I called. “Walker?!” Still, I was answered by complete silence. It was only a dream…It was only a dream…I repeated to myself like a mantra, leaning over to retrieve my cell from the nightstand. One missed call from an unknown number, four missed calls from Laurie and one text message, which read:

Call Me

Xxx

The floorboards were cold under my feet. I called and called only to have it go straight to voicemail. After the third attempt and listening to the same robotic-like voice, I decided to leave a message.

“Hey Laurie, I just got your calls and your message. Is everything okay and is Walker with you? He’s not here and I’m…fuck, I’m freaking out here. Please, call me back.”

I tossed the handset onto the bed and ripped through the closet in search of clothing. Each plaid shirt I brushed past I would stop and grasp, inhaling deeply, reminding myself again that it was only a dream.

I settled on a pair of tight black jeans, a white camisole screened by my own black and red fitted plaid shirt. I must have checked that cellphone fifty times in five minutes. It’s crazy how when you’re expecting a call you hear the ringtone, but it’s just in your mind.

I rushed around the apartment like a madwoman, looking for any sort of ideas where he could be or what could be happening. His pickup wasn’t in its spot, his keys were missing and so was his phone.
His phone.
I brought up his number and pressed call. Once again, it went to voicemail.

“Walker, please answer the phone. Where are you? What’s going on? I’m fucking freaking out big style. Please let me know you’re okay…” I choked on a sob. “I need to know you’re okay.”

Heavy, short breaths ricocheted around the barren walls as I paced for an eternity up the length of the apartment. I swear I counted every crack on those walls more times than what there were cracks and chips.

There was nothing I could do. I didn’t have a car to go search, I was too fearful to leave the apartment to search the streets on foot, and I couldn’t get ahold of anyone. I had never felt so helpless in my life.

It was when I was exiting the bathroom that the door opened gradually, and a despondent looking Walker stepped over the threshold. I didn’t care that my steps would sound like an elephant dancing over the ceiling for the people residing in the downstairs apartment; I ran the length of that hallway and into the living room, jumping into his arms.

“Where the fuck have you been? I’ve been going out of my Goddamn mind,” I panted, frantic. When I finally peeled myself away from him, the bottoms of my clenched fists vibrated against his chest, allowing that fear to turn into anger now that I knew he was safe. “Why didn’t you answer the fucking phone?!”

That fear that I turned to anger soon turned to regret when I stepped back and was pinned by his timid expression. Red, raw flesh circled his swollen eyes. “I’ve been down the hospital with Laurie…”

“Laurie? Is she okay?”

“It’s, Da, Kady. There was…”––he stepped into the heart of the room, his hand rubbing the back of his neck––“I couldn’t sleep last night so I went out for a drive. I went to McGinty’s to apologize to him for the things I said, but…”

I reached for his arm. “Walker, what’s happened?”

“They say that it must have been a break-in. They didn’t know Da was still there, when they did, they attacked him.”

I gasped, struggling for breath as the sucker punch to the stomach winded me. “Is he…”

“He’s alive, thank God. But he’s was beat up pretty badly, he’s unconscious. I didn’t want to leave him but the nurses told me to come home and change, that there’s nothing we can do.”

Pushing up onto my toes, I wrapped my arms around him tightly, and for the first time ever, I heard him crumble. The cracks that he’d taken for God only knows how many years, finally gave away, and he sobbed into my neck.

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, darlin’,” he muttered.

“Actually…” he pulled away and frowned, urging me to continue. “I should have told you last night when I found out. They…they…”

The chiming emitted from his sweats pocket interrupted us. He lifted a finger with a familiar look on his face––the look of dread…

Walker

When I saw that unknown number flashing on my screen my stomach flipped. “Hello,” I answered.

“Mr. Walker?”

“Speaking.”

“Hi there, this is Dr. King from MA General.” My life flashed before my eyes, each memory of me and my father as I grew up, happy times and sad times. His smile and the twinkle in his eyes, the way he helped me get Kady back and the positions he got himself into…

The words, ‘he passed’ were repeating like an echo in my empty head. If I convinced myself of the worst, then anything better would be a bonus.

“What’s happened? Is my father okay?”

“He’s regained consciousness. He’s a little scared. He’s asking for you.”

My eyes closed briefly as all the tension left my body. Thank you, God… “Thank you so, so much. I’m leaving now, I’ll be there shortly.” Ending the call I smiled through my tears. “He’s awake. He’s awake…”

She tipped her head back, looking up at the ceiling. “Thank God,” she breathed, and when she, again, hooked her arms around my neck, I squeezed her so tightly that I had to remind myself that I was physically stronger and could hurt her.

It was only when I felt her shaking against me that I remembered she was about to say something. “What were you about to say?”

“Liam, they let him go. Apparently the fact that he didn’t deny what Liv had said, doesn’t give a confession.”

“So they let him walk?”

She nodded with a breathy, ‘yes’, traveling on a sigh. “Do you want me to come to the hospital with you?”

With my Da in the hospital and Liam on the streets, I needed to keep her safe. I shook my head and licked my lips as I took my phone and dialed Laurie’s number. Waiting for her to answer, I covered the microphone. “You stay here, lock the door, and don’t go anywhere until I get back, okay?”

Her nod was my answer.

“It’s no good, we’re going to need a bloody army to clear this mess up,” Laurie answered. At the hospital, we were told there was nothing we could do, so Laurie said she’d go to the pub and start tidying while I went back to explain everything to Kady.

“He’s awake,” I gushed.

I heard the broom clatter to the floor, “Thank God.”

“I’m going back down there now––”

“No, we’ll both go. I’ll pick you up now; it’ll be easier with one car anyway.”

“You sure?” I asked.

“Yeah, there’s nothing I can do here on my own anyway. Sit tight. I’ll be a few minutes.”

I told Kady once again to lock the door behind me when I left and to stay inside. I felt like shite leaving her on her own, after everything that had happened and what we knew, but I had no choice. If I wanted to keep her safe, I had to keep her inside.

We made small talk on the journey to the hospital. I told her how Liam was release and finally caved in to how guilty I felt, promising Kady something which I had no right to promise her. Justice. Is there ever any justice in the world?

Within twenty minutes we were pulling up outside the hospital. People were dodged as we ran down the corridor to the elevators, and I jabbed the button for the sixth floor.

The nurses’ station, unlike earlier on that day, was bustling. “Excuse me,” I interrupted. “I had a phone call telling me my Da’s awake.”

“And the name please?”

“Carriag Walker.”

The nurse frowned from behind her station before asking me to wait a few moments and turned to her coworker. My hand was resting on the lip of the station, and I glanced at Laurie when she rubbed the back of it with an encouraging smile.

“I’m sorry, sir, there must have been some mistake…” the nurse spoke. “You father is still unconscious.”

“What? No I had call from a Doctor Ki––”

“I have no idea what’s happened. But apart from his vitals being a little stronger, your father is in the same condition he was when he was brought in.”

“Dammit,” I hissed, slamming my hand on the counter and turning on my heel with my hands in my hair.

“This isn’t making any sense. Are you sure you had a call, Walk––”

“I’m not fucking stupid, cuz. I had a doctor call me on this damn pho––” I ripped the handset from my pocket and waved in in her face when it started chiming. The jab of my thumb stopped Kady’s name from flashing across my screen. “Kady…” the line was silent so I repeated her name.

As I listened harder, the tiles liquefied and hardened around my feet. The line was muffled, but I was just about able to hear, “Okay I’m sorry, please…just don’t hurt anybody else…”

Eyes-flared, my jaw dropped. “A distraction…” I was turning on my heel and began running down the hallway.

“Walker!”

I turned to face my cousin with a worried, frantic look. “He’s got her.”

I tore from the entrance like a bat out of Hell and headed for the car. I didn’t even need to ask, I held my hand out and caught the flying set of jingling keys in the air and slipped in behind the wheel. “Get a cab home,” I ordered.

“No chance,” she answered, slamming the passenger door closed behind her and pulling the belt across her body. “Family sticks together.”

Nodding, I pressed the button to put Kady onto speaker, and then handed it to the woman beside me.

You look after my daughter with your dying breath…
was my mantra. I promised him I would, I promised Kady everything would be okay, that Liam would have got what he deserved. That was a promise I had no right to make––a promise I couldn’t keep.

I would make damn sure I kept the promise I made to her father.

Hearing the muffled sounds over the speaker and her voice, I tore out of the parking lot…

Kady

I locked the door behind him just as he’d told me to and headed straight over to the window. Laurie’s red Honda was waiting at the sidewalk, and I watched on as Walker slipped into the passenger side before speeding off.

It didn’t feel right that I felt lighter––worry free, after everything that had happened. But at least Walker knew Liam was out, and that Carriag was finally awake. That was two positives I didn’t have an hour ago.

Rubbing my hands together, I slumped into the seat and threw my head back. I felt lighter, but still my body was a trembling wreck and all the shuddering wasn’t helping my bladder. Taking my phone, I headed to the bathroom to do my business. The pipes squealed and clattered as the water cascaded from the tap as I washed my hands.

After drying them I stepped into the hallway to come face to face the apartment door wide open. Taking steady strides to the living area, I froze as the door closed as if by itself, with the greeting of, “Hello, Kady baby,” coming from behind it.

“Liam…” I gasped.

“If you couldn’t hear that door being booted in over those pipes, then he really needs to invest in a plumber,” he smirked. As he made his way towards me, I took a further step back, eyeing the door and gauging if I had a chance of pushing him aside and make a run for it. “Don’t even think about it,” he warned as though reading my mind.

“I could call the police…”

“You could, but you won’t, not if you don’t want anyone else to get hurt that is…”

“Else?” I questioned, that sickening, derisive smirk as he held out his cellphone, curdled my blood. A photo of Carriag, unconscious in the hospital bed was displayed on the screen–– his pale, withered flesh purple and black with injuries. How anyone could do such a sickening, brutal act on and elderly person was disgusting. The thought and sight of it made me cry. “You took that?”

“Me? Oh no, how insensitive do you think I am, Kady?” he sniggered. “It’s crazy what friends in high places can and will do for you. In saying that, it’s crazy what friends in low places will do for a hundred bucks.”

“You sick bastard,” I wept and with a smile, his hand came up and struck me across the side of the face sending my flying onto the couch with the word ‘shrewd’ being overheard as I fought for breath.

“The adjective was shrewd. It got him out of the way didn’t it? He’s worried about old-man Walker; he’s not worrying about you. Now, what kind of man does that? Me on the other hand,” he held his hand to his chest, “now, I never let you out my sight.”

I was shuffling back further up the length of the couch as he prowled towards me. “Liam, please…”

“Liam, please,” he mocked with a chuckle. “We are going to take a drive. Do you understand?”

The second I nodded, his hand was wrapped around my wrist, dragging me from the sofa up to my feet. “My jacket, I need my jacket,” I muttered once he began leading me to the door.

“Now she’s finally learning. Go, I don’t want you catching a cold.”

I ripped the leather from the back of the chair and shrugged it on. When he wasn’t looking I took my phone from my back pocket and stuffed it into the pocket of the coat.

Out of the apartment and down the steps he guided me before going outside and standing next to Walker’s pickup. He swayed the keys side to side, letting them jingle before opening the door and pushing me inside. When he slipped in behind the wheel, I prayed that all the garbage the salesman fed me when I bought the cellphone was in fact true.

Blindly seeking the button on the side of the handset, I pressed it at the same time as saying, “Walker isn’t going to like you driving his truck,” putting emphasis on his name. I prayed to God this piece of technology with its voice dialing, was going to help save me.

Deranged, he let out a bellowing laugh before telling me to fix my seatbelt. I left the phone in the pocket, tearing my hands from the compartment and motioned to pull the belt across my body, before quickly reaching for the release of the door. He caught me though, and his right elbow connecting with my eye, halted my escape.

“Do I need to go all movie style and bind your hands up?” he asked with both my wrists in his hand.

“Okay I’m sorry; please…just don’t hurt anybody else…”

His eyes were deep, shining, and deranged, his sniffling increasing. I wasn’t stupid; I was wise enough to know that he was high as a kite. Liam was unpredictable and twisted at the best of times, but if he’d taken something…fuck only knows what sort of man I had just gotten in the car with. “Good girl,” he praised, his grasp on my wrists loosened and he forced the keys into the ignition, letting the truck roar to life. His hand lifted and his knuckles glided down the side of my face. I cringed. “Now she’s finally learning…”

My thoughts were erratic, going the same speed around my head as what Liam was doing in the truck: is Walker on the other end of the line? Was I ever going to see him again? Where was Liam taking me and what the Hell was he going to do with me? It felt like I had been in that seat for half an hour…in actual time it must have been ten minutes maximum. Ten minutes to figure out a way to get my location out to Walker if he
was
on the other end of the phone.

Shaking, I glanced over at Bricksdale Square. “Thank God, it looks like Laurie remembered to lock up Ent-icing this evening.” All I could do was pray that they understood.

A chuckle came from beside me. I simply smiled back, opting for nonchalance. But when his chuckle increased as his head tipped back against the rest, the fluttering of butterflies in my stomach stripped the smile from my face.

“You think I’m stupid?” he asked, pulling to a stop at the sidewalk. I was flailing my head fervently when he strained the question again. Suddenly, my head cracked the window to my right as his elbow repeatedly cracked the left side of my face. I was sure he just shattered my cheekbone. “You know she’s been with the Irish prick all day. Oh,”––he got closer to my face, holding my head still with menacing hands while his eyes widened and glimmered, his teeth chattering and sweat beaded on his brow––“Are you hiding something? Was that some kind of signal?”

“Liam, I don’t even have shoes on my feet, all I have is the coat on my back. How can I possibly signal anybody?” I cried, whilst frenzied eyes searched mine. “I know better than to underestimate you, and I never have done.”

My face was pulled closer until his lips were slanted over mine, his tongue pushing through my lips to slither into my mouth. A sob escaped me and a tear fell as I tasted the liquor on his tongue. He finally pulled back and I could breathe. “Kady, Kady, Kady…have I ever told you how happy you make me when you behave?”

We were a good few miles out of Dorchester when he leaned across my lap, causing me to flinch and tighten my legs together. “I still make you nervous, Kady baby?” he shook his head and clicked his tongue, displeased. “You know me better than anyone; you have no need to be nervous.”

“Then let me go. Please, I won’t say anything to anyone, just let me go.”

My words landed on deaf ears while he began tearing through the CD’s then focused back onto the dark road. He peeked down to each one in turn, “Nickelback…Nickelback…Nick––” he shook his head once again, but slipped one of the discs into the console before tossing the others to the side. “Doesn’t Lover-boy ever listen to anything else?”

Fear and worry gathered to form a fist in my stomach and a lump in my throat as we halted, coming to a red light. Against better judgment, I risked a peek up at the man behind the wheel. It looked alien seeing the monster there in Walker’s place. Maybe sweet talking might help…“Why have you taken me? What is this going to achieve, Liam?”

“Why have I taken you?” he threw my question back at me softly, and once again, I started when his hand lifted to my face. The once craved tender touch now had my blood turning to ice in anticipation. He smiled, a big knowing, thankful smile that churned my stomach because I knew what was coming next…“
BECAUSE YOU’RE MINE
!” he shouted the pressure behind his hand equaling the intensity and harshness of his voice. I knew it was coming and with everything I had, I prepared myself internally for it. Nevertheless, on the outside I was shaking. “I gave you clothes, money, a house,
A BUSINESS
––”

Horns blared from behind us informing us that the red light was no more. I had never been so thankful for a driver’s impatience than what I was then. With a soft snort, he reigned in the demon, patted my knee and pulled off.

My stomach churned when we took an unsuspecting hard right which lead to a side road. There were no lights just darkness––darkness and the feel of my heart lurching against my ribs, while Nickelback played continuously from the speaker.

“It’s very dark around here,” I hinted. “Maybe we should slow down a little.”

“Have I ever told you what it is like, Kady?” he pinched the tip of his nose while inhaling.

“What what is like?” With my head down low, I lifted my eyes to look in the side mirror, praying to see a set of headlights progressing in the distance behind us. Still, we were only chased by the darkness.

“To be untouchable,” he sneered when I turned to face him. I could feel the air hitting the side of my face as he lowered the window before unbuckling his seat belt and raising his arms in the air, the one hung from the window, while his foot lowered subtly on the gas. “I am untouchable. But you, Kady baby, you tried to destroy me.” I cringed and whimpered once he lowered his hands, and with one lightly grasping the wheel, the other sunk into the tissue above my knee, clamping down on the joint with a bruising strength that I was used to. “That is something I won’t allow to happen again…”

Just then, as those words were spoken, I closed my eyes and breathed deeply as I repeated my mantra,
neither will I…

Nickelback was blasting about how you remind me from the speaker, and I shrouded myself with all those memories, as I mentally transported myself to each and every moment he degraded me, the beatings, feeding off my fear. The lies, the oppression, the isolation. The begging for his brutal beatings to end, and the weakness I showed him as I gave him something he never deserved…my respect. I didn’t respect him because he earned it, I respected him because of the fear he induced, a fear I didn’t deserve to live in. A fear I refused to live in again.

Take a weakness and turn it into a strength…

Screwing my eyes shut, I breathed, “I’m sorry,” before reaching out and taking ahold of the wheel…

Walker

The wheel that my hands were gripping with deadly force was his neck when the impact of him hitting her traveled down the speaker.

“You know she’s been with the Irish prick all day. Oh, are you hiding something? Was that some signal?”

“Liam, I don’t even have shoes on my feet, all I have is the coat on my back. How can I possibly signal anybody?”

It made me sick to my stomach knowing that she risked him hurting her just to give us a location of where to go. At the same time, it also showed a power that she had regained.

“Not that I’m grateful that she did that, but what is she doing?” Laurie asked, scowling down at the handset in her lap as I pressed my foot to the floorboard.

“Turning a weakness into a strength…” I muttered.

By the time we’d reached Bricksdale Square, they were gone. Each moment that I felt like we were back at the first hurdle, she threw another hint which I grasped onto like a starving man to bread. We knew that they were in my truck, so at least we knew what kind of car to keep an eye out for, while the soft squeal of my breaks and wheels hitting gravel hinted that they made a hard turn.

I slowed for a brief moment, concentrating on the sounds on the opposite end of the speaker, frowning. “Where could that be?”

Laurie shook her head equally baffled. “I’ve lived here my entire life and I haven’t got a fucking clue. Gravel…It wouldn’t be McGinty’s…”

I could feel my heart in my stomach as I hit the wheel. “Please, darlin’, give us somethin––”

“It’s very dark around here, maybe we should slow down a little,” came from the speaker as if she had heard me.

A small gasp of recognition came from beside me, followed by, “Oh, my God…Lovers Leap…”

“What?”

“And he’s sick enough to fucking do it…”

“
LAURIE, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
?!” I shouted hysterically, my attention swaying from the road to her.

“It’s a make out point. It used to be called Lovers Lane when I was in high school; it’s a narrow road with an embankment to the side, but when you reach the top––”

“I don’t care about tourist information; just give me a fucking direction!”

Seeing her visibly shaking didn’t bode well with my gut. Nodding her head, she closed her eyes as if envisioning it in her mind. “Go straight; take a left after the old church on Fourth. There’s a small dirt road that puts you on it directly. Just be fucking careful. Too fast on a road that narrow…”––my foot pressing further onto the gas, I glanced back at her as her frantic directions slowed down to an eerie pace––“Then you’re going over…”

She wasn’t lying. The road was narrow and overlooked the abyss to our right. My adrenaline was fueled by listening to the sounds coming from Kady’s end, knowing that we couldn’t be too much further from her. I followed as quickly as I could around the bends up to hillside, pressing my foot as hard as what would be allowed.