A Life Plan Without You. (68 page)

“Right now into the finances and how I can afford to treat you
like a Princess and buy you things. You’re lucky Zoë doesn’t know
about Andy’s money. My Grandfather was very wealthy he had three
daughters who he left all his money to and there was a lot to
leave. Mum’s however was left in trust for her children and was to
be split equally between more if she had more, she only had Andy
when he died and he was only months old. He did not approve of her
choice of husband. Funny old thing that. He was it seems a bloody
good judge of character my Grandfather. I think I would have liked
to know him.

Aunty doesn’t talk about him much because she gets upset.
Anyhow I’m back tracking, money and stuff and how it’s become the
bane of my bloody life... We are able to access to the interest
only on the large and stupid amount of a lump sum held in trust for
us. All income, from investments we still hold, are paid into the
interest account too, that’s enough for me never to have to work
again, that’s my black card baby, from the day we each reach
twenty. When we reach thirty, we get full control of it. We get
full access too it when we marry. Aunty Allison is executor of the
estate and is in charge. We realise the money is rightly Mum’s,
that’s why we give her what she needs to keep Dad quiet, but that
all stopped as of yesterday. All thanks to you girlie.”

“So you just want to get married, to gain the
money?”

“What? No I have enough in my access account, without the
stupid amount in that account.” Shit, my head is spinning. “Baby
your quiet, the money I would give away, if I didn’t like spending
it so much, I love seeing people’s faces when I get them things, I
get more enjoyment out of that than you know baby, it is bloody
hard work trusting people with that nugget. I do trust you Michelle
and totally, you have my trust my heart and everything I have is
yours too.” Oh, picture girl knows all about Andy’s money, not the
amount though just they have it and he has been paying her money,
he assures me he’s now stopped, I cringed, the shivers ran through
my body. I know more about his twisted brother and that girl than I
care to remember.

“Never, ever, ever say girlie to me again. I have access to
trays and know how to use them Mister.” He laughed. I was serious,
it made me sick just the thought of what his dad did to me, and
that word, girlie made me feel dirty...

“I know he was rough when he got up and went out, I don’t
think he knows his meal tickets left yet. That will be fun when he
finally realises. He had a few nasty bruises on his head though.” I
smiled his face was so full of pain before. Now the pain had gone,
and that was worth having a sore backside, just to see him smile
again.

“Don’t look now Dad’s in.” Sam got up and bought himself and
dad a drink and me a coke. I’d half a bottle of wine with dinner,
so hoped he didn’t come over as my mints were in Sam’s pocket. He
didn’t come over he just waved.

“He wanted to know why you weren’t in college.”

“He doesn’t listen when we talk to him. That is very typical
of you men, selective hearing.” He grinned.

“What didn’t quite hear that?” I drank my coke and listened as
Sam explains what had been decided at the meeting after we had
left. Emma and Jimmy were to stop at Aunty Allison’s for the time
being. Andy and he were to stop with their dad unless things get
bad and then they would re-think things. I grabbed some mints from
his jacket. As I looked up I saw his dad walking into the pub he
glares at me and I ignore him, he hasn’t spotted my father, who is
chatting to the landlord.

“Things are going to get interesting look what’s just walked
in and please stay sat down, and don’t make a fuss or even
acknowledge he’s here. Dad’s not to get wind of what he did.” He
looked over and saw his dad approach the bar. His hand was tight on
my knee and he was shaking. This I still couldn’t understand, why
he was afraid of the man stood at the bar? Given the bits and
pieces I picked from his drunken ramblings yesterday, he had been
terrorised by that hateful man all his life and it would take
longer than a Michelle chat to sort Sam out and stop him being
afraid of the hideous little man.

“Sam boy get me a drink in and you’d better make it a big one
your tart gave me a headache, so make it an extra big one.” I
smiled at my dad and waved I grabbed Sam’s shaking hand and led him
from the pub. “Where’s that bitch taking my boy? Sam get me my
fucking drinks now.” He came towards us; good old dad was behind
him. He had hold of Dennis’s arm. Dennis turned and looked to see
who had grabbed his arm, he looked very worried, and he had every
reason to be, my dad had heard the tart and the bitch comments and
was happy at neither one being said about me.

“What did you just call my daughter? I hope it wasn’t what I
thought I heard you call her. You wouldn’t be that stupid would
you, because my eldest and beloved daughter is neither a tart nor a
bitch? As to your drinks, buy your own. Now sit down or go home,
before a broken leg makes it impossible for you to do either.” I
looked at Dennis and made a pushing motion with my hands, he looked
sick. He followed us out of the pub, watched closely by dad. I held
on tightly to Sam’s hand and we walked away from him. Dennis went
towards home. Waving goodbye to dad and we went across to The Frog,
Andy was in and I thanked God he was, because Sam was so shaken up.
I made him sit down.

“Sit down Sam can I have some money please?” He passed me his
wallet. “We’ve just had a run in with your Dad. Lucky for us my dad
was there. We need to get him a drink. Can you get the drinks?” I
handed him the wallet.

“Go sit down and put that away.” I went back to sit with him,
passing him back the wallet.

“Andy’s getting them. Oh, angel he can’t hurt you any more,
stop it. Please, for me just try putting him out of your mind. Stop
at mine tonight or we can stop at your Aunts? She’s running Jimmy
in tomorrow, she can drop me off too my chefs whites all there.”
Andy brought the drinks over.

“It was just a bit of a shock him coming in there, that wasn’t
his usual watering hole he normally stays close to home or Lower
Stockton. He’s going to be in foul mood when we do go back Andy.” I
held his knee tight.

“Your both big enough to deal with him, you have my full
permission to borrow my tray.” He put his hand on top off
mine.

“Thanks, your quite calm in a crisis, aren’t you Michelle, I
can’t say I’ve ever met anyone quite like you before, you were
awesome to watch, when you tackled him Monday, were you not a
little bit intimidated by him?” I laughed.

“I’m not calm, I just run on this auto pilot thing I do, I
sort of shut down and something else in me takes over and I can’t
explain it. My friend Adam calls it my inner warrior, sometimes I
just black out completely, and that’s when I do real damage and
then I can be a bit mouthy Andy. Like I was with him.

Can you try and tell me why you are frightened of him? You’re
both bigger than him and look stronger than he is He’s a mean drunk
I’ve seen that for myself, first hand and had the smack. So I know
what he’s capable of to a stranger. What’s he done to you four over
the years, doesn’t bear thinking of he’s terrorised you for bloody
years.

He’s a narcissistic old man, who has little or no empathy for
you his family, at all. He deserves locking up and the key throwing
away. You don’t have to deal with him again, ever. You two have the
means to find somewhere safe for Emma, and keep him out of your
life for good.”

Andy threw me a dirty look, really? After all I know and he’s
worried about bloody money? Is he’s forgetting he's told Janet?
Then again, he did trust someone once and she cost him a lot of
money and caused him a lot of heartbreak. She used that information
and screwed with his brother. So did he think I would do the same,
Sam trusts me but Andy doesn’t know me? I will have to earn his
trust.

“Tomorrow we find somewhere for you to live. You need to be
with your mum, and she needs to be with you.” I sat back Sam still
holding my hand.

“You’ve got a way with words Michelle. I don’t know why we are
like we are? Yeah I suppose it’s all those years growing up, when
he did as you say, he terrorised us both mentally and physically,
he used whatever he could to get us to bend to his way of thinking
and his wants and needs always came first. I remember him starving
us for a week when Sam was little he didn’t let Mum out of the
house and he’d lock us in, he’d come back and eat his food in front
of us and if we were lucky he’d throw us scraps from his takeaway
supper. I remember that like it was yesterday.

Sam had to share Mum with me, it was what kept us going, but
she was a wreck, a neighbour heard Mum crying one day and she fed
us as soon as he went out the door. She got a message to Aunty, and
well she came around had words with him and we ate properly for
quite a long time after that, she sent a big weekly shop around he
got his booze we got food and he allowed us to eat. Big of the
little bastard. I squirrelled away the odd tin of stuff in case he
did it again and he did.

He’d do it again to get more stuff off her, but she hardened
up because Mum wouldn’t change. I could tell you tales Michelle
that would make you physically sick. So after all he’s done to us I
suppose yeah your right something just clicks and we can’t or don’t
know how to stop him, he shuts the fuck up around me and when it’s
Sam and me he’s afraid of us, but put Mum or Jimmy or both in the
room and bam he’s in control again. Narcissistic, that’s a big word
for a kid, and how do you know what means we have?”

I hated the thought of them starving and begging for food off
him. Poor Emma, those poor boys have really had it tough. Sam is
quiet I don’t think he wants me to know this stuff. He gently
strokes my thigh and lets out a sigh as Andy fills me in. Now Andy
is trying I think to make me look stupid and I’m far from
it.

“An extreme interest in your own life, and an inbuilt problem
in a part of the brain, which prevents you from caring about other
people, making you a vain and self-absorbed person, is that better
than Narcissistic Andy? I actually passed to go to the Grammar
school and the private school too, with really high test results, I
have a high IQ too, I’m far from stupid Andy I am just not world
wise, being such a Daddy’s Girl, I don’t do things other girls my
age do, I prefer talking to older people, people my age grate on my
nerves. My Gramps wanted me to go to either of the schools I passed
to go to, but I chose to go to Stockton Secondary Modern, because
my friends were all going there, sometimes I wish I did because of
those bloody Manning bitches, especially bloody Rachel Manning. Now
she made my life miserable.”

“I knew I’d seen you before, I was Rachel’s older boyfriend
all through school. I heard about you, you told her a few home
truths about her boobs being too small for that blouse, and got
your head down the flusher, you remember Rachel Sam? She and I got
engaged for a while like an hour?” Sam looked shocked.

“I knew it, I knew Karen from somewhere other than her Dad’s
works and dance class, at the bloody farce of an engagement party
were she announced to the room she was having your kid?” I was
shocked.

“Yep double rubbers paid off well. I’d had a near miss with
the other sister, Elaine, now she was a bloody good time and hated
always being in Rachel’s shadow. Those were happy days, I knew it
wasn’t mine and dumped her, her Dad threatened to kill me or have
me killed, right up until I had her checked out the day after, she
wasn’t even in the country when she fell pregnant, turns out it was
born with a really good tan. Happy days it’s a bloody small world
Michelle.” I was gob smacked at how blasé he was being.

“It is you’re right Andrew and if my memory serves me right I
owe you a slap to the head. Didn’t you slap my head hard? My first
year was spent with fucking wet hair, thanks to the fresh flush I
got daily from the slag you poked in the bathrooms. I told you Sam
I listen in toilets it seems I learnt some stuff from your randy
brother too. Didn’t you get caught in there with another one of the
Manning’s, Monica I seem to recall?

Do you remember too when you came to pick the eldest of the
five slappers up from school and ask me which plug socket I stuck
my finger into to get the curly hair and Jimmy saved me from
another head smack?” He laughed as Sam gave him a dirty look,
sheisk it was a long time ago Sam, way past time for thumping
him.

“That’s how I knew that Andrew was Jimmy’s big brother,
because Jimmy came to my rescue and told you to leave me alone?
James that day became my friend and was my friend all through
school, until I met Sam. It’s a bloody small world, if I’d have
gone to either of the other schools I wouldn’t have been rescued by
Jimmy nor in any of his classes and I wouldn’t have met Sam or I
may have but he would have been in four years above me in the
Grammar school.” Sam finally laughed and kissed me, Andy was
shocked, and as he watched Sam smiling, he did too. He told me to
carry on we had gotten distracted...

“I do well in school Andrew and listen I chose mental health
issues for my sociology course work, so I do know a little about
mental health issues, as to the money? I know it involves a lot,
but not how much, and I wouldn’t let Sam tell me either, wars are
started over money. So I would rather not know thanks, a drunken
Sam told me how you got it and why. Well a very brief history
lesson was given, but relax your money’s just that, yours Andrew.
If I need anything, I pay my own way.