Perfect Fit: Book 4 of the Fated Hearts Series (28 page)

“Yours.”

I kissed him feverishly to match the increased tempo of my thrusts. Miller’s cock was pinned between our bodies and I knew that the combined friction of our rutting bodies and the angle of my penetration would be enough to send him over the edge. I felt him shaking beneath my body at the same time his ass tightened around my erection. I dug my knees into the mattress and drove into him with everything I had and was rewarded with his shouts of pleasure as he came all over both of us. The slickness of his release and the way his body gripped me inside and out sent me tumbling after him into my climax.

“Welcome to paradise,” Bones whispered against my lips.

We did make a lot of memories in that bed, in the gorgeous shower, in the ocean, and the patio on our villa. We did other things that were non sexual too, like snorkeling, scuba diving, parasailing, and kayaking. Those things just usually got our blood pumping and led to the sexual memory making part of our vacation.

Before I knew it, I was running out of time to ask Miller the question that made my heart thump every time I thought about it. I was down to my final two nights and I wanted to plan something spectacular, but I didn’t know how when we were together all of the time. I woke up before him the next morning and snuck out of our villa like a thief in the night. I made my way to concierge and asked for a recommendation for the best, most romantic restaurant on the island. She helped me make reservations for 6:00 p.m. that evening and I went back to our room after picking up some baked goods as an explanation for where I went.

“Can we just lay around on the beach and be lazy today?” Miller asked when he woke up a short while later.

“Absolutely.”

We alternated between splashing about in the ocean and lazing around on the beach before we climbed back into bed for a long nap. Once again, I woke up before Miller and had a lot of time to panic about the plans I had for that night. I hoped the seaside restaurant, candlelight, wine, and a “yes” answer would lead to the happiest moment of my life.

I decided to get into the shower to wake myself up and get ready for the evening. I had convinced Bones to pack one nice outfit in case we went to a snazzier restaurant. He rolled his eyes at me, but packed dressy clothes anyway. I thought the clothes might need to be pressed and decided I’d need to seek out the assistance of our helpful concierge when I heard the phone in our room ringing.

We had kept our cellphones turned off the entire time we were on vacation. We decided no calls, texts, social media, or news while on the trip. Our friends and Miller’s family knew to call our room if there was an emergency. The ringing of the phone felt like a bad omen and I became cold all over, even though I stood beneath the hot spray of the shower. I shut the water off and wrapped a towel around my waist without bothering to dry off.

Miller answered the phone just as I exited the bathroom. I could hear the hesitation in his voice and saw the worry in his eyes when they met mine. He too knew that something was wrong. His face scrunched up as the person on the other line began to speak. I couldn’t tell what was being said, but I clearly heard a frantic female voice come through the phone.

“Mom, slow down. What’s wrong?” Miller’s voice was firm and urgent. My heart stuttered to a stop and threatened to shatter when I heard his anguished voice say, “No, Mom. No.” His lips began to tremble and his hand that held the phone to his ear shook violently. “That can’t be. They made a mistake. It’s a mistake.” I rushed to his side and wrapped my arms around him, pulling him close to my side. I heard his mother’s voice, but not the words. Miller laid his head against my shoulder and gave into the tears that had been threatening since the moment he answered the call. “I’ll be home as soon as I can. I love you too, Mom.”

I heard his mom disconnect the call on her end, but Miller still clung to the phone. I gently took it out of his hand and hung it up. “What’s wrong, Bones?” It took him several long minutes before he could stop sobbing enough to tell me what had happened.

“Darryl and Destiny were involved in a fatal car accident an hour ago.” The words were ripped out of his chest as he struggled to come to terms with what he’d just learned. “Someone ran a red light and hit them. I can’t believe they’re gone, Jag. They can’t be gone.”

“Where’s Lucas and Lily?” I asked in a panic.

“Darryl and Destiny had just dropped them off at my mom and dad’s house so they could go on a dinner date.” Miller turned his body and wrapped his arms around me. I held him tight and cried with him, because I knew all too well how bad it hurt to lose someone you loved so much. We clung to each for several minutes before he said, “I need to go home, Jag. Please take me home.”

I laid him down on the bed and caressed his face that was red and splotchy from crying so hard for so long. “I’ll make the arrangements,” I told him. “I’ll take care of everything, Bones.” I pushed my sadness aside so I could focus on getting us back home to his family where he was needed.

He laid there quietly as I called the airline and moved our flight to the first available one, which happened to be early the next morning. I called Gray to let him know what had happened and asked him to pick us up at the airport when we arrived. I handed the phone to Miller, because Gray wanted to talk to him, I let his best friend offer him comfort while I packed our suitcases so we could be ready.

I climbed on the bed once I was done and pulled Miller into my arms. We clung to each other and cried out our sorrow. It still didn’t seem real even though I knew it wasn’t just a bad dream. I had known this kind of bone-deep devastation before and knew that only real life could produce this kind of pain.

“Jag.” Miller whispered my name in the dark at some point in the middle of the night. “I am named Lucas and Lily’s guardian in Darryl and Destiny’s wills.” He took a trembling breath before he said, “My life is going to change drastically when we get back. Lucas and Lily have had their whole world turned upside down. I’ll need to make them my first priority.” My heart squeezed painfully in my chest from fear that he was ending our relationship, but his next words shattered that notion. “Please don’t give up on us.”

“Never going to happen, Bones.” I spent the rest of the night telling him how much I loved him and how I’d never give up on us. “I’ll be there with you every step of the way.” I whispered the words against his temple as the sun rose over the ocean.

THE DAYS LEADING
up to Darryl and Destiny’s funeral were spent in a grief-laden fog, with only a few moments standing out in clarity – each one of them involving Jag. I recalled the way he guided me through the airport and the flight home. He never let go of my hand unless he needed his own back to perform a function. He always knew what I needed before I did, whether it be a hug, a hand to hold, or a chest to lay my head on as I tried to come to terms with the fact that I would never see my only brother or his amazing wife ever again. The moment that stood out the most in my mind was the night before the funerals.

I had moved Lucas and Lily into my home, because I just couldn’t stay in David and Destiny’s house right then. It was too raw and I needed to be strong for my niece and nephew who were heartbroken, confused, and scared. I had been holding in my every emotion and it felt like I was going to explode. Just like he had on the previous days, Jag knew exactly what I needed.

“The kids are sound asleep. Urs and Mal are curled up with Lily while Indy is sleeping with Lucas,” Jag said as he got in bed beside me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him. “Talk, Bones. Get it all out, because it’s eating you alive. If you’re angry then scream into your pillow. If you want to cry, then lay your head against me and let it loose. Scared? I’m here to listen. Please don’t pull away from the world like I did, because it’s not the answer. That’s a lonely, horrible existence and not a place you want to go. I’m a big boy so lay it on me.”

I had so many thoughts firing through my brain that it was almost hard to organize them into anything that would make a coherent conversation, but that wasn’t what Jag asked me to do. He didn’t want me to give a prepared lecture, he wanted me to unburden my heart and share with him what I was going through.

“I feel all of those things.” I leaned in as close to him as I could get. “I’m beyond angry, Jag. I’m so fucking furious that I worry I am capable of doing horrible things. What email notification on his phone was so fucking important that it couldn’t wait?” I was referring to the man who ran the red light and struck Darryl’s car. “Senseless, Jag, completely fucking senseless. He is a forty-year-old man, for fucks sake.” I couldn’t remember a time I used the word “fuck” so many times, but it was the only word that could come close to expressing my fury. “I want him to pay, Jag. I’m not sure jail is harsh enough. Then I realize that he has to live with what he did for the rest of his life. He can never escape it or get away from it. Ever. He killed two people in the prime of their lives and stole parents from two young children. The mature, reasonable adult that I can be realizes that no jail or financial penalty will ever bring Darryl and Destiny back so a vengeful mind is a complete waste of energy.” Tears of frustration began to leak from my eyes. “I don’t want to be mature and reasonable about this, Jag. I want to kick his fucking ass.”

“Me too, Bones. Me too.” Jag kissed the top of my head and ran his hand up and down my arm. He didn’t try to tell me I was wrong. He didn’t say any of those clichéd phrases about time healing wounds or one step in front of the other. He did like he said he would – he listened.

“I’m devastated, Jag.” My voice broke from the pain. It seemed like the heart didn’t just break once; it was capable of breaking over and over as grief flowed through my veins in a never-ending loop. “He was my champion, my dragon slayer.” I swallowed hard in attempt to dislodge the emotional knot in my throat. “So many memories of us flash through my mind. The forts we used to build as kids, the tricks we played on each other as teens, and the unconditional way he accepted me when I told him I was gay. Darryl was the absolute best big brother I could ever have and now there’s this gaping hole in my life. I want him back. I want this to be a very bad dream.” Jag repositioned us so that we were laying down instead of sitting up. We rolled so that we were facing each other, so that I was able to feel his arms around me and look into his dark brown eyes. He had lost a brother too so he knew exactly how I felt. I accepted his love and comfort and let them wash over me as I tried to come to grips with my new reality.

“I’m really scared. I’m so afraid of doing the wrong thing for Lucas and Lily.” I wasn’t ashamed to admit my fears to him. There was no judgement in his eyes, only understanding. “What if moving them in here was the worst thing I could’ve done. Maybe they need to be surrounded by their mom and dad’s things, Jag. Maybe I’m being too selfish and not putting their needs first. Being their favorite uncle for the day or the weekend is not the same as parenting. I could really fuck this up.”

“You’re amazing with them, Bones.” Jag’s praise soothed a little of the panic I had been feeling. “Can I make a suggestion though?” He asked hesitantly.