Afterthoughts (4 page)

She smiled again as she
headed back to the kitchen door to let Harry in. After locking the
door, she walked to the bathroom, slipped off her robe and gown and
lowered herself into the hot water until only her face was visible
through the bubbles. She let the warmth of the water surround her
and soothe her. She tried not to think of the day before but the
vision of Richie hanging from the rafters kept creeping back into
her thoughts.
“Be calm Paige. Don’t think
about it. Everything is fine. Forget it,”
she kept hearing a voice say over and over. She sipped her
coffee as she soaked in the warm tub, trying to let the sensations
relax her mind.

Suddenly, she fought off the urge to
forget it. She tried to think of Sarah and what she needed to do to
help her. She had to figure out what was going on with Richie; why
he did what he did to himself? Tears poured down her cheeks as she
realized she still had no answers.

She remembered how Sarah had been
there for her in the past. Sarah hadn’t done anything special other
than listening when Paige needed to talk, or to giving her the
space she needed when she didn’t want to.

She smiled as she tried to remember
the fun the two of them had getting to know each other growing up.
She remembered when they skipped school shopped in the malls all
day. They came home later with the beer they managed to convince a
local store owner to sell them. How stupid they must have looked
snickering as they walked up and down the halls of their childhood
home, trying not to look drunk. As she smiled to herself, she fell
sound asleep.

A half hour later, she woke shivering.
Most of the water had drained out of the tub leaving her cold and
damp. After considering running more hot water, she decided to get
out instead. Before she could dry off there was a frantic knock on
the door and she could hear her boyfriend, David, scream, “Paige,
you alright?”

“
I’m fine … I’m coming,”
she yelled trying to outdo Harry’s barks. She threw on her robe and
ran for the door.

When the door opened, David pulled her
into his arms. “When I couldn’t reach you, I got really worried. I
had to come and check on you,” he kissed her wet hair.

“
I’m sorry. I just needed
some time,” Paige said as she automatically slid into his arms. She
had to admit, it felt good to be held.

Harry must have felt the same way as
he jumped up on them and tried to squeeze his way into the
middle.

“
I understand, baby,”
David whispered in her ear. He loosened his grip on her so he could
pet the dog. “Come here you big goof!” He wrestled him around for a
bit before grabbing Paige’s hand and leading her into the living
room to sit on the couch. “How are you holding up?”

Paige raised her head to look at him.
“I’m okay. It’s Sarah I’m worried about. She’s lost both Anthony
and Richie in less than a week, then to deal with the possibility
that Richie murdered his own father. I just can’t even begin to
imagine!” Beyond her control, the tears finally fell down her
cheeks. “I need to go put on some clothes. I’ll be right back.”
Paige walked quickly from the room leaving David to sit on the
couch. Harry nudged his hand and David rubbed his ears
softly.

“
She’s not doing very
well,” he whispered to Harry as he scratched behind one of his
ears. “We’re going to have to keep an eye on her.”

She returned wearing a pink sweat
suit. David picked up the conversation that Paige had hoped to
avoid just a little bit longer.

“
You’ve been dealing with
it too, Paige. You were the one that put the pieces together
leading to Richie murdering his father. Killing himself only proves
his guilt.” David hugged her again allowing Paige’s tears to soak
his shoulder. He then took a tissue from a box on the coffee table
and handed it to her.

“
I still don’t think
Richie killed Anthony,” she paused. “How do you go on after
something like this? I’m not sure I could!” She pulled back and
looked at him. His dark blonde hair looked as if he had just jumped
out of the bed. “I’m glad you’re here. I thought I wanted to be
alone. I was wrong.” She tried to smile at him but ended up burying
her face in the tissue.

“
Where else in the world
would I be?” He smiled at her, kissed her on the forehead, and
touched her cheek. “You’ve faced your fair share and look at you
now. Have you eaten?” He took her hand in his and caressed her
fingers.

“
No. I had a cup coffee
but it’s cold now. There’s more in the pot. Do you want some?” She
started for the kitchen.

He pulled her back toward the sofa.
“You just sit here and try to relax. I’ll take care of the coffee.
Breakfast too.” He held both of her hands briefly before he turned
and walked to the kitchen.

Paige wanted to resist, but gave up.
She leaned back in the sofa, grabbed her throw pillow, and hugged
it tightly. She pulled her feet up under her and stared out of the
living room window at the trees in her front yard.

David watched her from the
door and noticed how her long brown hair fell over her shoulder and
across the pillow she had pulled up in front of
her
. “She is beautiful. Even after all
she’s been through, she is still beautiful,”
he thought to himself as he turned slowly and headed toward
the kitchen.

She watched the blue jays
playfully darting in and out of the branches and landing on her
bird feeder. She couldn’t remember the last time she put seeds in
the damn thing. “
The poor things would
starve if they had to depend on me,”
she
thought to herself. The birds swept down over a small squirrel that
was scratching around under the feeder causing the squirrel to run
into the row of shrubs along the yard. “
If
the squirrel would only figure out that he’s
bigger
,” she chuckled to
herself.

She could hear David
banging around in the kitchen and wondered what he could be finding
for breakfast. “
Hmmm, groceries, that’s
another thing I can’t remember the last time I
did
.” Paige barely even had time to spend
with David, yet here he was, making breakfast and worrying about
her. “
I’ve got to spend more time doing
things for me,
” she promised herself that
this would also include time for David and Sarah. The tears began
to flow again and she buried her face in the pillow.
“
When will I ever run out of
tears?”

A few minutes later, David walked in
carrying a tray with oatmeal, toast, and coffee. “I’m sorry. This
was all I could find, and it’s instant oatmeal at that,” he smiled
as he sat the tray on the coffee table.

“
It’s perfect,” she smiled
back as she took the tray and placed it in her lap. She picked up
the spoon and pushed the oatmeal around in the bowl for a few
seconds before she decided to take a bite of toast.

As she picked at her breakfast in
silence, David watched her. Harry watched her as well, hoping she
would carelessly drop a nibble. He took his nose and nudged her
leg. Absentmindedly, Paige rubbed his head. With a large sigh and a
low groan of disappointment, Harry lay down on the floor next to
her.

David noticed her slim
hands as she played with the spoon.
“Definitely not the hands of a cop,”
he told himself as he admired her. He felt his cell phone
vibrating in his pocket and ignored it as he watched her try to
eat. He thought she resembled a wet cat. Long and thin. He smiled
when he realized she didn’t eat the oatmeal and barely nibbled on
her toast. When he saw her snub the coffee he remembered, “You need
more cream and sugar, don’t you?”

She smiled at him and begged,
“Please?”

He took the cup from her and headed
toward the kitchen, accepting the fact that she would not eat the
oatmeal. Paige slipped the rest of her toast to Harry who
practically swallowed it whole.

When he returned, she had already
placed the tray on the table with only the toast gone. “Guess
you’re not hungry?” he asked her as he handed the cup to
her.

She shook her head and sipped the
coffee. “This is all I need.” She wrapped her hand around the cup
and took another sip as she pulled her legs back up under her.
“Thanks for taking care of me,” she finally said.

“
Like I said, where else
would I be?”

“
I’m sure you could come
up with at least a hundred things you’d rather be doing,” Paige
said as she tried to sound light.

“
When will you ever
believe me?” he asked as he exaggerated his sigh.

“
Probably never,” she
smiled halfheartedly. “Who would want to be with a cop that never
has time for anything but being a cop? I know I wouldn’t.” Paige
turned toward the window and continued watching the
birds.

David sat next to her on the couch and
took the cup from her hand. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to
be. You know that.” He started rubbing her neck. She tried to relax
feeling his hands caress and squeeze her shoulders as she rolled
her head around. It felt nice.

She didn’t realize just how tense she
was. He slowly rubbed her neck, hitting all of the tight spots and
giving them an extra squeeze. It was painful, she realized, but at
the same time it was a great relief. She leaned back into his arms
and let him hug her tightly.

Paige could feel his cell phone
vibrating in his pocket. She knew he was ignoring it. “You better
get that.”

“
I’ll call them back.
You’re more important,” he whispered as he leaned forward and
kissed her neck softly.

“
Why do you put up with
me?” she asked him as she slowly turned toward him.

“
Because I have to,” he
smiled and started kissing her ear. She whimpered softly as his
lips made their way from her ear to her neck, his hands running up
and down her arms. She let herself go in his caress, wanting to
melt away with him. Feeling herself drift away in the sensations,
she turned toward him to let him kiss her lips. His kiss was soft
and gentle.

Paige opened her eyes and glanced back
out of the window. She could see someone standing in the shadows
behind the trees. She jumped and ran toward the window.

“
What is it?” David asked
as he stood behind her.

“
There, in the trees,” she
pointed. “There was a man, standing there.

I didn’t see where he went, but it
looked like he was watching us.”

“
I don’t see anyone,”
David said as he looked across the yard.

“
Whoever it was is gone
now and I’m sure he couldn’t see in through the window in this
light.”

“
I’m going out to find
him,” Paige started toward the door.

“
Paige, wait. There’s no
one there.” David grabbed her arm, keeping her from running
outside.

Paige whirled about on her heals. “He
was there. I saw him!” she screamed at him.

“
I believe you but he’s
not there now. It’s okay,” he rubbed her shoulders, trying to calm
her down.

“
You’re right,” Paige
forced a smile and stepped away from him.

“
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean
to yell.”

“
That’s okay, Paige,
really,” he pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her
head. “Sit down and drink your coffee.”

Reluctantly, she obeyed, not taking
her eyes off of the tree line.

Nothing else seemed amiss.
The birds were still in search of seed and the squirrel was brave
enough to come back out and forage below.
“I must be seeing things,”
she
thought to herself as she picked the coffee back up to take another
drink. Instead of a sip, she downed the entire cup.

Chapter 6

The next three days passed quickly.
Paige stayed with Sarah at Aileen’s.

She busied herself helping Aileen care
for Sarah, cooking meals, and forcing her to eat them. They made
all of the funeral arrangements with only nods of agreement from
Sarah who hardly spoke a word and rarely acknowledged anyone who
was speaking to her. It was obvious that she was just simply
functioning and was getting worse by the day.

Paige wondered if she should suggest
to Aileen that Sarah needed counseling. She thought about talking
to the therapist who had helped her so much over the past year.
Paige was sure he could help.

As Paige cleared the table from lunch
she remembered when Sarah had found her husband. She was adamant
that someone broke into the house and strangled Anthony even though
there was no sign of a break in. Nothing was taken from the house
and there was not a shred of DNA evidence to be found. There was
only their son, Richard. Sarah told Paige on several occasions that
Anthony argued with Richie about the drugs and alcohol. Some of the
arguments became violent enough that things were thrown and items
around the house were broken but they never actually hit each
other. Sarah believed with all of her heart that neither of them
would ever hurt the other physically.

When Paige questioned
Richie, he didn’t seem upset about his father’s death. He even
claimed to be in the house at the time of the murder but said that
he didn’t hear or see anything. “
How could
he in the state he was in?”
Paige thought
to herself remembering that he was
totally
inebriated that night. She thought about how sad it was that the
sweet little freckled face boy had become so messed up. He was a
great kid; willing to give you the shirt off his back if he thought
you needed or wanted it. Smiling all the time, he was absolutely
full of life. She remembered all of the practical jokes he played
on his dad.