The Other C-Word (34 page)

“You girls eat these slowly. They’re full of sugar and butter and all that bad stuff you’re not used to,” Dillon warned.

We all reached for a cupcake. I relished the decadence of it. It was completely quiet until Rick broke the silence. “Dish… I think your mom’s a tough cookie and if anyone can survive this, she can.”

I squeezed his hand because he was an amazing man and I was a lucky girl. The doorbell rang, interrupting my thoughts. Kate smiled weakly, holding a casserole pan. She regarded all of us quizzically. We took up every seat and all the floor space in the living room.

“I know your family is close, but this looks like a commune.”

We all laughed because it was true.

“I made you a casserole, but it has eggs and cheese. I’m not sure how to make anything vegan.”

“That’s okay,” I told her, taking the heavy casserole pan from her. “None of us are vegan. Thanks, Kate.”

She brushed Adam’s hair in a motherly gesture. Rick offered her his spot on the couch, but she refused, and opted to sit on the floor instead.

“Dish… Do you remember when mom started that greeting card business?” Stevie chimed in.

Billie and I groaned because we totally remembered it.

“I’ve been thinking about it. She made us all help her with the designs. It was during the time I was deciding my major and I loved art, but told her I couldn’t make a career out of it. Mom made all us all do our own designs. You guys really sucked, but mine actually sold. Mom stopped doing it right after that, but I think she did it to encourage me that I could make a living at it. It’s very cool how she did that without ever using words. That’s what made me major in graphic art.”

I smiled at Stevie’s epiphany because it made complete sense now. My mom had never been interested in art herself, except as an admirer.

Billie spoke next. “Dish… When I got into Columbia I told Mom I wasn’t going. It wasn’t just because I wanted to stay here, but because I didn’t think we could afford it. For weeks after that, I found my acceptance letter to
Columbia
all over the place. She had made like a hundred copies in different coloured paper. I found the letter under my bed, in my drawer, taped to my windowsill, under my rug. I felt like I was Harry Potter being invited to Hogwarts!”

We all laughed again.

Dillon cleared his throat when the laughter finally died down. “Dish…I never told you all this, but your mom came with me on my first date.” We all stared at him in disbelief. “I know it sounds weird, but it wasn’t. I was crazy nervous and she didn’t actually come on the date, but she sat at the next booth to comfort me and let me know how I was doing. She was kind of like my version of Cyrano De Bergerac.”

The stories kept flowing from there. Kate told us about the misadventures her and my mom had had. She was my mom’s best friend and had so many stories of her own.

I cleared my throat. “I know it doesn’t seem like a grand gesture like your stories, but I will always remember how mom sings to me when I’m sick or sad or have a…nightmare. She still does.”

Kate smiled knowingly and she walked to the stereo and flipped through the CDs until she found the one. My mom’s favourite song and sung by my namesake.
Three Little Birds
by Bob Marley. It seemed to fill the whole room with calm and it was the perfect thing. My mom sung the song to all three of us girls whenever we needed a lift. We all chatted and talked through the night, exchanging more stories about the wonderful woman that was my mother.

I felt strong arms lifting me off the couch. I thought I was floating. “Shhh, I’m just putting you to bed, baby.”

Rick was carrying me. He knew I couldn’t fall asleep on the couch. It would be awful because I was liable to hurt one of them. He knew that because he knew me. He placed me on my bed, kissed my head and slid in next to me, pulling me against his chest. I swore I heard him singing
Three Little Birds
as I drifted off to sleep. He had a beautiful voice and it felt like a dream…one I wanted to remember.

* * * *

The next few weeks moved slowly. We spent most of our time at the hospital. Rick was with me every moment. He never pressed me for answers to all the unspoken questions between us. He just supported me during the day and night.

I finally broached the subject on the third night, when we were alone, in bed. “Rick is there somewhere you need to be? I don’t want you to feel that you have to stay here.”

Rick ran his fingertips down my cheek and across my lips. “No, Marley, this is where I want to be. I have to know though, is there somewhere else you want me to be?”

“No, I want you here. Actually, that’s not the right word. I need you here. I’m so sorry.”

“Shhh, it’s okay, sweetheart. You were right in a sense. I wasn’t trying to fix you, but I was trying to fix your problems. It was only because I love you and you were in pain. Even though I’ve only known you for four months, I felt so empty without you. I don’t ever want to be without you again.”

“Rick, what did you mean when you said you were conflicted to Adam?”

He smiled softly. “I meant that my heart was in one place, but I was in another.” He took my hand and held it against his heart. “My heart was always with you. Although you failed the other abduction, you did manage to kidnap my heart the moment I saw you at the airport, Garter Belt Girl.”

He enveloped me in his strong arms. I felt both our heartbeats and it was like the most beautiful love song in the world. I fell asleep that way. I knew I had a night terror that night because he had a bloody nose the next day. I looked at him with shock, but he just smirked at me and said “love hurts.” That’s when I told him how much I loved him and I never wanted to be without him again, either.

My mother came out of the coma. She was still weak, but we saw progress in her condition on a daily basis. We knew she would kick it when she insisted we four girls have a dish session right there in the hospital as soon as she could eat solid foods. We all shared Zesty bars. It turned out they’re vegan! I dished the most that night. I told them I was happy and in love, and they could all stop worrying about me.

The doctor came in and reported my mother’s prognosis was good. We all shed tears of relief. My mom shook her head at all of us. “You think getting hit by a car is going to put me out of commission? I toured with the Dead, you know!”

* * * *

Rick moved in with us. I know, it sounds crazy to have your boyfriend move in with you and your mother, but hey, I never said we were a traditional family. We were all still worried about my mother’s needs and making sure someone was there for her between our schedules. It turned out that person ended up being Rick. He took care of my mother. They actually bonded and had secret jokes of their own.

In return, she took care of him, too. He became another son to her. I think their relationship helped him as much as he helped her. He missed his mother so much, and in a way, my mother filled some of that void.

Rick was able to keep up his work schedule eventually, but he found ways to telecommute and make day trips, so we could be together most nights. I told him he didn’t have to, but he insisted he couldn’t sleep at all if I wasn’t next to him.

After my mother was able to be on her own, we travelled. It turned out Rick had found some doctors doing innovative work on my infliction. Unfortunately, they didn’t accept insurance. Rick paid for my treatment and the places we stayed. We had to stay in secluded spots in case I had a terror, so it was very expensive. I vehemently opposed the idea, but he insisted, saying it would benefit both of us. We tried several clinics until we met Dr Sheena Sharma. She believed in the combined healing power of eastern and western medications. A recipe of meditation, yoga, foods and new medication turned out to be powerful healers. I’m not saying I never had another night terror—I did—but they became more manageable and less dangerous.

When you rotate through life, you’re really just spinning in circles. I learnt that my past didn’t have to dictate my present. Rick appreciated my brand of crazy, but I had to accept it first. Everyone is a little crazy and, it’s important to share the crazy, along with the good. I’m not saying to announce it everywhere you go or anything. They’ll probably put you in an institution if you do that, but don’t be afraid to let others in, otherwise you’ll never set yourself free.

Epilogue

We all sat around, the normal cast of characters, enjoying Sunday supper. It had been six months since the accident. Billie was home from Columbia for the weekend and my mother was now able to go back to work. We had so much to celebrate. We were all in good spirits enjoying German Chocolate cake, my favourite dessert.

Dillon started, “Dish…I’ve given my two weeks’ notice and have decided to become a personal organiser. It’s about time this illness worked in my favour!”

We all cheered and congratulated him.

“I’d be happy to show you how to file the necessary forms for self-employment, Dillon,” Rick offered. I squeezed his hand because this is how generous the man I loved is.

“Thanks, Rick, I’ll take you up on that.”

Billie followed Dillon, “Dish…I’ve decided to be a vegan.”

My mother slapped the fork out of her hand. “Don’t eat that, then. I’m not a vegan anymore.”

“What? Why?” Billie said as if she was outraged. I happened to know this girl had a serious doughnut addiction so this Vegan thing would never last.

“Sorry, sweetie, I really missed cheese,” my mom replied, contritely.

Stevie went next. “Dish…we had the ultrasound. We’re having a boy!”

We all hooped, hollered and congratulated them like crazy.

“Have you thought of a name yet?” my mom asked.

Stevie winked at her. “We thought we’d keep up your tradition and go with Robert.”

“For Bob Marley?” I asked her, touched she was using my namesake.

“No, for Robert Plant, silly,” Stevie replied. We all voiced our approval at her name selection.

Rick went next. “Dish…I asked Marley if she would do me the honour of becoming my wife.”

Everyone became silent and stared at me. A tear trickled down my mother’s face. She wasn’t surprised though, because Rick had done the right thing and had asked her permission first. Of course, she’d given it to him. The woman probably loved him more than me at this point.

I cleared my throat. “Dish…I said yes.”

Everyone rushed over to me. I showed off the ring that I’d hidden in my pocket. It was his mother’s ring.

If you’ve ever wondered what it felt like to be hugged by half a dozen people at once, it was amazing. It made me feel the best C-word of them all…cherished.

“Dillon, I thought you’d be the next to get married,” Billie said when we’d all settled down.

“Why?” Dillon asked her.

“You caught the bouquet.”

Dillon grinned widely. “No, I actually picked it off the floor after Marley side-stepped it. Either way though, she has it so it only makes sense she’s getting married.”

I look at him confused. “Huh? What does that mean?”

He ran his fingers through his perfectly groomed curls. “Those sachets I brought over when we cleaned your room. I made them from Stevie’s bouquet, so it was always meant to be this way.”

The sentiment of Dillon’s actions touched me deeply. Dillon and I shared a special smile and I knew why he was my best friend. More than that, he was family.

“We should go gown shopping tomorrow, Marley. You cannot procrastinate on this.” Stevie announced.

I shot her an annoyed glance. “I have plenty of time. I’m not worried about it.”

Stevie gave Rick a pleading look. “Rick, help me out here.”

Rick shook his head, holding his hands up. “This is totally Marley’s call. I know she’ll look beautiful no matter what she wears.”

“Yeah, well if you are fine with your bride wearing combat boots and a toga down the aisle then I’ll leave it alone.”

Rick turned to me with his nervous smile. “Baby, your sister makes a good point.”

I stood up and glared at Stevie. She mimicked my movements. We bent over the dining table towards each other with our fists clenched.

“Sometimes I think you’re not a girl,” she wailed at me.

“Sometimes I think you’re too much of a girl,” I wailed back.

We were joking of course, like we always did. I glanced around the table and I knew what everyone was thinking. Rick wanted to pull me into his lap. Adam was trying to come up with a smartass comment to make. Dillon was contemplating why the forks didn’t all match. Billie was readying to stand up and add her two cents. My mother was the one who was going to break us up.

This was my family and I knew them like the back of my hand.

In the end, Van Morrison surprised all of us by jumping on the table, and nibbling my cake.

“Damn, Stevie, your pussy’s eating my German Chocolate cake.”

Rick encircled my waist and pulled me down to his lap. “That’s my job.”

I think the groans and moans and complaining that followed could be heard throughout the whole neighbourhood.

“What! I’m saying it because Marley and I always share desserts. What were you perverts thinking?”

Yep, I love that man
.

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