Survival of the Ginnest (12 page)
Read Survival of the Ginnest Online
Authors: Aimee Horton
Tags: #family, #social networking, #humour, #parenting, #motherhood, #gin, #motherhood humor, #gin and tonic, #parenting and families, #motherhood humor kids, #motherhood book, #motherhood fun, #motherhood humour
December 5, 2010 at
8:50
5 people like
this
Harris
would like to thank Ocean Finance
for their fish tank television channel screen saver. It appears to
be the equivalent to white noise for The
Chubster!
December 6, 2010 at 9:03
2 people like
this
Harris
is wondering if every time The
Monster has an afternoon nap, he has to do it on the
landing.
December 6, 2010 at 13:14
5 people like
this
Harris
is being played by a 6 week old.
Sobs uncontrollably in her chair, coos and smiles in her arms.
She’s a sucker for the coos.
December 7, 2010 at 14:29
6 people like
this
Harris
doesn't seem to remember a time
where she didn't have sick on her.
December 8, 2010 at 8:39
3 people like
this
Harris
just turned round from doing the
washing up to find a small naked child dancing to
Boogie Beebies
. He even
managed to undo the poppers on his vest!
December 8, 2010 at 8:58
4 people like
this
Harris
regrets telling The Chubster that
she likes newly washed and ironed bedding, as she now obviously
thinks it's her duty to ensure hers gets washed
daily.
December 9, 2010 at 4:08
2 people like
this
Harris
-
Pizza.Gin.Done.
December 9, 2010 at 19:53
3 people like
this
Harris
thinks she needs a new haircut.
Maybe not something to be worrying about whilst being thrown up
on.
December 11, 2010 at 6:03
1 person likes
this
Harris
is loving The Monster "driving to
work" on the car shaped bathmat.
December 13, 2010 at 9:22
3 people like
this
Harris
would quite like to smack perky
Katy from
I Can Cook
around the face, maybe with a frying pan.
December 13, 2010 at 10:22
7 people like
this
Harris
has had the nightly task of
deciding between gin or wine. This time she chose
wine.
December 14, 2010 at 20:13
5 people like
this
Harris
- my daughter has just thrown up in
my mouth.
December 14, 2010 at 20:13
9 people like
this
Harris
is not loving that The Monster can
now climb out of his travel cot. She discovered this while at her
Mummy's where she was intending to be looked after while she drank
wine!
December 17, 2010 at 19:52
2 people like
this
Harris
thinks it's time to put the kids on
eBay. The question is, bundle package or single
items?
December 18, 2010 at 7:16
4 people like
this
Harris
is regretting buying The Monster
some pants and showing him. It's going to be messy as he refuses to
wear his nappy now :(
December 19, 2010 at 8:40
1 person likes
this
Harris
hasn't seriously thought about
locking The Monster in the garage this morning. Nope. Not at
all.
December 20, 2010 at 8:34
3 people like
this
Harris
is doing bath and bedtime solo and
counting down the minutes and seconds.
December 21, 2010 at 18:24
1 person likes
this
Harris
is trying to watch
Finding Nemo
but is
getting a running commentary from a small boy.
December 22, 2010 at 13:56
7 people like
this
Harris
is wondering if Santa will miss the
port that the kids have left out for him.
December 24, 2010 at 19:18
1 person likes
this
Harris
is secretly gutted The Monster
hasn't woken up and found his stocking and Santa presents on the
landing yet.
December 25, 2010 at 6:13
1 person likes
this
Harris
would like to suggest that all
people who buy toys that need batteries that aren't AA should
supply them to avoid disappointment (from The Monster, not Mummy -
the game looks like a nightmare).
December 25, 2010 at 17:10
2 people like
this
Harris
isn't ashamed to admit she is
possibly enjoying The Monster’s new farm as much (if not more) than
he is!
December 25, 2010 at 17:51
1 person likes
this
Harris
is a wee bit roly-poly after all
the food she’s eaten these last few days!
December 28, 2010 at 19:24
1 person likes
this
Harris
can’t believe it’s nearly 2011,
have a good one folks x
December 31, 2010 at
21:55
19 people like
this
2011
Harris
thinks her daughter missed the “Lie
in so Mummy can avoid a hangover” memo.
January 1, 2011 at
6:55
3 people like
this
Harris
has a love hate relationship with
bread. She loves to eat it but hates the fact it makes her
fat.
January
2, 2011 at 20:22
2 people like
this
Harris
has just realised all her radios
are tuned to Classic FM. Old :(
January
3, 2011 at 18:55
3 people like
this
Harris
is trying to decide what to do with
herself and The Chubster today. Clearing out clothes? Food
shopping? Finishing off the Christmas chocs with all new
America’s Next Top Model
?
January
4, 2011 at 8:47
1 person like
this
Dottie
Harris
is having cold sweats - she appears to have run out
of gin :(
January 4, 2011 at
19:31
3 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
- Note to self. Do not cross-thread bottle and nearly
drown child.
January 9, 2011 at
4:46
4 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
has been trying on bikinis and has just been asked by
her son why she has “two bottoms”. 11 weeks to build back that
shattered bit of confidence then.
January 9, 2011 at
19:14
9 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
really wishes she hadn't found The Monster "tucking"
the cat into the sofa with her new cushions :(
January 10, 2011 at
8:30
7 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
thinks that a bit of sleep and Starbucks coffee in
the machine makes her very productive. Kids’ clothes sorted, dinner
in slow cooker, two rounds of washing done and five tantrums
avoided.
January 10, 2011 at
10:58
6 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
was going to make a curry for dinner, but is now
wondering if she can use The Chubster’s jabs as an excuse to order
pizza.
January 11, 2011 at
17:11
2 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
is secretly wondering if she can get The Chubster her
jabs every day as she slept from her 11.30 bottle to 7.15.
Whoooppppeeeeee
January 12, 2011 at
7:59
6 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
must not think about what shoes she's going to buy
when she sells her son.
January 12, 2011 at
18:29
1 person likes
this
Dottie
Harris
doesn't want to jinx it but 11.30-7.45.
January 13, 2011 at
8:26
6 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
is tidying up the lounge and so far has found a toy
rake, a toy chair, various half eaten chocolates and a couple of
snotty tissues all stored away in various nooks and crannies.
Favourite place so far is behind the sofa.
January 13, 2011 at
9:47
3 people like
this
Harris
wants to know who told The Monster
there was A MONSTER outside the skylight on the
landing.
January
13, 2011 at 18:03
9 people like
this
Harris
wonders who the lady from
Mighty Mites
slept with
to sing on the theme tune of her own show.
January
14, 2011 at 11:07
6 people like
this
Harris
is drinking gin (or as The Monster
refers to it: ”Mummy Juice”) and considering an Eric the Elephant
and then bed!
January
14, 2011 at 21:16
1 person likes
this
Harris
is in bed with her ENTIRE family
and is being body slammed by a toddler.
January
15, 2011 at 8:24
3 people like
this
Harris
wonders if it's too early to have a
whiskey, to cure her cold, of course.
January
17, 2011 at 7:51
1 person likes
this
Harris
is finding watching The Monster
stab his peas and eat them one by one to be one of the most painful
experiences of her life.
January
17, 2011 at 12:45
12 people like
this
Harris
thinks bath time running over
schedule only means one thing: The bar will be open
late!
January
17, 2011 at 18:24
3 people like
this
Harris
has 14 days until she's back to the
real world!
January
17, 2011 at 21:06
2 people like
this
Harris
is enjoying a peaceful cup of tea
with the small fat one while the small horrid one is shipped off to
school and the tall farty one is on the way to
work.
January
18, 2011 at 8:41
11 people like
this
Harris
is going to sit in the shed to
drink her wine if The Monster doesn't stop screaming on the
landing. It's not a restful drinking experience!
January 18, 2011 at
19:38
6 people like
this
Dottie
Harris
is listening to her youngest snoring again. Not sure
she can kick her until she rolls onto her side like she does her
Daddy.