Finding Ever After (22 page)

           
“No she had a form of leukemia.”

           
“For the record Princess, those little shorts are cute as hell and I have a
feeling when that tank top is soaking wet and sticking to your skin, it’s going
to be just as good as a bikini.” He started to stand up and I looked at him
confused.

           
“Why would it be-” Realization dawned on me but it was too late, he was already
leaning over to pick me. “No!” I squealed and tried to get away, but his arms were
around me before I got two feet and then we were both moving toward the end of
the dock together. I removed my sunglasses and tossed them back toward my towel
so I wouldn’t lose them in the water. I could hear the other guys in the water
cheering him on and it sounded like
Vi
was somewhere
up on the shore laughing as well. I held my breath as I felt him push off from
the dock and then I was submerged in the cool ocean water. At first the
temperature change was a shock, but by the time my head bobbed back to the
surface and I took a few breaths it wasn’t so bad.

           
The first thing I did though was jump on Kyden and try to shove him under. It
turned into an all-out, epic free for all water war with everyone splashing and
dunking each other. Sometime in the middle of the battle, I heard three more
bodies hit the water and then we were joined by
Vi
,
Jake and Bas.

           
By the time I pulled myself onto the dock, my limbs were exhausted from all the
swimming and treading water. I sprawled out on my back and just the sun’s rays
soak in, warming me all over.
Vi
crawled up after me,
but most of the other guys swam to shore to get out and head for the beer. We
laid
there side by side, enjoying the heat. Neither one of
us said a word at first, but then
Vi
who broke the
silence.

           
“What are you going to do?” I didn’t need to ask what she meant, sometimes she
could see right through me even more so than Bas.

           
“I don’t know. Become a nun?”

           
“Sweetie I have a feeling that boy would have no trouble seducing even a nun.”

           
“It’s not the seduction that’s getting to me, it’s everything else. He’s funny,
playful and smart, even though he uses his intelligence for devious purposes.
He can cook and that voice, oh man, you should have heard him singing
A
Whole New World
to Isabelle.”
Vi
hadn’t met my
niece yet but she’d heard all about her.

           
“Even though most of the time he is absolutely
infuriating,
and vulgar and makes me want to punch him, he can be really sweet and kind.
He’s been there for me several times now during this whole Connor situation.
Last night I was a wreck and he took care of me. He got me calmed down and home
and he stayed with me all night.” I sighed. “Crap, it’s worse than I thought. I
really like him
Vi
.”

           
“Oh babe, that’s just a different kind of seduction. He’s seducing your heart,
not just your body and I’d say you’re past like.”

           
“I don’t know what to do about it.” I groaned. She looked at me
sympathetically,

           
“Maybe you should just tell him. He might surprise you.”

           
“No way.
Absolutely not.
I
already told him that I don’t hook up casually that I want the whole package,
and the look on his face was almost
panic
. He straight
up told me he doesn’t do relationships.”

           
“Maybe he’s just as scared as you are, but he might come around.”

           
“I don’t think so. He’s just not right for me.” It wouldn’t do me any good to
get my hopes up. We both lay there another ten minutes before going inside to
prepare lunch.

           
After we ate, the rest of the day consisted of more sunbathing and swimming.
Then I lost epically at a game of ladder golf and didn’t fare much better in
our three on three volleyball tournament. I should’ve sat that one out with
Marcus, who isn’t big on sports, but I let them coerce me into playing so that
they would have three even teams. Jake and
Vi
would’ve
been better off with just the two of them. Bas and Chris knew better than to
let me on their team, but
Vi
is a softy and Jake’s too
nice to admit that I’m terrible. Mostly I just tried not to get in their way.
Thankfully they’d all consumed enough alcohol that it helped even the odd, but
not much. Our team only won a single match out of the four we played.

           
Bas and Chris
bbqed
chicken for dinner, using their
dad’s secret
bbq
sauce recipe. It’s not all that
secret and it’s actually really simple, but still delicious. We sat around on
the front deck eating and talking and still arguing about whether or not the
volleyball had been out of bounds on the final hit of the “championship” game.
Danny swears that it was in, but he’s the one who hit it so what else was he
going to say? Of course Ace agreed with his teammate, but Spade and
Ky
wouldn’t accept the loss by one
whole point.

           
Later he and Spade got out a couple guitars and softly played while we watched
the sun go down over the water and everyone but me, sipped a beer.

           
It was a long day, fun but exhausting and I barely remember climbing up the two
flights of stairs sometime after midnight and getting ready for bed before I
crawled between the sheets and passed out. I couldn’t tell you when Kyden came
up to bed, only that he was already up and out of the room when I woke just
after ten. I found him out on the deck with everyone minus Chris and Danny,
when I went downstairs in search of breakfast. If I had known how the morning
was going to end up I might have gone back to bed.

           
“Morning Sleeping Beauty.”
Bas smiled. They were all
sitting around the large patio table, most of them with cups of coffee in front
of them. I slid into the empty seat between
Vi
and
Bas. Kyden was directly across from me, but he hadn’t looked up once since I
came out here. He was engrossed in what he was doing. He was sitting back in
his chair with one foot up on the seat and a composition book the he was
writing in, opened against his leg.

           
“He was the first one awake. He’s been going at that all morning.”
Vi
informed me.

           
“What’s he working on?” I asked even though he could no doubt hear me.

           
“Lyrics.”
Ace answered. “Once he finds inspiration
he’s like a mad man and doesn’t stop until he gets it all down on paper and
then reworks it over and over until he thinks it’s just right. He’ll probably
be sitting there for another couple hours.”

           
“You know I can hear you guys, right?”

           
“Yeah we know man. Just keep writing.”

           
“Then shut up and quit talking about me asshole.”

           
“Hey, she asked. I was just sharing with her your ‘creative process’ dickhead.”
Oh great, they would probably go back and forth until one of them ended up
throwing something. Chris and Spade barely gave them any notice as if this was
nothing new. Bas just shook his head and chuckled as the two continued trading
insults.
Vi
got up to refill her coffee mug and I
leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes.

           
A minute later
Vi
returned to her seat and I heard the
clink of her cup as she set it back on the table. The next thing I knew there
was a clatter, I felt the table shift and then I was covered in scalding hot
liquid all down the front of my stomach. I jumped out of my seat and without
even thinking, quickly tugged my shirt over my head to get the heat away from
my body.  

           
“Oh Shit, are you okay Jax?”
Vi
asked jumping up
behind me. “I’ll grab some ice.” She said rushing back inside the house.
Getting ice on my burn was suddenly the last thing I was worried about when I
looked around and saw so many pairs of eyes riveted to my chest. I knew better
than to be offended or pissed at them for staring at my boobs, because that’s
not what they were fixated on. No, their attention was glued to the long,
jagged pink line that ran from below my belly button all the way up to in
between my breasts. The horrified look on each of their faces was
understandable, but it still hurt.
A lot worse than the hot
coffee.
Vi
came back out and I heard her gasp
and the ice pack she was holding hit the ground.

           
Bas and Chris were there the night I refused to go to the hospital and their
dad had to stitch me up, so they were the only ones not staring. Bas was quick
on his feet and tore off his own shirt and handed it to me to cover up. I
pulled the shirt on but they had all already seen it. I felt the tears welling
in my eyes and rather than let them see me collapse right there, I ran back in
the house. I heard something shatter against the side of the house and as I
climbed the stairs Kyden’s bike thundered to life and took off down the road.

           
I threw myself down on the bed and just let myself sob like I hadn’t in a long
time. I didn’t try to clear my head or make them stop, I just let them flow. On
either side of me the bed dipped down and I felt two sets of arms wrap around
me. They didn’t say anything, just held me and I cried even harder, sandwiched
between two of the only people in the world who really understood. Even though
Vi
didn’t know all of the details, I’m sure she had guessed
most of them over time and now she would know.

           
Bas rubbed my back as my body shook.
Vi’s
body was
racked with her own sobs as she pressed against me from the front, her forehead
touching mine. We laid there for what could’ve been ten minutes or an hour, I’m
not sure, but when I was finally done and there were no tears left in me, I
knew I would eventually have to face everyone downstairs. I let my body relax
and I inhaled a few deep breaths before they released me and I sat up.

           
“
You going
to be okay Jazz?” I couldn’t find my voice
yet so I nodded and wiped my eyes. Thankfully I hadn’t put any makeup on today
so I wouldn’t look like a raccoon. Bas pulled me in for one more hug and he placed
a kiss on my forehead.

           
“I know you never wanted them to see, but they’re good guys. If you want to
tell them, they’ll understand, but if you don’t, they’ll understand that too.
Either way they won’t make a big deal out of it. They care about, every single
one of them and they can handle it.”

           
Once again I just nodded. I wasn’t sure how much I would tell them but they
deserved to know at least part of the truth. They were all going out of their
way to take care of me and help me
out,
they should at
least know why they were doing it.

           
It was
Vi’s
turn to speak up, “Do you want to stay up
here?” I shook my head.

           
“I love you both. I don’t know what I would do without you guys, but I just
need a minute to get myself together. I’ll be down in a minute.”
Vi
tugged me into her and I pulled Bas with me until we were
all tangled in a three way hug.

           
When they were back downstairs I finally got up and looked in the mirror above
the bathroom sink and grimaced. My eyes were red and puffy and my cheeks were
splotchy as well. I splashed some cool water over my face but I knew there was
no way I was going to be able to hide the evidence of my breakdown.

           
When I got downstairs everyone except for Kyden was still out on the deck,
including Marcus and Danny who must‘ve woken up at some point. When I stepped
outside conversation died down and they all looked up or turned their heads my
direction. The apprehension on Marcus’ and Danny’s faces matched the others’
expressions, so I knew someone must have filled them in on my gruesome strip
show.

           
“We didn’t tell them anything Tink, and you don’t have to either.” Chris
reassured me.

           
“He’s right, if you want us to pretend we didn’t see anything, we can do that
beautiful.” Ace’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, but I knew he meant what
he said. They weren’t demanding anything from me. They would do whatever I
wanted them to do in this situation, which was all the more reason why I owed
them some sort of explanation. I just didn’t know how to start. I closed my
eyes and took a couple of deep breaths to steady myself.

           
“What you guys saw, the scar.” My voice was shaking and I knew I was probably
going to lose it again. Bas stood up and walked over to me taking my hand in
his and squeezing it.
God, thank you for him.

           
He really was my rock, but I needed
to be strong enough to do this on my own so I gave him one squeeze back and
then let go of his hand.

           
“The guy in the bar from before, he’s the same one who slashed my tires last
night. His name is Connor. And he . . .” I didn’t know if I was going to be
able to get it out. I took another deep breath. “He, attacked me a few years
ago, and the scar is from the knife he used on me.”

           
I hadn’t ever spoken about that night out loud. Bas was the one who found me
and he filled his dad and Chris in when he brought me home, bleeding out all
over. Talking about it now flooded my mind with the memories of that night and
it felt like I was right back there. My heart was racing and my whole body
started shaking as the fear took over. My fingernails dug into my palms as I
clenched my fists. I was struggling to breathe, and then my knees buckled
beneath me.

           
All I could see were the branches of the trees above me and the sliver of the
moon that hung in the sky, providing almost no light way back here on my dad’s property.
Connor stood above me and I was certain I was going to die tonight. The tears
welled in my eyes as I begged, but that only seemed to make him enjoy it more.
He was getting off on my terror, but I couldn’t help it. I was so afraid. I
didn’t want to die.

           
I might have felt like it lots of times over the last six years, but now,
laying here on the hard grown in my torn clothes, staring up at the monster I
was sure was going kill me, I wanted to live. Funny how that happens, how it
takes being on the verge of losing something to make you realize just how much
don’t want to give it up. In this case, it was my life.

           
“Come on Princess, you’re okay. You’re here with me.” 

           
Wait. That wasn’t right, that voice shouldn’t be here.

           
Then Connor started to undo his belt buckle I knew it was going to be so much
worse than just death. I’d take death over this any day. I screamed for all I
was worth, but he just laughed. Out here it wouldn’t do any good. There was no one
to hear.

           
“Connor’s not here, he doesn’t have you. Just breathe, Princess, breathe.”

           
Kyden?

           
“Come on Jazz, open your eyes and look at me. Open your eyes damn it.”

           
They blinked open and instead of Connor sneering down at me I saw the faces of
my friends, filled with concern.

           
“That’s it, Jazz, I‘m here. We’re at the cape house. You’re safe. Nobody is
going to hurt you.” Once I realized that I was in fact safe and that I had only
been experiencing a panic attack, I was able to calm my breathing, and my heart
rate slowed. Bas was leaning over me while everyone else stood around us, but
my back was pressed up against something hard and warm. I could feel someone’s
legs straddling my hips and there were a pair of arms under my own wrapping
around me. I was lying in someone’s lap.

           
“
Ky
?” I whispered.

           
“Yeah, I’m here Princess. I’ve got you.”

           
I’m really glad you’re here.

           
“Me too.”
I hadn’t realized I’d said that out loud.

           
“You okay Jazz?” I hated that he had to keep asking that, but his time I wasn’t
going to pretend. I think it was pretty obvious to everyone that I was very
much not okay.

           
“I’m not sure if I am, Bas.” My voice came out strangled.

           
“I know Jazz. I know, but you‘ll get there.”
I hope so
.

           
Now that I wasn’t screaming and flailing around on the porch like a total
nutter
, everyone started trickling back inside to give me
space.

           
“Why is this guy still breathing?” I heard Spade mutter to someone as they
disappeared into the house. Then it was just the three of us sitting there.