Afterthoughts (9 page)

“
You’ve been such a great
friend,” she smiled warmly at him. Jay’s mouth was dry at the
thought of kissing her. It would be easy to right now as he rubbed
his thumb along her jaw line. His thought was interrupted by the
telephone ringing as Paige walked away to answer it.

“
Hey, David!” she beamed
as Jay’s heart dropped into his feet. “Did you win big at the
tables? … Yeah … no kidding? … Wow, you’d better bring back
something nice for me then … She’s fine … she’s busy getting ready
for the auction. I think that’s what is keeping her sane right now
… I’m fine …” Jay’s heart dropped again as he became afraid that
Paige was about to tell David he had stayed the night. “I slept
really well last night so I feel much better today … When will you
be back? … Great … see you then … Bye now.” Paige hung up the phone
and looked at Jay. He was staring out the picture window at the
bird feeder. She walked over and placed her hand on his
shoulder.

He automatically put his hand over
hers. “Come on, let’s go get some breakfast. Do you feel like
eating?” he asked.

“
I’m famished!” she beamed
at him.

They dressed quickly and
headed out for Pauline’s Café at the end of Paige’s street. Paige
ordered scrambled eggs, toast and bacon while Jay only ordered
oatmeal. He watched her as she devoured her meal and thought how
great it was to see her feeling better and hoped had he played a
small part in making that happen. Admiring the simple, yet alluring
features of her face and how she always wore her hair casually
about her shoulders.
“I’d bet she’d look
great in a baseball cap,”
he
mused.

He realized he needed to be here for
her but to not let himself get too close. This was a task that he
didn’t know how he was going to balance knowing he had to work with
her every day and wanting to be there for whatever, whenever she
needed him. Besides Aileen and David, she really didn’t have anyone
anymore. His heart broke for her and he felt like his head was
spinning in circles.

He looked around the cafe to try to
take his mind off of things.

The cafe was noisy and crowded. The
smell of bacon and waffles filled the room with such wonderful
fragrances that should have made him hungry. Somehow, it didn’t. He
watched an elderly couple. They looked so pleasant. The man was
cutting his wife’s ham into pieces to make it easier for her and
then helped her to use her fork to eat the pieces.

There was such love in his
eyes as he helped her. Jay was sure the wife had probably had a
stroke and was struggling to learn things all over again. He
wondered if this was a permanent situation.
“Would the old man get tired of helping her? What would
happen if he passed on before her or ended up in the same
state?”
Yet, there he was taking care of
her. The years of love they’d obviously shared made Jay really
jealous. Would he find that someday? As he glanced at Paige he
hoped she would find that as well.

“
Okay, that’s not
working,”
he thought to himself as he
looked away, noticing Paige watching him intently.

“
What’s going on in that
incredibly busy mind there?” she asked him, trying to look
cute.

He played with the corner of his
napkin. “Just watching the elderly couple over there. He is really
taking care of her isn’t he?”

“
Yeah, it’s really sweet,”
she sighed. “They give me hope. Ah well, maybe someday I’ll have
that.”

“
You don’t think you and
David will get there?” he asked hopefully.

“
I don’t know. I can’t
tell if he’s the right one. Maybe I’ll never find the right one.”
She shrugged her shoulders and sighed.

Jay’s heart skipped a beat.

“
It started out so
perfect, David and me. We seemed to have so much in common and he
seemed to be so totally in love with me.

Now …” she blushed looking at him.
“You don’t want to hear that.”

“
Sure I do. I’m your
partner as well as your friend,” Jay smiled and winked at
her.

“
Okay, you asked for it.”
She toyed with the corner of her napkin just as Jay had done. “Even
before Anthony’s death he was becoming more distant. When he was
around it felt like he was a million miles away. I didn’t know how
to handle that. I tried to figure out if I had done something wrong
or if he was just dealing with something. I even wondered if he had
changed his mind about us. After all, I wasn’t around much myself
with work and all.”

“
Don’t blame yourself,
Paige. Things happen for a reason.”

“
I know, I know. I think
the only reason he comes around now is because with all I’ve been
going through he hasn’t had the heart to tell me anything else.”
She took a drink of her coffee.

“
Then again, maybe all of
this made him realize that he wants to be around,” Jay choked on
the words, knowing that was what happened to him.

“
I don’t know. Maybe after
things settle down, he and I can have a long heart to heart and get
to the bottom of some things.”

“
That sounds like a good
idea. I don’t think Dolly and I were ever on the same page. She
always seemed to want something different,” he laughed. “I hope
pudgy Phil has better luck than I did.”

Paige had to laugh at that. She
couldn’t imagine why anyone would turn away from Jay and toward
Phil, except for the fact that Phil had a lot of money.

It was nice to sit and talk to Jay.
She felt their bond of friendship growing stronger. Paige really
needed that, realizing that he and Aileen were all she had. She was
beginning to wonder if, in the end, David was going to be there for
her at all. The thought saddened her, but it didn’t break her
heart.

Paige started feeling sorry for
herself again. Self pity was not a luxury she was going to allow
herself have. She needed to pull herself together and concentrate
on finding out what really happened to the Stecklers. To prove how
strong she was, she paid the bill for breakfast despite the
opposition from Jay. He shook his head at her but decided it was
best to let her win this battle.

After Jay dropped Paige off at her
house, she decided to write in her journal. It would be nice to
write down a few good things for a change.

“
Jay and I are becoming
closer as friends, which is something I have in short supply now.
It’s nice to know that he is here and that he cares for me. I’m not
quite sure how I feel about it though.

Only time will tell, but
it’s nice to write something positive.”

Paige sighed, closed the journal, and
hugged it. It did feel good to write something positive and what
she perceived to be sane. Hoping that she was on the way to
recovery, she put the journal on her nightstand and went to take a
bath.

Chapter 13

The man was becoming impatient. For
the first time he felt like he was losing control.

He slowly smiled again as he walked
toward the door. He turned once more to look at the room.
Confidence and pride began to swell in him as he remembered all
that he had accomplished already. He took pride in all of the pain
he caused her to make her weak. He knew that he could once again
regain complete control. It was not going to fall apart now. Not
ever.

Chapter 14

Jay tried to avoid getting too close
to Paige without letting her know.

He wanted to still be there whenever
she needed him but he would not allow himself to get too
emotionally attached. He knew over the last month he had fallen in
love with Paige yet he still didn’t know how he was going to handle
it. For now, he decided, avoidance was best. He would have to get
over it and find someone new. It was damn hard to be near her,
wanting her, and not being able to have her. He realized he was
making himself miserable whenever she would smile at him or
casually touch his arm as they worked together at the auction. He
had to keep himself from yelling at her to get her away from him
but at the same time he didn’t want her to be away from him at all.
He felt like a dog chasing his tail in a chase he’ll never win and
if he did, it would hurt badly.

Paige was feeling his
distance. Here again, she was pushing someone away from her. First
David, now Jay, and she wondered what she would do next.
“At least I still have Harry,”
she thought to herself as she dried off from her
morning shower. When she looked into the mirror, she realized she
looked healthier. Some of the color was back in her face and her
eyes did not look as dark and sunken as they had been. She smiled
at her reflection and got ready for the day.

The auction was now over and hopefully
Ian was happy with all of the proceeds. The Tree House was now over
two million dollars richer.

This meant that Paige was going back
to work.

Jay paced around his office. He was
doing this a lot more often lately but today, he was really
nervous. He’d have to face Paige on a daily basis and hoped things
would get back to normal as they would fight over cases and wear on
each other’s nerves. That would help him get over her. He pictured
her stubbornly arguing her point as if hers was the only one that
mattered. Smiling he tried to remember all of the picky little
things she used to do to aggravate him and to get his blood
boiling; things he now thought were cute.

“
God I’ve got it bad,” he
said to himself as he paced around his office, picking up his
baseball bat and rolling it in his hands. “Maybe I should knock
some sense into myself. Yeah, that’ll work.” He held the bat up
high and lowered it laughing.

Paige was nervous as well. It had been
nearly two months since she had worked full time. She knew she had
her work cut out for her in finding who murdered Anthony Steckler
and why Richie had killed himself. She didn’t care if the case was
officially closed. It wasn’t closed for Paige. She had a promise to
keep.

As she walked into the police station,
the newest rookie, Hannah, met her at the door and introduced
herself. She handed Paige a pink envelope that was delivered to the
station late last week. It was hand written with only her name. The
handwriting was extremely neat and on the back over the seal it was
marked Confidential. Paige pondered this for a moment, running her
fingers over the seal before walking into Jay’s office.

“
Hey there! Welcome back!”
Jay tried to sound cheerful and was overdoing the tone. He laid the
baseball bat back down on the desk.

“
It’s good to be back!”
she smiled. “What’s the scoop? Where’s the Steckler
files?”

Jay only smiled at her. “Under S,” he
laughed.

“
Okay, smart ass. I see
you haven’t missed a beat. You’re not planning on using that thing
are you?” she laughed and pointed at the bat. She whirled around
and walked out of the office and headed for the filing cabinet.
Speechless, Jay stood motionless as he watched her walk
away.

With shaking hands, Paige flipped
through the cabinet and pulled the file. She hugged it to her chest
and walked to her office. She laid the pink envelope aside and
opened the Steckler file. She read each page carefully, studying
for any mistake, looking for any missed lead. Nausea crept over her
as she looked at the pictures of the crime scenes so she decided to
grab a cup of coffee. She walked past Jay’s office toward the break
room. When she entered the room, she was greeted with several
“Welcome backs” and “We missed yous”. This made her feel a little
better. She worked her way to the coffee pot. As she filled the cup
with cream and sugar, she pictured Anthony, lying on the bedroom
floor, his face blue and swollen. She tried to remember everything
about the crime scene. Everything in the room looked normal. Other
than the body on the floor, there was no sign of a struggle.
Remembering the pictures of Anthony that showed all of the bruising
around his neck, she could feel her hands around his neck,
squeezing tighter and tighter until he fell to the floor. Suddenly
the coffee cup slipped from her hand and shattered on the break
room floor. Paige grabbed the counter top and tried to steady
herself.

“
Here, I’ll get that!”
Jay, who had walked in behind Paige, started cleaning up the mess.
Paige stood there shaking. “You okay?” he asked as he looked up at
her while wiping up the coffee.

“
Yeah, just need that
first cup of Joe,” she tried to smile but Jay could see through her
facade and knew something was wrong.

“
You go sit. I’ll clean
this up and bring ya a fresh cup with tons of cream and sugar,” he
added with a wink. Paige didn’t argue and walked back to her
office, still shaking and trying to figure out what she had just
seen.

As she sat at the desk,
she saw the envelope. She took a deep breath, slid her finger under
the seal and opened the letter. Inside was a single piece of rose
colored paper that opened to reveal the same neat
handwriting.
“Whoever wrote this, really
took their time,”
she thought to herself
as she began to read.