Lost in You (20 page)

As soon as I hit the pavement I immediately regret walking this way. Cole is leaning against his car
, his arms across his chest and his legs crossed. He looks like he’s posing for the cover of a car magazine. Thing is, if someone took a picture, he’d probably be asked the next day. He has that charisma about him. He can sell you on anything with just his looks. I should know. I paid dearly for it.

I pause when he steps forward. I’m not prepared to deal with him. The last thing I want is to talk to him, especially out in public. I look around for any photographers, wary of what Alex said to me. What if th
is is just all a set up by Ian, some ploy to get Ryan and me apart?

“Looks like you need a ride,” he says with such sincerity that I almost believe he’s an honest person. But then again, I could be over-analyzing everything when it comes to him.

“I’ll walk.” I set down my heels and step into them, surprised that my feet don’t scream in pure agony. I make a mental note to start carrying around a bag. I’ll make it couture or whatever, but something that I can keep some flip-flops in.

“You can’t walk back to
your hotel.”

“Yes, I can.” The first few steps are okay, but the hard concrete and each push of my foot into the toes of my shoes is an unwelcome feeling.

Cole grabs my arm, halting my steps. I pull away, turn and look at him. I hope I’m conveying the right amount of anger. He steps back and holds up his hands.

“I’m just trying to help.”

“You’ve done enough.”

“Babe, come on, we’re going to be working together.” He steps forward. “The long days and nights will be spent with each other. You know how things
get on the road. You’ll get lonely. I’ll get lonely. I know how to make you sing.”

I shake my head. I won’t ever turn to him. I learned my lesson the first time. “Shut up, Cole,” I say as I take a step closer. “I haven’t forgotten what you did. What I said
. How I felt. It’s fresh every time I think about my boyfriend and being away from him. I wonder if he would do the same things that you did while I was away.”

“You never let me explain.”

I throw my hands up and scoff. “I’m not stupid. I know what sex looks like.”

I turn and walk away from him. I was wrong. I can’t work with him. I don’t care if it’s what’s best for my career or not. I’ll quit.

I make it three blocks before I have to pull off my heels. I’m doing more damage by walking in them. I’ll just have to schedule a pedicure tomorrow. I ignore the honking of car horns, knowing better than to turn around. I pull my hair forward, shielding my face from onlookers. The last thing I need is for my picture in the tabloids with some flashy headline about me walking down Sunset with no shoes on.

Or maybe that is exactly what I need. The perfect headline that will send Ian into a tizzy and he’ll have no other option but to give me what I need. Sounds dirty, but I’m willing to play if it means I can be with Ryan
more.

I round the corner that will lead to my hotel. The home stretch, thank God. I have to stop when a car pulls into a parking garage. The window rolls down, the blue eyes I know so well staring at me before his face shows.

“Are you following me?”

He d
oesn’t answer. He gets out of the car and comes toward me. I could yell and scream. Make a scene that brings out the police, but I’m not given any time. He scoops me up, cradling me like he did so many times when we were together. My arms go around him, hanging on for dear life as he swings us around.

The bright flash of light blinds me. The distinct sound of clicking fills my ears. I hide my face in his neck, realizing a second too late what I’ve done.

They’re like vultures, getting closer, blocking Cole’s attempt to get me into the car. He isn’t saying anything, neither of us answering the same question being asked repeatedly. “
Are you back together?”

I scream at the top of my lungs as soon as he shuts my door. I count the seconds until he’s inside. Thir
ty seconds pass and then a minute. I turn and look. Is he talking to them? Are they blocking his way to the door?

He finally opens his door. The flashes start again. They are taking photos of me, shoeless and dirty with road grime. I know I said I didn’t
care, but that was before. Now I’m screwed.

“What the hell was that?”

He shakes his head as he starts his car. He’s careful not to hit any of the paparazzi. If it were me, I’d run them over.

“That was me saving you. I just thought I had more time.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Ian called. Someone saw you walking down the street without your shoes. They told him you were going in and out of different bars and were staggering.”

“Bull crap. No one knew I was out here but you. You set this up.”

He pulls into my hotel and is out of the car before I can protest. My door opens and the valet helps me out. He takes one look at me and smirks.
Jerk
.

Cole follows me in, his hand on the small of my back. I want to push him off, but I owe him a thank you
for saving me. He follows me into the elevator. I take one side, he on the other. I’m not sure why he’s still here. He could’ve gotten off on the next floor, but he’s still with me.

The car dings on my floor and he steps behind me. “What are you doing?” I
ask without turning around. He pushes me forward when the door slides open, directing me down the hall.

My mouth drops when he opens my door. He smiles as he holds it open.

“Ian thinks you’re about to head back east. I’m here to stop you.”

Ryan

I’m avoiding the cafeteria today. It’s not because of the meatloaf or lumpy white pile of gunk that they call potatoes, but because Dylan told me I need to lookup Hadley on the Internet. When I asked her why, she rested her hand on my arm and looked at me like I had just lost my dog.

I thought maybe the usual suspects would be talking about her in class. I tried to pick up on conversations, but no one was saying anything. I resolve that I need to go to the library and find out why Dylan would tell m
e to lookup Hadley.

I sign in at the desk, showing the librarian my student ID and wait for her to assign me a computer.

As I pull out the chair and sit down the machine stares at me, mocks me really, because I don’t know what I’m doing. I haven’t felt the need to search Hadley on the computer before, so why am I here now? I lean my head back and close my eyes. I picture her, in a dress and the cowboy boots she loves so much, leaning up against the oak tree outside of church. I’m standing there with her, my arm above her head. I like that I’m taller than her. I like that she has to look up at me.

We haven’t spoken in twenty-four hours. I’ve ignored her because I’m angry and jealous. I knew this was going to happen. I knew that someone would come along and
show her that I can’t offer her anything. I’m a high school student going nowhere fast. Destined to be a shop foreman like the Stones before me, a family legacy that I have zero desire to be part of. What really sucks is that I’m powerless to stop either from happening.

My phone vibrates in my pocket. I know
it’s Hadley. She knows it’s lunchtime. We talk at this time every day so why would today be any different? Because yesterday she told me she’s going on tour with her ex-boyfriend and not just any ex, but one that she lived with. I know in my haste of being pissed off, I brought up sex. I can’t help it. There are things that I want to try with her, but she doesn’t let me. She stops me each time we’re getting somewhere and I have all these…I don’t know, urges, running through me and when I touch her, they increase and make me feel good. She makes me feel good. I just want to be with her.

I pull out my phone, her gorgeous face smiling at me. I ignore the call. One of these times I’m going to make a mistake
by ignoring her. She’ll just text me that we’re done, that I’m childish and immature and not ready to handle an adult relationship. And she’s right. I am.

My phone vibrates, this time with a text.

I love you, Ryan. I miss you. Please, we need to talk before it’s too late.

Too late?
What the hell does that mean? I hadn’t realized we were on some type of time limit.

Too late for what?

I send the text back. Setting down my phone I shake the mouse to w
ake the computer. Pressing down on the mouse, the Internet window opens up. I type in my name and student ID so I can have access to the web. Everything I do on here will be tracked. I wonder what the principal will think when he sees that I’m searching Hadley Carter.

He won’t think much because all the boys here talk about her, he’ll probably think I’m normal except there isn’t anything normal about me looking for her on the web. I feel like I’m crossing some imaginary line between us.

Her reply pops up.
Call me, please. I want to explain before you see the pictures.

Pictures?
Is this what Dylan was talking about? I look at my phone and the computer, my temperature rising. I’ve never been one to get too angry, but right now I’m on edge. What kind of pictures is Hadley talking about? And Dylan, what’s she trying to tell me? I’m not sure how much more I can take
.
Yesterday it’s the ex and today it’s photos.

I type in her name and hit enter, closing my eyes before anything appears on the screen. I’m about to d
o something I’m going to regret, but I have to know. When I open my eyes, I wish I hadn’t. I wish Dylan hadn’t said anything and that yesterday never happened. I wish I could go back to the night of the concert and tell Dylan no because staring back at me is my girlfriend with her face buried in some guy’s neck while he carries her. Best part, he’s smiling, which tells me she’s not hurt.

I reach for the mouse and click through the images. One labels the guy as Coleman Hollister and says that he and Hadley
are back together.
Back together
. So this is the ex-boyfriend. The one she loved before me, who knows her better than I do. The one I can’t compete with. I bite my lip to stop myself from yelling. My fist slams down on the table, making the computer rattle.

I pick-up my phone, determined to throw it against the wall. Instead I open her message and reply.

TOO LATE!

I storm out of the library, the door slamming against the wall, almost hitting Dylan. I stop and look at her, she’s rubbing her arm, but I don’
t care. I can’t even comprehend what she’s doing here. She knew what I’d find and encouraged me to look. Why would she do that? Does she hate Hadley that much or is she trying to hurt me?

She yells my name as I stalk down the hall. I don’t know if she’s f
ollowing me. I lose myself in the swarm of kids coming out of the cafeteria. Their talking drowns out her voice. I don’t want to talk to her right now, or even see her. I can’t get over the fact that she knew.

My phone goes off again and this time I answe
r it hearing Hadley’s cries. I want to scream and tell her to shut up because I don’t want to hear it.

“Ryan, let me explain.”

“What’s there to explain?” I ask as I push open the front doors of the school. The fresh air feels good. I breathe in, hoping to calm down before I continue this conversation with her. My heart aches knowing this is the last time I’ll talk to her, because even I know cheating isn’t okay.

“Those photos… they aren’t what they seem.”

I laugh. “I may be naïve, Hadley, but I’m not that stupid.”

“I never said you’re stupid. I’m asking you to listen to me so I can explain what happened after you hung up on me yesterday.”

“So this is my fault?” I cross the parking lot and wait for traffic to clear before walking across the street. I don’t know where I’m going. I need to get away from this school and from Dylan and her stupid looks.

“I didn’t do anything wrong!” She says this with such vigor it makes me stop.

“Why me, Hadley, huh?” I’m asking the question that has been plaguing my mind for months now. “Why did you pick me?”

“Why you?
You know this, Ryan. When I first saw you, I felt something and that was without even knowing you. After we met, I knew you were the one for me. I’m in love with you. Why can’t you see that?”

“Because I’m seein
g you in the arms of your ex-boyfriend, the one I just found out about.”

I take a shortcut through the park, keeping off the roads. The last thing I need is for my dad to drive by and see me walking down the street, talking on a cell phone that I technical
ly don’t own and I’m not allowed to have.

“I’m sorry about not telling you earlier about Cole; he’s not a subject that I like talking about and definitely didn’t want to bring him up. Had I known Ian was bringing him on this tour, I would’ve told you ever
ything. I don’t want to keep secrets from you.”

“It’s all excuses, Hadley.”

“For what? I’ve done nothing wrong. Those pictures you saw, I have a feeling I was completely setup by Ian. I walked from his house back to my hotel and right before I got there, Cole showed up and told me that Ian was getting reports of me staggering in and out of bars. The next thing I know he’s picking me up. The flashes started immediately and I hid my face out of reaction, not out of embarrassment. I wish I would’ve punched him or something, but I was too shocked and didn’t realize what was going on until I was already in his car and the questions were being fired at me.”