Clash (9 page)

Chapter Eighteen

Dylan

“No, please stop.” I woke to the sounds of crying.

“Stop. It hurts.” Another pained cry and my body tensed as I realized Payton was thrashing at my side. “Don’t hurt me, please.”

“Payton, angel, wake up.” I rose up on my elbow and began to lightly shake her.

Her cries grew more intense as her lower lip trembled in fear. She was starting to freak me the fuck out.

“Baby, wake up.” I shook her again.

She pulled away from my touch and shielded her body with her hands. “No,” she cried out loudly, and as my door flew open, the light from the hall filtered in. Both Payton and I were still naked from our earlier events, and the fact Guy was only five feet away from her as her tits were on full display pissed me off.

“Get the fuck out,” I hollered as I shielded her body with mine.

“Is she okay?” he asked, actually looking concerned.

“She’s fine,” I said.

By this time Payton was awake and taking in the situation. Once she realized she was naked and Guy was in the room, she grabbed the blanket and pulled it tightly to her chest. Her gaze shifted to mine and a look of confusion covered her face.

“She was just having a nightmare,” I whispered as I looked directly at her. Her eyes shifted downward and I knew she was hiding something.

“I’m fine,” she whispered.

“Fuck, man,” Guy groaned. “It didn’t sound fine. Shit scared the hell out of me.” He grumbled as he turned around and left the room.

When my bedroom door was shut I slid closer and placed my finger under her chin, forcing her to look up at me. “What’s going on?”

“It was just a dream.” She looked away from me, and I knew she was lying.

“No, it was a nightmare. Can you tell me about it?” I soothingly rubbed her leg that was stretching out from beneath the blankets. Still to this day, Payton became so closed off with memories of her earlier life. It was as if she felt safer hiding. I fucking hated what John had done to her. If I could get my hands on that man for five minutes I would make him regret ever laying a hand on her or even raising his voice in her presence.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She rested back against the pillow and pulled the covers around her tighter. Curling into herself, she began to shut me out.

“Payton, I just…” I stopped when she shook her head, telling me no.

My chest ached instantly. It was driving me crazy that after all this time, the fucked up shit from her past was still coming back to haunt her.

Without saying another word I lay down beside her and wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her tightly against me. I placed a gentle kiss against her bare shoulder, hoping that alone would let her know how much she meant to me.

I fell for Payton hard and fast. I had always loved her—after all, she had been a part of our family for a long time. But what I felt for her now was way beyond that. Now when I look at her I see the beautiful woman she has become, not the sad girl she once was. I just wish she could see what I see. I wish for one moment she could understand just how amazing and kind she is.

***

I woke the next morning after ten. Immediately feeling the mattress at my side, I found it empty and a panicked feeling shot through me.

I jumped up from the bed and slid on my shorts that were thrown over the chair.

Hurrying toward the kitchen in hopes of finding Payton, I was faced with Todd lounging back in a chair with a smirk on his face.

“You lose something?” he asked.

Motherfucker was trying to get under my skin already.

“Because I would be more than happy to search that sweet thing out. But just so you know, if I find her, I keep her.” He smiled when I started in his direction.

“What the fuck is your problem?” I asked as I stopped only inches from him.

“Just don’t think you deserve her,” he said as he stood from the chair, now face to face with me. “You waited until she was interested in someone else to give her a shot. Strung her along until you realized other guys saw what you couldn’t.”

“You have no idea what was going on between us or why I held back. You think you fucking have it all figured out, but you don’t know shit.” I shoved against his chest because I was tired of his fucking bullshit. “You think you deserve her? The guy who convinces a girl they’re something special so he can later fuck her then drop her faster than she can argue?”

He shoved me and I stumbled back a few steps. “Yeah…like you’ve never fucked some girl only to act like you don’t know her the next day. I’ve watched that shit happen myself. So don’t go playing the fucking good guy.”

Without thinking about it another minute I swung my fist and connected with his jaw. He stumbled back into the table and the dishes crashed to the floor.

The next few minutes went by in a blur as he dove for me and we both hit the floor. Fists were flying and sounds of knuckles connecting with flesh filled the kitchen. Shouts from the guys who had come running could barely be heard above the scuffle.

The adrenaline within me was a rush. My heart beat so fast as I continued to pound on Todd’s ribs with his head pinned beneath my arm. He grunted with each impact of my fist.

“Stay the fuck away from her, you piece of shit,” I said as I swung once again before being pulled off of him. His sorry ass crumbled to the floor and I struggled against whoever had hold of me.

I was dragged out of the room, one guy on each side of me. Once we were in the hall they let go of me and blocked my path back to the kitchen. “What the fuck, Dylan? I warned both of you. This shit can’t keep happening,” Bryson said. He was a legacy; generations of men who had led the Sigma Alpha Phi’s.

“Would you let him run on about fucking your girl without doing something about it?” I asked as I lifted my hand to my lip. Blood was trickling down from my lip and it stung from the contact. “He can’t face the fact she is with me and not him. Hell, they were only friends, and he has some fucked up image in his mind of it being something more.”

“We can’t have you two fighting over some girl.” His comment pissed me off.

“She’s not just some girl,” I said, feeling more irritated than I was five minutes ago. “You don’t have to worry about it anymore because I’m moving.”

“What?” Lance, who was on the other side of me, interjected.

“Just give me some time to find an apartment and I’ll be gone.” I didn’t wait for either of them to argue. There was no way I could stay in the same house as Todd and not end up killing him.

Chapter Nineteen

Payton

“Where are you?” Dylan’s clipped tone was the first thing I heard when I answered my phone. Not a hello, or I miss you.

“At the mall with Casey. She woke me up early and asked me to go. You were sleeping soundly and I didn’t see the point in waking you up.”

“It would have been nice to know where you were. It would have made things a whole hell of a lot easier.” He sure woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Very rarely did Dylan come off so angry and irritable.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“No, I’m not okay. I’m two seconds from going back out to the kitchen and finishing off that fucking asshole Todd.” I heard the sound of things banging around and it made me nervous.

“What happened with Todd?” I almost didn’t ask because I knew he was already in a bad mood, but I had to know.

“His fucking comments about you were too much this time. I’m tired of sitting around while he runs his mouth.” His tone only grew more agitated.

“I’m not sure what happened, but why are you so angry with me?” Casey was up ahead of me searching through a rack of jeans. She was completely oblivious to my current conversation.

Dylan let out a long exasperated breath and I leaned back against the wall just a few feet away. His mood had taken a somewhat peaceful day and turned me into a ball of nerves.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said.

Instead of replying I chose to wait for a better explanation from him.

“I didn’t like waking up without you. Todd saw that I was having a bad morning and decided to take it to a new level.” Another silence set over us. I looked up, watching Casey throw one thing after another over her arm and I smiled to myself. Before long she would not be able to fit in to those clothes.

“I’m moving out of the house,” Dylan added, and it brought my attention back to him.

“What?” I asked.

“I can’t stay here with him. It is just a disaster in the making. After our fight today, the guys are all in an uproar. It would be easier if I just moved out.” The banging around from earlier had stopped. “I want you to move in with me.”

“I…what?” I was thrown off by his offer. “I mean, you…it’s just that…” I couldn’t form a complete sentence. That was the last thing I expected him to say.

“We can talk more about it later. I still have to look for a place. How long do you think you’ll be?”

“I don’t know.” That was the truth; with Casey it could be hours.

“I need to get out of here anyway. Maybe I’ll just meet up with you two.” I was nodding my head as if he could actually see me. “Payton?”

“Um, yeah,” I stopped nodding and finally spoke. “Sure.”

***

Dylan: I’m here, where are you guys?

With Dylan’s text, my stomach grew even more uneasy. After our conversation earlier I wasn’t sure what mood he would be in.

I filled both Casey and Seth in on the morning’s events, but Seth already knew and didn’t seem surprised that it happened in the first place. He then proceeded to tell us all about the other times Todd and Dylan had gotten into it with each other.

Me: The food court, Seth needed to eat.

My stomach flipped when I placed my phone on the table and began looking around.

As I scanned the food court a feeling of being watched sent chills through my body. I was having that feeling a lot lately, and I thought it had to do with the letter from John. On most days since I found out he was released from prison, I was always looking over my shoulder.

But nothing looked out of the ordinary. There were families, couples, and even a few people sitting alone, reading the paper or talking on their phones. Nothing seemed unusual.

One woman with a young boy seemed familiar, as though I had already seen them in a few of the stores we visited, yet her back was to me. Long dark hair, almost the same shade as mine, was piled in a messy bun on top of her head. The few strands that had escaped curled down her back as she knelt in front of the younger boy.

The chair to my left squeaked against the floor and I jumped in surprise as Dylan sat down beside me.

“Heard you fucked him up good this time,” Seth said to Dylan, but he didn’t reply. He only slid his chair closer to mine and reached up to wrap his hand around the back of my neck, pulling me closer. His lips skimmed mine before kissing me gently.

“I’m sorry I was an asshole,” he whispered before kissing me once more.

“I know, it’s okay,” I assured him as he rested his forehead against mine. We remained that way for a few seconds before Casey broke into our moment.

“Your eye looks awful.”

Pulling back away from him I scanned over his face, and for the first time since I left this morning I got a good look at him. He had a cut above his left eye, and the bruise surrounding it was already changing to a dark purple. The cut on his lip had scabbed over. “Dylan,” I whispered as my fingertip traced his lip.

He lifted his hand and took mine in his, lifting it to his lips. “It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt.”

That did not make me feel any better. The fight was because of me and I felt like I caused it. Even though from the beginning I had never been anything but honest with Todd, he took our friendship and tried to make it more. He knew how I felt about Dylan, yet he had tried more than once to convince me to forget about him. Now there were unsettled feelings within the fraternity and it was all my fault.

The guys spent the next ten minutes going over what happened and I nervously toyed with the hem of my shirt. A habit I had picked up during therapy now filtered over into my everyday life.

“You okay?” Dylan asked, and my body jerked in surprise. My head whipped in his direction and I nodded.

I could tell by his expression he didn’t believe me. “Really, I’m fine,” I assured him once more. “I’m gonna run to the restroom.”

“I can walk you.” He started to get up and I stopped him by placing my hand on his thigh. “It’s twenty feet away, down a hall. I think I can manage.”

Before he could argue I gave him a kiss and hurried off.

Just as I was turning down the hall I looked over my shoulder and saw the same woman from earlier staring at me. Something seemed so familiar about her. Again that uneasy feeling washed over me and chills covered my arms.

Rushing toward the bathroom I splashed cool water on my face and took a few minutes to calm my nerves. I had no idea what the hell was wrong with me. I suddenly felt like I was barely hanging on. My hands shook, my stomach tightened, and my head pounded.

The sound of a toilet flushing made my heart lurch.

“Jesus, pull it together,” I whispered to myself as I ripped the paper towels from the dispenser. I was being ridiculous. I had nothing to be worked up over. I was being paranoid.

An older woman stepped out of the stall and smiled politely as she stepped up at my side. I backed away from the sink and tossed the paper towel in the garbage before exiting the bathroom, still feeling like I was losing my mind.

Obviously not paying attention, I collided with someone and we both stumbled before bracing ourselves using the wall. “I am so sorry,” I said as I reached out to make sure she was okay. “I wasn’t watching where I was going. Are you…” I stopped speaking when I saw who it was I ran in to.

It was the woman from earlier, the one I felt like I knew from somewhere. “It’s okay.” She replied with a smile, and my heart sank. It was as if time had begun to move in slow motion. That smile…I had seen it before. A smile from when I was younger and the world felt like the cruelest place; that sweet smile that always gave me hope. It helped me get rid of the bad dreams and was one of the very few things that made me feel safe.

Movement from her left caught my attention, and when I looked at the small boy I gasped. If I had to guess, he would be around eight or nine. His eyes shone with a bright green that I recognized as my own. They were the same as my father’s. Reality hit me hard and I backed away from them both, shaking my head from side to side, suddenly feeling a panic rush through me.

“No,” I whispered, and I felt for the wall behind me to brace myself from slipping toward the floor.

She took a step toward me and held out her hand. “Payton,” she said in a calm whisper.

A sea of emotions ran through me. Shock, fear, overwhelming anger. I couldn't believe this was real. After almost ten years? How could she be here standing in front of me with this little boy, this little boy who looked like my father? Who looked like me?

“Maggie?” I whispered in disbelief.

“Yeah,” she said in response.

We both stood there in the hallway staring at one another.

I had no idea what to say, what to think. My mind was a blank.

The young boy stepped closer, and my gaze shifted between the two of them over and over. Questions I couldn’t ask flooded.

“Cooper, I’d like you to meet your sister, Payton.” Maggie’s words were the last thing I remembered as I slid down the wall and gave in to the overwhelming anxiety.