Wholehearted (3 page)

Sometimes the badge had unexpected perks.

He was well awake and probably would be for a while, so he decided to grab some famously delicious cafeteria coffee and maybe a newspaper. He left Lucas’s room and walked down the corridor toward the nurses’s station. There, he found a woman tapping on her cell phone.

“Excuse me,” Declan said. “I was just wondering where I could find some coffee around here.”

“Oh, you’re the cop overseeing Mr. Hale,” the nurse said.

“Yeah.”

She smiled brightly. “It’s so nice of you to stay with him. We couldn’t find any emergency contact information in his medical files. He’s alone as far as we can tell.”

Declan’s heart deflated a bit at that. He really was alone, and now Declan was more determined than ever to take care of him. He was aware of how completely insane the thought process was. He could be anybody. He could be a drug dealer who pissed off the wrong guy, or a thief who chose the wrong mark. Declan realized that once the full story came out, there was a possibility that he would be arresting him rather than taking care of him, but for some reason, in the pit of his stomach, he knew that wasn’t true. He knew this man was good and needed Declan’s protection.

“Yeah, just doing my job. So about that coffee?”

“Oh, of course. Here, come with me,” she said, rising from her seat behind the desk. He followed her down the hall into a room with a door marked “Hospital Staff Only.”

“Nurses’s lounge. The coffee is much better here. We have been known to have to admit people who drank the stuff from the caf.”

Declan laughed. It felt strange. After such a stressful day, he hadn’t realized how tense he had become. The laughter felt like the antidote. “Thanks, I’ll remember that.”

“Feel free to help yourself to ours as long as you’re here. No one will bug you about it. I’ll let the other nurses know you’re exempt from the beatings.”

Declan laughed again, this time the sound coming more easily than the last. “Thanks….”

“Kathy.”

“Nice to meet you, Kathy. I’m Declan Grant.”

“Nice to meet you too. I should head back and man the desk. I wouldn’t want to get caught in the nurses’s lounge flirting with the cute deputy.” She winked at him.

Declan smiled and poured himself a cup of coffee. The taste was bitter against his tongue, but he was glad for the warmth and the caffeine. He realized how cold he’d felt all day. Now that he was finally warm, it brought into focus how cold he’d been.

He walked out of the lounge and down the hall into Lucas’s room to take his spot in the orange chair.

He sat back, trying to find a comfortable position to keep watch for the night. He knew, logically, that he didn’t need to be there, that Lucas was in good hands and he would be fine whether or not Declan was there to watch over him. But it made him feel like he was doing something, keeping vigil at his bed as he slept.

He watched the gentle rise and fall of Lucas’s chest as he breathed, easier than he had earlier that day. Declan relaxed, knowing the oxygen was freely flowing in and out of his damaged lungs. He leaned forward again, taking Lucas’s hand in his. It made him feel anchored to him, more grounded.

He watched Lucas sleep, noticing how beautiful he was despite the swelling and bruises. Declan was grateful he was alive, and for the moment, not in any pain. He wanted to lean forward, to brush the hair from his forehead, to stroke his hand down Lucas’s cheek and feel the warmth of his skin beneath his fingertips.

He banished the thoughts from his head and concentrated on the man in front of him.

He sat that way for maybe an hour before a fluttering of eyelashes caught his attention. Declan sat up, immediately at attention, trying to discern more movement.

“Lucas,” he called gently, hoping for some sort of a response. Lucas’s eyes fluttered again. Declan stood up and ran to the door calling for Kathy.

“He’s waking up.”

Kathy stood from behind the desk and walked briskly to Lucas’s room. She checked his vitals and the printouts from the monitors. Declan was never far away as he watched anxiously for any news of Lucas’s condition.

“Lucas, sweetie, can you hear me?” she asked.

Lucas’s eyes fluttered once again before opening. His eyebrows knit together as he tried to focus his eyes.

“There you are. You gave us all a bit of a scare. Do you know where you are?”

Lucas looked confused and disoriented. He looked around the room, trying to figure out where he was. “Hospital,” he croaked.

“Good! You’re right, you’re at Coast Memorial Hospital in Ellsworth. Your throat is going to be a little sore. The medics had to intubate when they picked you up. Would you like some water?”

Lucas nodded, his blue eyes wide.

“I’ll get it,” Declan offered.

“Thanks, hon,” Kathy said.

Declan ran from the room, anxious to retrieve the water and make it back without missing too much, or before Lucas fell back to sleep. He grabbed a Styrofoam cup from the dispenser and filled it before walking back to the room, careful not to spill.

“Here,” he offered once he was back at Lucas’s bedside.

Lucas took the cup with his hand on the unbroken arm. “Thanks,” he whispered.

“Just a few little sips,” Kathy warned. “If you drink it too fast, you’ll be sick.”

Lucas nodded and took a drink.

“Better?” Kathy asked.

“Yeah,” Lucas replied.

“Can you tell me your name?”

“Lucas Hale.”

“Good. Can you tell me the date?”

“October 15
th
, 2012.”

“You’ve been here overnight, so it’s the 16
th
now, but close enough.”

Declan stepped closer, coming to stand next to Kathy. “Can you tell me what happened?”

“I’m not sure, exactly.” Lucas was quiet, staring at the back of his hand, seeming to inspect the IV.

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Kathy asked.

“I was on the boat.”

“What boat?” asked Declan.

“The lobster boat I work on.” Lucas paused for a moment before he continued speaking. “Where did you find me?”

“We got a call about a man sleeping on the dock. When I got there, I realized you had been left there, badly beaten. We’re not sure how you got there or who attacked you. We were hoping you could shed some light on what happened.”

Lucas rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Everything is all fucked up in my head. I remember being at work and then being really cold.” He paused. “I remember hearing the sirens and someone holding my hand.” He dropped his hand into his lap. “That’s it. The rest is missing.”

Kathy threw Declan a knowing look.

“Well, I can try to fill in some of the blanks and you let me know if anything comes back to you, okay?” Declan turned to Kathy. “Is that all right?”

“We can try it, but if it seems like Mr. Hale is getting too stressed, I’ll have to get you to stop.”

“Okay,” Declan agreed. The last thing he wanted to do was to agitate Lucas, but now that he was awake, Declan was up too and wanted to catch the bastards who had hurt him. “We found you badly beaten on the docks. You were barely breathing. The medics think you had a punctured lung, and what appeared to be a knife wound in your abdomen. Is that right?” Declan looked to Kathy for verification.

Kathy consulted the chart. “Yes, a deflated lung, caused by puncture from one of your ribs, three of your other ribs are fractured. Your right arm is broken in two places, your shoulder was dislocated. You had a knife wound to your abdomen that required surgery, but the surgery went flawlessly, and they were able to repair the damage to both your abdomen and your lung. You have multiple contusions on the rest of your body and they were concerned about intracranial swelling, but you should be out of the woods for that at this point. In a word, you were lucky.”

“I don’t feel very fucking lucky,” Lucas muttered.

“Well you are,” Kathy stated. “If Deputy Grant hadn’t called the medics when he did, you might not be sitting up talking to us right now. Things might have ended very differently.”

Declan shivered at the thought. “Our next step is to try to figure out who did this to you and why. Once we have that information, we can decide how to move forward.”

“I’m not pressing charges.”

“It doesn’t matter whether you’re going to press charges or not. The assault was severe. The case went from civil to criminal the second your life was in danger.”

“But I am the one that was hurt, and I said I don’t want to press fucking charges.”

“The state will press charges regardless of what you want to do.”

“Fuck that. It was me who was beat up, it should be me who decides if I want the fucking cops involved, and I don’t, so you can just get the fuck out.”

“All right,” Kathy interjected. “I think that’s probably enough for tonight. You get some rest and let your body heal. My name’s Kathy, and I’m on for the rest of the night. Kim is on in the morning, and she’s a sucker for cute boys, so you bat those long eyelashes of yours at her, and she’ll be putty in your hands. In the meantime, if you need anything, you just call for me with this button here.” She reached down beside his bed and retrieved the call button. “How are you feeling now? Are you in any pain?”

Declan’s temper was piqued, but he tried to remain calm. He paced back and forth across the room as Kathy worked her magic. He crossed and uncrossed his arms, forcing his hands to unclench at his sides. It wouldn’t do any good to get angry about this. He had worked enough domestic cases to recognize when a victim was backing down out of fear. He didn’t intend to let that happen here.

“A little,” Lucas admitted.

“On a scale of one to ten, one being no pain at all and ten being the worst pain you’ve ever felt?”

“About a six.”

“All right. We want to keep you somewhere around a four or lower if possible.” She consulted Lucas’s chart. “The doctor has okayed you for a morphine drip, so I’m going to give you a dose now, and you let me know if you’re feeling any better in a bit, all right?”

“Okay.”

“We just want you better, so you concentrate on that and let me take care of the rest.”

Kathy fiddled with his IV line and then left the room. Declan was glad she hadn’t said anything about him staying way past visitors hours.

Lucas had turned his attention from the doorway back to Declan. “You’re the cop that found me?”

“Yeah.”

“How bad was it?”

Declan tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. He wasn’t sure if he should tell him everything, or just give the general idea. He decided to be honest. “Pretty bad. When I found you, I wasn’t sure if you were even alive, and if you were alive, how much longer you would be. Kathy wasn’t kidding when she said you gave us a scare.”

“So you’re here to get my statement?” Lucas winced as he shifted in the narrow bed.

“Well, that, and to make sure you’re okay.”

“Isn’t that the doctor’s job?”

“Well… yeah,” Declan stammered. “I just thought….”

“You want to be the big fucking hero and make sure the helpless little faggot pulls through?” Lucas demanded with venom in his voice.

Declan had no idea how they had gotten here. What had he done to make this guy so angry? “What? No,” Declan said adamantly. “It’s not like that.”

“So why are you still here, then?”

“Like I said. I was the one that found you. I just wanted to make sure you were all right.”

“Well, now you’re sure. The nurse said I’m going to be fine, so you can just go.”

Declan bristled a little. He’d dealt with his share of punk kids in his short career as a cop in Austin, but Lucas’s words cut deeper than anyone else’s ever had. He’d never been as affected by another person before, good or bad.

“Officers are canvassing the area trying to track down any witnesses, but I still need to get your statement.”

“What the fuck ever, man. I told you. I don’t remember anything.”

Declan reached into his pocket and pulled out his card. He placed it on the bedside table next to Lucas. “Well if anything comes back to you, please give me a call. I’ll be back in the morning.”

“What’s the fucking point?”

“So we can arrest whoever did this to you.”

“Whatever” was Lucas’s terse reply.

Declan sighed, aware that it wouldn’t do any good to push for answers tonight. He felt a little wounded by Lucas’s reaction to him. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting: for the guy to wake up and be so grateful that he would just fall into Declan’s arms and they could live happily ever after together? Not fucking likely. Declan wasn’t so sure that’s what he wanted anyway. As beautiful as Lucas was, Declan didn’t want to open that part of himself up again.

He knew all about the consequences of coming out on the force. He was lucky that part of his record hadn’t made it to the Hope Cove precinct. Most things in life had a way of following you one way or another, and Declan counted his blessings every day that so far this didn’t seem to be one of them.

He shuddered at the memory of the day people had found out about him. It wasn’t something he ever wanted to go through again, and as much as he wanted to pull Lucas to him and hold him close, he wouldn’t, even if Lucas had let him.