Unsteady (The Torqued Trilogy Book 1) (39 page)

“You’re really starting to piss me off with this withholding information.”

“I don’t know that much about it. Just that he’s her soon-to-be ex-husband and he’s looking for her. He called my house phone looking for her.”

Sliding off the tailgate, I pace the gravel parking lot, trying to reel in my temper and make sense of this. I don’t want to see Lenny crying again.

“Look, I get that you’re pissed and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Lenny’s ex, but you’ve been acting strange since she started working here so tell me what’s really going on? She’s in the parts room crying.” Tyler finally asks, knowing there’s more to this. He’s been my friend for years. He knows when I’m struggling with more than just him keeping this from me.

“I fucked her.” My stare meets his as I wait for him to tell me what an idiot I am. Only he doesn’t. “Friday night in the shop. By the way, how are you feeling?”

“I’m fine.” And then Tyler’s eyes go wide. “Seriously, you fucked her?”

I nod, realizing I probably shouldn’t have said anything, but I wasn’t sure what to do. I’m in over my head.

He nods. “Okay… so now what?”

“Shit, man. I don’t even know.” I look over at Tyler who’s staring at the Chevy in front of us. “She can’t be left alone, Tyler. Ever. When she’s not here, I want you with her.”

He nods. “Okay.”

I’d do it myself but I know exactly where it’d lead. My problem is, no matter how much I try to convince myself of it, having sex with Lenny just once wasn’t enough. Twice would just be teasing. I thought if I fucked her, that I could get past the unexplainable need I felt toward her but now that I’ve been inside her, it’s going to be damn near impossible to curb this hunger. Truth is, sex with Lenny everyday still wouldn’t be enough.

A WEEK GOES by. An entire week and we’ve made it to Friday. I have no idea how either. It’s like I’ve been living in a fog of confusion. One where I’m not sure what’s more on my mind, Lenny’s ass, or her ex. It’s a toss-up.

Lenny’s in the middle of diagnosing why a check engine light is on, but one look at the car and I see she doesn’t even have the scan tool hooked up. She has the smoke tester hooked up, sure, but she forgot to close the valves.

“You’re doing it wrong,” I blurt out gruffly.

“What?” She steps back from the car and waves the smoke out of her face.

I still don’t look at her. I keep my eyes trained on the engine in front of me.

“I said, you’re doing it wrong,” I say more sternly, hoping she gets the damn hint she’s pissed me off.

“I heard that.” Her voice is just as stern, but there’s a sadness that I hate. “What am I doing wrong? Can you show me?”

I bite back my initial response, which is to just pick this fucking engine off the cherry picker and hurl it across the shop. “Everything. And no, I can’t show you.”

It’s been like this all damn week, ever since I found out about her husband. The garage is practically a warzone with me barking orders while looking over my shoulder every other minute. I keep expecting that bastard of an ex of hers to show up and start shit. It’s made the whole week a fucking nightmare.

“Everything?” I can hear the confusion and hurt in her voice and this is exactly why women don’t make good mechanics. They can’t take orders without questioning my tone of voice.

“Yes, you’re doing
everything
wrong.”

Her face contorts as if I’ve just slapped her, her eyes widening.

I point to the back of the car. “If you’re looking for a leak, you gotta hook up the scan tool to close the valves. You have to pressurize it before you can test for leaks.”

Lenny looks inside the car where the scan tool is sitting on the seat. She forgot to turn it on.

I turn around. “Like I said, you’re doing it wrong.”

The thing is, I’m doing it wrong. I shouldn’t be treating her like this. She’s obviously hurting and I’m not making this any easier on her. When I glance over my shoulder, she’s inside the car, swiping away tears and then turning the scan tool on.

Apparently, I’m living up to my reputation of an asshole.

It’s been a shit of a week. Foolishly, I’d hoped the weekend would be different. It seems I’m wrong. Tyler won’t let me out of his sight and my only option to get any free moments is to run to Raven. Honestly, the only place I want to go is Raven’s.

“Where are you going?” Tyler asks when I’m grabbing my keys off the counter Saturday morning.

“To Raven’s house.”

He stands. “I’ll drive you.”

“No.” I hold up my hand. “I’ll go right there. Promise. No stopping anywhere.”

I love Tyler, but I need Raven today. She’s the first friend I’ve ever had aside from Tyler.

That’s the only reason I can think as to
why
I show up at Raven’s house, still in my pajamas looking for ideas as to how to make Red like me again. The week was horrible and I can’t take that again. He won’t talk to me there, so maybe his sister might give me some advice. Right?

“How can I make it better?” I ask as soon as she answers the door, my tears barely controlled. At some point on the drive here, I started crying and I couldn’t stop.

“Oh, honey.” She takes me in, wraps her arms around me and pulls me inside the door. “What’s wrong?” she asks, watching me walk behind her and into the kitchen where she was eating breakfast.

It’s then I notice she’s wearing a scarf. And it’s the middle of July. “Why are you wearing a scarf?”

She shrugs and passes me a tissue. “No reason. What’s going on with you?”

“I slept with your brother.”

“Please tell me you’re not talking about Rawley…”

“Seriously?” I take the tissue and blow my nose, keeping it in my fist as I flop my hands on the table. “I’m not that desperate.”

“Who’s desperate?” Rawley asks, coming into the kitchen in just a pair of black shorts hung low on his waist and no shirt. He walks to the fridge, takes a drink of orange juice straight from the carton. “And why are you crying?”

Raven glares at him and points her spoon in his face. “None of your business. Go away.”

Smiling, he sits beside me.

“That’s not leaving,” Raven notes, kicking his chair.

He takes her bowl of cereal and drinks the milk from her bowl. “So what.” And then he looks at me. “Why are you crying?”

“I slept with Red,” I blurt out, waiting on his reaction.

“Nice.” Rawley nods and slides Raven’s bowl back to her. She pushes it aside refusing to eat any more of it. “It’s about time he got laid. Maybe now he won’t be such an asshole.”

“Nope,” I say, breaking the news to him. “I slept with him last week. He’s actually gotten worse.”

“Why are you crying then?” Rawley chuckles. “You shouldn’t be surprised one bit.”

“What are you even doing here?” Raven asks, trying to get him to leave. Rawley’s good at annoying Raven and when he knows it’s working, he’ll keep it up.

“Shush.” He waves her off. “I’m helping. Talk to me, Lenny. I’m a man.” He has the potential to be adorable right here, but I also know too much about him now to
ever
find him adorable.

Raven sits back in the chair crossing her arms over her chest. “Hardly. You’re a whore.”

He turns to her, completely straight-faced. “Shut up.”

It’s pointless to keep this a secret anymore. I can’t. I won’t go through last week again. It was awful. Anything I said, I was wrong. Anything I did, wrong. All fucking wrong. “He’s mad at me because I didn’t tell him about my soon-to-be ex-husband who was abusive, so I left him and ran here.”

“And he fucked you before he found that out?”

“Yes.”

“Shit,” Rawley curses, shaking his head in disbelief. “That’s rough. That’d piss me off too.”

Raven kicks his chair, the jolt causing his body to sway. “What? It’d piss me off. She should have told him.”

“You’re not helping her. Leave.”

His face screws up. “What?” He raises his hands. “I’m trying to. I’m being honest.
She
fucked up.”

Great. Even Rawley thinks I’m a horrible person, and he has no morals at all.

“But what do I do now?” I ask, staring at my hands and remembering that night in the shop. I want
that
again because I had never felt more safe and desired.

Rawley taps his index finger to his chin. “Let me think.” And then he looks at me. “Why didn’t you tell him?”

I sniffle and reach for another tissue. “Because at first… I moved here to start over. I didn’t want anyone to know in fear they’d think I was weak. I stayed with a man who was abusive for years because I didn’t think I deserved better. I married a man who was a monster, because I thought it was the only option. And then when I left, I realized, I had options and immediately I meet Red. Once I found out about Nevaeh, I didn’t want to bring back his past. So I didn’t say anything.”

“Your intentions were good,” Raven points out, trying to be the sympathetic friend. “You just need to explain that to him.”

“I thought I did…”

Rawley leans forward, his hands resting on the table. “I totally get why he’s mad.”

“Yes, because you have all the answers.” Raven snorts, reaching for a banana to eat since Rawley ruined her cereal. She’s very picky and if anyone so much as touches her food in any way, she won’t finish it.

He immediately takes the banana from her, peels it and takes a large bit, chewing around his words. “It’s because of what happened with Nevaeh that you should have warned him the instant you knew, well before feelings were ever involved.”

It’s my turn to snort as I relax into the chair, my tears all but dry now. “No one said there were feelings involved.”

Rawley twists his head, taking another bite from Raven’s banana and then throws the peel at her face. “We all can see there’s
feelings involved
… even for him.”

“It was just sex,” I mumble.

“Red hasn’t been with anyone since his wife died,” Rawley adds with a mocking tone, like I should have known. “He wouldn’t just sleep with someone for the sex. I’ve seen him at bars and pussy is basically thrown at the bastard, yet he’s turned down every opportunity he’s had. Until you. Fuck, Tyler even hired a hooker once and he sent the bitch home.”

“That’s true.” Raven points at Rawley, finally agreeing with something he’s said.

Leaning back in the chair, I fold my arms across my chest. “Okay, so what do I do now? I feel like the dumbest fuck in the world right now and I can’t take him being mad at me. Last week was awful.”

Rawley shrugs. “Just fuck him again. Go over to his house and blow him.”

My head jerks his direction. “Rawley, I’m serious.”

Raven waves him off, leaning forward to rest her elbows on the table, seemingly deep in thought. “Start by apologizing.”

Rawley snorts. “There needs to be more than an apology.”

“Okay, so what then?”

He thinks for a minute and then smiles. “Feed him. Make his favorite meal, then apologize. If that doesn’t work, then fuck him. It’d work for me.”

Raven smiles at her brother, and I think it’s planned by the devious twinkle to her eyes. “Is that what Sophie did to get you to forgive her?”