Survival of the Ginnest (16 page)

Dottie
Harris
knows she NEVER refers to The Monster as her baby but
“Wahhh MY BABY IS GROWING UP AND IS AT PRE-SCHOOL TODAY!" This time
next year she may be a wreck.

September 5, 2011 at
7:28

5 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
wants to know if it's the done thing to hit the
"bigger boy" who hit your child at pre-school. By hit, she means
trip over.

September 5, 2011 at
18:29

8 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has a feeling it's going to be one of those nights.
Luckily a week in the sun should fix it.

September 6, 2011 at
21:04

1 person likes
this

Dottie
Harris
had a super (if slightly lacking in sleep) holiday
with her little family. Now if she could just find a way to
convince her husband to buy that villa round the corner from the
beach.

September 12, 2011 at
15:05

7 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
didn't just air-punch as her husband and the kids
left the house. Honest.

September 15, 2011 at
7:05

14 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
feels it's important to inform people that blueberry
poo stains EVERYTHING.

September 19, 2011 at
8:11

5 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has just witnessed The Chubster being to sent to the
hall in her baby walker by a 3 year old for 3 minutes for being
"norty".

September 19, 2011 at
8:39

7 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
loves it when The Chubster pulls a Houdini with tthe
table cloth, a bowl of cereal and a cup of tea. The children were
freshly clean and dressed for school. No. Really. Good job The
Chubs.

September 20, 2011 at
7:45

4 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is amazed what a cheap date her diet is making
her.

September 20, 2011 at
18:54

2 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
- surely 3 is too young to be selecting toys from the
TV that they (you) are going to "buy today”?

September 21, 2011 at
6:48

2 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has said “Well, if you will lie down in front of the
baby walker you've got to expect to be run over by it” too many
times already.

September 24, 2011 at
8:26

19 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has just realised that this time next month she will
have a 1 year old :(

September 25, 2011 at
18:16

1 person likes
this

Dottie
Harris
thinks that if The Monster says he's "too busy" at
meal times one more time she SWEARS that she will melt down on the
floor.

September 26, 2011 at
7:48

7 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is witnessing The Monster eating his breakfast. So
far it has taken more than an hour. The Chubster, on the other
hand, has finished hers and has started grazing her way through the
vegetable rack. *Sigh*

September 26, 2011 at
8:53

5 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
can hear laughter and bangs from the lounge and is
scared what she will find in there.

September 28, 2011 at
6:22

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is mourning Ivan the iPhone. RIP Ivan *raises a glass
of gin.

September 28, 2011 at
19:31

5 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
really shouldn't bake cakes when she's dieting and
not allowed to eat them. *wipes crumbs from chin and
whistles*

September 29, 2011 at
13:08

6 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is working out how childish it would be not to talk
to The Chubster today (because she’s been up every hour from 12.30,
not just for the sake of it).

October 1, 2011 at
7:51

9 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has had a lovely day with The Chubster, The Monster
and The Outlaws! Now for pink wine and sleepy time!

October 1, 2011 at
18:26

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is wondering how a child that refuses to crawl can
cause quite so much carnage across an entire room in hardly any
time at all!

October 5, 2011 at
6:37

7 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has just informed nursery that she WON'T be
collecting The Monster tonight and they can keep the little
toad.

October 5, 2011 at
8:05

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has just been told by a 3 year old that he's not her
best friend any more.

October 7, 2011 at
11:50

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is writing The Chubster’s birthday list. She'd like a
bottle of Henrick’s and some tan leather boots, wouldn't
she?

October 8, 2011 at
15:05

12 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is hiding downstairs, leaving her lucky husband to
deal with the disaster that is bath time.

October 9, 2011 at
17:17

4 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is thinking it's time to talk to her kids about their
sleeping arrangements.

October 10, 2011 at
7:07

2 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
thinks that The Chubster could do with a mute
button.

October 11, 2011 at
6:48

1 person likes
this

Dottie
Harris
can hear the thud thud of a fat baby approaching.
That’s right, FINALLY she crawls!

October 13, 2011 at
7:07

4 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is thinking that The Monster is pushing it. Delaying
opening the bar for the 4th night in a row is NOT a good
idea!!

October 13, 2011 at
19:22

2 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has FINALLY opened the bar.

October 13, 2011 at
19:40

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is being followed around by two loud
children.

October 14, 2011 at
8:38

9 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is a domestic goddess: Crumble baking in one oven,
beef roasting in the other, 2 different children's farms laid out.
Just don't look at the piles of toys spread throughout the
house.

October 16, 2011 at
14:12

10 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
thinks it's a little insulting that The Chubster
keeps picking up the cow from her farm and saying
“Mumma".

October 16, 2011 at
14:26

4 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is wondering if the stairgates are going to be able
to hold The Chubster’s weight much longer?

October 17, 2011 at
8:59

3 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has finally got her poorly baby back to sleep after
nearly 2 hours. She, however, is now wide awake.

October 19, 2011 at
2:28

1 person likes
this

Dottie
Harris
is wondering if there is such a thing as "Boarding
Pre-School". Pass the gin.

October 19, 2011 at
18:01

8 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
is more tired than she ever thought she could be. She
thinks The Chubster might need to take her to buy some winter boots
as an apology.

October 20, 2011 at
7:14

8 people like
this

Dottie
Harris
has had to separate the children because The Chubster
was beating up The Monster. Isn’t it meant to be the other way
around?

October 20, 2011 at
16:28

4 people like
this

Dottie
Harris -
Note to all parents who have those pens with
magnets at the end: Check your radiators before you turn them on
*cleans up massive ink slide*

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