In the Raw (19 page)

Chapter Thirty-Six

Ethan

While Lassiter scrubbed his evil ass in the shower I flipped open my phone and dialed Claire.

“Please for the love of all that is holy tell me you got down on your knees and begged forgiveness until the end of time,” she mumbled when she answered the phone.

“Well, I got down on my knees...” I trailed off, just to mess with her.

Seconds later, fake barfing noises had me laughing.

“You’re a nasty, nasty man.”

“Yes. Yes, I am. But yes...we’re working on it.”

She let out a relieved sigh.

“Thank God. I thought I was going to have to lock you two in the storeroom at school to get you to talk.” She chuckled and I snorted, recalling Jamie’s confession regarding the very same storeroom. “You know he’s good for you. He doesn’t take any of your shit, E. He pushes you and he’s stubborn enough to put up with you.”

I rubbed the back of my neck.

“Yeah, I know. He’s braver than I could ever be. Did you know his parents are pretty much cutting him off of everything?”

“Because of you?”

“Partly. But mostly because he won’t do what they want. They’re treating him like a child. Goddammit.” I rubbed at my eyes. “Why is shit always so complicated? I want to fix this for him and make the bullshit stop.”

“Big brother, you can’t fix everything. All you can do is let Jamie deal with this in his own way and support him.”

Shit.

“Claire, about that... They’re kicking him out of his condo...”

“And?”

“And I kind of volunteered our place for him to stay until he figures out something permanently.”

For a moment silence greeted me on the other end of the line.

“Claire, you still there?”

“Yeah, I’m here, E. Are you sure it’s a good idea? I mean, you two just started talking again. Living with someone is a big step.”

I rolled my eyes.

“It’s temporary.”

“Maybe, but what if he can’t find another place right away? You’d be sharing a room with someone you’ve just begun a relationship with, Ethan. As much I love Jamie, you’re my brother and you need to be smart about this if you want it to work.”

When the bathroom door opened and Jamie walked out wrapped in a towel, my attention wandered. As I watched a drop of water slowly roll down his chest, his skin flushed from the hot shower, sharing a room was the least of my concerns.

“Gotta go, Claire. Talk to you later.”

“Wait, Eth—”

I snapped my phone shut and tossed it on the counter.

“Is Claire okay with—”

The three feet of space separating our bodies disappeared as I stalked toward Jamie, intent on getting us both naked as quickly as possible. I shoved one hand into his wet hair and ground my body into his until I’d backed him against the fridge. He was my only focus. Not plans, not the scholarship, not his shitty parents, not anything but making him feel.

* * *

Jamie shook his head at me, his smile amused. “Well, yeah. I had to figure out something. I may be pissed at my parents but it’s not fair to leave sweaty marks all over the fridge for the poor cleaning lady.”

As we were leaving his parents’ condo, he grabbed the letters from his mom and the lawyer, shoving them deep inside his backpack. When I raised my eyebrow at him in a silent question, he shrugged it off without a response. I remembered Claire had said to let him work stuff out without trying to fix it so I tried to keep quiet. Except for the radio tuned to some pop station I barely tolerated, the drive to my apartment was silent until I squeezed Jamie’s knee and pointed at the next exit sign. “Take the next exit.”

He looked over at me with a blank expression, then nodded and turned on the blinker, checking the traffic behind him as he switched lanes. Once he had safely navigated the right exit, he covered my hand with his and squeezed.

Too much had happened over the past twenty-four hours. I shifted back in my seat. I knew I should stay quiet, but I hated what his parents were doing to him. “Jamie? Fuck them. Your parents should realize they have a son. Not a brand or a name. A son.”

His fingers twisted around and squeezed mine tightly. “Thank you, Ethan. No one’s ever asked me what I want or need. No one’s cared enough to. I’m trying to wrap my brain around everything, but it’s a lot to let sink in.”

My heart clenched at the thought of the letters in his backpack, wishing like hell I could change the situation so he wouldn’t have to feel like he’d been kicked out of the only home he’d ever known. “I still want to kick your dad’s ass. Just sayin’.”

He laughed for the first time since we’d gotten in the car and navigated his way through the crowded streets near my apartment. “I’m sure you’re not the only one who’s ever felt that way. But for the first time since I can remember, I’m free to choose what I want to do without worrying about disappointing anyone. It must sound bizarre to you, but I’m actually okay with it.”

I didn’t know what else to say, so I let him drive the last few miles in silence. I didn’t understand how he could blithely accept his parents completely cutting him out of their lives. As for the money thing? I had a feeling Lassiter had never had to live without. Not like Claire and I had for long periods of time in our lives. Freedom came with a price. I could understand the wanting to be free, but the practicality of it was another thing altogether.

He parked my car not too far from my building and together we carried the few bags he’d packed up the stairs. When I unlocked my apartment door, I could see him hesitating on the threshold, uncertainty written all over his face. Before he could voice any more doubts about whether he should be staying with me and Claire, I dropped his bags on the floor. I leaned in to frame his face with my hands, brushing my lips softly against his. “Welcome home, Golden Boy.”

I felt his smile against my lips before his body finally relaxed against me. Regardless of what Claire had said, this was right. This was where he was supposed to be. I cupped his jaw tighter and fused my mouth over his in a crushing kiss. His hands slid into my hair, holding me tightly to him. My fingers slipped from his face and slid down his body until I found the hem of his shirt. The instant they slipped underneath the fabric, I knew it wasn’t enough. I needed to feel his body against mine.

His fingers tugged at the waistband of my jeans when we heard someone clearing her throat behind us. We broke the kiss, panting against each other’s lips, but I kept my hands firmly locked around Jamie’s hips.

“I don’t know whether to hug you both or kick your asses since you seem to delight in giving me an ulcer at the ripe old age of twenty-one.”

Jamie tried to untangle himself from my embrace, but I kept him flush against my body as I turned toward my sister. “Perfect timing as always, little sister. And I’m sure you’ll get a chance to both hug and kick our asses as soon as we’re done here. So, do you mind? We’re kind of in the middle of something.”

Jamie turned bright red when Claire’s face sported a huge grin. She closed the door and walked over to us, smacking me on the back of the head and kissing Jamie on the side of his. She waggled her finger in our faces. “No sex on the sofa. I like to sit there when I watch TV. And no ass prints on anything. That includes countertops, tables, the floor...”

Jamie groaned and hid his face in my neck. God, I loved my sister. I laughed and saluted her with my free hand. “Aye aye, Captain. No ass prints on any surfaces. However, have you seen Lassiter’s ass? I’m betting it would make some smokin’-hot ass prints.”

Jamie burrowed even deeper against my neck and mumbled something along the lines of, “For the love of God, please make it stop.” I kissed the side of his head and laughed harder. What I wouldn’t give for a rewind button to replay all of this on days when I needed a good laugh.

Claire crossed the apartment to her bedroom, shooting us a look over her shoulder. “No ass prints or I’m making you clean the entire apartment. And I know how much you love to clean, E. Have fun, boys.” She headed into her room and shut the door. A few seconds later, loud music began blaring through the walls.

Jamie finally peered up from my neck and burst into uncontrollable laughter. I grabbed his hand and began leading him back toward my room. “I guess that’s our cue to be as loud as we want to be.”

The look on Jamie’s face betrayed how much he wanted that to be true as he tugged on my hand and practically dragged me the rest of the way across the apartment.

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Jamie

Two weeks later, I sat in Ethan and Claire’s apartment, my fingers tangled with Ethan’s. I focused on Ethan’s mouth as he sprawled on the couch. As distracting as he was, I tried my hardest to listen to him read through the final draft of our presentation for our communications class that afternoon.

“Jesus, when I read this out loud, do I sound like a self-righteous douche to you? Or is it just me?”

My low chuckle got a raised eyebrow in response. He looked up at me, totally serious as only Ethan could be wearing boxers and nothing else.

Since the weekend I had skipped out on the family dinner with my parents, I’d only gone back to my condo to grab clothes, each time expecting new locks. Each time my key still worked, I wondered what my parents were waiting for, but I pushed it out of my mind. I’d rather spend my time with Ethan. Their place felt more like home than my cold condo had. Thank God both he and Claire had invited me to stay there until I got back on my feet.

“Jamie?”

I blinked and focused on his face instead of where my eyes had wandered down his abs and lower.
Speaking of welcomes
.
Hello
,
happy trail.
“Yeah?”

“I just proposed a group orgy in my apartment with select members of our Comm class, and you nodded.”

I grinned innocently and trailed the fingers on my free hand over the abs I was admiring. My grin widened at the shiver that ran through his body. “Who was on the guest list again?”

He closed his eyes and shoved the papers aside. “I’ve decided it’s going to be an orgy of two. I’m very picky about who I let into my apartment.”

His eyes opened and he smiled lazily when I lay down alongside him on the couch. His arms instantly wrapped around my torso, pulling me closer until my head rested under his chin. I turned my face to gently kiss his warm skin and was rewarded by a deep, rumbling sigh. Angry Ethan was attractive when he wasn’t driving up my blood pressure. Horny Ethan? Ridiculously sexy, especially when he was trying to remove our clothes as quickly as humanly possible. Handsy Ethan, who was quiet and mellow like this? My weakness.

“As much as I’ve loved staying here, I need to start looking for a new place to live.”

“Any luck on the job hunt this week?” Ethan looked away when he asked. He hated asking. I could tell. But it was a regular routine for me now: go to school; help Ethan out with the pastry techniques he hated so much; circle the Help Wanted ads and follow up with promising leads with either a call or going by in person; and cooking dinner for an exhausted Claire and Ethan at the end of particularly brutal days. Ethan had put in a word for me with Kitterick, but I’d have to wait for something permanent to open up there if I wanted to bank any kind of decent money for an apartment of my own.

“I found a few places who need busboys. One that told me to come by next week because they might have a waiter position open, but otherwise, the job hunting sucks. But I’m going to try again this weekend.”

He leaned back to stare at me. His eyebrows knit together in a thoughtful expression as he trailed his fingers lightly over my collarbones. “You know you can stay here as long as you need to.” He paused and added, “Have you talked to your parents at all?”

Ethan hadn’t asked me until now. He cherished his personal space and allowed both me and Claire to have ours, as well. I knew he cared enough to let me tell him in my own time and way.

I shifted my weight onto my elbow to mirror him. “My mom called once but I let it go to voice mail. All the message said was for me to call so we could talk. Until they apologize, that’s not happening. I haven’t heard from my dad, but I hadn’t expected to.” I leaned closer to him, sighing against his neck. “I still need to get the rest of my stuff out.”

His body tensed against mine. “Claire and I don’t mind you being here, so you don’t have to rush to find anything. Unless you want to.”

I chuckled and tilted my face to his, capturing his lips in a quick kiss. “Thanks, but we both know I can’t stay here forever. But this, being here with you and Claire, is the closest I’ve ever experienced to seeing what a real family is like. So thank you.”

Ethan didn’t say a word. Instead he rubbed circles over the small of my back.

“You probably think that’s stupid, huh?” I couldn’t meet his eyes when I asked the question.

“No, I think it’s shitty your parents never appreciated their son.” He slipped his hand into my jeans and curled his hand around my hip to drag my body closer to him. “It wasn’t always this way for me and Claire. Times were tough when my dad checked out. My mom was hardly home after my dad left because she was working all the time. But I had Claire. She kept me from going crazy most days.”

I tilted my face toward his and smiled. Ethan might be a major pain in the ass sometimes, but he was fiercely loyal to those he loved. “At least you two had each other. My parents traveled, so I was alone a lot. Unless you count the nannies and the house staff. And maybe I would have been okay with that if I’d been able to choose what I wanted. But every day, every activity, every school, every class was mapped out for me.”

Ethan slipped his other hand to the back of my neck, kneading the muscles with his fingers as I sighed with pleasure. “I know it sounds whiny. Poor rich kid crying about not getting what he wanted, right? But when I was younger I wanted to take art right after I’d gone away to prep school, which had to get approval from our parents for our course schedules. I was devastated to find out my chosen elective had been changed to finance for beginners. I was the only thirteen-year-old in a class of juniors and seniors. No one would talk to a kid when they had people their own age to hang out with.”

His hand in my hair tightened slightly then relaxed. “You never told me you were an emo art kid. That’s kinda hot. Please tell me you had a beret.” He snickered.

I laughed too. “Oh, I never was an emo art kid. Well, I might have been emo, just not particularly artistic. Stick figures are my forte. Trust me. I guess I wanted the chance to make my own choices. My true love was always food. I begged the kitchen staff at the school to sneak me in while they were prepping our meals late at night for the next day. They’d let me help out making garnishes and washing dishes. That’s how I figured out I wanted to be a chef. I found the one place I finally felt at home and they didn’t care I was some lonely rich kid.”

“Prep school, huh? For some reason imagining you in the sweater set and tie thing is hot.” He grinned, the humor not quite reaching his eyes.

“Itchy polyester sweaters and ties. Trust me, I’m glad you and I don’t come from the same world. You’re nothing like the people I grew up with. That’s a good thing.”

His eyes ran over my face as he quietly contemplated me before replying. “Something like that.” He cleared his throat and nudged my shoulder. “We probably should get going if we want to make it to school in time for our presentation. If you still want to ride together, that is.”

I reluctantly pulled away from the warmth of his body. “Of course we’re going together. You’d ditch class and make me give the entire thing by myself if I didn’t keep an eye on you. Just promise me you won’t say
fuck
during our presentation today and we should get a decent grade.”

He dragged me back for a kiss, murmuring against my lips, “I’d rather you kept a hand on me at all times. Preferably both of them. And I promise nothing. I’m thinking a few well-placed f-bombs might score us some bonus points.”

I laughed and smacked his wandering hand away. If he touched me, I’d be lost to how good his body felt against mine and we’d never make it to class. Never one to be late in my life, I’d already begun to lapse into Ethan’s routine of getting there with seconds to spare. I should have cared, but spending those last few private moments with him always seemed to win out over my guilty conscience.

I took a moment to watch him stretch, distracted by the way the muscles along his shoulders moved as he gathered the paperwork and graphs. Without turning around, he snorted. “I can tell you’re checking me out. We’ve got thirty minutes before we need to leave. Maybe work out some of our pre-presentation nerves?”

If it was anyone besides Ethan I would have thrown something at him. Instead, I kissed the back of his neck before walking away. I knew if I actually allowed my lips to do what they wanted, we’d be locked in his apartment for much longer than thirty minutes.

“You’re going to make me talk during the presentation, aren’t you?”

I chuckled and continued into his bedroom to get dressed.

“You’re evil, Lassiter,” he called out.

“And you love it, Martin.”