The Fighter Pilot's Baby: A BWWM Military Pregnancy Romance (14 page)

After taking her
blood pressure and a few other vitals, the doctor got right down to
the exam. She wheeled in the portable ultrasound and Bianca’s
heart almost stopped, the images of her empty womb flashing through
her mind.

“Relax,
Bianca,” Dr. Gabriel said, patting her arm. “Worrying
won’t help anything.”

Bianca took a deep
breath and laid back, staring at the ceiling.

“Let’s
take a look at this baby,” the doctor said, beginning the
ultrasound.

Bianca took some
more deep breaths but didn’t say anything. After several
moments the doctor spoke.

“How far along
did you say you were?” She asked Bianca.

“I think eight
weeks,” Bianca answered, nerves creeping in. Was something
wrong?

“Well, this
definitely doesn’t look like an eight week fetus,” Dr.
Gabriel answered and Bianca’s heart sank. It was happening
again.

“What, what
does that mean?” She asked, unable to mask her panic. Maybe it
was wrong of her to not tell Alex. She suddenly wanted him there to
catch her when she fell apart. Again.

“I’d say
this fetus is at least ten weeks. Sometimes a miscarriage can throw
off your cycles,” Dr. Gabriel replied.

Bianca’s
head snapped up, the tears that began to fall on their own,
dried
almost instantly. “What did you say?”

“I said,
you’re ten weeks pregnant. Congratulations, Bianca.”

Bianca released the
breath she was holding, a smile spreading across her face. She was
finally pregnant and this time her baby was okay. A sudden idea came
to her about how to tell Alex. It was going to be a Merry Christmas
after all.

Alex pulled into the
driveway at Bianca’s house. He was so angry that she lied, his
face felt like it was on fire and his blood pressure was probably
through the roof. Taking a deep breath he rang the bell. That wasn’t
what he usually did since he had a key, but seeing as how Bianca was
lying to him about where she was, he didn’t think he’d be
keeping it for much longer. There was a light on in the living room
that he could see through the window. He knew that was on a timer
however and he didn’t see any other lights on in the house. He
knocked, hard. After ten minutes and still no answer Alex deduced
that Bianca wasn’t at home. It was after five and he texted
with her hours ago. Where the hell was she? The possibility that she
was seeing someone else behind his back popped into his head;
something he pushed far out of his brain until that moment. Where
else would she be so late?

Deciding
to let himself in anyway, Alex produced the key from his coat pocket
and unlocked the door. Monster rushed to
greet
him, another sign that Bianca wasn’t home. Alex leaned down to
scratch behind his ears before moving through the house to see if
Bianca was in fact out. As he wandered around he noticed that it
seemed Bianca wasn’t home most of the day. There were few
dishes in the sink; the ones they used for breakfast and the house
looked as it did when he left that morning. Worry suddenly began to
overtake his anger and he sprinted back towards the door, determined
to find out what the hell was going on.

*****

Bianca watched as
the gift she picked out to announce her pregnancy was engraved with
the words ‘Merry Christmas Daddy.’ Her heart swelled with
joy and her hand flew to her lower abdomen, where there was still no
visible bump, as she smiled widely at the clerk. It had been a long
day and despite the exhaustion that was eating at her, Bianca knew
she had to get the present tonight. Alex would be glued to her for
the next few days as they prepared for their first Christmas together
and she needed the alone time to pick out the perfect gift. Luckily
it came to her as she was pulling into a parking spot at the mall.
Practically bouncing from foot to foot, Bianca waited impatiently for
the clerk to finish. When she was done she gathered her gift and set
out for home.

Just as she was
climbing into her car her phone buzzed.

Andrea:
Alex is looking for you. He called me.

Panic seized Bianca.
He couldn’t find out this way, she wanted it to be perfect,
especially after what they went through, it had to be. Snagging her
phone from the passenger seat she dialed Andrea as she clicked on her
Bluetooth.

“What’s
going on?” Bianca asked, her hands gripping the steering wheel
so tightly it hurt.

“I’m not
sure. He called me about two hours ago looking for you. I was getting
baby Jay down for a nap otherwise I’d have texted you sooner.
Jason just got home from work so I had a free moment.” Andrea
said quickly.

“He didn’t
respond when I texted him back but I didn’t have time to think
about it because the doctor came in. I hope he isn’t mad,”
Bianca replied picking up speed. She had to get home before Alex got
there.

“He sounded
mad,” Andrea said, “How did the appointment go?”
She added warily.

“Great! I
forgot to tell you. She did an ultrasound and I’m ten weeks
pregnant. Andrea I’m so happy. She told me at this point and
with my symptoms there was little chance of miscarrying. I feel so
relieved.” Bianca gushed, telling Andrea all about her
appointment.

She hung up the
phone just as she pulled into the driveway. Alex’s car wasn’t
there and she breathed a sigh of relief. She had to hide the gift
before he got there. Walking in, she realized that it was awfully
late and Alex probably should have been there. Sighing with worry,
she pulled out her phone. With all of the excitement earlier she
didn’t even think about the fact that he hadn’t called or
texted her back. A frown creased Bianca’s brow as she dialed
Alex’s number. After two rings it went to voicemail. She tried
again and the same thing. Finally she texted him that she was home
and he could come over whenever he was ready, not that he needed an
invitation. Once she fed Monster, she headed upstairs and changed
into her pajamas. Her bedtime routine was completed and still no word
from Alex. Getting nervous, Bianca tried calling him again.

“Where are
you!?!” He yelled at her as soon as he answered.

“Uh,
hi to you too,”
she
said a bit put off by his tone.

“Well? Are you
going to answer me?” He snapped.

Bianca pulled the
phone away from her ear, reeling at the way Alex was speaking to her.
He had never spoken to her that way before and she knew something was
off.

“Alex, calm
down. I’m at home.” She said calmly, trying not to
escalate the situation. Clearly something was wrong.

“Don’t
tell me to calm down. Where have you been all day? I was just at your
house and you weren’t there. Now all of a sudden you’re
home. How do I know if you’re even telling the truth?” He
continued to shout at her angrily.

“What?!”
Bianca exclaimed, clearly trying to keep calm was out the window.

“I’ve
been trying to find you since two o’clock when you texted me
that you were out shopping an hour away with Andrea. Which was
clearly a lie since Andrea didn’t even know where you were. So
where were you, Bianca and who were you with?”

Bianca gasped; did
he think she was cheating on him? What was going on? She went out for
a few hours and Alex thought she was lying to him. How would this
relationship work without trust? Maybe her miscarriage broke them and
they would never be able to fully heal?

“Alex, please
slow down. I wasn’t with anyone. Just come over so we can
talk…”

“I don’t
want to talk right now. You’ve been shutting me out for weeks
since you lost the baby and now I can’t even get a hold of you
during the day and I find out you’re lying to me about where
you’ve been. This miscarriage devastated me just as much as it
did you and I’ve done nothing but wait around for you to heal
so we could move on. But it doesn’t seem like you want to move
on, Bianca. Two steps forward and one step back. I gave up a
promising career in the Air Force for you and this charade of a
relationship,” He sighed, his voice getting lower and lower
with each word he spoke.

Bianca laid her head
back against the headboard. She had no idea he felt that way and
hearing it now caused her to second guess the timing of this
pregnancy. He would be angry and think she did it on purpose to
replace the baby they lost. Bianca suddenly felt sick to her stomach
and it wasn’t from the pregnancy. Why not let him go now and
let him be happy with someone else? He obviously wasn’t happy
with her and if he found out she was pregnant again he would try to
make it work because he was a good guy.

Sighing, Bianca
began, trying to keep the tears from her voice, “Alex, I’m
so sorry. I didn’t know you were feeling that way. You never
told me and you could have. I don’t know what else to say.”
She stopped, clearing her throat to break up the lump that gathered
there, “If you want a break from me, from us, I’ll
understand.”

Silence greeted her
on the other end and she almost wondered if the phone had
disconnected.

“If
that’s what you want, Bianca then I don’t see any other
reason to stick around,”
he
muttered softly, sounding defeated.

Bianca almost yelled
at him, that no, she didn’t want that, but it was better this
way. He would go on to find someone who made him happy not lonely and
lied to.

“Goodbye,
Alex,” Bianca croaked, stifling a sob.

“Goodbye,
Bianca, “Alex all but whispered.

The
line went dead and Bianca
laid
down on the bed, still clutching the phone to her chest. Just when
she thought they were finally going to be happy and have a family she
had to go and ruin the one good thing that ever came her way.

*****

Alex hung up the
phone and almost threw it against the wall of his apartment. What the
hell just happened? Did they break up? Running a hand over his face,
the stubble rasping against his hand, Alex wondered why he even
agreed to let Bianca call it quits. One minute he was running around
frantic trying to find her and the next it was over. But why? He only
half meant what he said to her. The miscarriage did break him down
but despite her pulling away at first, it seemed she was trying
harder to be her normal self. The last few days were weird though and
it seemed like he was losing her all over again. The thought that she
was with someone else made Alex want to smash a hole in the wall. Why
else would she lie to him about where she was? Why else would she be
acting so strangely?

Alex began to pace
around the room, feeling like a caged animal. He wanted Bianca, that
was for damn sure, but did she still want him? He would get to the
bottom of this one way or another, even if it meant losing her
forever. Maybe it was for the better. Alex shook his head. No, Bianca
was the only woman he wanted but how did he mend what he just broke?

*****

Bianca woke up, the
sun shining in her eyes through the window, and frowned when she
remembered what had happened the night before. Her head was pounding
and she knew it must be from crying off and on all night. Sitting up,
she winced, her head not wanting her to move. Placing a hand over her
eyes, she flopped back down. Why get up anyway? It’s not like
she had anything to do. School was out for winter break and her class
semester had ended. All she wanted to do was lie in bed and mope.
Thinking about Alex again, Bianca sucked in a breath, trying not to
cry. She was sure her head would explode if she did. Finally managing
to force herself from bed, Bianca swallowed two Tylenol with a coffee
chaser and then curled on the couch with the remote. She aimlessly
flipped through the channels until she found a mind numbing romance
movie about Christmas and settled back to watch it. After about
thirty minutes her head began to droop, and fearing she’d spill
coffee all over her light colored carpets she set it down and
reclined on the couch, tucking the blanket under her chin. Within
minutes she was asleep, the Christmas program forgotten.

When Bianca woke,
the TV was off and her coffee cup removed from the side table. An
eerie feeling of not being alone crept over her and she jumped from
the couch when she heard footsteps in the kitchen.

“It’s
okay, Bianca it’s just me,” Alex said, walking in from
the kitchen.

“Alex? What
are you doing here?” Bianca asked with confusion. Was last
night all a dream?

A shadow of regret
passed over Alex’s face but then was gone in an instant. “I
came to check on you. After last night…” He trailed off.

“Oh. Thanks.
I’m okay, really. I’m sorry to have put you through so
much upset. I didn’t know you would be so angry.” Bianca
apologized.

Seeing him was
making her insides hurt. She wanted him to leave so that she could
move on without him, just her and the baby. There was no reason to
put him through any more traumas and Bianca was being selfish
thinking that maybe she could fix what she broke in the first place.
If only she didn’t lose the other baby… No, she wouldn’t
go down that road again. What was done, was done. She couldn’t
change it and neither could Alex, but what she could do was protect
him. He wasn’t happy with her, he said it himself, so why was
he here?

Alex nodded at her
response and headed towards the door. The last two days were so
strange and Bianca wished it was a dream she could wake up from.

“Okay then,”
he said, pulling the door open.

“I’m
sorry, Alex,” Bianca said as he walked out and closed the door
behind him.

Despite her best
efforts to maintain her composure, Bianca crumbled and began to sob.
So much for being done with crying.