I Carry Your Heart (Heart Series Book 1) (12 page)

I smiled, groaning my approval.

His hand skimmed over my t-shirt, working its way down to stroke the exposed skin on my lower back. He knew the desired effect it had on me. I groaned deeper with his touch and felt his grin against my neck, clearly delighted at my response.

His lips carried on their sweet torture, finally making their way back to mine. They were hungry for him, needing him so badly. I bit down on his lower lip and he gasped in delight, surprised by my actions.

I smiled using it as the perfect opportunity, to slip my tongue inside. He moaned softly with pleasure, inviting me deeper into his mouth. With every caress of his tongue, I was beginning to come undone. My fingers grasped his hair, holding him in place, desperate for his mouth never to leave mine. I wanted him so bad. He was my every waking desire, my fantasy and my body burned only for him.

He moved away, much to my displeasure. My eyes anxiously scanned his face for some indication to why. He was breathing heavy, struggling to pull air back into his body. His pupils were dilated and his eyes burned darker. I saw the unmistakable look of lust was evident when his eyes locked with mine.

He was definitely turned on.

Plus it was pretty hard to ignore the large erection digging into my hip.

We lay panting, as I stroked his hair, staring deep into his eyes. He was struggling to keep some level of control, pulling away while he still could. I knew he wanted more but I was not ready to go that far, well not yet.

He smiled drawing me in tight against him, snuggling up together. I nuzzled my face deep into his neck, placing tender kisses against his skin. He had never experienced anything like this before. The concept of snuggling was foreign to him, which made it even more special. His arms encircled me tighter, our hearts beating together and we slowly drifted off into a contented, blissful sleep.

* * *

“Shit Iz, Mike and your Mum will be home soon.”

My eyes sprang open and I jolted at the sudden noise. For a few moments I was lost, wondering where I actually was. Then groaned at the thought of leaving his warm body.

“Just five more minutes,” I said, kissing his neck, nuzzling into him more.

“Baby, they’ll be here by then.” He laughed, lifting us both up into a seating position. He picked me up, carrying me upstairs to my room.

When he attempted to put me down on the bed, I clung on tight. I didn’t want to let go just yet. He chuckled lying down on top of me, softly kissing my lips. His nose gently stroked against mine, as he patiently waited for me to open my eyes.

“Izzy, you have to let me go.” His voice was laced with amusement.

I knew he was secretly enjoying it.

“Never,” I yelled, beginning to laugh. He kissed me again, but this time he pushed himself up, breaking out of my hold and I pouted my disapproval.

“Iz, we can’t let them catch us like this, when we finally tell them it’s got to be right, and I really need to calm down before Mike gets home. If he sees me with a hard on he’ll think I’ve been watching porn.”

Ugh porn.

I instantly frowned, hating the fact he watched naked women having sex and doing god knows what else.

He grabbed both my hands and dragged me up from the bed, guiding me into his chest. He wrapped those strong arms around me, softly stroking my hair. “You don’t have to be jealous, I haven’t watched porn in ages. I don’t look at any other women now I’m with you.”

Yeah right.

I pulled away from him, giving him a look of disbelief.

“It’s true, you’re all I think about. You are in my head every second of every day, you’re always here with me.” He placed my hand over his heart and I felt the precious beat beneath my fingers. I looked up into a pair of warm eyes, so sincere in making me believe every word.

I cupped his face. “You’re always with me too Joel, the thought of ever losing you...” My eyes filled with tears. It was my greatest fear, that it could all be snatched away and I’d be left broken, shattered into a million pieces.

“Hey,” he soothed. He pulled me in closer and rubbed my back gently. “You have me, I’m yours forever.” He pressed his lips against my forehead, to console the fear pulsating through my body.

“I hope so,” I whispered, drawing myself tighter into his chest. I nuzzled my face into his soft, warm skin, desperately needing his words to be true.

* * *

“Hey, have you got a guy in this room?” Joel asked, marching through the door. He pretended to look annoyed and pulled open my wardrobe doors, pushing his head deep inside, to check for any signs of unwanted guests.

I chuckled at his remark. He’d obviously overheard the conversation with my Mother. Who had unceremoniously barged through my door without her customary knock, only moments before. Her mocking reply was still ringing in my head, when I mentioned the fact I could have had a guy in my room. Joel’s jokey tone helped to soothe my anger, at her teasingly cruel words.

“Yeah he’s just sneaked out the window, he’ll be back later though.” I grinned, giving him a cheeky wink.

Joel took two quick strides, flinging himself onto my bed, so his body was pressed tight up against mine. “Did you tell him you have a boyfriend?” He brushed his thumb against my cheek, his warm, sweet breath tickling my face.

“Why are you jealous?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. I bit my lip trying to conceal the smile creeping over my face.

“Of course, no one gets to kiss those precious lips of yours but me.”

A soft moan escaped from me, when his lips connected with mine. I voluntarily open my mouth, allowing his tongue all the access he needed. I groaned loudly in disapproval when he pulled away. I scowled and he chuckled at my face.

“I have to go, Mike will be back soon.” He held my face in his hands, trying to soothe my agitated state.

“I miss you already, we never have enough time together.” My voice was almost a whisper, the sadness inside beginning to build.

“I think I may have a solution for that.” He grinned and my face instantly brightened.

“What is it?” I asked, feeling hopeful. The constant interruptions were beginning to take their toll.

He tapped his nose with his finger and blew me a kiss, disappearing out the door.

Wow, he really was a tease.

* * *

Joel soon unveiled his plan, sneaking in my bedroom at night. It was all purely innocent, spending the whole night wrapped in his arms. It was our way of spending quality time together, without being discovered. Joel told me it was his favourite part of the day, when he got to hold me. His words nearly broke me. They held such an underlying sadness to a cruel and unloved home life, which made me truly honoured to be the one to love him whole-heartedly.

He still had bad days, which he tried his best to conceal. But I saw the level of pain he kept hidden inside his eyes. He was starting to stay over more, which had a lot to do with our new sleeping arrangement. His craving for the love and affection he had long been starved of, was now being satisfied through me. I was only too happy to shower him with as much as he could handle.

My breath hitched hearing the familiar creak. My eyes flicked up from my kindle, to the sight of Joel grinning in the doorway. I smiled watching him perform his usual routine, wedging a magazine tight under the door as a makeshift doorstop. To avoid any sudden attempts to enter without permission. After checking it was secure, he strolled over smiling, joining me under the covers.

He pulled me tightly against him and our legs tangled together as his arms wrapped around me. We lay facing each other and I reached over to stroke his cheek. His eyes remained closed, concentrating on my touch.

I leaned over gently placing a soft kiss on his lips, as his eyes fluttered open. “Bad day?” I whispered, preying he’d let me in and tell me what was wrong. He had been quiet at dinner and his silence hadn’t gone unnoticed by us all. We had chatted around him, filling the void, as he evaded any form of eye contact throughout the meal.

“Not now I’m with you.” He smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Want to talk about it?” My eyes stared intently into his, willing him to speak, to open the floodgates and let me in.

He rolled onto his back, letting out a loud sigh. “Just the usual, I’m a worthless piece of shit and he wishes I’d never been born. He said my Mother would be embarrassed if she was still alive today. He says the same thing all the time, but when he mentions her it hurts the most.” The sadness radiated off him, as he lay there, trapped in his own misery.

My fingers guided his face back towards mine to kiss him. I drew back to look into his tortured eyes. “You Joel are the most caring, funny, sweet guy I know. Your Mother would be so proud of you, don’t believe your Dad’s cruel words, he is the worthless pieces of shit for not bothering to realise what a beautiful son he has.”

I knew he needed more comfort, to get closer and feel the reassurance he wasn’t alone. My hands eased his head down onto my chest and I cradled him in my arms, wrapping my legs around him tight. I soothingly stroked his hair and we lay in complete silence, with just the sounds of our breathing filling the room.

“This is my heaven being here with you Iz. I never want to lose you.” His sad words caused my heart to ache, the pain so intense and overwhelming I could barely breathe.

I clutched him tighter, trying to convey with my body that I’d never let him go. “I’ll always be here for you Joel,” I whispered back. He nuzzled his face deeper into my chest and let out a small sigh, as I felt him slip under. While I lay wide-awake, staring into the darkness, heart broken for my poor lost soul.

* * *

The alarm went off early and we both groaned in unison. It was only six thirty but Joel had to make his swift exit, and return to his room before my Mother got up at seven.

He pulled me into a tight embrace, nuzzling my ear. “Morning gorgeous,” he whispered. His voice already sending shivers down my spine.

Gorgeous? Yeah right.

I grimaced at his words; I looked anything but.

He tickled me, trying to make me smile, but I shrieked in shock. Quickly slapping my hand over my mouth, glaring at Joel.

“Sorry,” he murmured, pulling a face.

I smacked his shoulder, which prompted his usual wounded puppy dog look. He knew my weakness and that look was my Achilles heel. I leaned over gently pecking him softly on the lips and he grinned, knowing he was forgiven. He rolled over on top of me and pushed me down into the mattress, kissing me fully. His tongue invaded my mouth and I groaned, feeling the full extent of his morning glory sticking into me.

“I see someone’s up bright and early.” I grinded my hips against him, to emphasis my point.

“Baby, you can’t expect me to sleep next to a beautiful girl and not be affected.” He chuckled, grinding it in to me to make his point.

“So I turn you on in my kitten pyjamas?” I laughed at the very idea.

“Oh yeah, too right,” he said, with a mischievous glint in his eye.

He stroked his nose against mine and we gazed at each other smiling, but I was still concerned about his mood from the night before.

“Joel, are you okay? You know after last night…”

The smile slipped from his face. I’d obviously touched upon something he’d already wanted to forget. “Yeah, I’m good Iz, you make it better, you always do and now I want to return the favour.”

I raised my eyebrows questioningly, but I soon got my answer. He slowly began rocking his hips against me, rubbing me in the right place. I gasped with delight and my legs spread wider, giving him more access.

“You like that baby?” he whispered in a low husky voice.

Oh god, did he really have to ask?

“Yes.” Wow, even my voice sounded so needy.

I was truly embarrassed.

He began slowly kissing me, grinding into me. His hand grazed my breast and waited a few moments for me to react, to say no. He started to gently tweak my nipple, through the material of my pyjamas.

The sensation alone has me gasping, my nipples grew harder in response to his touch. I felt him smile against my lips, but his tongue never lost the rhythm, that was perfectly matched with the grinding of his hips.

I lost myself in his sweet, delicious torture, feeling my body begin to climb. “Oh god Joel I’m going to–” I gasped. The unfamiliar sensation filled my body, overwhelming me, taking me higher and pushing me towards my release.

“Let it out baby, I want to hear you,” he whispered and grinded harder, giving me the extra friction I needed.

Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.

My eyes rolled back, as pleasure swept over me. I groaned loudly when I came, Joel quickly covered my mouth, swallowing my moans. He slowed the grinding down, letting me enjoy the aftershocks and kissed me gently once more, before jumping out of bed.

I sat up looking flushed and surprised, already missing his hot body. “Where are you going?”