For Nicky (22 page)

Between Nate and Nicky I was an emotional mess. The bookmarks about did me in. I know where my place is, but I almost feel like I’m giving in or giving up on ME if I go back to Nate. However, I miss him terribly and part of me thinks that we’re being ridiculous staying apart. Or, I’m being ridiculous.

I try to focus on my work but the mix tape MP3 file that Nate had sent me earlier won’t let me. He had included songs like, “Ho Hey” by The
Lumineers, “Beneath Your Beautiful” by Labrinth, which was the song we danced to for the first time, “A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri, and “All of Me” by John Legend. I probably listened to the whole thing 10 times before I finally forced myself to get to work. I had a preschool story-time coming in about 15 minutes, so I had to go get set up. Today was for 3-4 year olds, and I was looking forward to it. They were the cutest things! Not all of the students had cognitive or physical disabilities, but most of them did. One of our newer little boys had been attending for a while with either his grandparents or his dad.  Susan and Jack Jordan obviously doted on their grandchild, but his dad, Jeremiah, is absolutely adorable with him. I’m guessing he’s around 4 years old. His name is Beckett Jordan and he’s one of the cutest kids I’ve ever seen. He has a lot of challenges, but he’s precious.

I hear the kids start arriving. I usually let the kids and adults mingle a little bit before we get started. It’s good for the kids to socialize in a safe setting and many of these parents need a friend who can relate to their day-to-day struggles. I hear Beckett say, “Daddy, that’s what I want on my birthday cake!” and Jeremiah replied, “Well, Beck, we’ll see what we can come up with.” I hated to eavesdrop, but I couldn’t help it. I knew that Audrey needed the business so I grabbed one of her cards from my purse.

“Hi, Mr. Jordan?” I blushed when he replied, “Oh please, that’s my dad, just call me Jeremiah.”

“Ok, Jeremiah, I couldn’t help but overhear that you’re planning a party? Beckett, how old
are you going to be, buddy?” I couldn’t help but giggle when Beckett held up four chubby little fingers.

“My sister is a party planner, and she’s really good. She comes highly recommended by
myself and many people around town. She’s got great prices too. Her name is Audrey; here’s her card.”

“
Hmmmm, she must be really good. This is the second time I’ve had her name given to me.” Jeremiah takes her card and studies it. “I guess I’ll have to give her call. God knows that I have no idea what I’m doing when it comes to a 4 year old’s birthday party!”

“Can I ask who else recommended Audrey to you?” I’d have to let Audrey know she had two recommendations!

“Um, I don’t remember his name, but I played basketball with him and he told me his future sister-in-law was a party planner and gave me her name and number. I’m assuming it’s the Audrey you just told me about since I doubt this town has more than one party planner named Audrey. Thanks for this info. I better get Beckett settled in for the story.”

Jeremiah walked away and found Beckett. They both settled in on a couple floor pillows. I watched all of this while the words “future sister-in-law” floated around in my head. Nate told Jeremiah that Audrey was his future sister-in-law which means he’s insinuating that I’m his future wife. Oh, wow. Ok, I have to go read a story to 3 and 4 year olds. It’s a good thing I can read this book from memory because I’m feeling a little spacey right now.

I am officially head-over-heels for Libby Decker. Obviously I am. Only a totally-in-love guy would leave romantic notes and bookmarks made by his brother on door steps, make mix-tape MP3s, write love notes, send nightly texts, and, wait for it, plan a future vacation for his love interest in hopes that she’s his girlfriend again soon and will take said vacation with him. Yeah, I’ve got it bad. But I’m totally loving every second of it. It’s sort of like Libby and I are getting the chance to date a little more than we did back before Audrey screwed us over and things got so heavy.

I just finished the latest note that I want to send with the gift I got Libby. I was going to go with flowers, but I realized that was pretty cliché and didn’t really sound like Libby. So, this time I’m sending the note with a $50 Amazon card so she can get books on her Kindle. The last love note I sent was delivered to her at work by a very happy Nicky and came with a tea pot, tea cups, and gourmet tea.

Libby and I have been on a few dates recently, and I know she’s enjoyed herself, but I feel like she’s still holding back on making her decision. Our first date in Operation Get Libby Back was a return to the little drive-in where we went on our first date. I let Libby put the top on the Jeep down and we enjoyed burgers and fries and shakes. I got a sweet kiss from Libby at the end of that date. I felt like I was on top of the world. Maverick was sullen and pouty.

The next time I asked Libby out, we went for Mexican. The card I had Nicky deliver to her said,
“Once upon a time, a beautiful girl told me she loved Mexican food. Well, I love Mexican food AND I love that girl, so I’m hoping she will go to dinner with me tonight. Eat Mexican food with me, por favor mi amor?”
That night we spent over an hour after we ate just talking and laughing. I think the wait staff was about ready to kick us out.  Libby asked me to come in that night, but I declined. I smiled at her frown and my heart kicked up a beat when she let me kiss her. Maverick was beyond pissy.

Nicky loved helping me win Libby back. He was so excited the day he took her the invitation to watch a movie and eat pizza.

To
: Libby Decker

What
: A ROMANTIC comedy movie at Nate’s place with pizza

When
: As soon as she can get her pretty butt over here after work

Why
: Because Nate loves Libby and Libby loves romantic comedies and pizza

That night was absolutely perfect. I got to eat pizza, listen to Libby laugh, and hold Libby in my arms when she fell asleep a few minutes before the movie ended. She’d had a long day, and she’d seen this movie before, so she finally gave up fighting the sleep. I let her sleep in my arms for about an hour then roused her. Libby snuggled up next to me and slept for another hour. When I drove Libby home after that perfect night, I was dismayed at what she said when we reached her door.

“Nate, I just don’t know what to do. I love you beyond words, and I love spending time with you. Part of me wants to just give in and be with you officially. But, the other part of me has all of these reasons why I shouldn’t.” When I asked her to share those reasons with me, she told me to get comfy on the couch. The tournament tomorrow morning was going to kill me since it was already almost midnight, but there was no way I was going to leave Libby when she was wanting to talk.

“Nate, my list is long. Some of the reasons are valid. Some I recognize are just frivolous. But, here they are in no particular order. 1) You had sex with my sister twice. I worry what people will think of me for being with you after that. 2) You took a complete misunderstanding and turned it into this huge deal where you hurt me with your assumptions and insinuations and words. 3) You’re the first real boyfriend I’ve ever had, what if I’m only enamored with you because you were the first to show me any attention? 4) You and Nicky taught me to stand up for myself; part of me worries that if I come back to you then I will be hiding again or letting someone tell me what to do. 5) Honestly, I’m scared that if I do come back to you, I’ll fall even harder and deeper than I already have and then it will kill me if things don’t work out again. I feel like I need to make a decision because it’s not fair to keep stringing you along and giving you false hope if this isn’t going anywhere.”

Libby let out a deep breath and seemed to relax once she had unloaded all of that. Months ago, when I met Libby, she had trouble expressing herself to people and she’d never stand up for herself. Now, she’s standing up for herself and presenting excellent debate points over why we should or shouldn’t be together. This woman has grown so much, and I’m so proud of her.

I hugged Libby. “Baby, you’ve got valid reasons. I can’t tell you what to do. This has to be your decision. You know what I want you to decide, but it has to be your choice. I’m not going anywhere, and I’ll wait for you forever. But, I understand your concerns. I’m going to let you get to sleep. I’ll text you before bed. I’ve got that tournament out of town tomorrow, so I won’t be back until late. Oh, here, I have something for you. Don’t open it until I text you.”

I smiled at Libby’s frown. I gave her a quick kiss and headed home. Once I got home, I found the song that had been running through my head, “Brave” by Sara
Bareilles, and imbedded it in a text. Then I sent Libby a text:

Me
: Libby, open this song and listen to it once. Text me when you’re done.

About 3 minutes later, Libby texted that she was finished.

Me
: Okay, now listen to the song again while you read the letter I just attached.

Dear Libby,

You have a lot of concerns. I’m not going to point out the validity or invalidity of each of them. I’m just going to tell you that I’ve watched you grow from a timid, unsure, unconfident girl to a strong, BRAVE, confident woman. I can’t guarantee that being with me will be a cake walk, but some wise men once told me that a relationship worth having is worth working for, and I believe them. I’m so proud of the woman that you’ve become, and I want to be part of that. I want you to be part of me. Ok, go ahead and open the envelope I left for you.

Is it open? Are you wondering what they heck I’m thinking? Well, I’m sort of wondering that myself. I’m not sure if I’m overly stupid or just overly optimistic that you and I will work out, but I booked us a vacation to Gatlinburg, TN. I want you to decide to be with me (and not just for Gatlinburg) and if you do, I want to take you on that vacation I promised you. If this is too much or you decide to just be my friend, maybe you and Audrey could take the tickets.

Libby, I love you more than anything. I apologize again for the way I screwed things up. I’m learning all of this along with you as we go along. I can’t promise I’ll never screw up again, but I can promise that I will always stand by your side and love you.

I won’t keep pestering you for a decision. Take all the time you need and let me know your decision when you’re ready.

I love you, Libby.

Yours Always,

Nate

Now, I had to wait. Nicky was beside himself that we could only wait. I was going to be crushed if Libby left me, but I wasn’t sure how I’d console Nicky if Libby didn’t come back to us. I just had to hope that Libby could see for herself how much she’d grown and realize that with me is where she belonged. I hoped she decided it soon.
For me. And for Nicky.

I woke up with a smile on my face. Brave. Nate said I was brave. I guess what I went through with Audrey and standing up to her to get her the help she needed did make me brave. After I read Nate’s letter and listened to “Brave” again, I was convinced that I knew who Elizabeth Decker was. I was Elizabeth, Beth, and Libby all in one. I was my parents’ daughter. I was Audrey’s sister. I was Nicky’s friend. I was a valuable employee at the center. And, I was Nate’s girlfriend.

I couldn’t wait for him to get home from the tournament and a text seemed a little impersonal. So, I went to Nate’s house and asked his parents if I could borrow two things. 1) Nate’s Jeep keys. Luckily he had ridden on the bus with the team. 2) Nicky. Nicky had come down with a cold, but he brought along his Kleenex box. There was no stopping him from being involved with this.

Mr. and Mrs. Morgan both hugged me and Cindy’s eyes twinkled as she said, “Welcome back, Elizabeth, we missed you.”

I thought Nicky was going to knock me down hugging me. He practically bounced like
Tigger to the Jeep. Nicky talked non-stop the whole drive about how happy he was and how excited he was for me to marry Nate and give him babies and be his sister. I didn’t want to crush Nicky’s euphoria, so I didn’t tell him that a wedding and babies were probably a bit further down the road. Nicky and I made a plan on our drive. I handed Nicky the bookmark that said, “Miss Elizabeth loves Nate and Nicky” and we rehearsed what he was going to do and say.

Once we got to the tournament, we waited until one game was over and there was some wait time until a new one started. I stood outside the locker room and Nicky headed inside. I figured it would be less than a minute before Nate came out. I was right, in about 30 seconds Nate came busting through the door and crushed me into a hug. “Nicky tells me that you’ve figured out where your place is so you’re giving me back my bookmark? Is that true, Libby? Are you coming back to me?”

“Nate! Miss Elizabeth loves us! We got her back! Now she can marry you and give you babies!” Nicky was jumping up and down like a little kid hopped up on sugar. A bunch of people from the team and the town had gathered around to see what all the hubbub was about. Nate smiled and shook his head, “Nick, buddy, remember we talked about how that’s sort of private stuff to talk about?”

Nate turned to me and said, “So, will you go on that trip with me, Libby?” When I nodded yes, he pulled me to him and kissed me thoroughly until a few people started whistling. Ok, enough with the scene making. “Nate, go back to the tournament. Nicky and I will stay and watch if that’s ok with you. We can talk about the vacation tonight.”

Right before Nicky and I headed to our seats, Nate and I both got a weird text from Audrey.

Audrey
: What the hell, guys! You gave my name to some Jeremiah Jordan?? Surely you could tell he’s military. You know I don’t do well with military.

Nate and I exchanged confused looks. I’m not real sure what all that was about. I thought she’d be happy with a recommendation for her business. Who knows with Audrey.