500 Days (66 page)

“
Dude, quit fucking around
and let Declan in, it’s cold out,” Jasper said.

“
Jasper, good boys don’t
use such foul language,” a strange but familiar voice said. My head
shot up as I turned around slowly. My hand started to shake and
when Jaxson opened the door wide enough for all of us to see, I
dropped the plate. It bounced once, twice, before it broke.
Everything was moving in slow motion. The boys’ eyes were pinned to
the door. They didn’t even flinch when the plate crashed to the
floor.

“
Alexis, you’re even
prettier than I remember. You get more and more beautiful every
day.” I gasped, covering my mouth with my hands. I thought I was
imagining things. This had to be some kind of trick. Jacob and
Jasper were on their feet and in front of the door just as shocked
as I was.

“
Well, are you all just
going to stand there or are you going to come give your mother a
hug?” The boys rushed her, slamming into her so hard I thought they
would break her. I somehow remembered how my feet worked and took a
few steps in their direction.

“
How?” I
stuttered.

“
Does it matter?” she
said. I shook my head tears spraying everywhere. My brothers let go
long enough so I could hug her.

“
Oh, mom, I’ve missed you
so much.”

“
I know honey. I’ve missed
you too, all of you,” she said, pulling us all in for a group
hug.

“
Group hugs already? Isn’t
it a little early to be drinking?” Declan joked as she walked up
the driveway, Colton in tow. My mom turned around and Declan
stopped, causing Colton to bump into her and almost dropping her
bags. “Holy shit.”

“
Oh my goodness Declan,
look how you’ve grown.”

“
Aunt Olivia?” Declan said
her name out loud almost as if she couldn’t believe it. My mom
nodded and held her arms out for her. Declan ran to her, gripping
her in a loving hug. “How?”

“
We’ll discuss that later.
Come now, let’s head inside before you all catch a cold.” My mom
ushered us all inside. I took her hand and stuck to her side,
afraid this was just a dream, and tomorrow when I wake up she would
be gone.

“
Mom seriously, how are
you here?”

“
I will explain it later,
but now is not the time,” she patted my hand as her eyes darted to
Colton.

“
Oh, I’m so sorry. Aunt
Olivia, this is my boyfriend Colton,” Declan said, smacking herself
in the head.

“
It’s a pleasure to meet
you,” Colton replied, shaking my mom’s hand.

“
Alex, will your boyfriend
be joining us as well?”

I looked at my mom puzzled. “Mom, I don’t
have a boyfriend.” Declan squeezed my hand, a worried expression on
her face.

“
No? Then who was that
nice gentleman who came to visit me?”

“
What guy? What did he
look like?” My heart began to rabidly beat in my chest as the
realization of who it could be.

“
Dark hair, blue-gray
eyes, tattoos up and down his right arm.” My eyes widened to the
size of saucers as I turned to Colton.

“
I swear I know nothing
about it,” he said innocently.

“
What was his name?” I
asked even though I already knew the answer.

“
Casper- a very nice young
man. I could have sworn, the way he talked about you, it seemed
like you two have been together for a while and he seems to care
about you deeply. Why didn’t you ever tell me about
him?”

“
Because there was nothing
to tell,” I said, trying to keep my tone in check. “Did he say why
he was there?”

“
He said he wanted to meet
me and to deliver the good news himself.”

“
What good news?” Jasper
asked, suddenly interested in the conversation. He looked to me,
down to my stomach and then back up. I stifled an eye roll and
waited for my mom to answer.

“
Well, I think me standing
here speaks for itself,” she smiled warmly at us.

“
Why? How? I’m so
confused.” I scratched my head, getting a headache.

“
Seeing that you’re not
going to let this go, I should explain.”

“
Maybe I should go?”
Colton said, looking a little uncomfortable.

“
No dear, it’s fine. I’m
not ashamed,” my mom said, holding her head high.

“
He came to tell me I was
being released. That there was a break in the case that proved my
innocence.” My jaw dropped open. Casper never stopped trying to
look for a way to get my mom out of jail. “I was surprised to say
the least, considering who his father is.”

“
His dad was there too?”
The punches just kept coming, like a rapid fist to the
gut.

“
Yes, he came to
personally apologize, and to tell me he was doing everything in his
power to make sure I was able to spend Christmas with my
family.”

I was speechless. I couldn’t believe what I
was hearing and once again I thought I was dreaming. “Alex?” Declan
shook me gently. The only thing that brought me back was the
beeping from the oven timer. I ignored all the stares and walked
into the kitchen to take the turkey out of the oven. I ignored the
rambling as I continued to get dinner ready.

“
Alex, you need to call
him,” Jaxson said, laying a hand on my shoulder. I shrugged it off
and continued with dinner.

“
Alexis, honey. I’m sure
whatever is going on, you can work it out. Talk to me sweetie. Tell
me what’s bothering you.”

I threw a glass into the sink. “No, you
don’t show up here and pretend like nothing happened. You don’t get
the right to be a mother when you were never there.” She took a
step back as if I slapped her. I wasn’t angry at my mom, really,
but she lit the fuse for a ticking time bomb.

“
Alex, what the hell is
your problem?” Jasper growled. My mom held up a hand to tell him it
was fine
.

“
You want to know what my
problem is? I grew up without a mother and a father. The closest
thing we had to a parent was Jack and now he’s dead.” I was
gripping the edge of the sink. “Monthly visits to the prison
doesn’t count as quality time, mother.”

All her loving kindness swept out of her,
reminding me where my attitude really came from. “What was I
supposed to do? Let him kill you and Jaxson. Take away the very
thing that keeps me breathing. My entire existence for living?” She
took a step toward me.

“
Why lie? Why not tell the
truth, that it was Jack?”

“
Because I was protecting
my children.” She placed a frail hand on my check. “Alexis, there
wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t think about you, all of
you. I did what I thought was best. I knew Jack would take care of
all of you and from what I can see he exceeded my expectations. I
hate that you suffered. I hate that you had to grow up without a
mother and father. If I had the chance to go back and do it all
over again, I would do the same thing. I would do anything to keep
my babies safe from harm. To give them the opportunity they
deserve. You don’t know what’s going to happen. You can’t live your
life blaming others for the way things turned out. Things happen
for a reason Alexis, so don’t be scared or angry if they don’t turn
out the way you expected.”

“
What am I supposed to
do?” I cried, not able to let go of my anger.

“
Be brave, always be
brave.” And that’s when I lost it. I broke down and started balling
my eyes out. My mom tucked me safely in her arms and hugged me
close. “Alexis, I will never stop feeling sorry for not being there
for you when you needed me. And I will spend every day, for the
rest of my life making it up to you, all of you,” she turned to my
brothers.

“
Mom, I’m sorry, I
–”

“
Shh,” she cooed, stroking
my hair. “No need to apologize. You have every right to be
upset.”

After I finally calmed down, we all sat
around the table and had probably one of the best family dinners I
had in a very long time. I looked around the table at my family. We
finally had our mom back, but the biggest piece of our
dysfunctional family was gone. I felt the shadows begin to cast
over me again. My mom placed a hand over mine. I smiled at her but
I knew she could tell it was forced. She cocked her head to the
side, looking at me concerned. “Jack,” I mouthed. She nodded her
head understanding.

She turned her attention back to the table.
“Before we have dessert I would like you kids to do something for
me.”

“
Sure mom, whatever,”
Jasper said.

“
Get your coats,” she
said, standing up. We all looked at her confused. “I would like to
visit all of my children on Christmas.” Understanding hit me. She
wanted us to take her to Jack’s grave. Was it too soon? Could I
handle this? “Alexis,” my mom said, placing a hand on my shoulder.
“You can do this and this time you won’t be alone.” This time when
I smiled, it was for real.

We all piled into Jasper’s truck. Jacob and
Jaxson fought over who was going to sit next to mom. I sat in the
front so they both could have her and I wouldn’t have to deal with
their bickering. I dazedly stared out the window, watching all the
scenery pass by. It snowed the other day, coating the ground with a
light sprinkle of white. I caught glimpses of little kids running
in to the arms of grandparents and loved ones as they joined their
families for the holiday. A tiny prick pierced my heart as I
thought of Casper. I quickly wiped the tear from my cheek as Jasper
pulled into the cemetery gates. I took a deep breath as I braced
myself for the cold. I carefully stepped out of the truck and
waited for everyone else.

Jaxson offered me his arm so I wouldn’t slip
while we walked over to Jack’s grave. It was still hard to be here.
The wound was still too fresh. I jerked back not sure I could do
this. Jaxson’s brows wrinkled with concern. My mom stopped and
turned to face us. She let go of Jasper and Jacob and reached out
her hand for me. “We’ll do this together,” she smiled, squeezing my
hand. I let her pull me along.

We all stood silently, not sure what to do.
My mom knelt down on the ground, not caring that she was getting
her pants wet. Her pale hand reached out to touch the cold stone.
She started to shake and before I knew it I was next to her on the
ground, holding her tight. It didn’t take long for the boys to join
us.

My mom wiped her face and began to stand up
on shaking legs. Jasper caught her before she fell. “Mom, are you
okay?”

She waved him off. “Stop fussing. We should
get back before you all catch a cold.”

I nodded in agreement starting to feel the
cold from my wet legs creep up my spine.

“
Can I, just, have a
minute, first?” she asked, never taking her eyes off of Jack’s
headstone. We left her alone, walking back to the car. Jasper
shoved me back inside the truck and turned the heat on. Sometimes I
swear he thought he now had to step up in Jack’s place. No one said
anything as we waited for our mom to return. When she was done,
Jasper jumped back out to help her back to the truck.

As soon as we were back at the house, I
changed into some dry clothes while I went through Jack’s stuff to
find something clean for my mom. Unfortunately she was tiny, unlike
Jack. She had to pull the string tight on the sweats I gave her,
just so they would stay up. “Sorry, I don’t have anything else for
you. I could swing by my place and get something if you like?”

“
Alexis, it’s
fine.”

“
You don’t really have
anything, do you? I mean, do you have a plan on what you’re going
to do? Where you’re going to live? You can stay with me, but we’d
have to share a bed, unless you want to stay with a bunch of stinky
boys? Then you’ll have your own room, but…” I looked around at all
Jack’s stuff. “I guess we could clean it out. We never discussed
what we were going to do with his things,” I rambled.

She stopped me by grabbing my chin. “Alexis,
we will worry about that later. All I care about now is you and
your brothers. I want to know everything that’s going on and why a
girl as beautiful as you is still single.”

I rolled my eyes. “Because boys are stupid
and have cooties.” She laughed and how I missed that delicate
laugh. I threw my arms around her, just needing to hold her. I just
needed my mom. I felt her sigh as she rested her arms around
me.

“
Knock, knock,” Jaxson
said, instead of actually knocking. “Hey Alex, you need to share,”
he pouted.

“
Now Jaxson, there’s
plenty of me to go around,” she smiled, waving him over. Like a
little kid on Christmas morning, his eyes lit up and he ran over to
hug her. I think this was the most I’d ever hugged my brothers, but
for the first time I didn’t mind, and I had no plan to let go
anytime soon. “You are looking after your sister like I asked you?”
she asked Jaxson.

“
Of course,” he
said.

I punched his arm and he glared at me.
“Jaxson, Alexis is your other half. She’s not just your sister
she’s your twin which is why I asked you specifically to keep an
eye on her. You two have a different connection then the others. A
special bond.”

“
He’s been a good
brother,” I tell her, making Jaxson blush.

“
How about I make you guys
some hot chocolate?”