Emily Post's Great Get-Togethers (19 page)
Read Emily Post's Great Get-Togethers Online
Authors: Anna Post
Note:
For biscuits with pretty golden tops, brush them with about ¼ cup buttermilk after they have been cut out. The biscuits can be prepared up to 1 week ahead and frozen. Arrange unbaked biscuits on a sheet pan and freeze. Store the frozen biscuits in a plastic freezer bag. Two hours before baking, remove the biscuits from the freezer, arrange them on a sheet pan, and thaw them in the refrigerator. You can bake them frozen—they just might take a little longer. Use the thawed biscuits to top the Chicken Cobbler.
Birthdays for Grown-ups
F
unny, we all loved our birthdays...until a certain age. Then it somehow became more fun to celebrate someone else’s birthday instead. No matter someone’s age, birthdays are a great excuse for a party, so celebrate every birthday you can! The big ones—the 5s and the 0s—get the most attention, usually with a cocktail party or dinner party. But we like celebrating the not-so-important years, too, usually by going out to brunch, lunch, or dinner with a group of friends and treating the birthday boy or girl.
birthday party hosting tips
- Consult the honoree about the guest list.
- It’s understood that guests are supposed to bring gifts to a birthday party unless you specify “No gifts, please” on your invitation.
- Phone, e-mail, or mail invitations at least 2 to 3 weeks ahead.
- Bake or order a cake or cupcakes (or other cakeworthy equivalent) and buy birthday candles.
- Have Champagne, sparkling wine, and sparkling water on hand for toasts.
Surprise!
There’s nothing like a successful surprise party. There’s a shared sense of purpose— and fun—between guests and host that brings people together long before the event. To plan one you have to be a little devious at heart, as well as quick on your feet if the “surprisee” starts to get suspicious. A few guidelines for would-be surprisers:
*Make sure you have a willing victim—some people just don’t like being surprised.
*Send the surprisee a fake invite for a similar event in the same time slot so she knows what to wear.
*Hold the party a week or more
ahead
of the surprisee’s actual birthday.
*Ask guests to arrive a half-hour before the honoree is due to show and make sure they know it’s a surprise!
*Park cars on another block.
*Try to act normally and casually and, whatever you do,
don’t spill the beans
.
Anna’s birthday lunch
Anna’s birthday is in June, when the garden is a riot of peonies and local strawberries are just appearing. If it’s nice weather, we’ll dine in the garden. Otherwise, we re-create the garden indoors, with peonies on the table and throughout the house.
Elderflower Mimosas
(page 109)
Louise’s Spring Pea Soup
(page 145)
Curried Cashew Chicken on Bibb Lettuce
(opposite)
Whole Grain Toasts
Birthday Cake or Buttermilk Feather Cake with Nutmeg
(page 85)
Whole Strawberries
Curried Cashew Chicken
Serves 4 as a main-course salad
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 tablespoon kosher salt
2 tablespoons good-quality fresh curry powder
1 cup roughly chopped toasted cashews
¼ cup roughly chopped raisins or currants
1/3 cup full-fat yogurt, preferably Greek yogurt
¼ cup roughly chopped fresh cilantro
¼ cup finely sliced scallions
Juice of ½ lemon
- Preheat the oven to 350°F.
- Rub the chicken with the salt, then rub in all of the curry powder. Place on a lightly oiled or parchment-lined baking sheet pan and bake until just cooked through (160°F), 10 to 15 minutes. Let cool to room temperature. Cut the chicken into ¼-inch dice, and, in a medium bowl, mix in the remaining ingredients. This may be done up to 24 hours in advance.
- To serve as a
salad
, place ½ cup or more of the chicken on a bed of butter lettuce. Garnish with cucumber slices, slices of peeled orange, additional cashews and raisins, or any combination of the above. - To serve as an
appetizer
, serve on crostini or in
cucumber cups
. To make cucumber cups, peel lengthwise stripes into the skin of a hothouse or English cucumber. Cut crosswise into ½-inch-thick slices. Using a small spoon or melon baller, hollow out the shallow center of each slice, being careful not to scoop through to the other side. Lightly salt each cup and fill with several teaspoons of chicken salad. Garnish with plucked cilantro or chopped scallions.
Showers
W
hether they’re held to honor a new baby or a bride, showers are a lovely tradition. Friends and family of the happy couple or the expectant parents literally shower them with gifts for their new home or child. Showers range from simple and casual to elaborate—and while they were once for girls only, these days guys are often included as well. They’re meant to be adaptable to busy schedules, and can be held almost any time of day—even after dinner. Anyone can host a shower, but guests should be limited to family and close friends of the honoree. Most baby showers are held a month or so before the mom’s due date, although some people prefer to wait until after the baby’s safe arrival.
Wedding and baby showers usually last 1½ to 2½ hours, enough time for refreshments, gift opening, and perhaps games. Match the food to the time of day, but lighter fare is the norm. The gift opening is the main event, with everyone oohing and aahing as each present is unwrapped. Some honorees find it overwhelming to be the center of so much attention, so it’s fine to stagger the gift opening with refreshments, a game, or conversation. As for the refreshments, you may opt to skip alcohol if it’s a daytime event. Serve iced tea or lemonade, or make punch or spritzers with a pretty fruit garnish. Nuts, crudités, and little tea sandwiches make a great start and cookies or cake a lovely finish. Cupcakes, whether homemade or store-bought, offer room for lots of creativity with the frosting.
Thoughtful Showers
All first time parents—couples, single, or adopting—can benefit from a shower to help welcome the new addition to their family. It’s okay to have showers for second and even third children, but be sensitive and limit the guest list to family, close friends, and new friends—you don’t want to overtax anyone’s generosity.
Shower Invite Smarts
- Consult with the honoree(s) about the guest list.
- Send out invitations 4 to 6 weeks ahead of the party. Shower invites are usually mailed, but e-vites and even phone invitations are fine.
- Include the honoree’s name, the date and time, where the shower’s being held, and RSVP contact info.
- Add directions to the host’s house.
- For a wedding shower, list the theme: kitchen, bar, lingerie, monogram. For a baby shower, list nursery colors or
boy
or
girl
if known. - Never, never, never put specific gift requests or registry information on the invitation!
You always want to keep the focus on the people, not the gifts. Since showers are a gift occasion, it’s fine to include a separate note with registry info. As the host, keep a list of what the honoree might need or like, and share it with guests who inquire when they RSVP.
Saying Thanks
All wedding and baby shower gifts must be acknowledged with a thank-you note, even if the honoree thanked the participants in person. You can help your honoree by:
- Asking a guest to be a recorder, writing down each gift as it’s opened, along with a short description (“onesie” alone won’t give her a clue whether Aunt Christine gave her the pink one or the blue) and the name of the giver. This list is critical, especially if a card gets separated from a gift.
- Providing her with names and addresses of all the guests. Note: It’s tacky to have guests preaddress their own thank-you notes, no matter how “efficient” that might seem. A handwritten note is a handwritten note, envelope and all.
Welcome!
C
elebrate your new or renovated house or apartment with a housewarming party for friends and neighbors. Plan to spend time giving tours, unless you’re comfortable letting your guests explore on their own. Needless to say, everything—even closets—should be in tip-top shape. People’s curiosity knows no bounds, and at a housewarming it’s considered fair game to look anywhere and everywhere. (Items such as bills, prescriptions, and underwear should be out of sight—for everyone’s sake!) If you’re planning on being the tour guide, designate a partner or friend to greet guests at the door.
A housewarming is often a cocktail party or cocktail buffet, as simple or as elaborate as you wish. Or it can be “Drop by for minestrone, bread, and salad on Sunday afternoon.” Phoned, e-mailed, or informal written invitations all work well for this kind of event, but be sure to issue them two to three weeks ahead. Because a housewarming is similar to an open house, add a start and end time to your invitation. Three to four hours is a typical time frame, with guests coming and going. If you’re inviting a small group, include only a start time and expect the party to last two to three hours.
Presents for You
It’s traditional for guests to bring gifts to celebrate your new digs, a birthday, or an anniversary. If you have a small group and everyone brought a gift, open them at the party and thank the giver in person. Otherwise, save them to open later and send a thank-you note. By the way, rule or not, a thank-you note is always appreciated.
Happy Anniversary
Y
oung couples celebrate early anniversaries on their own or with a small cocktail or dinner party with friends. The guest list can include family members and their children, members of the couple’s wedding party, and friends.
Hosting Away from Home
Y
ou might decide to host certain parties—like a significant birthday or your parents’ anniversary—at a club or restaurant. There are definite advantages to this, especially if you’d like to invite more people than you can fit comfortably into your home, or if the honoree lives far away and you’re hosting the party in their town. If you do this, the one guideline you absolutely must follow is that you
cannot
ask your guests to help pay the bill.
(See Who Pays?, page 188.)
The key to a successful party away from home is to arrange everything with the club or restaurant manager ahead of time. Once you’ve secured your date and sent out invitations, meet the manager to discuss the menu and beverage options. If you have a cocktail hour you can either offer an open bar and run a tab, or offer a signature cocktail, wine, beer, and nonalcoholic options. It’s fine to select a red and a white wine to serve with dinner (and a Champagne or sparkling wine for toasts). You can either choose one meal that’s served to all, or create a mini menu from what the venue offers. This second option lets guests choose among a limited number of appetizers, entrées, and desserts. If all the items are in a similar price range, it makes it easy to stay within your budget while still offering choices. For a nice flourish, print your chosen menu on card stock and set the menus at each place setting so guests can check out their choices before the waitstaff takes orders (they make nice keepsakes, too!).
Who Pays?
You wouldn’t ask your guests to pay for dinner at your home, so don’t ask them to do so if your party’s held elsewhere. When you’re the host, you pick up the tab. Better to host a smaller or less elaborate party at home than risk insulting guests with an invitation asking them to pay $50 a head. Worse would be to invite guests simply to celebrate Tim’s birthday, say, and then—surprise!—expect them to split the bill when it arrives.
If a group decides to host the party together, then splitting the cost is fine—but everyone should agree on the concept and the details ahead of time. Invitations are then sent to the honoree(s) and any other guests (who, of course, are
not
required to pay anything). Include the names of all the hosts on the invitation, so guests know who to thank.
Group Gifts
A
popular idea these days is the group gift, where family and friends pool their resources for a big-ticket gift, like a baby stroller or an anniversary trip. While this is a fine idea in theory, group gifts can run into etiquette problems if they’re not handled carefully. A few tips to keep in mind when going this route:
- Remember, the choice of gift is always up to the giver. If someone chooses to opt out of a group gift in favor of giving something else, that’s her prerogative.
- Gift information should be on a separate enclosure with the invitation, not on the invitation itself.
- Refrain from asking people for a specific amount. Instead, be willing to accept (and keep anonymous) all contributions. Deliver the gift (or the check) with a card that includes the names of everyone who contributed, so the giftee can send a thank-you note to each person.
Giving Toasts
I
f you’re hosting a special occasion like a birthday or an anniversary, it’s your privilege, if you wish, to offer a toast to your guest of honor. No need to be intimidated: The best toasts are short and come from the heart. A simple “To Susie: May each birthday find you among good friends” will fit the bill. Or you can share reminiscences, tell a story, or speak to your guest of honor’s best qualities.
You don’t need a special occasion to make a toast, however. No matter what kind of party it is, if the mood is right, it’s lovely to give an informal toast to good friends around the table.
Toasting Tips
- At a dinner party, it’s the host or hostess’s prerogative to give the first toast.
- If the hosts don’t offer a toast, a guest may propose a toast saluting the hosts.
- Typically, toasts are proposed as soon as wine or Champagne is served—usually at the beginning of the meal or just before dessert.
- The person proposing the toast stands or raises a glass and gathers everyone’s attention before launching into the toast itself.
- At the conclusion of the toast, everyone except the honoree(s) stands or raises their glasses and drinks.
- The honoree doesn’t rise or drink the toast; instead he or she simply smiles, nods, and enjoys. After the toast or toasts are drunk, the honoree rises and drinks to his or her toasters in return with a “Thank you” or his or her own toast.
- No need for everyone to drain their glasses during a toast—a sip will do just fine.
- You don’t need an alcoholic beverage to propose or drink to a toast. Any liquid will do, but we think it’s more fun if the drink is something bubbly: Champagne, sparkling wine, sparkling water, fruit juice spritzers, or ginger ale.
(See Chapter 8, Delicious Drinks, page 95, for more on Champagne and sparkling wine.)