Read Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men, Women and Couples Online
Authors: Jack Morin Ph.d.
Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men, Women and Couples (17 page)
After observing about 600 men and women (ages 18-89) being sexual in the laboratory, sex research pioneers Masters and Johnson (1966) conceptualized sexual response as having four phases: excitement, plateau, orgasm and resolution. During each phase, observable or measurable changes occur throughout the body, including the anus. These bodily changes are similar regardless of the kind of stimulation you're receiving or from whom-as long as it's working for you. Whether you're masturbating alone, making love with your spouse, or having casual sex with a stranger, if you're turned on, your body responds pretty much the same way. There is, however, tremendous variety in how arousal and orgasm are subjectively perceived by the person experiencing them.
Today's sex therapists are keenly aware that yet another phase-desire-is usually a prerequisite for all the others. But desire takes many forms. At one end of the spectrum is horniness-an unmistakable urge to think about or actively seek sex. The most subtle form of desire is willingness-being open to trying something sensual or sexual and seeing what happens. Willingness is extremely important, not only because it's a fundamental expression of consent, but also because many people need to get some physical arousal going before they start to feel strong desire. Without genuine willingness, erotic exploration of any kind becomes burdensome and distasteful.
Becoming attuned to how your body changes during sex not only helps increase your enjoyment, it also expands the range of choices available to you during sex-such as adjusting the timing, rhythm, or intensity. I'm including what is known about what happens to the anus, rectum, and surrounding areas as excitement builds. Masters and Johnson made relatively superficial observations of the anus, as it was not their primary concern, and no other laboratory research has yet been done to fill the gap. Therefore, I'm also relying on information I've gathered over many years from extensive subjective reports from my clients. Keep in mind, though, that we're all notoriously-and appropriately-non-objective when sexually aroused.
ExcITEMENT. Sexual arousal is the body's natural response to effective erotic stimulation, which may be received via any of the five senses or solely from our thoughts or fantasies. Whatever its form, stimulation must be interpreted by the individual as erotic to trigger a sexual response. The mind can assign sexual significance to virtually any sensation or image. Conversely, stimulation that's highly erotic to one person may be downright boring to someone else. In general, humans appear to receive most erotic stimulation through the senses of touch and vision. But there's tremendous variation here, with some people responding strongly to smells, tastes, or sounds.
Effective stimulation affects the entire body. As excitement builds, respiration, heart rate and blood pressure increase. Through a process called vasocongestion, blood rushes to certain areas so that more blood is flowing into that area than out, resulting in engorgement. Vasocongestion is caused by the dilation (opening up) of arteries and tiny capillaries. Sexual response involves widespread vasocongestion, not just in the genitals. Extra blood also flows to the surface of the body, resulting in sensations of increased warmth, perspiration, or visible flushing on the face, neck, or chest.
During early excitement, a wide variety of muscle groups-especially arms, legs, face, and the entire pelvis-increase their muscle tone noticeably as they collect erotic charge. This process is called myotonia. Contracting muscles are responsible for the nipple erections experienced by virtually all women and at least one-third of men.
Paradoxically, excitement brings an increase in sensitivity to pleasurable touch and sometimes also a blunting of sensitivity to pain. In short, a wider range of stimulation feels good when we're aroused.
The most noticeable sign of excitement for men is erection-the result of vasocongestion-which may occur within a few seconds of any effective stimulation or more gradually, depending on each individual's response patterns, age, level of arousal, and sense of comfort and safety. Erection occurs when the arteries that feed blood into the penis relax, allowing the cavernous bodies of absorbent tissue within the penis to fill with blood. At the same time the veins that are usually open close off, trapping blood and sustaining the erection. Contrary to still-popular myths, the capacity for erection is inborn and operates even before birth. No skill, learning, power or virility is required, and attempts to force an erection typically disrupt it. Overemphasis on the meaning and importance of erections, or insecurities about one's desirability or adequacy-especially worries about sexual performance-can easily inhibit erections.
In the early stages of excitement, erections are relatively unstable and react even to small fluctuations in excitement, as well as to distractions. As excitement rises, erections becomes more stable. At the same time the scrotum thickens and contracts, becoming less "baggy," although this response is variable. Inside the scrotum, the testicles, suspended by muscles and ligaments, begin to elevate.
The first genital response to sexual excitement in women is lubrication seeping through the vaginal walls-also caused by vasocongestion. As arousal builds, the vaginal walls thicken and grow darker. The inner two-thirds of the vagina expand and lengthen. The outer and especially the inner lips darken and swell.
In both men and women, the anus is actively involved in the excitement phase. The anal tissues, rich with blood vessels and blood-absorbing spaces, become congested, resulting in a noticeable deepening in color. Usually moist from its mucus membranes, the inner anal canal may secrete even more. Perspiration around the anal canal also contributes to increased moisture. A few people become so moist that no extra lubrication is required even for anal intercourse, although this is rarely the case. It is not known if the amount of anal secretion is related to how sexually excited the person is.
The anal sphincters start to twitch and contract in response to direct stimulation or in unison with other pelvic muscles. Just as men and women may contract their pelvic muscles voluntarily to enhance their arousal, voluntary contractions of the anal sphincters can also heighten pleasure. Many people enjoy the unique sensation of the anus contracting against something such as a finger, dildo, or penis.
Anal contractions during excitement should not be confused with chronic anal tension or with situational anal spasms caused by fear of anal penetration. These types of anal tension actually inhibit the spontaneous contractions of the anus during excitement. It has been almost universally reported to me that the range of anal muscular activity-contraction and relaxation-increases as arousal builds, especially for those whose anuses have become more relaxed generally. This observation needs further investigation because, as we have seen, anal relaxation goes along with anal awareness. It could be that people who report more muscular activity have simply become more self-aware. It also seems reasonable that anal awareness might motivate a person deliberately to relax and contract the anus for the sheer enjoyment of it.
Sensitivity to anal touch appears to increase during excitation, at least for those who like it. Within the anal muscles and nearby perineal muscles (between the genitals and anus) are a great many nerve endings that can be stimulated not only by contractions but also by external touch.
For a man, two additional sources of pleasure may become involved when a finger (his own or his partner's) is inserted into his anus. First, because the internal bulb (end point) of the penis is very close to the anus, stimulating it through the rectal wall can feel something like being masturbated from inside. Then there's the prostate gland, which can be stimulated by inserting a finger about three inches into the anus and lower rectum and moving it in the direction of the navel. Generally, the prostate can't easily be felt as a separate organ during early excitement because it's soft, like other organs in the vicinity. Some men find prostate stimulation to be extremely pleasurable. Others find it irritating. Poking the prostate rather than stroking it, however, is almost universally unpleasant.
You may recall from Chapter 6 that some women have a particularly sensitive area called the G-spot in front of the vaginal wall, which has similarities to the prostate in men, except it's not a discrete organ. It's quite possible for G-spot stimulation to result in a noticeable expulsion of fluid-anywhere from a little to a lot-out of the urethral opening during orgasm, similar to a man's ejaculation. But unlike the prostate, the G-spot cannot be effectively stimulated through the rectal wall because it's too far away. However, some women thoroughly enjoy rectal massage combined with G-spot stimulation via the vagina, usually with the help of a vibrator, dildo, or lover's finger(s). The only precaution is to use different hands or objects for rectal and vaginal insertion.
I am quite sure that for many women, an important source of pleasure during anal play with a finger results from the fairly close proximity of the clitoral bulbs to the rectal wall. This may be part of the reason why women appear to be far more likely than men to experience orgasms with anal stimulation, without any direct genital touch. Another reason for this difference is probably the fact that women typically respond to a wider range of stimuli than men, who tend to require direct genital touch along with anal touch to climax.
For some men, focused anal stimulation may lead to a partial or total loss of erection. Some are concerned about this, others aren't. Sometimes erection loss is clearly a reflection of discomfort or anxiety, but not necessarily. In fact, the man may be thoroughly enjoying himself. His loss of erection probably indicates that his erotic attention has shifted from the penis to the anus.
PLATEAU. The plateau phase is a sustained high level of excitement that usually leads into orgasm within a few seconds or many minutes. Many people learn to extend plateau as long as possible with the help of deep breathing, partial relaxation of the pelvic muscles, and subtle adjustments to the rhythm and intensity of stimulation. Sometimes plateau is absent as a discrete phase, with building excitement leading directly to an orgasm. This pattern is typical of rapid ejaculation in men and is less common in women.
During plateau, vasocongestion and myotonia are at a high level all over the body, although different body zones may be affected in different people. Rapid breathing is usually obvious. Some people naturally hold their breath for a few moments and then release it almost explosively.
In men the penis may become even more rigid as the glans, or head, enlarges and takes on a purplish hue. The testicles also enlarge and pull up closely against the body. The scrotum may be drawn up tightly, or may hang loosely with the testicles fully elevated inside. The tiny Cowper's glands secrete a small amount of clear fluid that may appear at the urethral opening, sometimes in sufficient enough quantities to dribble noticeably. Popularly called "pre-come," this fluid is not semen through it may contain sperm. Its function is to prepare the urethra for the passage of sperm by lowering its acidity.
In women the outer third of the vagina congests with blood and forms the "orgasmic platform." Later, orgasmic contractions will be obvious here. The inner portion of the vagina expands still further. The uterus becomes fully elevated, contributing to a "tenting effect" of the innermost vagina.
The clitoris retracts under its hood during plateau, particularly if stimulated directly. Full congestion of the inner lips results in a deeper color and signals an approaching orgasm. Vaginal lubrication may slow down or cease during plateau. But the Bartholin glands, like the male's Cowper's glands, secrete scantily, presumably to make the vagina more chemically hospitable for sperm.
The anus continues its irregular contractions during the plateau phase. If direct anal stimulation has been a part of the sexual play, many men and women report that the anus feels particularly receptive and open just prior to orgasm. Pelvic movements during intercourse or at other times appear to increase anal sensations for some people, while others prefer to lie still and focus quietly on their intensifying responses.
Among men, erection loss while receiving anal stimulation seems to be less common during the plateau phase, although it still can occur. Sometimes physical or emotional discomfort is a factor. For others, the anus is simply their primary erotic focus at the moment.
During plateau, many men find their prostates to be particularly sensitive to stimulation through the wall of the lower rectum with a finger, object, or penis. In preparation for orgasm, the prostate enlarges and becomes firm and lumpy rather than soft. At this point a man can use his finger to massage his own prostate and to feel its shape and sensitivity.
ORGASM. For both genders, orgasm is the discharge of sexual tension through rhythmic, involuntary muscle contractions. Orgasm can, however, be influenced by deliberate adjustments in stimulation, position, muscle tension or relaxation, and fantasies. Orgasms can be inhibited by trying too hard. In this way, orgasm shares a similarity with crying; you allow it to happen, usually with a subjective sense of surrender or letting go. The entire body is involved in orgasm: arms and legs may become rigid and extended; hands may grasp; facial muscles become contorted; the person seems to be gasping for breath, holding it, or intensely inhaling and exhaling. Some may moan or scream, perhaps even laugh or cry.
In men, orgasm begins with contractions of the internal sex organs: vas deferens, seminal vesicles, and prostate. These organs pour some of their contents into the dilated (open) ejaculatory duct. This movement of fluid is experienced subjectively as, "I'm about to come." Indeed, once these fluids are in the ejaculatory duct, ejaculation is inevitable. Any attempts to postpone ejaculation must be made prior to this point of no return. Next, contractions spread to more powerful pelvic muscles. Contractions of the bulbocavernosus muscle against the interior base of the penis, as well as contractions of the urethra, propel the semen out of the penis.