All I Ever Need Is You (16 page)

And, he thought with a grin that he knew bordered on egotistical, thank God she had him on her team. The two of them were damned effective solo—together they were going to be unstoppable.

As he took the spindle with him to his car, along with the picnic basket and blanket, he knew Kerry was right about the pull this place had. Something slightly magical. It wasn’t hard for him to imagine living in this house, on this street, in this neighborhood. Not hard at all, actually, especially if Kerry was there with him.

And as he reluctantly started his car’s engine to head back to work, his father’s words from the day they’d looked over the property suddenly came to him: “
It’s always hard to walk away from something beautiful, isn’t it? Especially when you can sense that giving her your full attention will make both of you happy.”

And it was true that, since the moment he’d met Kerry, she’d completely stolen his attention. There had rarely been a day, rarely been an hour, that he wasn’t thinking of her. That he wasn’t wishing he could see her. Or that he wasn’t longing to hold her in his arms.

And yet, he’d still tried to hold back. Still tried to stick to their arrangement. Still tried to keep from crossing over into what had always been a relationship no-fly zone, thinking that was the only way to be happy. Still believed he couldn’t ever let one little four-letter word catch him in its grip without regretting it.

But what if his father was right?

What if giving Kerry—and their relationship—his full attention made both of them even happier than they had ever been without each other?

When Adam was a kid, his father’s wood shop was where he always could go when there was something he needed to talk about. Fortunately, things hadn’t changed much after they’d grown up, and odds were pretty good on any given afternoon that Max Sullivan would be back there refinishing an old end table or sanding a length of crown molding. Which was why Adam had decided to take a detour to his parents’ house instead of heading straight back to the office.

Of course, his mother would kill him if he didn’t check in with her first. He found her at her writing table by a window in the living room.

“Adam, honey, what a nice surprise this is! I didn’t think we were going to see you until dinner on Friday night.”

He gave her a kiss on her cheek. “How’s your writing coming along?”

She glanced down at the notebook in front of her and frowned. “Why didn’t anyone tell me writing a book was so hard?”

“I’m sure it’s great. Do you want me to read what you’ve come up with so far?”

She looked horrified. “No!” She laughed at herself. “Not yet, anyway, though it’s a lovely offer.” She noticed the spindle in his hand. “I’m assuming you want to see your father about whatever it is you’re holding?”

Nodding, he asked, “Is he out back?”

“He is, and I know he’ll be thrilled to see you. Especially since I’m pretty sure I heard cursing coming from that direction earlier.”

Adam grinned as he headed into the backyard. His father had tackled some pretty difficult projects over the years, such as the armoire he’d built entirely from scratch. According to what his mother had just said, it sounded like a new project was in the works.

At the threshold of the wood shop, Adam poked his head in to make sure his father wasn’t using power tools or anything that could cut off a finger, before he knocked on the door.

“Adam, it’s good to see you.” His mother was right—his father looked immensely relieved by the interruption as he moved away from his lathe. “I could use a beer. Do you want one?”

Opting not to point out that it was only early afternoon, Adam said, “Sure.”

“What have you got there?” His father handed him the beer from the mini-fridge and took the spindle.

“It’s from the big old house that you and I were looking at last week.”

“I keep thinking about that place,” his father said. “You don’t see craftsmanship like this much anymore.”

“How hard do you think it would be to find someone to do this kind of work that wouldn’t break the bank? And is there even anyone out there who can handle doing it for an entire house?”

“I don’t know for sure, but I can ask some guys who are much deeper into this kind of finish work than I am and get back to you.” His father handed back the spindle. “Have you decided to buy the place, then?”

“Actually, a friend of mine bought the house.”

“Is he thinking of keeping it?”

“She wouldn’t dream of tearing it down.”

Adam could see his father note with some surprise that the friend who’d bought the house was a woman. “Must be a woman who has a lot of vision, if she’s not planning to tear it down the way most people would.”

“She’s got a ton of vision. More vision than anyone I’ve ever known.” His father was now looking at him as if he’d grown a second head. His parents knew Adam had female friends, but they’d never heard him talk about one of them so passionately. “She’s Rafe and Brooke’s wedding planner. Kerry Dromoland.”

Another flash of surprise flickered across his father’s face. “I’ve heard great things about Ms. Dromoland.”

“Everything you’ve heard is true. She’s an exceptional wedding planner.” Adam had promised Kerry that they’d keep their relationship a secret, but he trusted his father implicitly. “She’s also the woman I mentioned to you the other day when we were looking at the house.”

“If I recall correctly, you weren’t sure the two of you were even friends yet.”

“We are now.” Adam struggled for a moment with how much to divulge, even to his father. “More than friends, actually. A hell of a lot more.”

Adam hadn’t been planning to come see his father today, hadn’t been planning to tell him all about Kerry either. But now that he was here, he realized just how much he needed to discuss the situation with the man he respected most in the world.

“Rafe and Brooke asked me to meet with her a few weeks ago. They both had scheduling conflicts, but I’m pretty sure it was also a matchmaking attempt on their part, since they could have sent Mia or Mom instead of me. Anyway, during our first meeting, Kerry got to talking about a gazebo she wanted to have built on the beach for the wedding, and I offered to build it for her. Before I left the meeting, I asked her out, but she said no.”

“She turned you down?” His father was grinning now, knowing how rarely a woman ever said no to Adam.

“Without a moment’s hesitation. But I couldn’t shake the sense that she was special, so I didn’t give up. One thing led to another and—” No, he couldn’t go any further with his explanations. Couldn’t betray his intimate secrets with Kerry, not even to his father. “We’re not officially dating, but we do see each other quite often.”

His father nodded. “I see.” And Adam could tell that he did, even though he didn’t ask any clarifying questions about the whole not-dating-but-still-seeing-each-other thing.

“We both thought it would be easy to keep things clearly delineated. No complications, just two friends having a good time. After all, that’s what we both wanted.”

“Both of you?” His father looked more than a little doubtful. “We all love you, Adam, but you know we’re not always crazy about the way you approach women and relationships.”

“I know you’re not, but there’s never been anyone I wanted to have a real relationship with before. And Kerry, she’s been waiting her whole life for the perfect guy, for someone she can count on no matter what. I know on paper that might not look like me, but—”

“But regardless of what your dating history looks like,” his father finished for him, “if Ms. Dromoland doesn’t know that she can count on you as a friend, then she doesn’t know you very well.”

“As a friend, I’m pretty sure she does know I’ll always be there for her. But as more?” Adam walked to the doorway of his father’s wood shop to look out at the oak tree in the backyard. It was big, but not quite as big as the one he and Kerry had just picnicked beneath. “When we first set up our...our arrangement...I told her she didn’t have to worry about me falling for her. I promised her things wouldn’t get messy. I said we would keep things simple, just two friends having fun.” Adam appreciated his father holding his silence while he collected his thoughts. “But when we were over at the house today for lunch to celebrate her signing on the dotted line for it, I realized I wasn’t just happy for her because she’d found her perfect house. The real reason I’m happy is because working on the house with her means we’ll get to spend time together over the next year. A lot of time.” His father joined Adam in the doorway as Adam laid it all on the line. “Before Kerry, I’d find any way I could to avoid entangling things with a woman. But now I’m going out of my way to find ways to tangle things up.”

Now that Adam had started talking about Kerry, he couldn’t stop, couldn’t find a way to stuff it all back in. “Seeing her is the best part of any day, the best thing that happens all week. I think about her all the time. I have to stop myself from showing up at her office and dragging her out to the park or for a sail or just to hang out doing nothing. Kerry shouldn’t have been different. I wasn’t expecting her to be different. Anyone but her, actually. But she is.” By the time he finally finished talking, Adam realized Max was grinning at him.

“Look,” his father said, “I’m not going to lie and say it’s not terrifying. I’m not going to pretend it’s not confusing as hell to feel something so strong that it rocks your world off its axis. Especially when it’s something you might have thought you were never going to feel for anyone.”

“We have an
arrangement
,” Adam explained again. “One she’s been really wed to.” Just the way he’d been wed to it at first, too. It had seemed so perfect—getting to spend nights with a gorgeous woman who didn’t want long term any more than he wanted it. “But then, somehow, somewhere along the line, things changed. And I don’t want to stick to that arrangement anymore.”

“Your whole life, when you’ve wanted to fix things,” his father said in a serious voice, “you’ve fixed them. It’s one of the reasons you’re so good at what you do. Just as you’ve always known when something is so beautiful, so precious, that you can’t possibly walk away without regretting it.”

Max gave Adam a warm hug, one he was surprised to realize he’d really needed. Sometimes it didn’t matter that you were a grown man with a hugely successful business—you needed to be reminded that the people who loved you most were there for you.

“I’m really looking forward to meeting her,” his father said, “more than ever now. Friend or lover or girlfriend, however the two of you work things out, she’ll always be welcome.”

“You’re going to love Kerry.”

“I know we’ll love her, because you do.”

The truth of it hit Adam like a lightning bolt, and not from nearly as far out of the blue as he would have expected.

“You’re right.” He paused, reeling. “I’m in love with her.” He let the word take hold in his head first...and then deep down in his heart. Right where Kerry had already gone. “
Love.
” Amazingly, it didn’t sound, or feel, as strange as he’d thought it would falling from his lips. “I love her.”

His father was clearly beyond pleased, grinning ear to ear while he toasted Adam with his beer bottle. “So, now that you’ve got one big part of the equation figured out, what are you going to do about it?”

Maybe someone else would have given Adam more time to get used to the idea of having done the impossible: actually falling in love. But the Sullivans weren’t like other people, and when love struck, they didn’t waste any time before they did whatever it took to make sure it lasted.

And hell, since he’d already gone and done what should have been impossible, how much bigger a leap was it to jump headfirst into crazy, too?

Adam grinned back, the answer as obvious now as his love for her. “I’m going to tell her.”

He’d already been counting the hours until Thursday night, when he and Kerry were going to meet again. But now the anticipation was nearly going to kill him, because he couldn’t wait to officially change the rules of their arrangement.

Adam Sullivan had finally fallen in love. And now that he had, there was not only no going back, there was also no one else he would ever love the way he loved Kerry.

She was his one. His only.

His
forever
.

The following afternoon, Colleen was almost sparkling as she walked into the café where Kerry was meeting her for a cup of coffee. It had been so long since Colleen had looked happy—truly happy—that Kerry’s heart filled with hope. Maybe her sister had finally turned the corner!

Kerry was really glad she’d moved her meetings around when Colleen had texted from out of the blue asking if they could have lunch. Two unplanned lunches in two days made Kerry’s once perfectly rigid calendar look like a thing of the past, but it actually didn’t bother her all that much. Not when she was feeling kind of sparkly herself lately.

“You look amazing,” Kerry said when they hugged hello.

“I
feel
amazing.” Colleen couldn’t stop smiling as she sat down. The waiter came by and took their coffee orders, with Colleen adding a big piece of chocolate cake for them to share. “I swear this must be the best day of my life.” She hugged herself. “Payton came back to me.”

Kerry was so surprised that everything froze for a moment. Her brain. Her smile.

But especially her heart.

It was suddenly all too clear why Colleen was sparkling and filled with joy: The man she’d never gotten over had returned.

Kerry tried to find words, any words, to say to her sister. But she couldn’t even seem to pry her lips apart at this point, not unless she wanted her sister to see her growling over Payton’s return.

Fortunately, Colleen was too far over the moon to notice Kerry’s reaction. “He was waiting on my front step last night with flowers. The most beautiful bouquet you’ve ever seen. He said he was sorry. So sorry that he ever hurt me. He said he’s missed me every second we’ve been apart. He said he never stopped loving me, and then he begged me to forgive him.” Colleen put her hand over her heart and sighed happily. “We weren’t even inside the house and he said all of that. He couldn’t wait another second to let me know that he’s a changed man.”

“Wow.”

It was the best Kerry could do right then, but she knew she needed to do better. Adam had helped her with her sister enough times that now she found herself wishing he could be there with them again. Maybe he could have helped her figure out what to do and how she could possibly help her sister now. The strangers her sister met at bars had all been horrible, but Payton had never been much better. In fact, he was probably worse, because when he told Colleen he loved her, she believed him, and then she fell apart when he cheated on her repeatedly, stole from her, and then left her.

“What did you do?” Kerry finally managed. “What did you say?”

“You mean before or after we went inside and had the world’s best make-up sex?” Colleen laughed, loudly enough that several other people in the coffee shop looked over and smiled at them. “I told him I’d never stopped loving him either.” Colleen held out her hand, and Kerry finally saw the engagement ring. “We’re going to Vegas tonight to get married.”

“Tonight?”

Oh God, how could Kerry possibly talk her sister out of getting married when she had only a matter of hours?

“Sorry, sis,” Colleen said with a shrug. “I know you probably want to throw us one of your fancy weddings, but that’s never been my speed.” And it was true that even as kids, her sister had never been the least bit interested in their mother’s wedding business. “One of those Elvis-themed chapels is going to be
perfect.
”

Kerry knew she had to be careful how she approached this situation, even more careful than she’d been before. “Are you sure you want to move so quickly? Maybe you could see how the next few weeks or months go, and then—”

“The way I feel about him isn’t going to change.” Colleen looked absolutely certain. “I’ve loved him from the first day. I’ll love him until the last. So why should we wait?”

Because he doesn’t seem to love you the same way!

It took all of Kerry’s self-control not to blurt out the words that would, without a doubt, rip her sister away from her forever.

The chocolate cake came, and Colleen took a huge bite. “Got to get back some of those calories I burned last night.
All
night long, thank you very much. God, he’s such an amazing lover. Better than ever before, actually, now that we’re back together.” She gestured to Kerry’s fork. “You should eat some before I mow through the whole thing.”

Kerry made herself pick up her fork, if for no other reason than to buy herself some time to figure out what to say. There had to be a way to get through to Colleen.

But before she could come up with any way to approach it that wouldn’t have her sister throwing her fork at her and storming out of the café, Colleen said, “So, how’s the hunk?”

Kerry froze again, this time with her fork halfway into the cake. “The hunk?”

Colleen rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on, don’t play dumb with me and act like you don’t know who I’m talking about.”

If they were still as close as they’d once been when they were little girls, Kerry would have already told her sister all about Adam. About how happy he made her. About how he was teaching her how much fun it could be to actually
have
fun. And about how sometimes...sometimes she found herself wanting more than just an
arrangement
of friends getting some sexy benefits with each other in a hotel once a week.

But ever since Colleen had first started dating Payton, her sister had pulled away, and it had been a long time since they’d shared secrets.

Knowing it was by only the barest luck that her sister had been too self-involved to ask about
the hunk
before now, Kerry said, “Adam’s fine.”

“Fine?” Colleen took another huge bite of cake. “He looked a hell of a lot better than fine those two times I saw him. Just a few little details between sisters, that’s all I’m asking for.”

Knowing Colleen wouldn’t stop pushing until she got something out of her, Kerry said, “We have fun together.”

“Multiple-times-a-night fun, I hope. I mean, when a guy looks like he does.”

Kerry knew the color taking over her cheeks was giving away just how true that was, even as she tried to shift directions by saying, “We’re friends.”

Her sister gave her a knowing look. “Friends who are clearly having slamming-hot sex.” Colleen looked even more pleased when Kerry’s blush confirmed it. “Good for you, finally letting go for once in your life.
And
with one of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen while you’re at it!”

On the nights when Colleen had been drunk and said these kinds of things, Kerry had been able to blame it on the alcohol. But at noon on a Thursday in the middle of a crowded downtown café, she finally had to admit that Colleen truly thought she
was
uptight and boring.

“Now that you’ve hooked him in the sack,” her sister continued, “we just have to figure out how to get him to declare his undying love for you and give you that ring I know you’re longing for.”

“I’m not longing for a ring!” Kerry shot back before she could moderate her tone. “I told you, we’re just friends. The fact that we’re having sex doesn’t mean anything.”

Colleen’s eyebrows went up in surprise. “Wow, look who finally got a backbone.”

Kerry had to grit her teeth to keep from snarling.

“Look,” Colleen said in a soothing tone, “I can see that you believe what you’re saying, but the truth is—sex always means something. It’s why I was so upset with Payton when he cheated on me. And it’s also why I never slept with any of the guys at those bars.”

Just as quickly as she’d fired up, Kerry felt herself deflate. She hadn’t been surprised by all the talk about hot sex, but hearing this wisdom coming from her sister, who had been falling deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole these past few months? Honestly, it was almost as unexpected as Colleen’s take on the importance of sex.

And then her sister surprised her yet again by putting her hand over Kerry’s. “You’re so in love with Adam. Anyone can see it in the dreamy expression on your face when you’re talking about him. Anyone can hear it in the way you say his name, like it’s the most beautiful word in the world.” Colleen squeezed her hand. “Why won’t you just admit it?”

Admit that she’d fallen in love with Adam?

Panic gripped Kerry like a vise, wrapping so tightly around her chest that she could barely breathe. “I’m not...I’m not in…”

She couldn’t bring herself even to say the word
love.
Not when even that felt like too much of an admission.

“It’s not a crime to fall in love, you know,” Colleen said. “No matter what Mom always said. Just because her relationship with our father was bad doesn’t mean that we should have to settle for boring sticks in the mud just to try to keep ourselves safe from heartache.” Colleen looked into Kerry’s eyes. “Forget what you’ve always been told. Forget what you’ve always thought you needed to do, the person you’ve always thought you needed to be. What do
you
want?”

“I just want to be happy.”

“And does Adam make you happy?”

“He does.”
So happy.
“But—”

“You’re overthinking it all,” Colleen said with a disappointed shake of her head. “Just can’t get Mom’s voice out of your head, can you?”

“It’s not just Mom,” Kerry said. How could she just leap and not worry about the fall? How could anyone? “I mean, you were so upset these past months, too.”

“I know my relationship with Payton isn’t perfect,” Colleen admitted, “but I still love him, so of course I want to take him back and try again. And, honestly, I’ve never felt so happy in all my life. Don’t you want to feel this good? Like you could fly? Like anything is possible? Like nothing could ever bring you down again?”

“Of course I do,” Kerry told her sister. And the truth was that she felt all of those things every time she was with Adam.

But the part of the equation that her sister was conveniently leaving off was—what if you were happy for a little while, and then later, it turned out to be only a fleeting happiness when the crash came and your heart was crushed into a million little pieces? Wouldn’t that mean you’d been foolish to have placed all of your faith in that happiness?

Especially when Kerry not only knew enough about Adam’s past to know what a huge risk it would be to give her heart to him, but she also knew precisely what he didn’t want from his future.
“You’re looking for forever with someone and I’m not,”
was what he’d flat-out said to her that day they’d agreed to meet at hotels for sexy fun. And then later, when she’d started to freak out about getting too close to him, he’d reminded her,
“We’re both adults. It’s not going to get messy.”

He was clearly a master at arrangements like theirs. Whereas she was the one in danger of making the mistake of letting her emotions tangle up with all the sex so that it started to look like love.

“He’s here!”

Colleen’s face lit up again, brighter than ever, as she leapt out of her seat. Kerry turned to see Payton walk through the door, smug as always in the knowledge that he had all the power.

He looked in no way regretful or apologetic. On the contrary, Kerry thought he looked more cocky than ever—now that he knew for sure he could screw around on her sister as much as he wanted and Colleen would wait for him whenever he decided to come back to her for a little while.

Kerry’s fists curled beneath the tablecloth, and she had to work to shove down the fierce urge to punch him as he said, “Kerry, it’s good to see you again.”

Even though she knew how badly her sister wanted her to accept Payton back into their lives, Kerry simply couldn’t lie and tell him anything about this situation was good. She wanted to drag him outside and tell him what a mess her sister’s life had been for the past several months. She wanted to show him all the nasty bars Colleen had gotten drunk in. She wanted to introduce him to all of the creeps who could have hurt her sister. She wished she could show him just how deep the destruction he’d wrought had been.

Kerry was glad for her heels so that she was eye to eye with the jerk, and he wouldn’t get to feel that he was towering over her. She had to forcefully unclench her teeth as she said, “Payton.”

Thankfully, he was smart enough not to try to hug her, or even to shake her hand. But Colleen was so high up in the clouds that she didn’t seem to notice any of the tension between her boyfriend—oh God, he was her fiancé now—and her sister.

“I was just telling Kerry how incredibly happy we are,” Colleen told him. “So happy that we’ve decided to head to Vegas to make it official.”

Payton smiled at Colleen. “You ready to go now, baby? I can’t wait another second to make you mine.”

“I’m more than ready.” Colleen kissed him passionately in full view of everyone at the café.

“I’ll pick us up a couple of coffees for the road while you say good-bye to your sister.”

Kerry tried to smile back at her beaming sister. “I hope he’s good to you, Colleen. I hope you’ll be happy. That’s all I want for you, too.”

“I know.” Her sister’s smile suddenly fell away as her expression grew serious. In a soft voice that only Kerry could hear, Colleen said, “Thanks for all those nights you came to get me. Without you, I might have gotten into some really bad scrapes.”

More than anything in the world, Kerry wanted to save her sister from another bad scrape. Quite possibly one of the worst of all—marrying someone who would never treat her right. Only, Kerry knew she couldn’t save her sister this time. Just as Adam had said, Colleen would have to decide to save herself.

Which meant that there was nothing left for Kerry to say, except for the one thing that would never change no matter how much friction there was between her and her sister. “I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you, too, little sis.”

And as they hugged, Kerry hoped her sister could hear everything she was forcing herself not to say aloud:
No matter what, no matter when, anytime you need me, all you have to do is call, and I’ll be there.

* * *

Kerry paid the bill for the coffee and cake, then went to the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face. It didn’t help, unfortunately, and she still looked pale and shell-shocked by everything that had just happened. But she would have to find a way to put it all out of her head for a few hours, because she had some really important afternoon meetings.