Face the Music (55 page)

She filled me in on the details.  They were going to see a movie and have dinner on Friday
night. 

“Are you sure it’s okay
?” she asked anxiously.  “It won’t be weird for you, us dating, will it?”

I gave her a reassuring smile.  “Why would it be weird?  Go and have a good time.  I’ll stay with Mol
ly.”

I didn’t hear Emily come in that night, so I got the earful the next morning.  “He is so cute!  I always thought he
was boyishly charming, but he’
s really something, isn’t he?  And he’s funny…” she went on for awhile longer, and I pretended to listen.  I was glad she was happy, but it was hard for me to hear.  I missed having those feelings.

The next week I learned that the producers of the show were planning to host a series of celebrity g
uest judges.  I scanned the list,
the blood drain
ing
from my face when I saw Chris’s name.  He was scheduled
for
the
last week of October.

I made a mental note to be sick those days.  I had finally gotten myself to a point where I could look at pictures of him without
reducing
to
tears
, but I certainly didn’t want to push my luck and risk running into him in person.  I wasn’t sure I could handle that.

***

That dreaded week finally came, but I had not managed to catch any serious illnesses.  I chose to hide in my classroom and avoid the common areas of the studio in order to
keep from
seeing him.  Arriving at my classroom just a few minutes before I was supposed to be there, I taught with the door closed and left as soon as the kids were gone. 

I was walking down the hall
Friday
afternoon, anxious to leave, when I heard Chris’s voice.  He was in Mr. Doveland’s office.  I tried to remain unnoticed as I dashed past the open door.

“Allison, do you have a moment?”  Mr. Doveland poked his head out and looked at me expectantly.  I stood there for a second, trying to think of an escape, but came
up with nothing
.  I soon found myself face to face with Chris. 

He gave a polite smile and looked me over, but I couldn’t read anything from his restrained expression.  I avoided meeting his eyes and nervously fidgeted with my charm bracelet as Mr. Doveland
updated me on the schedule
.

“…so the kids won’t be in class tomorrow morning since they’ll be working with Chris.  That won’t be a problem, will it?”

I kept my eyes down and shook my head.  “N
ope.”  This was his show.  H
e made the rules and signed my paycheck.  Far be it for me to have a problem with something he wanted to do.

“Great. 
Thanks, Allison.”  He dismissed me.

“Thank you, sir,” I said before turning to go.  Being so
close to Chris was suffocating. 
I was desperate to leave.

“Bye, Allie.”  

I turned and looked up into Chris’s perfect face and was struck by how handsome he was.  It had been such a long time since I’d seen him in person.  A stabbing pain
ripped at
my insides. 

“Bye, Chris.  Good to see you.”  I took two steps out of the room and then turned back.  “Thanks for the birthday present, by the way.  That was really nice.  You didn’t have to do that.”

He flashed me a dazzling smile, but I caught a glimpse of sadness behind his dark eyes.  “Actually, I did.  It’s the law, you know.”

I tore my eyes away from his and hurried away, rushing into the nearest restroom and nearly collapsing on the counter.  All the feelings I had worked so hard to repress had resurfaced.  My knees were weak.  My hands were shaking.  My throat was dry, and my heart pounded violently against my ribcage.  I looked at my wretched image in the mirror and tried very hard to recollect myself.  How was I supposed to live my life if I couldn’t stand to be in the same room with the guy?

Jake stopped me
before I made it outside
.
 
He was telling me about his date with Emily.
 

I shook my head and covered my ears.  “Stop!  I really don’t need to hear about this.” 

When I looked past Jake, I saw that
Chris was
coming
down the hall.  The room started to spin, and I felt like I was going to be sick.

Jake put his hands on my shoulders and leaned his head forward so that we were e
ye-level.  “What’s going on?”

I shook my head again.  “Nothing!  I just don’t want to hear about you and my little sister.  Sorry, I gotta go!”

I felt both sets of eyes on me as I rushed from the building.

***

Emily still worked most Monday nights, so Molly and I snuggled on the couch to watch the show.  Chris was a guest judge.  It would have been less painful for me to find something else to watch, but I was curious to see him.

He was sincere in his efforts to give the contestants real, genuine criticism.  He commented on their song choices and delivery, and then wowed the crowd with his own amazing performance.  As always, he was stunning, and I couldn’t take my eyes off him.  He received a standing ovation and praise from the judges, and then flashed a gorgeous smile into the camera. 

My heart melted
.  I couldn’t stand it anymore. 
I thought I was losing my mind.

Just as I was questioning my sanity, the phone rang. 

“Hey Allie!  What’s up?”  It was Charlie, the guy from school who I’d sat by at the baseball game. 

Aside from occasional class discussions, we really didn’t talk that much.  I
wondered how
he
got
my number.  “Hey!  What’s going on?”

“Have you heard about Thursday night’s benefit concert?”

“Yeah,” I said, still looking at the TV.  “Some of last year’s Stars are getting together for a reunion.  All the proceeds go to a children’s charity.”

He cleared his throat.  “Are you going?”

“I hadn’t planned on it, why?”

“Do you want to?”

My immediate reaction was to decline, but I rationalized that I had to come to terms with this.  Chris Knots would always be out there in the public eye.  I couldn’t avoid seeing him- Lord knew I had tried.  And Charlie was really a nice guy.  What could it hurt?  It was for a good cause, after all. 

“Alright, Charlie.  I’m in.  What time?”

***

I listened to the thunder as I got dressed for the concert.   The wind was gusty and the
dark sky threatened rain.  I’d
always loved a good thunderstorm; they put an electricity in the air that I found refreshing. 
Although
,
I wasn’t sure how conducive it was goi
ng to be for an outdoor concert
. 

Charlie knocked on the door at six, and we went down to load into a cab before heading off to Millennium Park. 

It didn’t take long to get there, and I was thrilled when I saw the kids’ faces on the banner outside the front gates.  Sam, Melody, Riley- all of them were there.

Charlie was paying for our tickets.  “Wait!”  I nudged closer to the window.  “Here, I can get mine.”

He pushed my hand away. “No way, my treat tonight.”

“Really, Charlie, take this.”  I slid a twenty dollar bill to him, but he wouldn’t take it. 
“At least let me get the snacks?
”

Since it was an o
utdoor event, seating was first-
come
, first-
serve, and
,
fortunately
,
Charlie had thought to bring a blanket for us to sit on.  We found a good spot, got settled, and I took off in search of drinks, leaving Charlie to guard our spot.

I didn’t get too far when I noticed a group of people pointing and whispering.  I followed their stares and saw Sam. 

“Sam!” I called loudly, nearly sprinting to him. 

“Hey!  Miss Banks!”  He flashed me a crooked grin
, and I gave him a hug
. 

“Please, call me Allie.  I’m hardly your teacher anymore.  How are you?”

He scratched his head and looked around as people scrambled to get out of the slight drizzle that had begun to fall.  “Great.  School sucks, but at least this is my last year.  Hey, I le
ft Riley and Melody backstage.  W
anna go say
‘
hi
’
and get out of this rain?”

Thunder boomed loudly, and we both looked up to the sky.  Dark clouds rolled overhead.

Sam walked with long strides towards the big stage, and I did my best to keep up with him.  “How long are you in town for?”

“Until Sunday.  The studio is hosting that Halloween party Saturday night, and we’re all supposed to be there.”  I remembered reading an email about a Masquerade ball, but
,
of course
,
I had no plans on going.  Chris would be there, and I couldn’t see the point of subjecting myself to that kind of torture.

Sam used his shoulder to force open a heavy
,
white door.  “Look who I found!” he announced as we stepped in out of the rain.  Melody, Riley, Jimmy, and Sabrina all looked up from a small TV.

“Oh my gosh!” I said, thrilled to see everyone.  “Hi!  How are you?”  I went around the room and gave them all a hug.

“Hi, Miss Banks!” said Riley. 

“We’re supposed to call her Allie now,” Sam told her.  “She says she’s not our teacher anymore.”

The girls outlined the agenda for the evening.  First, all
the
performers would come out for an opening act.  Then, each performer would sing a few solo songs, followed by Cynthia and Chris singing a duet.  The show would end with Chris again taking the stage and performing some of his latest singles.

My stomach twis
ted at the mention of his name. 
I then remembered Charlie.  “It’s so good to see you all,
” I told the kids,
“
but I have to get back.”

The
y
gave me bizarre looks as I headed towards the door. 

“Don’t you want to stay and watch the show from back here?” asked Sam, flashing a curious look to his friends.  “I know it’s not that great, but it’s at least dry.”

I was torn.  I wanted very much to stay and spend time with the kids, but I couldn’t just forget about Charlie.  “I’d love
to.  But I’m not exactly alone. 
I came with someone and left him waiting for me.”

“So?  G
o get him,” answered Riley.

I couldn’t help but smile at her.
  “T
hat’s sweet, but I really should get back.”

“But…”

Sam stepped forward.  “It was good to see you again!  Enjoy the show, and if you get a chance, you know where we’ll all be tonight!”

“Thanks!”  I gave each of my former students another quick hug
,
and then hurried out the door.  Melody
said something sarcastic to
Riley,
something
about Chris, but I didn’t stick around to hear it.