Blame It on the Shame (Blame It on the Shame: Lou-Lou and Ricardo's Story #1) (26 page)

I nod and blow the smoke out of my face. “Not that I'm not happy about the sudden change of plans and all. But can I ask
why
the plan has changed?”

He stares me down. “A number of factors.” He rubs his chin. “The first plan didn't work out quite like I'd hoped.”

I start panicking. “I'm sorry, mio amore. It's only been a couple of weeks...” I start rattling off.

“I didn't say I was
displeased
about the sudden turn of events, Lucianna,” he snaps and I shut my mouth. “In fact, I'm very pleased by your loyalty to
me
.”

He grabs the back of my neck and pulls my face close to his. “I know without a shadow of a doubt now that we are meant to be.”

“Of course, we're meant to be,” I whisper while looking down because there's no way I can look at him and say that.

“What do you need me to do, Bruno?”

“I want you to be my little spy.”

“I thought I was already doing that?”

His eyes darken. “I want your main focus to be on my son.”

All the air leaves my lungs and I begin suffocating. I wave my hand around the smoke from his cigar, blaming it on that.

“Why do you need me to focus on him?”

He huffs and pushes a button beside him, letting some of the smoke clear out. “My son called me the other night.”

This is complete news to me. “He did?”

“Yes,” he says. “We spoke for awhile. And do you know what he ended our conversation with?”

When I don't answer, he continues, “He said—I'll see you when you get home from Italy....
Babbo
.”

I open my mouth to ask what the big deal is but I close it when he says. “He hasn't addressed me as his Babbo since he was a boy, a teenager.”

Damn, Ricardo wasn't kidding about his plan.

DeLuca's eyes light up and he grabs my chin. “I don't know what you've been doing to my son, Bambina but I need you to
keep
doing it.”

Oh. Fuck.

“What?” I screech. “I'm not doing—”

He gives me an odd look. “Ricardo tells me you've been singing my praises. He said you told him about how I saved you when you were a child.” His eyes soften. “I didn't ask you to do any of that but you did it anyway. You
knew
how important having my son look up to me is and you
did
that for me. Do you know how
much
that means to me?”

“I—” I'm at a loss for words.

Ricardo's
good
.

He puffs on his cigar and a smile spreads across his face. “I figure, if you keep working your magic on him, he'll be open to taking over the family business one day.” His smile turns wicked. “But I'm not
stupid
enough to believe his act for one goddamned second. Not until I have some
solid
proof.”

My stomach turns sour. “How do you know it's an act maybe he—”

He turns his dark gaze on me. “Are you
defending
him to me?”

“No,” I say. “God,
no.
Bruno, I was only—”

“Well
don't
,” he snaps. “Really, you were doing so well, Lucianna.”

“Sorry,” I say. “I know how important Ricardo is to you. I just...I want the best for you, mio amore. I want to see you happy.”

“That's why I need you to stay here. Tell me if his new change of heart is genuine. Keep singing my praises. Make him see how important him being part of our family is.” He chuckles and snuffs out his cigar. “After all, you will be his step-mother one day.”

I slip a finger under my new choker, hoping to get some air.

I can't breathe. I'm suffocating.

Oh god, I'm dying.

I feel a hand pressing down on my back. “Before you get your hopes up, this is
not
a proposal. I need to know with utmost certainty that I can trust you before that happens.”

I somehow find my voice because I have no choice but to right now. This is survival. “You think you can't trust me?”

He flicks a hand in my direction. “Of course, I can trust you. You wouldn't be alive if I couldn't. Because if I couldn't trust you...there's no way I could love you as much as I do. Stop being so fucking sensitive. There's a reason I've never taken a wife before is all I'm saying.”

Yeah, because you killed Ricardo's mom and any other female that crosses you.

Hell, anyone that crosses you...period.

“And to answer your question,” he says. “I'm visiting with family in Italy.” He snarls. “Taking care of some old family business.”

I have no idea what he's talking about but the look on his face tells me not to question him further about it.

He skims the side of my breast and I try not to wince. “I won't be here for your birthday and I'm sorry about that. But I hope you like the jewelry I got you.”

“It's beautiful,” I lie. “Thank you.”

He pulls the straps to my tank top down and cups both my breasts while I fight back vomit. “You gonna
show
me how much you like it, Bambina?” he sneers. “You gonna let me fuck you the way I
deserve
to without all that shit in your system this time?”

I close my eyes so he doesn't see the tears welling in them. I don't know if I can do this without drugs...but I have to.

I know he'll most likely give them to me if I ask but I promised Ricardo I wouldn't.

“Okay,” I choke out. I lower my tank top past my breasts. “Do as you wish, Bruno.”

I feel his hot breath on my nipples and the tremors start to take over.

I feel the shame and the dirtiness wash over me.

God, how I wish I was free from this prison.

“I'm sorry, Mr. DeLuca,” a voice interrupts on the intercom. “But your son is on the phone. I'm transferring it to your cell. He says it's important.”

I take a deep breath and my tears change to those of happiness.

Bruno makes a sound from somewhere deep in his throat before yanking his phone out of his pocket.

“What?” he grumbles.

I take the opportunity to slip my top back up.

“Is that one of your town cars in the parking lot of my apartment complex?” I hear Ricardo's voice ask.

Bruno shifts in his seat. “Yeah. Why? Am I in violation of some sort of parking code?” he spits out sarcastically.

Ricardo laughs but it doesn't sound sincere at all. It sounds downright sinister. “No, but you are violating what's
mine
.”

DeLuca looks confused and I'm sure my eyes bug out of my head.

Jesus Christ...he's going to get me killed.

“
What
?” DeLuca sneers.

“My mustang,” Ricardo says, his tone much lighter now. “Your car is blocking my baby. I'd say that's a pretty serious violation, Babbo.”

My chest spasms when reality sets in
. Of course, he's referring to his mustang and not me...because I'll never be his.

DeLuca shakes his head in frustration. There's no doubt in my mind that Ricardo's attempt at a joke has thrown him off. “Why didn't you just tell the driver to move?”

“Well, I wanted to talk to you. I figured since you're here we could grab a bite to eat. Sit down and talk about the club and stuff.”

Bruno crinkles his brows and checks his watch. “Fuck.” He presses a button and the divider comes back down. “I can't. I'm going back to Italy. My pilot should be clearing for takeoff any minute.”

“That's a shame. Maybe when you get back. Have a safe flight,” Ricardo says before he hangs up.

Bruno mutters something about Mustang's being stupid under his breath before he looks at me. “I'm sorry, Bambina. I have to leave.”

I try to look sad but I can barely contain the smile on my face. “It's okay. I know you have to take care of business. When will I see you again?”

He kisses my forehead. “I'll be back the third week of August. So a little over three weeks. I know it's a long time but it's important I take care of this.” He kisses my hand. “I want to ensure our future together is the very best one.”

I couldn't care less what he has to take care of in Italy, I'm just happy he'll be gone for a few more weeks.

I have my freedom, even if it's only for a little while longer.

The car begins to move and I climb off his lap. I reach for the door handle but he pulls me back to him. “I love you, Lucianna.”

Christ, it's like he can't get enough of saying that lately.

“I'll see you when you get back, mio amore.”

The car pulls around to the front of the complex but DeLuca yells at the driver so he pulls the car toward the back of the building.

I step out but his voice halts me. “You really like your new jewelry?”

“Of course.”

His gaze cuts right through me. “Then I expect you to never take it off. And by expect...I mean
don't
.”

It's only when I close the door and the car pulls away that I realize.

I'm not free at all.

My new jewelry is bugged. He wasn't joking about using me to spy on Ricardo.

It's also how he's going to be spying on
me
as well.

The next thought slams through me and I want to put my fist through a wall.

There's no doubt in my mind that if he bugged my jewelry, my phone is bugged too.

Which means I have
no
way of warning Ricardo about it.

My heart pulls when I realize that whatever was happening between us has officially ended.

Chapter 17 (Ricardo)

“Thanks, Emilio. I owe you. Let me know when you drop him off at the airport,” I say before hanging up the phone.

Every minute that went by while she was with him in that car made me want to kill someone...namely him.

Then when Emilio text me to let me know their talking had suddenly stopped...I saw red.

Just like now as I'm watching her walk up the stairs and she proceeds to ignore me while making a beeline for her apartment.

We didn't leave off on the best of terms but that was
her
doing.

She didn't trust me to get her out of seeing him...which means she
wanted
to see him.

She didn't choose me...but then again, she already told me she never would.

Beside me, Tyrone gives me a smirk. “Trouble in paradise already?”

Jackson hikes his gym bag up his shoulder and whistles. “Shit, Ricardo. How much does DeLuca pay you to coach us?”

“What?”

Tyrone laughs. “Damn, I know every kiss begins with
Kay
...and with
that
bling around her neck...you'd think home girl would break you off a few instead of blatantly ignoring you.”

That's when I notice the very expensive designer necklace she's wearing.

“It's not
Kay.
It's
Buccellati
.”

And it's
hideous...
no doubt custom designed by DeLuca himself.

It's also something the Lou-Lou that
I've
come to know wouldn't wear.

I've never seen her wear jewelry...which means she most likely doesn't like it all that much.

She tries to get her key in the lock but it slips due to her hands shaking. I grit my teeth when I notice she's wearing a matching bracelet.

“I'll meet you at the gym,” I say in their direction before heading over to her.

“Are you okay?”

Her big doe eyes dart around wildly and she gives me a subtle shake of her head. “Yeah. I'm fine.”

Her mixed signals tell me that she's obviously trying to warn me of something, but what?

I take another step forward. “Are you sure?”

“I already told you, I'm fine.
Happy
even, seeing as I just saw mio amore.” My stomach knots, I've never hated a set of words more in my life. “I really miss him. I love him so much,” she adds to drive the knife in deeper.

I ignore the way my guts twist and notice how her eyes keep pleading with me to stay back and keep my distance.

That's when it hits me.

He bugged her new jewelry. And I have no way of knowing whether it's audio, video, or both.

By the looks of it, neither does she.

She subtly taps the cellphone in her pocket with the hand not wearing the bracelet. I'd already figured out awhile ago that her phone was bugged and he was most likely reading any text messages and listening to any phone calls she made.