The Ironwood Collection of Alpha Moves (4 page)

And that goes for the bedroom, too.  Quit being so . . .
gentle
.  I mean,
she's already decided to screw you
–
you don't have to worry about her scampering off (unless you try to surprise her with something . . . y'know,
too kinky
without prior notice). 

So if she's there, she's ready,
and
she's naked, as soon as you think it's right
you get on top of her and you go CONAN on her ass.
  Do her like it's the night before your four-year prison sentence begins.  Do her like they're revoking your cock for thirty days.  Do her like you fucking
mean
it . . .
because if you don't, then she
thinks
you don't
.  And that's never a good thing.

I’m sure that doesn’t sound very
"respectful".  But then,
the idea that women value respect over admiration and desire is a relatively new phenomenon
, and despite some claims to the contrary, there are plenty of women who want less respect and more passionate desire in their lives.  Even if that means accepting the fact that you are the Man, and forgetting all about equality for a while.

Consider, Dude:
what's the most popular book on Amazon.com?
  It's not
"How to gently make love to your lady wife",
it's
50 Shades of Grey
-- and if you haven't been paying attention, this little trilogy of mommy porn books isn't filled with tender moments and hand-holding . . . it's filled with raw, poorly-written, highly unlikely emotionally charged Bondage & Discipline and Sado-masochistic sex between a dark and handsome billionaire (of course) and his sweetly submissive -- I mean, pathologically submissive -- beautiful college student chew toy. 

The "tender moments" usually involve neckties and spanking.  There is a lot of really raunchy, poorly-written sex.  Believe me, I write erotica, and the sales of this book are not based on its literary merit.

But this thing is selling like batteries at a convent
–
so
the idea that your woman wants gentle, mutually-pleasurable, overly-consensual sex all the time is
crap
.  If current marketing trends are any indication (and when are they not?) then there is a deep, often-hidden vein of submission within the soul of the American woman that is screaming to get out. 

There is a part of her that wants to feel
owned, possessed, commanded
-- and if you
aren't
the commander, someone else eventually will be.  Pay attention to what she
does
, not what she
says
, and you'll start tuning into just how much she wants you to -- occasionally
–
just throw her on the bed and rip her clothes off. 

Heck, get some neckties from Goodwill and go all-out. 
I don’t judge.

The point is
, she's fucking bored with the way you're doing it
, and if she doesn't get interested soon, there's no telling
what might happen.

Of course there's a lot more to it than that.  If light bondage and a few extra grunts were enough to fix the problem, then it would be easy.  But it's
not
. 

What you need to do is TAKE CONTROL of your life, and your relationship, before you find it
out
of control.  You can't do that with a few casual tricks.  It takes dedication, willpower, courage and devotion to the idea that you
–
yes, you, Dude!
–
are a masculine prize worthy of contention, a champion striding the earth, the Captain of your own destiny . . . and she is with you because of
that,
not because of how sharp the lawn looks this week.

So wake up, Dude.  Someone is trying to tell you something.  You're doing it wrong, and now is the time to correct your course, before you steer into the iceberg. 

You need to seriously look at your relationship and decide whether or not you are an "equal partner" in all things, or if you are
the Man
who takes charge, gets things done, and appeals to his woman on the basis of his masculinity, not his income potential. 

Don't be the dude who finds himself listening to his wife tell him
"You know, this just isn't working out.  I'm just not happy"
a few years down the road.

Oh, sure, that would
never
happen to you and your devoted woman . . .
but I could list a hundred guys off the top of my head who thought the same thing, and ended up single because of it.

There are resources out there to help you -- a collection of blogs and discussion groups known as the
Manosphere
, filled with your fellow dudes trying to work this shit out just like you are.  There are
tons
of places where you can learn how to manage your woman and your relationship in a way that will benefit you both in the long run.  You can learn how to handle her emotional outbursts, interpret what she's saying, and learn how to appeal to her sexually without resorting to expensive gifts or whining. 

You should, of course, take much of what you find in the Manosphere with a grain of salt, because all of these dudes have slightly different issues than you do, so their solutions might work for them but not for you.  But on the other hand, there are lots of dudes who have
tons
of insight on how the female mind works.  Really works, that is, not how they want us to think it works.  That's one of the points of the Manosphere,
to help you learn how to deal with the woman in your life without considering the benefits of the monastic life
. 

We're here to
help.

But even if you
don't
want to jump into the deep end of the Manosphere yet
, you need to realize that someone thought you were doing it wrong, and needed a "word to the wise".  So consider it given.
 
You might not get another.
 

Believe it or not, this isn't a slam -- there are plenty of dudes in your boat.  And there's still hope, and room to fix it. 
Just don't ignore it.

I'm glad we could have this little talk, Dude.  I hope you took it how it was intended. We need to watch each other's backs, after all . . . because it's not like our wom
e
n will do that for us.
  So enjoy the book.

And d
on't forget to flush.
  She
hates
that.

Ian Ironwood,

A FELLOW DUDE

Your Alpha Presentation:

It’s About Sex . . . And
That’s Okay!

Iwrote this book from blog posts all focused on the idea of a man injecting more Alpha into his life.  And when you’re done reading it, you might think

"Hey, Ian!  All these Alpha Moves are great, but what if you aren't a 'true' Alpha?  Isn't this just wasting time pretending to be what your not?  I thought that's what Game was trying to get away from?"

The truth is, Game is not about becoming an Alpha, or at least not a Bull Alpha, with a harem and spinning plates and that other family in
Reno
.  Alphas are complicated, driven, often dysfunctional individuals who, while successfully playing out their mating strategies, are often destined to a long, lonely life in the wreckage of their own poor decisions.

Why
would you want to be an Alpha?  For the poon, right?  I mean, you're
reading this because you
wanna get laid (bless your heart!)
, right?
  And
Alphas get laid.
  Therefore we should all
be
Alphas, right?

Not
right.

A
common criticism of Game (both Single and Married varieties)
is
that a man who is "forced" to alter himself in order to attract a mate is somehow "degrading" himself by not presenting "the real me" for women to see . . . and
reject.
  Because that's what happens, the heart of the Feminist Beta Fallacy
: "Women Like A Nice Guy, So Being A Nice Guy Will Get You Laid!"
 

In truth, being a Nice Guy
doesn't
get you laid, at least not consistently.  Not even with your own wife. Not if she's a normal woman.

But that doesn't mean you have to transform yourself into a Primal Alpha, living on whiskey and raw squirrel meat while you track down terrorists in
Afghanistan
and screwing six girls a week when you're on leave.  You don't have to be a corporate CEO or internet billionaire or sports star or celebrity dickhead.

T
he world can't exist on Alphas alone.  They make great leaders, great organizers, great guys to have around in a crisis because their high stature often means that they are expendable for the good of the group.  The male lion defends the pride against danger while the lionesses escape with the cubs . . . but if he gets taken out, there will be another Alpha Cat along any time.

The world can't exists on just Betas, either, or Gammas, Deltas, or any of the other Greek letters.  The goal of Game is NOT to turn yourself into a Bull Alpha
–
it's just one of the possible outcomes, for some latent Alphas who just need a nudge. 

For most of the rest, it's where we turn when the best efforts of our "real selves" keep swinging and missing every time we're at bat.
Game is the secret we've been
missing, the magic we were never taught in our youth for fear of offending the Matriarchy:

The goal of Game is to affect an Alpha presentation in order to elicit the powerful sexual response in women that Alpha's enjoy, and take advantage of it.

"Affect an Alpha presentation" means, yes, not being the poor dumb schlub that you want women to love you for. 

It means making yourself into the kind of men that women naturally love -- you're still you, just a "you" who knows the nuts and bolts of getting laid and staying laid. 

It's like learning a martial art.  Knowing Kung Fu doesn't make you a Kung Fu master, it makes you a dude who knows Kung Fu.  It doesn't mean giving up your identity, it means taking responsibility for your identity and taking steps to improve areas in which you are inadequate or in need of development.

And for most guys (and this might come as a surprise to some of you ladies) the metric they use to determine whether or not they are in need of personal improvement is
how much pussy they're getting
.  Or not getting.

That's why Game is not a betrayal of your
inner
self.  Learning Game doesn't mean you're abandoning the noble ideals and dreams and essential sense of self you've had all of your life.  It does not mean ditching your own moral code because you want to (gasp!) have a lot of sex.  It doesn't mean that you have to ignore your passion for ice dancing or your commitment to finding the perfect cup of coffee or the fact you cry at romantic comedies when no one else is around or any other legitimate emotional expression.