Finding Home (30 page)

Epilogue

Four Years Later…

I couldn’t stop staring down at the tiny bundle in my arms.  How had I been blessed with something so perfect?  How had we created something so beautiful?  Soft patches of blonde hair covered his little head and his eyes were big and blue, just like his daddy’s.  I’d heard eye color wasn’t determined until a year old, but something told me his would stay just as blue as they were now.

He seemed so fragile and as he lay snuggled against my chest, all kinds of thoughts raced through my mind, namely how in the world had I been blessed twice to have created two perfect little boys.  First Aaron and now this little guy in my arms.  With Aaron, I’d known he would be going to someone else, that I’d have to let him go and not be the one to raise him.  Once I’d made the decision about adoption, I didn’t have to stress about how I was going to take care of him after he arrived, but with my son now, I wondered how we were going to take care of him.  I’d read books and articles during my pregnancy, but now that he was here, everything I’d read was a jumbled mess because he was real now.  He was my son…our son and I’d do anything to keep him safe.

Life had changed so much since the summer Brandon came home.  I’d finished my degree in respiratory therapy and had taken a job at a hospital in Wichita.  I got updates on Aaron twice a year from Michael and Kim.  He was in preschool and was the cutest little boy I’d ever seen.  I may have been a little biased though.  He had a head full of blonde hair that Michael and Kim kept short and he had big brown eyes just like me.  He loved trucks and airplanes and t-ball and playing in the ocean and he was always smiling.  He looked perpetually happy and even though it still hurt, I didn’t regret my decision.  I couldn’t have given Aaron the life his parents could when he was born and I held out hope that someday I’d see him again.

Brandon had decided to major in computer science, transferring to Wichita State when I got my new job.  Relocating to Wichita had been fun at first.  It was good to be out of Carver, especially since Riley and Jesse had moved to Seattle after they got married.  It just wasn’t the same without them, but Brandon and I both missed Carver.  We’d rented a little townhouse in Wichita and Brandon had proposed a couple of years ago.  Of course, I’d said yes, but for some reason, I’d been adamant about not getting married until we could buy a house.  Maybe it was because I remembered the stories of my parents’ struggles when they first got married, but all of my ideas went out the window when Riley and her baby had almost died.  Watching what Jesse, Riley and baby Gracie went through taught me not to take anything for granted and once I knew they were going to be okay, I wanted nothing more than to marry Brandon. 

We got married on October fifteenth and a month later, we were pregnant.  We hadn’t done anything to prevent it and when I found out, I was ecstatic…a far cry from what I’d felt the first time.  Brandon was beyond excited and I couldn’t have asked for a more supportive partner through it all.  I was blessed with an easy pregnancy and I knew how lucky I was after seeing what Riley went through and now, here we were with our son, Wyatt Jay Seaver.

Brandon sat beside me, just watching as I held Wyatt.  Holding him was the most overwhelming and incredible feeling I’d ever experienced.  It was different than holding Aaron.  I ached for Aaron, knowing I couldn’t keep him, but with Wyatt I didn’t have to worry about that.  He wasn’t going anywhere.  I loved him with such intensity the moment I heard him cry, and I knew Brandon felt exactly as I did.  He’d been right.  When I let Aaron go, that wasn’t the end for me as a mother.  It just hadn’t been the right time, but now was the perfect time and even though I knew it would be the hardest thing we ever did, we both knew it would be the most gratifying thing we ever did.

There was a knock on the door then and Brandon and I both turned our heads to see Riley and Jesse walk in.  They’d been back in Carver for a year now.  Jesse was teaching history at the high school and Riley commuted to the VA hospital in Wichita where she worked as a physical therapist.  Now that they were back in Carver, Brandon and I had plans to return as well.  Wichita had been fun, but Carver was home and we wanted to raise our family there. 

They looked at us nervously, obviously afraid they were intruding, but when I smiled and waved them in, they came in all the way.  Riley had an eager smile on her face, anxious to meet Wyatt.  Gracie, who was just over a year old, was resting on Riley’s hip.  She was a smiley, chubby baby and so different than the three pound preemie she’d entered the world as.  Looking at her now, you’d never know what a tumultuous start she’d had to her life.  Gracie’s hair was thick and dark just like her parents’ and even though she was only a baby, I knew she was going to be gorgeous.  It would be impossible not to be with Jesse and Riley as her parents. 

“Is now a good time?” Riley asked.

“Yeah, it’s perfect,” I said. “I’m glad you’re here.”

Riley didn’t waste any time and she handed Gracie to Jesse before making her way to my bedside.  She stood above me, staring down at Wyatt and when I looked up, she was staring down at him with tears in her eyes.

“He’s beautiful,” she said softly, reaching out and rubbing his arm with his fingertip.

“Wanna hold him?” I asked her and she nodded quickly. 

Carefully, I placed Wyatt in her arms and she pulled him close to her chest, nuzzling him into the crook of her neck.  She looked happy, but I had a feeling she was thinking back to Gracie’s birth and how she’d missed out on all of this.  I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty that everything had gone so easily for Brandon and me. 

Jesse walked over then, standing next to Riley as they watched our son sleep.  Even Gracie looked interested.  She seemed to cock her head to the side as she stared at him and then she stretched her arm out to him, wanting to touch him.

“Gracie, this is baby Wyatt,” Riley said, holding Wyatt a little closer so Gracie could see him better.  Gracie reached out again and this time she was able to touch her little fingers to his hand.  He cooed a little coo that was quickly becoming my most favorite sound in the world and we watched as his eyes fluttered open slowly.  They locked onto Gracie’s big brown eyes and they stared curiously at each other until Wyatt wrapped his fingers around hers and held tight for a few seconds before Gracie pulled away, obviously confused by this other little person.

“I think he likes her,” Jesse grinned.

“Not so sure about her liking him though,” I laughed and then Wyatt started to fuss.

“And that’s my cue to pass him back to Mom,” Riley said softly, placing him gently back in my arms.  Wyatt seemed to settle right down once he was with me.  I placed the pacifier in his mouth and he was asleep within seconds.  We sat and talked for a while, mostly about how I was feeling, but then Gracie started to get antsy and Wyatt needed to be fed and we all knew the visit was over. 

“We should go,” Jesse said and even though I was glad they’d come by, I was ready to be alone with just Brandon and Wyatt again.

“We’ll be back tomorrow,” Riley said and I nodded.  She leaned down and hugged me as did Jesse.  Riley kissed Wyatt on the forehead and then they were gone. 

I watched Wyatt for a few moments, still sleeping peacefully.  I wished he could always be this comfortable and innocent and happy.  I wished he could always know how special he was.  I wished the world would always be kind to him.  I wished he would always have the strength to persevere through everything life would throw at him.  I wished I could always protect him, but despite my wishes, I knew I couldn’t.  I knew one day I’d open my eyes and he’d be grown and he’d leave my protection and all I could do was pray I’d taught him well. 

As I thought about the future, I couldn’t help but think about the past too.  There was a time I didn’t think I’d ever truly be happy or that I even deserved to be happy.  I’d worried about Brandon too with everything he’d been through.  I’d always be grateful for the sacrifices he’d made for our country and marvel at his strength, even know after all this time.  I was happy now and so was he and I felt tears in my eyes when I glanced up at Brandon.  He was watching me too and when our eyes met, he smiled. 

“He’s incredible, isn’t he?” Brandon said softly, scooting onto the bed beside me. 

“He’s more than that,” I answered and then he reached for Wyatt.  I turned my head to watch Brandon cradling his son against his chest and I’d never been more in love with Brandon than I was right now as he held our son. 

“I never thought I could love someone like this,” he said softly, his voice cracking and I reached up, stroking Wyatt’s cheek and then turned my attention to Brandon.

“I know,” I said softly as I kissed him on the cheek.

“I love you, Mandy,” he told me.

“I love you too, Brandon.”  I turned on my side, curling up next to him.  His arm wrapped around me so he was holding me with one and Wyatt with the other and I closed my eyes, knowing that while life would do its best to tear us down, in his arms, our son beside us, this moment was perfect and for right now, that was all I wanted.

A Note from the Author

Thank you for reading
Finding Home
.  I hope you enjoyed Brandon and Mandy’s story.  When I began
The Home Series
, I never planned for it to grow the way it has. 
Last Train Home
was supposed to be a standalone novel, but the rest of the story needed to be told.  I never planned for Brandon and Mandy to have their own story either, but as I got to know them better through the other
Home
books, I thought their story needed to be told.  They were always the lighthearted ones from the Carver clan, but I knew their stories were much deeper than their exteriors in the other novels.  I’ve always had a fondness for both Brandon and Mandy from their first appearance in
Last Train Home
and I hope you’ve enjoyed getting to know them better, just as I have. 

The story doesn’t end here though.  This novel is the bridge to the next part of the series, which will feature Gracie, Wyatt and Aaron, so stay tuned for the next books in
The Home Series
. 

In case you missed the first books in
The Home Series
, they are all available on Amazon as eBooks and paperbacks:
Last Train Home (Book One), Far From Home (Book Two), Carry Me Home (Book Three)
, which is the companion novel to
Finding Home,
and
The Long Road Home (Book Four). 
My other two new adult novels are also available on Amazon:
After the Sky Fell Down
and
Here With Me. 

I love hearing from readers, so if you’d like to drop me a line or have any questions, you can email me at
[email protected]
.  You can also join my Facebook page
Fans of Megan Nugen Isbell (Author)
or keep up with me at megannugenisbell.blogspot.com for updates!

As usual, music played a huge role in this book and I’ve included the
Finding Home
playlist.  Thanks so much for reading!

Best Regards,

Megan

Finding Home Playlist

1. Give Me Back My Hometown-Eric Church
   
2. Catch My Breath-Kelly Clarkson
   
3. Belle of the Boulevard-Dashboard Confessional
   
4. Hell on the Throat-Dashboard Confessional
   
5. Stolen-Dashboard Confessional
   
6. Man on a Wire-The Script
   
7. Science & Faith-The Script
   
8. Flares-The Script
   
9. Beautiful-Plumb
   
10. I Don’t Deserve You-Plumb
    
11. Unspoken-Hurts
    
12. Stay-Hurts
    
13. Me and You-Kenny Chesney
    
14. Beautiful Tonight-Westlife
    
15. Safe-Westlife
    
16. Missing-for King & County
    
17. Every Breath-Boyce Avenue
    
18. Broken Angel-Boyce Avenue
    
19. On My Way-Boyce Avenue
    
20. Bless the Broken Road-Rascal Flatts
    
21. I Won’t Let You Go-Rascal Flatts
    
22. Never Seen Anything Quite Like You Tonight-The Scripts