Everything (18 page)

Chapter Thirty-Five

Jody

The Child Services interview was brutal. She questioned me on everything, not letting up until she was sure I wasn’t abusing my daughter. It didn’t stop her from making me feel like a piece of dirt for leaving Angel unchecked for so long, though.

“I realize being a single mother is hard work. It’s tiring and relentless, but you cannot afford to put your child at risk like this again. If you’re struggling, you need to get yourself some support.”

I nodded, fear curling through me at the idea of leaving my family support network and flying to the other side of the country. What if Angel fell in New York? Who would I call to help me? If Leo was out of reach, I’d be all alone.

“Who brought you to the emergency room today?”

“My father,” I croaked, my forehead crinkling. Why had he been calling me?

“Good, I’m glad you have family close by. Use them, get their help. Most are more than willing if you’ll just ask.”

I nodded again, unable to meet her stern gaze.

“Jody, from what Doctor Johnson told me, you obviously love your daughter. I can see you’re young and she probably wasn’t planned, but you’ve chosen to keep her, and you need to take that seriously. Children must come first until they are able to look after themselves.”

Her eyebrow peaked high, reminding me of my strict math teacher from twelfth grade. Man, I’d hated her.

The social worker’s words drove into me, feeling like nettles. My conscience burned, charring my insides and making me feel ill. If I hadn’t been lost in the song, the music... If I hadn’t let my yearning for the stage take hold, Angel never would have gotten hurt.

“I’ll never play the piano again, I swear.”

“That’s a little drastic.” She sniffed out a dry laugh. “Look, we all know accidents happen, but you do need to ask yourself what you could have done differently to avoid this one.” The lady patted my arm, her stern reprimand giving way to a sympathetic smile.

“I know exactly what I could have done differently.” I shook my head, loathing myself, right down to my core.

She rose from her chair and I followed suit, tugging my bloodstained shirt straight.

“I won’t ever let it happen again.”

“I feel confident of that.” She hugged her paperwork to her chest, her smile growing with warmth.

My lips wobbled when I tried to smile back.

“Go and see your baby. I’ve arranged to have a bed set up in the room so you can stay with her for the night.”

“Thank you.”

She opened the door for me, and I listened to the squeak of my shoes on the hospital floor as I made my way up to Angel’s room. Dad had stayed with her, much to my relief. I hadn’t wanted him sitting in on my shameful interview. The fact I’d even had to have it made me want to curl into a ball and die.

Popping out from the elevator, I slowed my pace, checking room numbers as I followed the directions I’d been given. The pediatrics floor was filled with sounds of crying babies and bustling nurses. I made my way down to the end of the corridor and found Angel’s room.

Peeking my head inside, I swallowed back my greeting, too enraptured by the sight before me to speak. Ella and Morgan were leaning against the hospital bed, holding hands and watching my dad.

He was holding Angel, kissing the tips of her fingers as he gently swayed around the room singing, “The Way You Do The Things You Do.” She gazed up at him, her blue eyes sparkling in spite of the deep bruise marring her milky skin.

A rush of memories came flooding over me, Dad humming to me as we walked down the street or danced around the kitchen doing the dishes.

I sucked in a breath, my face bunching. Whenever he’d sung to me like that, I knew without a doubt that he loved me—I’d felt it in my soul.

And there he was, singing to Angel while my sister and best friend sat waiting for me...waiting to wrap me in their arms and tell me everything would be okay. Waiting to assure me that I was still a good person and they loved me, no matter what I did.

They loved me.

And Dad, he loved my baby girl.

Watching them dance together filled me with such a sense of...

“Home,” I whispered.

Closing my eyes, I felt the tears cascading over my cheeks. I knew what I had to do. I knew what my heart was telling me, and all of a sudden it hurt to breathe.

Chapter Thirty-Six

Leo

I pressed the lift button three times, eager to get upstairs. I’d had such a brilliant day and couldn’t wait to tell Jody all about it. Thanks to Bobby’s contact and his genius sound tech, I now had the full compositions for “I Want the World” and “Dream Chaser” finished. He’d helped me tweak the finer details, and I’d been able to hand over a full score of music for both those songs. I wanted to be as prepared for the audition as possible. I knew they would want to make changes, but I figured the more prepared I was, the more professional I’d look and the greater the chance of actually getting a say in how this musical was presented.

Pulling out my phone, I checked the screen, realizing I’d totally forgotten about it. I’d missed a call from Jody but was about to walk through her door anyway.

With a grin, I slide the phone away and walked straight into her place.

“Jo, you’re not going to believe my day. Sorry I missed your call, but—”

My voice cut short when I looked up and found Marshall in the kitchen with a mop in his hand. He was wearing his usual grumpy expression, and it instantly made me uneasy.

“Hi, Mr. Pritchett. Um, where’s Jody?”

His lips pursed, his brown gaze still drilling into me. I gripped the door handle.

“She’s at the hospital,” he finally muttered.

Fear ripped through me. “What?”

He didn’t say more, just turned back to his mopping. Lurching into the apartment, I came around the kitchen counter, ready to grab his shirt and demand he tell me more, but then I saw the red, watery marks on the floor, and my anger was railroaded by a sickening terror.

“Oh, shit, what happened?” My mind jumped to all sorts of nasty conclusions, making it hard to see straight. The last time I’d felt this scared, I’d been listening to Deb on the phone; she was crying and telling me my brother had just had a heart attack.

Marshall wouldn’t meet my horrified gaze, just kept washing away the blood.

“Tell me she’s okay.” My voice shook. I sucked in a ragged breath and he looked up at me, his expression softening with surprise.

“You’re really worried about her?”

“Of course I bloody am!” I yanked the beanie off my head, tempting to throw it at him. This guy was unbelievable! “You’re mopping blood off her kitchen floor!”

I felt sick. Leaning over, I rested my hands against my knees, gasping in mouthfuls of air in an attempt to regulate my heartbeat. “Look, mate, I know you don’t like me, but I really couldn’t give a flying fuck right now.” I stood tall, my shaking voice stealing my thunder. “I love your daughter...and your granddaughter! Now, tell me where the hell they are!”

Marshall swallowed, gripping the mop in his hand and pulling in a slow sigh. “Angel had a fall today.”

“Angel,” I whispered the word, a newfound panic sizzling in my gut. Tears glassed over my eyes before I could even stop them. Not my sweet little girl. “How bad is it?”

I didn’t want to hear the answer, but at the same time, I
needed
to know.

“She cut her chin open and bit her tongue. She’s in the hospital overnight. Jody’s with her.”

I pulled on my beanie and was walking for the door before he’d even finished. “Where? Which hospital!”

Pausing at the door, I spun to face him, desperation making my movements emphatic.

Marshall’s hesitation made me want to rip his bloody head off. 

“Please!” I thumped the door, making it swing open and smack against the doorstop.

He looked to the floor, a slow smile forming on his lips as he nodded...and then gave me detailed directions.

*****

Visiting hours were over, but I lied my way through, claiming I was Angel’s father. The nurse at reception bought my lie easily, probably because I said it with such conviction. I loved that little girl like she was my own, and the idea of her going through trauma near killed me.

The lift moved like a grandpa snail but finally pinged open on the fourth floor. I raced down to the right room, slowing to catch my breath when I spotted Jody in the chair beside Angel’s cot, holding her daughter’s little fingers through the bars. She looked ready to shatter.

“Hey,” I whispered, stepping softly into the room so as not to disturb the other patient behind the curtain.

Jody’s smile was sad, her eyes glistening as I stopped at the end of the bed.

“Hey, Leo.” Ella smiled up at me from the other side. She was obviously tired, but it did nothing to hinder the sweet expression on her face.

I gave her a little nod of recognition.

Clearing her throat softly, she stood from her chair. “I’m gonna go and get some coffee.”

“No.” Jody shook her head. “Ella, go home. Angel’s asleep now and I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Thank you for staying for so long.”

“Of course, Jo-Jo. I’m always here for you.” She moved around me, placing a kiss on the top of Jo’s head before squeezing my arm and leaving.

My sigh was slow and heavy as I gazed into the cot. Angel’s chin was bandaged up, but it didn’t hide the purple bruising around her mouth. My gut twisted in agony, feeling her pain as if it were my own.

“Geez, Jo, I’m so sorry I wasn’t there today. I didn’t even hear my phone ring.”

She shook her head, her lips forming a wobbly line as she blinked at fresh tears.

I moved to her side, rubbing the back of her neck and crouching down beside her. “You doing okay?”

Her teeth pinched her lips together. Shaking her head, she turned away from me.

“Hey,” I whispered, resting my forehead against her cheek. “She’s okay.”

“I should have been watching her.”

“Accidents happen.”

“This one didn’t have to. I was careless. I left her playing in the living room while I practiced at your piano. I’d blocked off the stairs and left the doors open, but...” She shook her head. “It wasn’t good enough. I screwed up.”

“Jo, you can’t be too hard on yourself. You—”

“Stop.” Her eyes hit mine, blue and vibrant, even in the dim lamplight. “I was wrong today, don’t try and tone it down. My daughter ended up in the hospital and has stitches in her face, because I left her for too long.” She licked at the tear running down the edge of her mouth, her gaze shifting back to Angel’s face. “We can’t go with you to New York, Leo.”

“What?” My face bunched with a frown.

Her curls rustled over her shoulders as her head shook yet again. “I couldn’t reach you today, and my dad ended up taking us to the hospital. I can’t move to the other side of the country to pursue a dream that will put Angel at risk.”

I licked my bottom lip, telling myself to think about where she was coming from, but I couldn’t. She was being illogical, letting her tattered emotions rule this decision.

“Jo, this was a one-off freak accident. It’ll probably never happen again.”

“But what if it does, or something else?” She sucked in a quick breath. “I need my family around me, Leo. I need the support. I made the decision to keep her. I can’t just run off and start pursuing the stage and forget that I have a one-year-old I’m responsible for.”

“We’ll find care for her in New York. We’ll make it work.”

“Would you stop saying that!” She slapped her leg, finally turning to face me properly. “What if we can’t make it work?”

I opened my mouth, but she cut me off before I could speak.

“I know what it’s like to be abandoned and yes, Angel is only one, but I would rather die than have her go through what I did. I want her to know without a doubt that her mommy loves her and that she’s more important than anything. I can’t pursue the stage right now, Leo. Angel needs me to be her mother and that’s it. I have to think about what’s best for her...and moving miles away from people who love and support me is not what’s best for her!”

I picked up Jody’s fingers, squeezing them between mine as I tried to bring my raging emotions into check. Damn, it hurt. I didn’t want to give up New York, but there was no way I’d be able to change Jody’s mind after an argument like that.

“Okay,” I sighed. “Okay, so I’ll shop the musical around here then. There’s bound to be someone in LA who’ll be interested, right?”

“Leo, you can’t.” She rubbed her thumb over my knuckles. “You have to go and take this chance.”

“I don’t want to go to New York without you.”

“You have to. This is what you want. This is what you’ve been working so hard for.”

“But I love you, Jo.”

Her expression folded, her lips trembling as she sucked in a breath. “I love you, too, which is why I have to let you do this.” Pulling her hand free of my grasp, she swiped at her tears. “I’ll feel guilty for the rest of my life if I hold you back. This is why you came to the States. This is everything you want.”

“Not everything,” I mumbled.

“Leo, you’ll regret it. If you pass this up, you’ll regret it, and I don’t want that to hinder us. I don’t want it to be something that you’ll hold against me on some subconscious level. You
have
to go.”

“No, actually, I don’t. It’s my decision.”

Jody’s face bunched with a mixture of agony and frustration. “You don’t know what you’re saying! You don’t know what it’s like to have a dream ripped out of your hands. I don’t want that for you.”

“I don’t want to do this without you!” My voice was growing tight and strained. Did she honestly not get it?

“You are going!”

My eyes narrowed; I couldn’t help glaring at her just a little. My hackles rose whenever anybody ordered me around like that. “And what if I stay?”

“Then we’re through. I’m not letting you give everything up for me.” Crossing her arms she slumped back in her chair and wouldn’t look my way.

Damn if that didn’t rip me in half.

I wanted to stand up and yell in her face, tell her she couldn’t boss me around, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it, because what if she was right?

Unable to speak past that thick swell of emotion in my throat, I leaned forward and took her face between my hands, rubbing my thumb gently across her lips. They trembled beneath my touch, and I placed my lips against them. She kissed me back, her body quivering.

When I pulled away, she wrapped her arms around my neck, squeezing until I thought the circulation might be cut off. I gripped her to me, never wanting to let go. A new argument for New York formed on my lips, but I couldn’t make it.

In that moment, it didn’t matter if I thought we could overcome the odds, she didn’t...and I could tell that nothing I said or did would convince her otherwise.

She was staying to be the best mother she could be.

I left about an hour later. We didn’t say much to each other, just sat and watched Angel sleeping. I drove home in a daze and arrived back to an empty, soulless apartment. Marshall had left Jody’s place; I could tell by the lack of light coming from under the door.

Slamming my own door shut behind me, I leaned against the wood, feeling like a tattered wreck. All the excitement of my journey across the country had been shattered by Angel’s accident and Jody’s decision.

Throwing my keys on the counter, I headed for the piano.

My rough sheet music for “Dream Chaser” was still on the stand. Jody must have been working on that one. She knew how much I wanted it to shine. She’d been working for me.

Damn, I wanted her to sing it so bad.

Ripping off my beanie, I threw it over my shoulder and slumped onto the stool. The keys let out a disjointed groan as I leaned my elbows against the keyboard and rested my head in my palms.

It wouldn’t be the same without her.

She turned my dream into sunlight. She made it bigger, better, more perfect. She enhanced every note, every beat...she made it everything I couldn’t on my own.

Jerking back in my seat, I placed my fingers on the keys and played an E-flat chord, my fingers fiddling with it as I tested out a few variations and chord combos. Closing my eyes, I let my fingers take control, ridding my body of the myriad of emotions. They swirled into the room, a cacophony of sounds that slowly started to take shape and become a mournful tune...a pointless argument that could not be resolved...an everything dream that was no longer coming true.