Rainbow Blues (16 page)

Through it all, Ryan hadn’t touched once on whatever had brought him over here. Luke could be patient. Besides, maybe all Ryan needed was company tonight, nothing more sinister than that.

The movie ended predictably, with a monstrous explosion and the guy getting the girl. As soon as the credits rolled, Ryan turned the TV off. Luke turned to him, wondering if he was getting ready to go or if he wanted to talk, but before he could say anything, he suddenly had a lapful of young man, lips on his, and Ryan’s tongue pressing insistently for entrance.

Shock paralyzed Luke for a couple of seconds before he managed to grab Ryan’s shoulders and push him back.

“Ryan? What the….” Ryan was gay? Since when?

Looking flushed, Ryan tilted his head to the side.

“What? You said you were ready to start dating. We went and bought the bed together. But you never called. We can go slow, but not that slow.”

“Ah.” Luke had no words. None. This was a misunderstanding of epic proportions, but he couldn’t figure out how to reject Ryan without humiliating him.

“Jerking off is one thing. Threesomes are quite another.”

Luke’s vision grayed at the edges at the sound of Jimmy’s voice, who’d let himself in as Luke had told him to do.

Jimmy was not amused. Not even a tiny bit, a fact that was confirmed by looking up at Jimmy’s pursed lips and narrowed eyes.

“It’s not a threesome.” Oh by all that’s holy, that was what Luke managed to say? He was stroking out. That was the only explanation.

Judging from Jimmy’s devastated expression, it had sounded even worse to Jimmy than it sounded to Luke.

“Who the hell are you?” Ryan bounced off Luke’s lap—thank God—but proceeded to get in Jimmy’s face like he was spoiling for a fight.

“I’m his boyfriend.”

Jimmy’s glance took in the dirty dishes still sitting at the table, the empty beer bottles, and even though he hadn’t done anything wrong, Luke felt as though he’d cheated on Jimmy. Which was also what Jimmy clearly thought.

This time, Ryan turned a hurt look on him. “It’s been just over a month since you decided to start dating, and you’ve already got a boyfriend? What about buying the bed together? Didn’t that mean anything?”

“You bought the bed with
him
?”

Luke gasped. What the hell was Ryan doing?

“Correction.” Jimmy’s voice was icy enough to drop the temperature in his apartment to almost freezing. “I am his ex-boyfriend.”

Jimmy turned and walked out. Luke had to fix this, because otherwise, his heart might never be whole again.

“LJ, I’m sorry.” Ryan’s face was pinched and white and panicked. “I… I… you gave him a key. Even Zach doesn’t have a key. I’m sorry.”

Luke pointed at the couch. “Sit. Stay. We need to talk.”

Since Zach moved out on his own, Luke hadn’t had occasion to use his disappointed-dad voice, but it came back as naturally as Ryan obeyed it. Which was good. Because he couldn’t worry about Ryan until he’d talked to Jimmy.

Running while it felt like he was having a heart attack was probably not recommended, but he couldn’t let Jimmy go. He couldn’t leave this appalling misunderstanding festering between them. Not for a minute, not for a second, did he want to be the cause of Jimmy’s pain.

At the elevator he caught up to Jimmy, who stood stabbing the button, apparently hoping it would bring the elevator faster.

“Jimmy.”

“Please don’t, Luke. I can’t take it.” His voice cracked, and Jimmy wouldn’t even turn to face him, just hunched his shoulders protectively, like Luke was going to add physical hurt to the emotional one.

“Jimmy, please listen to me. It was nothing, I swear. That was Ryan, my son’s best friend. I didn’t know he was going to come on to me. I didn’t even know he was gay.”

“Wait, that’s your son’s best friend?”

Jimmy finally turned to stare at him, and Luke’s heart wrenched. His beautiful boyfriend’s face was ravaged by tears, eyes red, face wet, and nose shiny.

“Yes. I swear, nothing’s going on.”

“He’s young. Handsome. And now you know he’s gay.”

“It doesn’t matter that he’s gay. He’s practically my kid. I don’t know where the hell that in there came from….” Luke flapped a hand toward his apartment. “But I swear to you, I never put out any signals. I wouldn’t.”

Taking a chance, he stepped closer and placed his palms on Jimmy’s cheeks, gently tilting his head back to make Jimmy look at him.

“Jimmy, I gave you a key, and said you could come by whenever you wanted. Whenever.”

“What about the bed?”

“Good Christ, I don’t know.” Luke thought back to the day he’d shopped for the bed, and the brunch before. “I was going to have Bennett go with me, just because I thought I’d need an extra pair of arms to set it up. But he was busy, and I was out for brunch with Zach and Ryan. I asked them both to help, but Zach couldn’t. Ryan could, so he came with me.”

Fuck. Had Ryan been putting out signals he’d been too oblivious to notice?

“There’s really nothing going on? How come he didn’t know about me?” If it had been anyone else, Luke might have been annoyed at the implication that he was lying. But Jimmy had been burned by cheaters before and… there was no “and.” Luke would get down on his knees and grovel. Anything to keep Jimmy from walking out of his life. To be fair, it had to have looked just terrible. He couldn’t blame Jimmy for remaining uncertain.

“I haven’t told Zach yet.”

Jimmy flinched like Luke had stabbed him. “I thought….”

“I’m not hiding you. I just haven’t actually seen my son since I gave you the key. I haven’t seen him since the day I bought the bed. And it’s important enough I didn’t want to do it over the phone. So there’s no way Ryan could have known.”

“No? Has he been by before?”

“Apart from helping with the bed, no. Usually he’s an extension of Zach.”

His words had Jimmy frowning. Jimmy just had to believe him.

“I swear to you, Jimmy. I would never do that to you. I love you.”

Jimmy sucked in a breath, his lip trembling, and looking more vulnerable than Luke had ever seen.

“I love you too.” Jimmy hiccupped and wracking sobs gripped him. Burying his face in Luke’s neck, he cried. Luke’s own eyes burned in sympathy.

Relief and joy liquefied the bones in his legs, and he crowded Jimmy back so he had a little support as well.

The elevator door opened, and Jimmy stumbled back, Luke following. He hadn’t realized the solid wall he’d pushed Jimmy against was the elevator door.

Jimmy laughed, and if the sound had a hint of hysteria in it, who could blame him? Sliding his hand down into Jimmy’s, Luke pulled him back out of the elevator. No way was he letting Jimmy leave now. The elevator doors slid closed again.

“What you must think of me.” Using the sleeve of his jacket, Jimmy swiped most of the tears away.

“I think you’re an incredible, wonderful man.”

Jimmy snorted. “Who cries at the drop of a hat. I’m sorry I’m so emotional.”

“Don’t be sorry. It’s honest. I like honest. I like knowing what you’re thinking, even if it’s not good. And your ability to express your emotions is probably why you’re such a great actor.”

Luke pulled his boyfriend close, lowered his head, and kissed the salty traces of Jimmy’s tears before placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

Jimmy clutched him close and returned the kiss, but it wasn’t carnal. It was simple, sweet, and filled with perpetual sunshine.

But he couldn’t make out with Jimmy all night. There was some unfinished business waiting in his apartment.

“I have to go talk to Ryan. Clear up this mess.” Even if he had no idea what to say or how it all started.

“Can I go with you?”

“Of course you can. This affects you too. Just don’t be too hard on him. I think he realizes what a bad mistake he made.”

A sharp tug on his sleeve kept Luke from striding back down the hall.

“Um… is your son gay?”

“If he is, he hasn’t told me. My gaydar is terrible, but honestly, I don’t think so. Why?”

“Okay, I could be way off base here, but you and your son look an awful lot alike. You’re gay and your son isn’t.”

That was it. The key he was missing. Finally this whole weird fucking night made sense. “You think he’s got feelings for Zach that aren’t strictly friendly? The poor kid.”

“Yeah, I did that once—fell for a straight guy. It sucks.”

“Well, at least that gives me a hint about how to deal with this. I wonder if he’s even told Zach he’s gay. I’m sure he wouldn’t have told his parents.”

Jimmy shrugged. “Depends on when he started feeling like this, I guess. If it started shortly after puberty, my guess is no.”

“Right. Well, let’s get back there and sort this out with the least embarrassment for all concerned. After, you and me are going to get some sleep in the bed I bought only thinking of you. Got it?”

“Yes, sir!” Jimmy mock saluted him, and Luke couldn’t resist taking just one more quick kiss. He’d have to ask Bennett if Rainbow Blues ever did any dating type events. He’d bet a cutie like Ryan would get snapped up in seconds, and it wasn’t like the entire membership were older guys like Luke.

L
UKE
SMILED
as he entered the sushi restaurant with Jimmy. Sushi wasn’t his favorite, but both Jimmy and Zach loved it, and he wanted them to have some common ground.

It had been over a week since Ryan had made a play for him, and this was the earliest Zach had been free. He hadn’t told Zach about Jimmy, and while he wasn’t sure surprising his son was the best way to break the news to him, he hadn’t been able to come up with anything else.

He glanced over at his sexy boyfriend, and realized Jimmy’s smile was frozen. “Are you okay?”

“Just a little nervous.” Luke grabbed his hand and squeezed, touching Jimmy in public getting easier every time he did it.

“Don’t be. Zach’s a great kid.”

Jimmy’s smile thawed a bit. “I know. I can’t believe you’d have raised a bad kid.”

“I love you,” Luke whispered. It felt so damned good to say, and he loved the heated look it put in Jimmy’s eyes.

“I love you, too.”

Luke scoped out the restaurant and saw his son. Alone. “Surprise. Ryan didn’t come with.”

Jimmy snorted, but he squeezed Luke’s hand. “Not a surprise. Poor kid. He’ll get over the embarrassment sooner or later. It sucks, but we’ve all made passes at the wrong person.”

“I haven’t.”

“You don’t count. You were in the closet most of your life, then I snatched you up before anyone figured out how great you are. And there better be no making passes at anyone but me.”

Oh, Luke could easily obey that edict. He led Jimmy over to Zach.

“Hey, Dad. You never want to come to this place.” Zach smiled up at him, momentarily oblivious to the sexy man attached to his hand.

“Zach, I want you to meet Jimmy.”

Shock passed over his son’s face, but he held out his hand to shake. Jimmy had to disengage their fingers to reciprocate, a fact which Zach did not miss.

He smiled at them both. “Jimmy. Are you my dad’s boyfriend?”

“I am.” Jimmy sounded so fucking happy, just the way Luke liked him.

Once he and Jimmy had sat down and ordered, they covered all the major bases like how he and Jimmy had met, what Zach was doing in school, what Jimmy did for a living.

“What about your family, Jimmy? Do they know about my dad?”

Jimmy nodded before snaring a California roll with his chopsticks. “Yes. Haven’t met him yet. My parents are snowbirds, and aren’t back home yet. I introduced them on the phone earlier this week. And to my brother and sister, who don’t live here anymore.”

Biting into his tempura, Luke had to congratulate himself on how well that had gone. He’d been more nervous talking to Jimmy’s parents than Jimmy was meeting Zach. Probably because Luke’s own parents had been so rigid, unyielding, and not particularly loving. He hadn’t wanted to be that way for his son, but he was a little wary of Jimmy’s parents, afraid they might be too much like his own.

“They loved me,” Luke teased his son. He wasn’t lying, though. Jimmy’s parents had been as sweet and welcoming as Jimmy was.

“Oh really. Jimmy, I guess you share that same hereditary blind spot?”

Jimmy snorted. “Your dad is awesome, but you know that.”

Zach rolled his eyes but smiled at Luke.

Yeah, they did okay.

While they were having their mutual little compliment exchange, a couple walked past their table behind the hostess. The guy stopped abruptly.

“Luke?”

Luke inhaled sharply and coughed. “Oh, hey, Sean. How are you?”

“Good. This is my girlfriend, Cindy. Cindy, this is Luke.”

A pretty blonde woman smiled at him and held out her hand. Luke shook it, all the while feeling like he was speeding madly toward a crossroads he wasn’t sure he was ready for. But he couldn’t just ignore Sean. They’d worked too many jobs together.

“Uh, Sean, this is my son, Zach. Zach, Sean and I started working on the same construction crew together, back in the day, and we’ve worked many jobs together since.”

Zach smiled and greeted Sean while Luke quietly panicked. He hadn’t expected his personal life and work life to collide. Not this soon.