Finding Hope (Love's Compass Book 2) (19 page)

Lance surprised Lexi when he took the water bottle from her hands and put it down on a chair nearby. He placed a firm hand on each of her shoulders and waited until she’d raised her eyes to his face. There were a lot of reactions she’d expected from him. But the gentle smile and the determination emanating from his blue eyes surprised her.

“Girl, I’ve been in love with you for more than a decade. If there’s one thing you can say about me, I have staying power. Or I’m obsessive. Pick whichever works more in my favor.” He gave her a wink.

Lexi chuckled and fiddled with the edge of her handkerchief absently.

He slid both of his hands down her arms to take her hands in his. “What changed? Why did you decide to come and talk to me?”

“Do you remember the abandoned baby I told you about?” He nodded. “He’s still at the hospital. I went to see him today and ended up holding him for almost an hour. He’s going to live with a couple who have been wanting a child for a long time. I realized that, even though what happened to that baby was horrible, God is using it to bring about a miracle for three different lives.” Lexi paused, searching for the right words. “I was worried about my cancer. I was convinced you would come to your senses some day and change your mind about me. I had focused so much on the future that I was missing out on the present. I guess I realized that I should probably leave that to God. I’m obviously not qualified for the job.”

Lance reached to gently tweak her earlobe and ran the back of his fingers down her jaw. “What does that mean, Lex?”

His touch made her pulse race as determination flooded every fiber of her being. “I love you, too. With all of my heart.”  

A brilliant smile lit up his face and he hooked an arm around her waist to draw her close. “Come here, you.”

When their lips met, he poured every ounce of love he had into the caress. She melted into him as he deepened their kiss. He tugged the handkerchief free and let it fall as he cradled the back of her head with his free hand.

He placed kisses on the corner of her mouth and behind her ear. “Does this mean you’re going to fire Laurie so I can take you to your last chemo session?”

Lexi moved her head back, doing her best to maintain a serious expression. “You’ve been there for all the games, you may as well finish the season.”

Lance laughed then, holding her close and kissing her until his good sense told him to quit.

~

“She married a farmer in Arizona? Wow.” Lexi was lounging on her bed, a bag of chips nearby, and her cell phone to her ear. It was early Monday morning. She’d been off work only thirty minutes and had called Lance as soon as she got home. They had a lot of catching up to do. “What did your parents have to say?”

“At first, Avalon swore me to secrecy. But I convinced her to talk to our parents. They took it well, though Mom’s disappointed she couldn’t be there for the wedding. I think it went as well as it possibly could have given the circumstances. Avalon woke up yesterday morning and left for a couple of hours. When she got back, she was determined to return to Arizona. Hopefully everything will work out and we’ll get to meet this husband of hers soon.”

Lexi sat up and crossed her legs. “It’s good she decided to go back.”

“I think so, too. I said that, if she needed me, I could come down for a few days in December. She said she’d let me know.”

“You’re a good brother.” She picked up the bag of chips and deposited it on the nightstand, moving out of arms reach before she ate them all. “Speaking of little sisters and hearing about their lives…” She told him about her conversation with Serenity the other night and about how she felt growing up.

“It sounds like things are going well between the two of you now.”

“They are.” Lexi smiled. It’d been a long time since she could think of Serenity and not feel anxious or sad. “I can’t wait for Sunday. It means I’ll be done with chemotherapy. And Gideon’s birthday party is after church.”

“I’m glad I was invited.”

“You’re practically part of the family.” The moment the words were out, Lexi felt her face grow warm. “You know what I mean.”

His deep chuckle reached her ears and she could imagine his blue eyes sparkling. “Yes, I do.”

Lexi yawned, unable to suppress it. “Sorry about that.”

“No worries. It’s been a long, eventful week.”

“It has.” She paused. She’d been checking into different employment options the last few days. To her surprise, she’d found several opportunities. “I’m thinking about finding another job.”

“Really? What brought that on?”

“A lot of things.” She laid back against her pillow and stretched her legs out. “There’s more to life than working. I love what I do and I love helping kids. But the rest of my life fits in around work instead of the other way around. I never have a predictable schedule with the hospital. And these twelve-hour days are killing me.”

“All valid points.” She could hear him take a drink of something. “What do you have in mind?”

“There are several openings around town. One I’m looking into is at the main pediatric clinic. They are a great group of people and Serenity always speaks highly of them. There are three pediatricians in the practice there and I would float around to whoever needs me.”

“I’ll bet the hours are better, too.”

She laughed. “Oh, yes. They open at eight. I would have to be there at seven-thirty, with an hour for lunch, and they close at five. I could get used to that. Monday through Friday, though they have clinic hours Saturdays noon to five. But I guess everyone rotates and I would only work one Saturday per month.”

“It sounds about perfect. What about the pay?”

“It’s a pay cut, but I’ll be gaining a lot of hours in my life. I think it’ll be worth it.”

“So do I. If it gives you more time to spend with the local carpenter, you won’t hear any complaints from me.”

Lexi chuckled. “I already submitted my resume. I’m hoping I’ll hear from them this week.”

“They’d be crazy to not hire you.”

“I appreciate that.”

They were both silent for a few moments until Lance’s voice came over the line. “I should let you go. You need to get some sleep before your shift tonight. Keep me updated on the job front, huh?”

“I will. Thanks again for the beautiful box and the glass ball. They’re perfect.”

“You’re welcome. I love you, Lex.”

“I love you, too.”

~

Lexi had been asleep an hour when her cell phone rang after nine that morning. She didn’t recognize the number. Sitting up in bed, she cleared her throat and answered it.  

The last thing she expected was for the pediatrician’s office to be calling asking her to come by that day for an interview. They scheduled it for one in the afternoon.

She desperately needed more sleep, but had to get up long enough to make a list of things to do before the interview. Her mind ran through a list of questions they might ask her. At least, when it came to pediatrics, she was confident of her knowledge and abilities.

If she said she wasn’t nervous, however, she’d be lying. She’d been working at the hospital since she’d left nursing school. A change was exactly what she needed, but it was also a little scary.

She sent a text to Lance.

“I have an interview at one. Please pray that, if this is what God wants me to do, all goes well.”

Five minutes later, she got a text back.

“I’ll be praying. You’ll do great! Text me after when you can, okay?”

“I will. Thanks! I’m going to go and try to get some sleep.”

~

“They offered me the job!” Lexi’s excited voice came through Lance’s phone. “I’m supposed to go in tomorrow to sign papers and should start work two weeks from today.”

“That’s great, Lex! I’m proud of you.” He inspected the calendar and circled the day, adding a note. “You’re almost done with chemo and then, a week later, you’ll have a new job. God’s giving you a fresh start.”

“You’re right. Sometimes, going forward, everything looks like a mess. But then we get through it, look back, and realize He knew exactly what He was doing.”

“Which is a good thing because if we were left to our own devices, we’d mess it all up.”

She laughed. “I have no doubt that you’re right. I hate to run, but I need to get in for my shift. Dinner tomorrow?”

“Absolutely. But I want to take you somewhere nice. You know, a restaurant that doesn’t resemble a hospital cafeteria.”

“What? Are you getting tired of dry enchiladas and slightly soggy tacos?”

“Maybe. But the company always makes it worth it.”

Lexi giggled. “I’ll text you.”

They ended the call and Lance knew he was grinning like a fool. His girl was getting a new job, she was almost done with her treatments, and he would see her for dinner tomorrow. Yes, life was good.

~

“Are you ready for this?” Lance reached for Lexi’s hand as they rode the elevator and walked down the hall at the cancer center.

“Very.” It was her last chemotherapy session and she looked forward to having the treatments behind her. She placed her free hand on her head. “I wonder how long it’ll take before my hair grows back again.”

“We’ll just have to wait and see. I’ve gotten used to it now.” Lance rubbed the top of her head. “Maybe you should keep it shaved.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Only if you do the same thing. And I’m talking your head and your goatee.”

He covered his face with his hands. “The head, maybe. The goatee? Never.”

They stopped walking and Lexi gave him a peck on his scruffy chin. “I’m glad. I like it.”

Lance kissed her before taking her hand again.

The nurse got her set up with the IV and took more blood samples.  “Did Doctor Ravenhill talk to you about the CA 125 test and CT scan?”

“She mentioned the test. It’s a tumor marker.”

“That’s right.” The nurse wrote Lexi’s name on the tube of blood. “She’s going to send it off and the numbers will give us an idea of how well the chemotherapy has worked. It’s especially helpful in cases of ovarian cancer.”

Lexi nodded. She’d read about the test and knew that, while it wasn’t always accurate, higher than normal levels in the bloodstream would at least give her doctor a red flag and warrant further investigation.

The nurse continued, “You’ll come back for the test every three months for a year, then every year for as long as the doctor feels that it’s necessary.”

Lance squeezed Lexi’s hand. “What about the CT scan?”

“Doctor Ravenhill always orders a CT scan after the last session of chemotherapy. She will check it to make sure everything looks normal and will use it as a base of comparison if any future scans are necessary.”

Lexi vaguely remembered the doctor mentioning the scan. She hadn’t realized it would be today.

She watched the nurse leave and looked at Lance. “I think those tests will be nerve wracking for a while. I wonder if I’ll ever get to a point where I won’t worry about the cancer coming back.”

Lance motioned for Lexi to scoot over and lounged beside her. She laid her head against his chest and listened to the comforting sound of his heartbeat.

He rubbed her shoulder and kissed her temple. “I don’t know. But you have to live your life and trust that everything is going to be fine. God brought us this far. We’re in it together.”

Lexi tipped her head up to look at Lance. “You know, this is the first session I haven’t counted down the minutes.”

“Oh yeah?” He shifted so he could kiss her. “I wish I could have held you like this every time.”

They talked about Gideon’s birthday party and the wood burning that Peter was learning. Lexi dozed off in Lance’s arms for a short while.

When the nurse removed the IV from her arm, Lexi flexed it. “That’s it.” She stood and turned to find Lance grinning at her

“That’s it.” He picked her up and spun her in a circle. He brushed a wayward tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb. “You made it.”

Tuck snatched a chocolate chip cookie off the plate on the counter and ate it in a single bite. “When do you hear about the test results?”

“Hopefully early next week.” Lexi would try and not focus on hearing from the doctor’s office until after Wednesday. She was kidding herself. There was no doubt she would be waiting on the edge of her seat for the call beginning Monday morning. She knew everything would come back okay, but getting that confirmation felt like the last step in putting things behind her.

Gideon ran by with a fistful of colorful balloons. He released them in the living room, watched as each of them bounced to a stop on the ceiling, then jumped to gather them again.

Laurie snapped a few pictures. “I love how he’s so joyful in everything he does.”

They laughed as the boy ran down the hallway to his room, balloons floating behind him.

Serenity smiled proudly. “He’s been looking forward to his birthday party for a while. We had it circled on the calendar and he’s tapped on that day for the last two weeks.” She checked to see he was still in his room. “I’ll get the gifts out quick. Tuck, will you give me a minute and then let the birthday boy know he can open his presents?”

“You bet!”

When they were ready, Tuck went to find his nephew. Rumbling preceded him when Gideon came running into the room. He slid on his knees in front of the brightly-wrapped packages.

Lexi took a seat on the floor, close enough to watch the unwrapping, but far enough away to give Serenity, Patty, and Grams the front row seats.

“Do you mind if I join you?”

Lance smiled down at her and she patted the carpet next to her.

“Not at all.”

He sat and leaned over to bump her shoulder with his.

They watched as Gideon opened the first two. The third one was the gift that Lexi had chosen for him. She’d put it in a large cardboard box that was nearly as tall as he was. She laughed as he struggled to open it. When he rescued the set of train bedding from the box, a grin appeared on his face.

Serenity gave her an approving nod.

Lexi got a kick out of Gideon insisting on dragging the bedding to his room before coming back to open another gift. “You know what I like about Gideon that you don’t see in a lot of kids?”

Lance bumped her shoulder again with his and winked. “What’s that?”

“I like how he opens a gift and doesn’t immediately toss it aside for the next one. He wants to inspect it and see how it works.”

They watched as he opened the rest of his presents, finishing with a train-themed mug and a large container of animal crackers from Lance. Gideon promptly opened the crackers and wasted no time in tasting one.

Serenity led Gideon around to tell each of them thank you for the gifts and prompted him to give hugs.

Afterwards, Gideon grabbed an armful of new toys and took them to his room. While he was gone, Serenity turned to address the room.

“Okay, we’ll have cake here in a few minutes. Gideon’s fine with songs this year. But no clapping or cheering at the end.”

Everyone nodded their understanding.

Lexi remembered his birthday two years ago. They had all started to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ like they had before and the poor little guy had dissolved into sobs. It took over an hour to get him consoled. No one could figure out exactly what had brought that on, but each year was a little different and sometimes they couldn’t anticipate everything. There was only one certainty when it came to autism: expect the unexpected.

Lance stood and reached a hand down to help Lexi up. As soon as she was on her feet, he managed a quick kiss before Serenity brought out the cake.

“That’s so cute! He’ll love it!” Laurie took a picture of the train cake, a number five candle on it.

Gideon approached it with a grin and got as close as he could. He touched the frosting at the base with a single finger.

“Okay, Gideon. We’re going to sing you happy birthday. Then you can blow out the candle and eat cake. Are you ready?”

Gideon watched his mom expectantly as she started them all in the song. He watched them, his eyes going to each person in the room, as they sang. When they ended the song, he grinned and blew hard at the candle.

Lexi was sure saliva had been expelled with the air but knew no one would care. “Good job, big guy!” She looked over to find Serenity with tears in her eyes. She put an arm around her sister and gave her a hug.

“I can’t believe my baby is five years old.” Serenity sniffed. “He did well with everything, too. I’m proud of him.”

“You should be! He’s a great kid.”

Serenity smiled through her tears. “Thank you.”

“And I think you can call today’s party a success.”

“Yes, I think so.” Serenity stood and watched her son devour his piece of cake, blue and red icing all over his chin.

She spoke loudly enough for everyone to hear. “Thank you all for coming!”

“Are you kidding?” Tuck swiped a finger in frosting and dabbed it onto Gideon’s nose. “I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”

The boy tried to stick his tongue as far as he could, hoping to lick the end of his nose. His antics had everyone giggling before Laurie took a napkin and wiped off his face.

Lexi followed Patty into the kitchen to clean up. When they were done, Patty motioned for Lexi to join her out on the back porch.

“I wanted to talk to you for a few minutes,” she said, taking a seat in one of the patio chairs. Lexi followed suit. “I’m thankful you’re done with chemotherapy.”

“Me, too! It’s been a long few months.”

“You know, when you first told us about your surgery, all I could think of was your dad’s fight with cancer. It was ugly.” She paused. “I wouldn’t wish what he went through on an enemy. Much less my own daughter.” Her voice caught and she cleared her throat.

Lexi reached for her hand. “Mom, you don’t have to talk about this.”

Patty gave her a smile. “I had nightmares every night for a week. Reliving those last days with your dad. Not knowing what would happen to you.”

“I know, Mom. Praise God, this time it was different.”

“He’s taken this whole thing and used it for a lot of good. Think about your relationship with Serenity. That’s an answer to prayer right there.”

“Yes, it is. Repairing our relationship is something I never thought would happen. It goes to show that, in everything, there’s always hope.”

“Let’s not forget how it’s brought you and Lance together, too.”

Lexi wasn’t going to argue with that. “There was one side effect from the chemotherapy I didn’t mind so much.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

Lexi stretched her legs out and clasped her hands behind her head. “I haven’t had to shave my legs in weeks.” She shrugged.

Patty laughed until there were tears in her eyes.

~

Lance chased Gideon around one side of the chair while Tuck went the other way. They met at the back and surrounded the squealing little boy. Lance picked him up. “He’s mine. Mine!”

“I don’t think so.” Tuck grabbed onto his feet and pulled.

“Well, if you want him, you’ll have to catch him.” Lance gave Tuck a wink.

Tuck backed off a step or two and Lance made a big deal of tossing Gideon into the air. It was only a few inches. But to a five-year-old, he was sailing through the air to land in his uncle’s arms.

Tuck tickled him and then set him down. The men watched as he ran off.

Lance jerked a thumb in his direction. “I think all that cake has gone to his head.” He scanned the house for Lexi and didn’t see her anywhere. A quick tally and he realized Patty was missing, too.

“They went in the backyard,” Grams said, winking at him.

“Thanks!”

When he got to the screen door, he saw both women laughing hard, nearly sliding out of their chairs. He opened the door a little. “Are you ladies okay out here?”

“Oh, yeah. Everything is going smoothly.” Lexi snorted and both women started laughing again.

Patty stood and leaned down to give her daughter a hug. Wiping her eyes, she opened the screen door the rest of the way. “Come on out, Lance. I need to go get something to drink. You can keep Alexis company.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

He held the door open for her and then sat down in the now-vacated chair. “It’s nice to see you this happy.”

“It’s been a good day.” She leaned her head back against the chair and closed her eyes. The gentle wind moved the leaves in the tree above her, causing shadows to dance on her face.

Lance got up to stand in front of her and placed a hand on either arm of the chair. Those dark brown eyes of hers opened, focusing on him.

“Have I mentioned lately how beautiful you are?” And kissable. Incredibly kissable. He touched her chin with one finger.

“Are you sure the sun isn’t blinding you right now?” She rubbed the top of her bald head with both hands, a teasing little grin on her face.

“Absolutely sure.” His lips sought hers, caressing them gently. She placed a hand on the back of his neck to draw him closer.

The back door opened. Lance groaned before he broke their kiss and stood up. He found Tuck standing in the doorway, a knowing smirk on his face. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet.” Lance winked.

“I was wondering if you wanted in on a friendly little game of basketball.”

Lance took in the pink flush of Lexi’s cheeks and couldn’t stop the smile on his face. “Only if you can talk Laurie into playing two-on-two. I’m not going anywhere without my girl here.”

“I bet that can be arranged.” Tuck grinned and ducked back inside.

Lexi stood and put an arm around his waist. “Thanks for being there for me through all of this. I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

He bowed before taking her hand and kissing it. “It was an honor, my lady. There’s nowhere else I want to be than by your side.”