How to Make Her LET GO & GIVE IN: The No-Bullshit Guide to Great Sex (18 page)

Let’s look at what these fantasies are, and how to bring them to life:

Submissive-Dominance Fantasies

Submissive fantasies are the most common. These fantasies can be as simple as being tied to the bed and fucked really hard, all the way up to being raped, used and abused by more than one man.

Female-dominant fantasies are fantasies in which a woman takes charge. Knowing that she can give you pleasure and pain is a huge turn on for a lot of women. She wants you to crave for her. That’s why she denies you pleasure before giving it, in the hope that you will desire her more. Things like tying you to bed and then riding your dick really hard, or giving you a striptease where you can’t touch her before you can put your dick inside, make her feel very desired by you.

These fantasies can also go a lot further. Sometimes it’s not just about giving and taking away psychological pleasure, but also about emotional and physical pain. Things like busting your balls with her high heels, tying you up or insulting and whipping you with a cane can give her a sense of control. When she only wants to give pain and no pleasure, she doesn’t want to be desirable for you. Then she wants to use a man to get rid of some frustrations, whether it be anger or pain.

A lot of times it’s the man she’s with that is causing her those frustrations. When she doesn’t feel satisfied on a deeper emotional level by him, she may develop sexual-abusive tendencies and may even get off on these. However, when this woman is with a dominant man, she will want to be desirable, and therefore be a lot more pleasing. That’s why she will not just give pain, but also pleasure.

Keep it safe!

In most cases your woman wants to feel your raw, overpowering desires. She wants to be controlled by her right guy because it feels so good. But when you are leading her in these bold ways, you must take some things into account:

As earlier mentioned, acting out these fantasies can be dangerous. Even if you know she has these desires, never, ever grab her out of the blue to force yourself on her. This is real rape and not just a fantasy. You need to realize that even though this might be her fantasy, being raped in real life is not exciting for her. In real life it will hurt her both emotionally and physically.

That’s why before we continue, I want to give you some safety precautions. There are three ways to carry out a fantasy like this in a safe way:

1. The first and most important rule is to not do anything without her consent, period! This means she needs to be sexually aroused during the entire experience. To really know if she is in to it, only do this when you know her very well. If you are inexperienced or don’t have a deeper connection, never try to do this.
   
2. The second precaution you can take is to gradually build up the fantasy. Firstly, start out with talking dirty and manhandling her lightly in a way she is already accustomed to. Then progressively build up your forceful side while observing how she reacts. If at any point her lustful emotional state of mind is broken by her rational mind, stop and take a gentler approach.
   
3. You can also talk about this fantasy before acting it out. Agree on what you can and cannot do and use a safe word that either of you can use at any time, so you know when to stop. The benefit of talking about this beforehand is also that you can really script it out in a detailed manner.
   
4. You can agree on a place where you can hide to surprise her or to act out the role play. A good example is to sneak up on her when she’s in the shower. There are also possibilities of using props like ropes, duct tape and masks that can bring her fantasy even closer to being a reality. These staged role-plays are easier than spontaneous ones; they are well calculated and if you stick to the rules you agreed on, there will only be pleasure, with no harm.
   

Example - the feeling of surrender

The following example is a spontaneous role play that you can build up on the spot.

I'm talking dirty in her ear, pulling back her hair while I spank her ass over and over as she cries out. I tell her that I'm going to do anything I want to her and that she's not going to be able to stop me. She says “No, don't” but her moans are getting louder. My dick rams hard inside of her and I go deeper, faster, rougher. My hands wrap around her throat only slightly, yet it reveals the extent of my control. I keep looking into her eyes as I slam into her, telling her she's my little fuck toy. I know she loves it that way, no matter how hard she fights it.

She keeps saying no, but she's so fucking wet. Her breasts are heaving with each panting breath and I can see she's getting more and more excited. She can't stop writhing, or moaning, her sounds of agonized pleasure fill my ears. I know she's close. I thrust in several rougher, maybe even brutal strokes. She comes really hard, her body exploding in spasms.

In taking her the way he wanted, with no care to her wishes, he made himself more emotionally inaccessible, and thus became more desirable to her.

Note: Obviously, her words of 'no' were merely token resistance; she never used her safe word, which would have put a stop to anything she didn’t want.

Exhibitionist-Voyeuristic Fantasies

These fantasies are all about watching or being watched. Exhibitionist fantasies are about feeling desirable or to shock other people. Voyeuristic fantasies revolve around curiosity and the pleasure of seeing someone naked when having sex.

Knowing her neighbour might see her when she’s having sex in your car on your driveway, or looking at people having sex at a swingers party are things that can create great amounts of sexual tension. But they also involve risks as the other people involved do not always consent to her fantasy.

That’s why some, but not all of these fantasies should only be carried out inside of the bedroom. Mirrors, videotaping, inviting another couple in your sexual games or role playing are all options you can use.

Some of these fantasies can be acted out fairly easily: you can find a nice spot at night with your car and have sex in it, she can leave the door open in her room when she’s undressing herself so you can see her, etc.

Example - The porn star

The thrill of the porn star fantasy is that she can live out all of her nasty wishes without hiding her true desires. She does not only want to please her lover, but every other guy who will see her. This is perfect for women who crave lots of attention.

To make this fantasy come true, you need a camera and if she wants she can dress up like a porn star. To gain her consent in using a camera she needs to trust that you won’t show this to anyone else. If she doesn’t, you can place a camera without actually filming it.

#

I’ve always had exhibitionist fantasies, but never really got to act them out. I love the idea of having sex in the forest, or the park at night.

Not that I’d like anyone to see us, it’s just the thrilling thought of almost getting caught. It almost happened once; when my boyfriend and I tried to have sex in the car on a street we thought was deserted.

However, I can’t deny that the mere thought of having sex outdoors and that someone may be watching is very exciting.

Stan brought up this porn star idea while having sex one time, he suggested that we shoot a video while having sex. It helped me explore my fantasy of being watched whilst having sex or having an audience catch me doing something naughty and wild.

The thought of anyone getting horny because of watching me had a delightful appeal, I decided to go with it and Stan began with words like: “A lot of guys will jack off to this video. Come on, scream like a porn star. Everyone will see just what a little slut you are.” Stuff like that got me so hot that I came so hard by the time we were done.

After I had that mind-blowing orgasm, Stan plugged the camera into the laptop so I could see us having sex. It was really exciting, and I can’t deny the whole experience was really worth the adventure.

I almost can’t wait for next time…

Group Sex

Group sex involves sex with more than two people: a threesome with another girl, two girls being used by twenty muscular guys, an orgy with lots of men and woman participating, etc. They can have a dominant or submissive nature, can include a partner or can happen with strangers.

Example - a threesome

The hardest part about this fantasy is finding the girls that are open for it or making her open up to it. Once you do, it’s actually not that hard to achieve. I’ve included it because this is a very common fantasy, not only for men but also for women.

The most important thing that you need to remember is that you always need to put your girl first
.
She needs to feel desired. If she feels you desire the other girl more, this fantasy will go wrong. She will then become jealous and feel hurt because she knows you desired the other girl more than her.

Although it's not the only way, the easiest way to make this happen is by having a girlfriend who already has bisexual tendencies. You can find this out by simply introducing this fantasy. If she goes along without too much objection, she’s into it. But if she reacts really jealous, it means she is not ready to share you.

The best girls to use as the third person are girls that you both know personally. It’s better not to use a celebrity or porn star because she doesn’t feel the same connection with them as the girls that she meets in real life. It is also very important if you are planning on replicating this fantasy in real life, as you don’t have access to the girls you see on your computer or television.

A good moment to start this fantasy is after both of you met the other girl, let’s say after having some drinks with friends. If you think your girl went along fine with the other girl, you can later on talk about how attractive she is. You don’t need to do this blatantly. Just mention something like she had a nice dress and turn this into a conversation where your girlfriend acknowledges that she is indeed attractive. This way, you know she’s also into the other girl.

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It happened one night after we went out with some friends, my girlfriend lives out of town so she slept over with he
r boyfriend in our apartment.

At the party I'd seen my boyfriend talking to her and I think she liked him. I felt strong feelings of jealousy, so I mingled myself into the conversation to know what was going on. Stan acted cool and distant to the girl so I was kind of reassured.

Later on when we got back home and had sex. Afterwards, I asked if he found my friend attractive and he said jokingly, "Yeah, Catherine is hot; too bad her boyfriend is here otherwise we'd have slept with her."

Then he kissed me, his finger sliding into my pussy as he started rubbing against my G-spot.

He asked me if I thought she was hot too, I started to get more and more aroused. I said yes, to which he replied: "Next time you should both share a kiss, it will make my dick so fucking hard.”

Then he put his dick inside of me and looked deeply into my eyes, while whispering: "Ooh Princess, your pussy feels so good. Let's make Catherine our slut."

I said, “No, I don’t want to.”

"Don’t worry you're still my princess, she’s just going to be our slut, I know you want to kiss her. She’s so sexy, I know you want to do it for daddy." He fucked me harder and harder. I started to moan louder, I didn’t want the others to hear my sounds so I tried to be as quiet as possible.

He started saying, "I’m fucking Catherine right now," and then licked my breasts. "Ooh Catherine, your boobs are so sexy. Look at me fucking Catherine. I know it makes you so jealous."

"Yes it does, I don’t want to share you." At the same time I really start to picture him fucking her. It makes me feel bad, yet so horny at the same time. I get more and more aroused and I’m about to come. This image of him fucking Catherine really hard plays over and over in my mind as he thrusts in me. I scream as I am about to come.

Afterwards, the thought of having a threesome with Catherine stayed in my mind. I started seeing her in a more sexual way. A couple of weeks later she came over again, but this time without her boyfriend because she had had some
problems with him.

We opened a bottle of liquor and things got more laid back. We talked about girl stuff, relationships and even sex. The conversation then got raunchier as we started to get into our little wicked fantasies. It just seemed like talk and nothing we'd think of trying out for real.

While talking, the threesome thing came up in my mind. I knew Catherine liked Stan and he liked her, so
I was
mostly afraid because maybe he liked her more than he should, maybe even more than me…

The topic shifted to kissing girls and I ended up kissing Catherine on a dare. I have to admit, it sort of escalated from there. I didn’t expect it to feel so good to taste Catherine's soft lips and feel her breasts pressing into mine. Soon our hands were roaming all over each other and we were stripping off our clothes. Now just in our underwear, we writhed on the floor making out.

At first Stan was happy to watch, but as the passion grew heated, he joined in and it became mind-blowing. The dynamic of an extra female sharing one male did things to me. I found that I enjoyed the fact that it was so taboo; having to share my boyfriend with a friend. Somehow, Stan made it feel so natural, giving me all of the attention I needed whilst keeping me excited whenever he touched, kissed or fucked Catherine. I had some really unforgettable orgasms that night.