Virtue & Vanity (34 page)

He was right. There would be some glares and silent comments coming his way this time. The only difference was, I kind of doubted it would be humiliating or condescending. Any other girl would be unimpressed with the dinner at the McDonald’s, but I liked the thought of eating somewhere where I could relax and be myself.

The moment we entered, Sebastian immediately demonstrated how much he stood out among the rest of the clientele when he started walking towards the table, expecting to be served by one of the employees. I chuckled, realizing this was his very first time at the McDonald’s. Coming from a small place as Rosemont, where McDonald’s was practically unheard of, I could probably count the times I’d eaten there, but I wasn’t as nearly clueless as Sebastian.

“Um, don’t we need to order something first?” I asked quietly.

“Yes, of course.” Just like always, he pretended to have everything under control even though it was obvious he didn’t have a clue of what he was supposed to do in a place like McDonald’s.

It was fun to think that a man, who basically conquered the world, didn’t have the slightest ability to fit into a normal, everyday life with the rest of the people.

When we finally ordered something and took a seat, I could tell he was confused as he looked around his plate.

“There is no cutlery,” I said with a smile on my face. “You’re supposed to eat it with your hands.”

He smiled and sighed. “I should have known.”

Without another word, he took the hamburger out of the package and started eating it with his hands. To my astonishment, he was actually being a lot less of a snob than I expected him to. “This is really tasty. I could get used to it,” he praised the meal though I was sure he hated it.

While he continued struggling with his food and even managed to stain his incredibly expensive suit with some gravy, I looked towards the other tables, suppressing the need to laugh. Just as I suspected, every now and then, people would glance at our table, then whisper something to each other. I was wondering what they thought about Sebastian and the fact that he was accompanied by someone like me, when a little girl with blonde hair, carrying a red balloon approached our table. Both Sebastian and I stopped eating and gave her our full attention. Her little cheeks blushed sweetly as she looked at Sebastian, smiling. She was adorable.

“What is your name?” she asked Sebastian timidly and he gave her a gentle smile.

“My name is...” His eyes lit up and then he acted like he was startled by something. “Oops. I can’t tell you, you’re a stranger.” He winked at her and chuckled.

The little girl giggled and pointed towards me. “Is she your girlfriend?”

“No, she’s not my girlfriend.” Sebastian smirked. “She’s my wife. I’m married to her.” He stretched his hand and seemed proud to show her the ring on his finger. “See?”

She touched his hand and he looked at her tenderly as her little fingers explored the shiny ring on his finger. It felt surreal, observing him interacting sweetly with that child, taking hold of all of her attention. He would make an excellent father one day. My earlier thoughts of comparing myself to Annette returned to haunt me. He wanted a real marriage and life with me, but I had nothing to offer in return. Seeing him like that, I imagined him with our own child, and I realized he was perfect for the part. Still, I knew what I had to do to get that child and the very thought of it mortified me.

The girl took her eyes off of Sebastian’s ring and then smiled, turning towards me. “You have a ring, too?”

I looked at Sebastian who stared at me with so much warmth, and then I looked back at the little girl. “Yes, I have one too,” I whispered, smiling at her.

“Can I see?” she asked excitedly and I showed her the ring on my finger.

Even though I couldn’t see his eyes, I felt they were focused on my hand, burning an impression of that ring.

“Did you buy her that pretty ring?” The little girl kept asking a storm of questions that could only open wounds that were just starting to heal.

I glanced towards Sebastian, wondering what he would say and sadness washed over me when I saw the flicker of pain in his eyes. “No,” he answered the little girl’s question without taking his eyes off mine. “I didn’t buy her that ring, but I wish I had.”

His gaze was suddenly so intense that I couldn’t handle it anymore. Blushing, I swallowed and looked away.

“Madelyn, what did I tell you about leaving the table?” The girl’s mother came to look for her.

Madelyn pouted her lips and looked at her mother. “Mummy, you’re not supposed to say my name. They are strangers.”

Sebastian laughed, looking at that little girl, but sadness still lurked in his eyes. Madelyn’s mother pulled her closer and apologized for causing us trouble. While Sebastian courteously told her that little Madelyn wasn’t troubling us in the least, I noticed she looked at him with awe. I had often seen that look on women’s faces when they looked at him and I realized that this man could have any woman he wanted. The drive behind his consistent persistence to work on our marriage had become more unfathomable than ever before.

Not shortly after Madelyn and her mother left our table, we headed towards the car, pushed by the tension that brewed between us. The thick, heavy air caused by the commotion on the inside, was replaced by the fresh oxygen provided by the peaceful night. While walking through the park, we were again bathed in silence, only now it felt a lot more uncomfortable than the first time.

“I liked it. I think we should go there more often,” he said with an already present undertone of nostalgia in his voice.

“Yes, we should,” I agreed, unprepared to hear what he was about to say.

“That Madelyn was really something, huh?” he asked with a smile. “I would love to have a daughter like her someday,” he said in a normal voice, making small talk, but his words cut deep into my heart.

I looked at him in wonder. “I always thought you’d want a son. An heir.” There was a hidden pinch of bitterness in my voice.

The edge of his lips twitched in a light smile as he observed me. “Actually, I’m fonder of having a daughter.” He took a step closer and trained his gaze on my face. “I can imagine her already.” He smiled and took a strand of my hair between his fingers. “Beautiful curly, blonde hair,” he whispered, gazing at me like he was drowning in my eyes. “Wide, captivating chocolate eyes.” His hand slid down my face and I closed my eyes as redness settled on my cheeks. “And the most adorable pair of blushing cheeks.” He came even closer to me and his lips brushed against my ear. “I don’t mind the idea of having a female heir, sweet.” As he stepped away from me, my eyes opened in confusion and met his almost challenging stare. “I love it.”

“But... But that’s not possible,” I said with mouth wide open in surprise.

He chuckled. “Why? Because a man who’s been dead for almost one hundred years said so?!”

I nodded, looking at him with painful regret once I noticed he turned serious again.

“I don’t care about the contract and even less about his will.” He cupped my face and looked at me with sheer tenderness, leaning his forehead on mine. “This,” he swallowed and kissed my forehead, “is what I care about.” His voice was firm and decisive. “It ends with us, Isabelle. If we ever have children, I’ll make sure that they’re not forced to give up on their lives and dreams just to fulfill the wishes of a lunatic.”

Dismissing the fact that having children was something I wasn’t even remotely ready for, I thought about how much he was willing to put at stake for the sake of a marriage that still held nothing but uncertainty and it seemed unfair.

I looked at him, unable to hide my worry. “You might lose everything,” I whispered and looked away.

He pulled me back towards him and ran his fingers through my hair, captivating me under the spell of his glowing emerald eyes. “You still don’t get it, do you?” As I slowly shook my head, he leaned closer and leaned his soft lips against mine, causing a trembling sensation that spread like fire within me.
“You are my everything!”

Chapter Thirty-Eight

That night, when we came home from McDonalds, it was hard for me to fall asleep. Sebastian’s words from earlier kept returning to my mind like a sweet torture. Excitement rose in my system, the images of his caring gestures interchanging before my eyes until the late hours of the night. I remembered how he took me to the movies and bought me a whole new wardrobe to make up for throwing away my clothes Our visit to his grandfather’s estate where he shared all of his childhood stories and even made an amazing breakfast for me, warmed up my heart and a smile spread across my face when I thought about the fact that this man, whom I used to consider incapable of producing affection, even sent me flowers when he was closing a business deal in Paris. The proof of his intention to fight for our marriage was undeniably strong and this last tentative surprise made me laugh because I still couldn’t believe he’d actually taken me to McDonald’s. All of those things seemed almost too good to be true, but I didn’t care. With each passing day, we were getting closer to each other and I knew that it was only a matter of time before we started living like a real married couple. Unlike before, the thought somehow seemed a bit less frightening, and I was starting to believe that his patience and reassurance would manage to melt the iceberg of my fear away.

After a long time of tossing and turning in my bed, I fell asleep, feeling careless and happy with the way my life had been unfolding. The only thing that scared me was the threat that something might take that happiness away.

***

Heavy raindrops colliding against the window woke me up in the morning. I glanced at the grey clouds that stretched along the murky sky and I sighed in disappointment. I hated autumn and I longed for the warmth of the summer when I could spent most of my time outside, avoiding the impression that the walls of that immaculately decorated, yet cold mansion were closing down on me. After spending some time in bed, because there wasn’t much I could do on a rainy day, I finally got up to get dressed and head downstairs for breakfast. The bags on my tired eyes revealed that I hadn’t had much sleep the previous night, but I was too tired and too hungry to hide them with makeup. When I reached the ground floor, I heard flusters and I became aware that Sebastian hadn’t gone to work yet. Suddenly, for some reason, I wished I had made myself somewhat more presentable.

Almost shyly, I entered the dining room and I felt grateful that he was busy reading his newest issue of
The Guardian
, just like every other morning. I chuckled at the fact that the newspaper had been so huge that it covered up his entire face. I pulled out a chair and took a seat, convinced that he was completely unaware of my presence.

The moment I sat down, he folded his newspaper and tossed it aside. That was the first time I saw him do that and I couldn’t hide the surprise on my face fast enough. His morning routines were always the same and reading
The Guardian
seemed sacred to him. A mysterious smile appeared glued to his face and his expression was exactly the same like the day before, when he’d hugged me in the park. I could hear those words echoing in my mind again.
You are my everything.
The shiny emerald eyes were trained on mine and I cleared my throat in a useless attempt to stop myself from blushing.

My reaction to his attention seemed to have amused him, because that smile on his face soon turned into a teasing smirk.

“Good morning, sweetness. I thought you’d never come downstairs. Did you sleep well?” he asked and when I remembered that my face screamed I had everything but a good night sleep, the blushing became even worse as it spread deeper on my cheeks.

“Good morning,” I replied in a quiet voice. “I slept well, thank you,” I lied.

“Well, that makes one of us. I find it difficult to sleep lately.”

“How come?”

He shrugged. “I guess I miss a certain someone.” His voice was light, joking and he even winked at me, but I felt there was some harsh sincerity behind his remark.

I gulped, feeling a bit uneasy and I was relieved that Annette entered the room because I had no idea what to say to him.

She served our breakfast in silence and I noticed her hands trembled when she was putting food in front of Sebastian. I found it difficult to believe that after all this time she was still intimidated by him. It was almost like she had some hidden reason that made her wary of his presence. For a moment I got lost in thought, thinking how she intrusively inquired to find out things about the nature of my marriage, and the more I paid attention to it, the more I felt there were some hidden dots I should be able to connect together, but the moment she approached me and smiled with the same genuine expression like usual, I discarded my doubts and returned her warm smile.

“Here you go, Isabe…” She sighed in discomfort because she had almost called me by my name in front of Sebastian, even though he had strictly forbidden it. “I… I’m s-sorry madam,” she said in a frightened voice, and then glanced at Sebastian who was wiping his mouth to suppress his obvious need to burst out laughing.

As if she was carried by a raging tornado, she stormed from the room as fast as her legs would carry her. I remained staring at Sebastian, who chuckled and looked at me with amusement in his eyes. However, that amusement was soon replaced by a serious expression and I knew he would address her behavior.

“I see that you’ve become quite close to Antoinette,” he said softly, but his face still held that firm expression.

“What… What are you trying to say?” I was kind of taken aback by his statement.

“What I’m trying to say,
madam
,” he smiled, “is that I’m perfectly aware that she calls you by your name behind my back, so you can tell her there is no need to continue with the charade, because I’m not an idiot.” There was a flicker of detest in his voice and the fact that he disliked her remained very real.

Suddenly, I remembered how things had gone with Teresa and I became alarmed because I was still convinced that Annette wasn’t anything like that corrupted girl from before.

“Sebastian, it’s not her fault. Please…” I already started pleading with him, but the childish smirk on his face told me he didn’t take me seriously.

“Relax. I’m not going to fire your friend.” His expression turned lighter and he shook his head at me. “Why do you always expect the worst from me?” he asked in a voice that was kind of humble and I regretted my hasty conclusion.

“I’m sorry… It’s just that I have the feeling that you really don’t like her.” I looked at him apologetically and then offered a very stupid argument that did anything but support my case. “I mean… You even call her by her real name.”

He snickered and playfully shook his head at me. “How rude of me not to indulge her silly requests! Isabelle, I am her employer, not one of her girlfriends.” His voice became quieter as he started admitting what I had doubted all along. “But to be honest, you’re right. I don’t like her that much—if at all.”

“But why?” I looked at him in confusion. “She hasn’t done anything wrong.”

I looked away, feeling a bit guilty for not telling him about all the things that were going on with Annette, but I knew that he hated nosy people and if I had said as much as a word, he would surely fire her and there would be nothing I could say or do to stop him so I decided to remain quiet.

“Maybe she hasn’t done anything wrong… yet,” he said in a suspecting voice. “But there’s something off with that girl. Sometimes I wonder how she managed to get that close to you in the first place.” He looked at me with a puzzled stare.

I shrugged and offered a simple reply. “Becoming friends with her wasn’t at all difficult. It came kind of naturally,” I admitted. “We just have a lot of things in common. She likes reading the classics just as I do and she’s even studying English literature.”

Sebastian exhaled and moved his chair a bit closer to the table. “How interesting that I managed to employ somebody who just happens to share all of your interests…” He narrowed his eyes, but after a while he shrugged as a sign that he would let it go. “Well, maybe it’s just a lucky coincidence. Don’t worry, Isabelle. I’m not going to fire her out of spite.” His glowing eyes pierced through mine. “I wouldn’t do that you.”

“Thank you.” A weak smile teased my lips and I glanced towards the window, catching a glimpse of rain that was still raging outside. “It’s just that… sometimes it gets lonely in this house and it’s nice to have a friend around, or at least someone to talk to.”

He took hold of my hand and the action caught my full attention, causing me to return my gaze at him. He looked at me gently, running his thumb over the palm of my hand.

“I’m sorry. I know that it must get lonely in here,” he whispered and after a short break of silence his eyes lit up. “I have an idea. Why don’t you come to the company with me today?” he asked in a mild voice that rang with the undertone of excitement and for a while I just gaped at him, surprised by his invitation.

“That’s okay, Sebastian. You don’t have to…” I started declining politely because I couldn’t imagine that he actually wanted to take me to his company and present me as his wife to his employees. God only knows what kind of rumors were already going on there.

“I don’t have to, Isabelle. I want to.” He looked me right into the eyes and stressed the words. “Besides, aren’t you curious to see where I work?” He smiled a wide smile, sensing that I would give in to his request.

“I am but… Is it even allowed to bring your wife to your work?” I asked confused, and just as expected, I was rewarded by his infecting laughter.

“No,” he teased. “It’s not allowed to bring your wife to your work… unless you’re the boss. And the last time I checked, I still owned the company. So I think we won’t get into trouble,” he joked.

“Oh.” I gaped at him in surprise.

“Oh,” he repeated with a smile and continued convincing me to join him. “Come on. I promise it won’t be boring. I just have to get some documents in the office and make a few phone calls. After that, we could do something together. What do you say?”

“I…” I sighed and smiled in surrender. “I’d really like that,” I said softly and his light expression told me he was more than pleased with my answer.

***

It rained during the entire drive to the company, but neither the rain nor the huge traffic jam in front of us, bothered me much. A small flicker of nervousness took hold of me when I remembered that he was taking me to The Goliath, the company I knew nothing about, but he took hold of my hand and smiled reassuringly, chasing away all of my fears.
Wait for me
by
The Kings of Leon
played on the radio and I started singing along when I recognized the song because I loved that band. The lyrics were inviting, saying that things were all better now and I thought it was a good time to hear it.

“You can change the song if you want,” he said when we had to wait for the traffic light.

“I thought I wasn’t supposed to touch the radio,” I blurted out in a teasing voice, but he didn’t think it was funny and when the reality of my comment hit me, neither had I.

I revisited the memory of his threat on our wedding night when he’d yelled at me because I had dared to touch the radio. Sebastian looked at me, his expression turning from light to dark and tortured within a second. His hand caressed my cheek and he swallowed, fighting something inside him.

“Don’t say that again. You can take whatever you want because as long as it’s mine…” His stare revealed his pain. “I’ll share it all with you, Isabelle. All of it,” he whispered and kissed the palm of my hand, squeezing it between his hands.

The car behind us horned and Sebastian started driving again. We remained silent for a while and I decided to try and lighten up the mood.

“I don’t want to change the song. I love it.”

He turned to me and the edge of his lips curved in a light smile. “Me too.”

Eventually, it had stopped raining and I observed the city that was waking up together with the sun. The buildings interchanging before my eyes started getting more imposing and the people on the streets were dressed in fancy suits that screamed money and power. In awe, I stared at the endless row of skyscrapers that stretched down the whole street. They must have hosted some of the most prominent companies of the world. At some point, Sebastian made a turn towards one of the buildings and used his phone to open the garage door in front of us. I read the sign that stood above the door and I knew we had reached our destination—
The Goliath Holding.
As the door opened, he drove into an underground garage and I was struck by the endless sight of expensive cars that resembled Sebastian’s.

Gently placing his hand on the small of my back, Sebastian led me towards the nearby elevator and just when he was about to press the button to close the door, another man ran inside, panting for air and when he saw Sebastian, his eyes widened in surprise. Without a word, Sebastian pressed the button to the fourth floor and the door closed, leaving us in a very tight space that was filled with tension.

“Mr. Everett, I apologize…” The man spoke in a humble voice, but Sebastian cut him off.

“No need to apologize,” he said in a voice that was stripped of any emotion. “I’m sure there is a good reason why you’re late, but I advise you to avoid it in the future. This company has zero tolerance for people who don’t take their job seriously, but today you’ve got a lucky break.” He smirked and focused his eyes on me. The expression on his face turned a hundred shades lighter and his voice rang with affection just like moments ago in the car. “Isn’t that right, Mrs. Everett?” He tenderly tightened his grip on my back as a further display of emotion.