That McCloud Woman (20 page)

Jack
reached the top of the stairs and turned for Billy's room, then stopped. He was
leaving, but he couldn't leave without saying goodbye to all the kids.

He
crossed to the first room, the nursery that he'd helped Alayna set up. He
tiptoed across the room to the crib. Bending over, he laid a hand on Meggie's
narrow back, feeling the rhythmic beat of her heart beneath his palm. He closed
his eyes and inhaled deeply, filling his senses with the scent of baby powder
and innocence, those sweet, sweet smells associated with an infant.

She
shifted beneath his hand, and flopped her head over, turning her face to the
opposite cheek. In the glow of the night-light, he stared at her profile. The
bud of a nose. The puckered lips. The sweep of lashes against her cheek. The
tiny shell of her ear. Leaning closer, he pressed a kiss to her cheek, then
withdrew, placing a finger against the spot he'd kissed, as if to seal it.

"Goodbye,
Meggie," he whispered. "Sweet dreams."

He
dug a wooden doll from the sack and set it on the changing table, then left
quickly and slipped into the next room. Molly was asleep on her side, her chin
resting on the top of Teddy's head. He brushed a finger across the blond curls
that feathered her cheek. Such a sweet face, he thought, staring at her. Such a
brave little girl, he reflected, thinking of all the nights she'd stayed alone
with no one but Teddy to keep her safe.

He
remembered the night she'd sent Teddy to him, knowing what a sacrifice that had
been for her. He remembered, too, the kiss she'd given him, the feel of her
little body pressed against his legs when she'd wrapped her arms around his
thighs and clung.

He
leaned over and brushed a kiss on her cheek, then slowly withdrew, setting each
feature to memory. "Be safe, Molly," he whispered. Reaching into the
sack, he pulled out the high chair he'd made for Teddy and propped it on the
floor beside the bed. He rubbed a finger beneath his nose as he stole one last
look and told himself he wouldn't cry. He sniffed before he made a liar out of
himself and turned for the hall.

In
Billy's room, he paused and drew in a deep breath, knowing that this goodbye
might well be the hardest. He crept to the bed, holding the sack in one hand
and leaned over.

Billy
popped up and they bumped heads.

"Jeez,"
Jack muttered, rubbing his sore forehead. "What have you got in there?
Rocks?"

Billy
stretched to turn on the bedside lamp, then flopped back against his pillow,
grinning. "Nah. Just a lot of brains."

Jack
chuckled and dropped down on the side of the bed, still rubbing his forehead.
"Yeah, right." He cut a glance at Billy, frowning. "What are you
doing awake at this hour?"

Billy
shrugged. "I never sleep." At Jack's skeptical look, he added,
"Well, not much." Seeing the sack, he crawled to Jack's side and
plopped down on the edge of the bed beside him. "Whatcha got in
there?" he asked, peering at the sack curiously.

Jack
lifted the sack, then let it drop. "Just something I picked up in
town."

"Something
for me?" Billy asked, leaning farther over for a better look.

Jack
caught him by the collar of his pajamas and hauled him back onto the bed before
he fell to the floor. "Yeah, something for you."

"What
is it?"

Jack
handed him the sack. "See for yourself."

Billy
opened the sack and stuck his head inside. "Oh, dude!" he whispered.
"This is too cool." He pulled the sack from over his head and shoved
a hand inside, fishing to the bottom of the sack. He withdrew the gift and held
it up. "A tool belt," he said, staring at it in awe. "Is this
really for me?" he asked, turning to look at Jack.

Not
trusting his voice, Jack nodded.

"Cool!"
Billy hopped up to stand on the mattress and whipped the belt around his waist,
bending his head over so he could see to fasten it in place. He lifted his
head, and a grin split his face from ear to ear. "Thanks, Jack," he
said, and held up his hand.

Jack
slapped it with his own, then stood. "Now hop back into bed before Alayna
catches you up and skins both our heads."

Billy
dropped to his bottom, laughing as he bounced on the mattress. "She won't
be mad," he said. "We made a deal. I can stay awake as late as I want
just so long as I stay in my bed." He grinned impishly up at Jack.
"And I'm
in
my bed."

Jack
shook his head, chuckling, and reached to ruffle Billy's hair. "Well, I'm
not, so I guess I'd be the one to get my head skinned." He pulled back the
covers. "Now in you go," he ordered. Billy flopped down on his back
and Jack pulled the sheet over his chest. He switched off the lamp and started
to withdraw. Billy stopped him by calling his name.

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"Are
you leavin' or something?"

Jack
pressed his lips together and nodded. "Yeah, Billy. I'm leaving."

"Why?"

Jack
lifted a shoulder. "My work here's all done."

"I'll
bet Alayna'd let you stay if you asked."

Jack
shook his head. "No. It's time I moved on."

"Will
you come back and see us?"

Jack
thought he heard tears in the boy's voice, but couldn't be sure. "I don't
know, Billy."

Billy
slipped down lower on his pillow, drawing the sheet to his chin. "Don't
you like us?"

Jack
had to suck in a deep breath before he could answer that one. "Yeah,
Billy, I like you just fine. But—well, it's just time for me to move on."
He bent over, lifting a hand to give Billy a high five. Billy lifted his hand,
too, but before his hand touched Jack's, he jack-knifed from the bed and threw
himself against Jack's chest. "I don't want you to go," he sobbed.
"I want you to stay here with us."

Strangled
by the tears that gathered in his throat, Jack hugged the boy tight against
him, sure that his heart was going to break. Slowly, he peeled Billy's arms
from around his neck. He guided him back beneath the covers and smoothed a hand
across his forehead. "I wish I could, Billy," he whispered. "I
wish I could."

He
straightened, and took a step back. "Now you stay out of trouble, you hear
me?"

"Yessir,"
Billy mumbled, then sniffed.

"And
you take care of Alayna and the girls, all right?"

"I
will."

"Bye,
Billy," Jack whispered as he backed from the room.

"Bye,
Jack," he heard the boy whisper in return.

Ten

«
^

J
ack opened his
eyes, instantly awake. Someone was in the cabin. He listened for another sound,
wondering if he had time to grab the whiskey bottle beneath his bed to use as a
weapon. He heard a soft footstep behind him, and cursed his habit of sleeping
with his back to the door. He knew that if it came to a fight, he'd have to
rely on his hands. There wouldn't be time to go for the bottle.

He
felt the mattress dip behind him and he rolled to his side with a feral growl,
his hand fisted and ready to throw a punch. He managed to stop his hand inches
from a shadowed face that looked all too familiar.

"Alayna?"

She
shrank away from him, eyeing the doubled-up fist inches from her nose.
"Y-yes," she whispered, then laughed nervously. "It's me."

Jack
dropped his fist to the mattress with a groan, then
shot her a frown.
"Don't you know it's not safe to sneak up on a sleeping man that way? I
could've broken your nose."

She
pulled back the covers and slipped beneath them. "But you didn't."

There
was just enough moonlight coming through the window that he could see her face.
Not clearly, but enough to see that she was smiling.

"What
in the hell do you think you're doing?" he asked as she curled a foot
around his bare leg.

Her
smile drew nearer. "I came to seduce you," she whispered and he would
swear that was liquor he smelled on her breath.

"Seduce
me," he repeated, staring at her as if she'd just grown two horns.

"Yes,
seduce you." She snuggled closer, laying a hand on his bare thigh and
stroking.

He
jerked his leg back, knocking her hand away. "Are you drunk?"

She
laughed, sitting up to toss her hair back over her shoulder, then rested her
cheek on her palm. "I remember asking you that one time."

Jack's
frown deepened. "Yeah, I remember that, too. But I wasn't drunk."

"I'm
not, either."

He
peered more closely at her, squinting to better see her face in the darkness.
"Are you sure?"

"Yes.
I'm sure. I only had two margaritas."

"Two
margaritas," he repeated, then cocked his head to look at her
suspiciously. "Is that what you and your cousins were doing in the kitchen
till all hours of the night? Drinking margaritas?"

She
nodded her head. "That and talking."

He
narrowed an eye at her. "And where are your cousins now?"

"Well,
Merideth and Mandy went home, but Sam stayed."

"She's
at the house?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because
she drew the shortest straw."

Jack
heaved a frustrated breath. "No. I mean, why is she still at the
house?"

"Well,
I couldn't very well leave the children in the house alone."

Jack
suddenly felt as if a spotlight had been turned on his bed and he had an
audience of three women waiting for his performance. He knew how women loved to
talk. "And your cousins knew you were coming over here to seduce me?"
He waited, praying he'd misunderstood her and dreading hearing her answer at
the same time.

"Well,
yes," she replied hesitantly. "It was their idea."

Jack
groaned, and buried his face in his hands. It was worse than he'd thought.

Alayna
sat up. "And what is wrong with their plan? I thought it was rather
clever, myself."

He
opened his hands enough to get a look at her face to make sure that she was
serious. "Clever? You think
this
is
clever?"

Alayna
flipped back the covers and flounced from the bed. She whirled, hands on hips.
"Yes, clever," she snapped peevishly. She tossed out a hand,
gesturing toward the house. "With three innocent children in my house, I
couldn't very well invite you to spend the night with me. And I couldn't leave
them alone, either." She folded her arms beneath her breasts. "This
seemed the perfect solution."

Jack
wished now that she had stayed in the bed, then
maybe he wouldn't have noticed
that she was wearing that blue robe of hers. The one that matched her eyes. And
he wouldn't have gotten that peek of her breasts, either, when she'd flung out
her arm, pointing toward the house. But with her standing right in front of the
window with moonlight spilling over her form, he saw it all.

He
covered his face with his hands again, groaning, then scraped his fingers up
over his face and back through his hair. "The perfect solution for
what?" he asked, striving for patience.

Tears
flooded her eyes. "I wanted to make love with you again before you left,
and I couldn't think of a way—"

Jack
held up a hand, interrupting her. "Before I left? You knew I was
leaving?"

She
nodded.

Jack
sighed, dropping his hand to the mattress, and his gaze there, as well. He
rubbed the ball of his thumb across the cotton sheet. "I was going to tell
you in the morning."

"You
don't owe me an explanation. I—"

Jack
held up his hand again, but this time he motioned her toward the bed.

Though
she did so with reluctance, Alayna moved to the side of the bed. Jack stretched
across the width of mattress that separated them and took her hand, drawing her
down beside him. "Yes, I do," he said, wearily, staring at their
joined hands. "I should have told you before now, but—well, I couldn't."
He lifted his gaze to hers. "I have to go, Alayna. It's time for me to
move on."

She
nodded, tears clotting her throat. "I—I know."

Jack
wagged his head. "No, I don't think you do." He inhaled deeply,
searching for the words. "I didn't want to care," he said slowly.
"I thought I could just do my job without getting involved. But I
couldn't." He firmed his lips and glanced back over his shoulder to the
window and the house beyond. "Billy and Molly and then Meggie." He
wagged his head again, then turned to stare at their hands. He laced his
fingers through hers, unlaced them, then laced them again. Finally he lifted
his head, squeezing her fingers between his. "It hurts, Alayna. And I
don't want to hurt anymore."

Tears
streaming down her cheeks, Alayna leaned over, smoothing a hand tenderly across
his cheek. "I know, Jack. And I understand. I really do."