Feels Like Home (25 page)

My mother did.
Jo couldn't say the words out loud. Not even to Steph.

In the absence of a reply Steph continued. ‘Jo, she's a good little kid. I'm sure once you get to know each other a bit better …'

‘It's not her per se. Ella's a nice enough little kid, from what I've seen of her. But she's Ryan's kid, not mine.'

Carly's kid.

‘I don't want to be a step-mum. In fact I don't want to be a mum at all. That was one the issues between Zach and me. He wanted kids and I didn't.'

‘Jo, I didn't realise…' Steph's voice was quiet. ‘I always thought you'd make a great mum.'

‘Not everyone wants kids, Steph.'

Steph was quiet for a moment while she digested that statement. It seemed as if she'd never considered the fact before. ‘Okay, maybe not everybody does, but back to you and Ryan, who's to say if you get together that you have to be Ella's mum? You wouldn't necessarily have to live with her.'

‘What do you mean?'

‘If you and Ryan were to give it a go there's nothing to say you'd have to live together. You've got Yarrapinga and he's got the farm. You could move back home and just take it as it comes.'

This was not an option she'd considered. All her fantasies over the years had been of her and Ryan living and working together, waking up side by side. Conducting their relationship from two separate addresses wasn't part of the plan.

Steph took her silence as tacit agreement. ‘Ha! There you go. Problem solved.'

Jo slowly shook her head. ‘I don't know, Steph. I don't know if Ryan would go for that. I think eventually he'd want more. I think we both would.'

‘You should think about it, Jo. Kids grow up eventually. It seems silly to throw away what you and Ryan have without even trying.'

CHAPTER

25

After a long morning ride where she and Pepper had given each other a thorough workout, Jo figured she'd earned a cuppa. She guessed it wouldn't be too long before Steph called wanting to know if she'd had any more thoughts about her relationship with Ryan. She might as well grab herself a hot drink in preparation for the onslaught.

At first Steph's idea about coming home and living at Yarrapinga had seemed ludicrous. But then Ryan arrived at Nate's and smiled at her across the fire pit and her insides turned to mush. No other man had ever come close to making her feel the way Ryan did. Maybe it was worth giving Steph's idea some thought.

While the kettle boiled Jo stood at the sink and looked out the kitchen window. It was almost ten o'clock and yet the paddocks were still tinged white with frost. When she'd saddled up Pepper earlier she'd been reminded of her first winter in New York. One December morning she'd woken to find a blanket of snow had enveloped the city overnight, transforming the gritty streets into a magical fairyland. She was mesmerised by the sight and totally unprepared for the reality of living in it. Her fashionable black leather boots and thin woollen coat were no match for the sleet, snow and ice.

These days she was a pro, with a range of boots and coats for all conditions. This trip home she hadn't bothered to pack her warmest coat despite the fact that she was here in the middle of the Australian winter. Linden Gully's winters were mild compared to what she'd become accustomed to.

She crossed her fingers and said a quick prayer — more out of habit than any real belief — that her thoughts about Australia's mild winters wouldn't jinx the weather for Saturday. She wanted Steph's big day to be absolutely perfect.
Please God, no rain, no icy winds.

The sound of her phone trilling interrupted her thoughts. That would be the bride now, calling for her debrief.

Jo grabbed the phone off the kitchen counter and was pleasantly surprised to see Ryan's name on the screen.

‘Hey there, you. This is a nice surprise. I thought you were flat out at the clinic all day today.'

‘Yeah, I was, but things have changed.'

Jo's heart leapt. He'd cleared his schedule for her. ‘Great. Maybe we could —'

‘Sorry, Jo,' he cut in. ‘This is not a social call.'

‘Oh.' She hoped he couldn't hear the disappointment in her voice.

‘I'm really sorry to ask this but I need a favour.' There was no warmth in his voice. It was obvious something was wrong.

‘Is everything okay?'

‘I'm calling from the hospital in Belly. Mum's had a fall and we had to call the ambulance.'

‘Oh god, that's terrible. Will she be alright?'

‘I hope so, but the initial assessment from the doctor is that her hip's broken. She's in X-ray at the moment getting that confirmed. I'm not sure what will happen from here. I can't seem to find anyone who knows whether it means she'll have surgery today, but that would be my guess. The doctor will let me know once she's back from her scan. In any case I don't want to leave her on her own.'

‘I understand. How can I help?'

‘I need someone to pick Ella up from the bus and look after her until I get home. Normally I'd ask Steph or Nate or even Jenny but I know how busy they are this week.'

Jo winced. Babysitting was not something she excelled at. Ella was a nice enough little kid and they'd had fun together at the dress fitting — once the kid thawed out — but she wasn't sure she was ready to tackle a whole afternoon by herself with a child. How on earth would she entertain her? Or feed her? Jo realised she didn't have the first idea of what little kids ate. But Ryan was asking for her help. She could hardly refuse. ‘Um, I guess so…I mean, of course.'

‘Are you sure? You sound a little hesitant.'

‘I'm sure. Sorry I was just, um, a little distracted by a passing car.' Jo rolled her eyes at the pathetic excuse. She plastered a smile onto her face even though she knew Ryan couldn't see it and made an effort to sound more enthusiastic. ‘I'm happy to help. Where should I meet the bus?' She listened carefully as Ryan gave her directions to the bus stop and instructions for Ella's care for the rest of the evening.

Once the call ended Jo set about opening and closing every cupboard in the kitchen, in search of child-friendly food. Who was she trying to kid? There was barely any food at all, let alone anything exciting enough to tempt a six-year-old. She would have to head into town.

She pulled her phone out again and sent Steph a text.

Fingers crossed Steph would have a break in her endless schedule of pre-wedding jobs. Jo could use her advice on entertaining Ella. In fact, maybe she could even bribe Steph into giving her a hand this afternoon, just for an hour or so, to help her ease into the role.

Her phone vibrated with Steph's response.

So much for that idea. She'd have to sort this one out on her own.

At three-thirty, Jo carefully parked the Jeep on the verge of Longford Road as instructed by Ryan and waited for Ella's bus to come into view. She was ten minutes early. Being late wasn't an option. Ryan would never forgive her if she messed this up.

After a few tense minutes of wondering if she was in the right spot, the bus finally came into view. It rumbled to a stop just behind her Jeep and she heard the hiss and clatter of the door opening.

Ella gave her a shy smile as she jumped down the stairs. Jo smiled back and gave the bus driver a quick wave of acknowledgement as the door closed behind the child. ‘Hi Ella. I'm picking you up today.'

‘I know. My dad called the school to tell me. He wanted me to know because usually I'm not allowed to get in a car with a stranger.'

Stranger?
Obviously the magic she'd worked with the make-up had worn off. This kid was a hard nut to crack. ‘Well, I'm not really a stranger, am I? You and I are friends.'

Her little brow creased in concentration. ‘I guess so. But I'm still not allowed to get in a car with anyone except Dad, Gran, Uncle Dan, Aunty Bec, Jenny, Nate or Steph,' she counted the names off on her fingers. ‘Unless Dad says it's okay.'

Jo nodded. ‘Fair enough. But your dad did say it's okay to come with me, right? So we should get going.'

Ella nodded.

‘Here, give me your backpack and I'll throw it in the back.'

Ella did as she was told and then climbed up into the back seat. ‘Where's my booster seat?'

Bloody hell, the booster seat. She hadn't even given it a thought. It was too late now. The bus had gone, there was no one else around and she certainly couldn't leave the kid standing here on her own while she went to Ryan's place get it. In any case, the seat was probably in Ryan's car in town.

‘Sweetie. I don't have a booster seat, but I'm sure you'll be fine if you sit in the back with your seatbelt on. We don't have far to go.'

Ella jumped out of the car and shook her head vigorously. ‘I'm not allowed in a car without a booster seat.'

Jo let out an exasperated sigh. ‘Ella, I'm sorry but we don't have a choice. I don't have a booster seat and there is no other way of getting home. Hop in the car, please, and put your seatbelt on.'

‘No. My dad says I'm not allowed.'

The afternoon had barely started and already it was a nightmare. ‘Please sweetie, I'm sure your dad won't mind just this once. He asked me to pick you up and he knows I don't have a booster seat, so I'm sure he won't mind. This is what we call an exception to the rule. Sometimes in an emergency we have to bend the usual rules.'

Ella's baby blue eyes looked up at her from under long dark lashes. ‘Is Gran going to die? Is that why it's an emergency?'

‘Oh, honey, no. Your gran will be just fine, I'm sure. I just meant that we have no other way of getting home. I can ring your dad if you like and you can ask him what he thinks.' She'd hoped to get through the afternoon without having to call Ryan — she didn't wanting him thinking she was incompetent — but it seemed there might be no other choice.

Ella smiled. ‘Okay. That's a good idea.'

Jo pulled out her phone and scrolled down to Ryan's number. She pressed ‘call' but nothing happened. Damn it! There was no signal out here. ‘I'm sorry, Ella, but I can't get my phone to work out here.'

Ella made no move to get in the car. This cajoling thing was getting her nowhere.

‘Ella, you need to get in the car, right now. I'm in charge of you this afternoon and we are playing by my rules. Hop in and put your seatbelt on.' Jo's heart thumped in her chest as she spoke the words. If this didn't work she was screwed.

A scowl settled on Ella's face but she did as she was told. It wasn't the start to their afternoon that Jo had hoped for but at least the kid was safely in the car. Perhaps the best she could hope for was to do no harm. The way things were going friendship seemed too much to hope for.

Ella didn't speak during the short drive back to Yarrapinga. Jo turned the radio up and sang her heart out but when she checked in the rear-vision mirror there was no hint of a smile on the kid's face. If ever there was proof that she wasn't cut out for raising kids it was in the disdainful expression on Ella Galloway's face.

Once they were safely back at Yarrapinga, Jo let out an inaudible sigh of relief. They'd managed to get here sans booster seat — when had they even become a thing for school-aged kids? She certainly hadn't had one and she didn't know anyone who had. She couldn't remember ever seeing one in the States. But then when would she? Her life was completely child-free. None of her friends had children. She barely even noticed kids in New York.

As Ella dumped her backpack on the kitchen floor she noticed the child's eyes widening at the afternoon tea she'd left laid out on the table. Now that she looked at it there was rather a lot of food — far too much in fact for just the two of them, but she hadn't been sure what Ella would like so she'd bought a variety of treats.

She'd made a platter of cut-up winter fruits and bought a number of different flavoured yoghurts to accompany them. There were chocolate biscuits, blueberry muffins and, on a whim, she'd made fairy bread, although was more for herself than Ella. Any excuse to indulge in her childhood favourite was a good one.

‘Are we having a party? Who's coming?' The scowl had all but disappeared.

‘Um no, no party. This is just for us.'

‘Wow. That's a lot of food. Are you a really big eater?'

Jo laughed. ‘Sometimes. But I think I might have gone a bit overboard with this afternoon tea. I wasn't sure what you'd like so I got a lot of different things. We don't have to eat it all.'

Ella eyed the Tim Tams in the middle of the table. ‘Dad doesn't usually let me have chocolate biscuits if it's not a party.'