Insane City (49 page)

for the wedding ceremony, then sell it and buy a less expensive ring, plus a house.

After the ceremony they had a picnic reception on the beach, catered by the Majestic Transglobal

Rooster. They drank beer and laughed and told stories and sang and danced in the sand.

As dusk crept over the ocean, Seth saw Laurette standing alone, looking out toward the place where

he’d rescued her. She turned, saw him watching her, and smiled.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Mêci,”
he answered.

Then night fell, and Laurette and Carl took their sleepy children home. One by one, the other guests

also left, except for Duane, who passed out on the beach with Blossom coiled on his chest.

Finally there was nobody left awake but Seth and Cyndi, sitting close together on the sand, the two of

them watching the full moon rise, big and bright, making the restless dark ocean shimmer and shine.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thanks to my wonderful friends and semi-relatives Ron and Sonia Ungerman, who helped me figure out

the plot for this book on a sailboat in the British Virgin Islands, even though by the next morning we’d

forgotten everything.

Thanks to Judi Smith, for always knowing what I’m supposed to do next.

Thanks to Neil Nyren for being the calmest editor alive, and to Ivan Held and Susan Petersen

Kennedy for their unflagging support, not to mention always paying for lunch.

Thanks to Michael Barson and Katie McKee for making book tours feel almost like some sick,

twisted kind of fun.

Thanks to Amy Berkower and the folks at Writers House for their diligence and guidance, and above

all for attaching those little stickers that show where I’m supposed to sign.

Thanks to my friend and bandmate Ridley Pearson, for all the gimlets.

Finally, thanks to the people of the truly insane city of Miami, for making this job easy. Without you,

this book wouldn’t exist; any errors in it are strictly your fault.

Also by Dave Barry

FICTION

Lunatics

(with Alan Zweibel)

The Bridge to Never Land

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Sword of Mercy

(with Ridley Pearson)

Science Fair

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Secret of Rundoon

(with Ridley Pearson)

Cave of the Dark Wind

(with Ridley Pearson)

The Shepherd, the Angel, and Walter the Christmas Miracle Dog

Escape from the Carnivale

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Shadow Thieves

(with Ridley Pearson)

Peter and the Starcatchers

(with Ridley Pearson)

Tricky Business

Big Trouble

NONFICTION

I’ll Mature When I’m Dead

Dave Barry’s History of the Millennium (So Far)

Dave Barry’s Money Secrets

Boogers Are My Beat

Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway

Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down

Dave Barry Turns 50

Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus

Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs

Dave Barry in Cyberspace

Dave Barry’s Complete Guide to Guys

Dave Barry Is
NOT
Making This Up

Dave Barry Does Japan

Dave Barry’s Only Travel Guide You’ll Ever Need

Dave Barry Talks Back

Dave Barry Turns 40

Dave Barry Slept Here

Dave Barry’s Greatest Hits

Dave Barry’s Homes and Other Black Holes

Dave Barry’s Guide to Marriage and/or Sex

Dave Barry’s Bad Habits

Claw Your Way to the Top

Stay Fit and Healthy Until You’re Dead

Babies and Other Hazards of Sex

The Taming of the Screw

Document Outline

• ALSO BY DAVE BARRY
  
• TITLE PAGE
  
• COPYRIGHT
  
• DEDICATION
  
• Chapter 1
  
• Chapter 2
  
• Chapter 3
  
• Chapter 4
  
• Chapter 5
  
• Chapter 6
  
• Chapter 7
  
• Chapter 8
  
• Chapter 9
  
• Chapter 10
  
• Chapter 11
  
• Chapter 12
  
• Chapter 13
  
• Chapter 14
  
• Chapter 15
  
• Chapter 16
  
• Chapter 17
  
• Chapter 18
  
• Chapter 19
  
• Chapter 20
  
• Chapter 21
  
• Chapter 22
  
• Chapter 23
  
• Chapter 24
  
• Chapter 25
  
• Chapter 26
  
• Chapter 27
  
• Chapter 28
  
• Chapter 29
  
• Chapter 30
  
• Chapter 31
  
• Chapter 32
  
• Chapter 33
  
• Chapter 34
  
• Chapter 35
  
• Chapter 36
  
• Chapter 37
  
• Chapter 38
  
• Chapter 39
  
• Chapter 40
  
• Chapter 41
  
• Chapter 42
  
• Chapter 43
  
• Chapter 44
  
• Chapter 45
  
• Chapter 46
  
• Chapter 47
  
• Chapter 48
  
• Chapter 49
  
• Chapter 50
  
• Chapter 51
  
• Chapter 52
  
• Chapter 53
  
• Chapter 54
  
• Chapter 55
  
• Chapter 56
  
• Chapter 57
  
• Chapter 58
  
• Chapter 59
  
• Chapter 60
  
• Chapter 61
  
• Chapter 62
  
• Chapter 63
  
• Chapter 64
  
• Chapter 65
  
• Chapter 66
  
• Chapter 67
  
• Chapter 68
  
• Chapter 69
  
• Chapter 70
  
• Chapter 71
  
• Chapter 72
  
• Chapter 73
  
• Chapter 74
  
• Chapter 75
  
• Chapter 76
  
• Chapter 77
  
• Chapter 78
  
• Epilogue
  
• ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  

Table of Contents

ALSO BY DAVE BARRY

TITLE PAGE

COPYRIGHT

DEDICATION

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46