The Shore (14 page)

“He started to chase me, but I ran into the corn field and hid. I could just barely see him, but he never found me.”

Ryan stood silent for a moment and Cody didn’t say anything or move. He suspected she wasn’t done.

“When he gave up looking for me, he turned to get into his car. Standing in the open door, he shouted, ‘I always dreamt of fucking your sister. I thought you’d be a nice consolation prize. Guess I was wrong.’ He took off then, leaving me in the middle of nowhere.

“I walked home that night. It must have been about five miles or so. By the time I got home, Paige was asleep in her room and my parents were asleep in theirs. No one realized I wasn’t home yet. No one had any idea.”

How much shit had this poor girl gone through, and how many more men were going to fuck her up?

Cody gently wiped the tears from her face.

Ryan came back to him then and there was a hardness in her eyes. “I am
not
my sister, Cody. I am not some fucking consolation prize for Paige.”

She didn’t give him a chance to respond and pushed herself away from him. She walked to the kitchen, grabbed her purse and keys, and made a bee-line for the front door.

“Ryan, wait!” He met her at the door. “Where are you going?”

She looked him in the eye. “I can’t do this, Cody.”

She opened the door and walked to her car.

Cody followed her. “Wait Ryan. Let’s talk about this.” He put his hand gently on her arm.

She looked down at his hand with such a look of disdain, Cody immediately pulled his hand back.

“I can’t,” she said.

Cody sighed loudly as Ryan got into her car, started it and drove away. He just stood there and watched her go. He wasn’t sure what to say or do or how to make this better. There was no comparison between Ryan and Paige. Sure, he’d had a crush on Paige, but what happened with her was years ago. He wanted Ryan. He could see himself with Ryan. And he had let her leave.

Cody went back into the house, grabbed his phone and called her. When she wouldn't answer he called her again. Finally, he started sending her texts as he walked toward his truck and got in.

Cody: 
I’m sorry. I just wanted to tell you the truth. I didn’t want there to be any secrets between us.

Cody: 
Call me. Let me know you’re okay.

Cody dialed Mac’s number hoping Ryan had called her. Maybe she would know where to find her.

“Hey Cody,” Mac answered.

“Hey. Have you heard from Ryan tonight?” he asked and Mac could sense the panic in his voice.

“No, why? What happened?”

Cody sighed. “We had a fight and she ran out. She was crying and upset and I don’t know where she went.”

“She hasn’t called here. What happened?”

“I told her about losing my virginity to Paige.”

“Her sister?”

“Yeh.” Cody answered. “She got really upset. I think I really fucked up, Mac.”

“It’ll be alright, Cody. Maybe she just needs time to cool down.”

“I don’t know. She told me about some things from her past that were just … it’s unreal what this girl has gone through. I just need to know she’s okay.”

“I’ll give Abby a call and see if she called her, okay? I’ll let you know if we hear anything.”

“Thanks, Mac.”

Cody hung up the phone and laid his head back. He couldn’t just sit there. He had to find her. He drove to her place, but when he got there, only a single light was on in the kitchen and her car wasn’t in the driveway. Knowing she wasn’t there, he knocked on the door anyway. Berkley barked and Ryan never answered the door.

Cody: 
I’m at your place. Please answer the door.

Again, nothing. He got back in his truck and waited for a few minutes. He decided to drive up the main road to see if maybe she had climbed one of the dunes to sit on the beach. He drove to Bonner Bridge, but didn’t see her, then drove about 10 miles back down the island and didn’t find her anywhere. Deciding she’d have to come home eventually, Cody drove back to her house and waited in the driveway.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Ryan’s tears wouldn’t stop from falling and she struggled to see the road in front her.

“Fuck!” she yelled as she pounded her steering wheel. Her mind kept flashing between visions of the night in the corn field and look of pity in Cody’s eyes.

She needed to talk to Madison. She would know what to do. Ryan pulled to the side of the road and dialed her number. When there was no answer she left a message. “Mad, it’s me. Give me a call okay? It’s important.”

Shit.

It wasn’t like she could talk to anyone here. Abby was too close to Mac and Riley, and Mac was like a sister to Cody. She would always take his side.

Ryan sat for a few minutes waiting impatiently for Madison to call her back. Nothing.

Hoping a text would reach her faster, she tried that route.

Ryan: 
Mad, I need to talk to you. Call me ASAP.

Still nothing. “Fuck!” she yelled as she pounded the steering wheel again. This time she hurt her hand and it made her cry even harder.

“Where the hell are you, Madison?” she said out loud to no one.

She couldn’t stay on the side of the road forever, so she wiped her eyes and began to drive. It wasn’t until she was in the driveway that she realized where she was.

Ryan looked at her phone each time it dinged hoping it was a text from Madison. She refused to read the messages from Cody. She got out of the car and walked to the door. Not sure what she was doing, but knowing she needed someone, she knocked.

A moment later, the light above her turned on and she saw a shirtless Jaxon walking toward her.

Jaxon smiled at the unexpected surprise. But the closer he got to her, the more he could see she had been crying. He opened the door.

“Ryan? What’s wrong?”

Ryan flung herself into his arms. She just wanted someone to hold her. Someone to tell her it would be okay.

“Ryan?” He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tight. She cried harder.

“Come on, let’s get you inside.” He shifted himself so he still had an arm around her, her face buried in his chest, and walked them down the hallway to the stairs. He lowered his arm and gently took her hand in his and led her up the stairs to the couch in the living room.

“Hold on one sec, okay? I’m going to get you some water.”

Ryan nodded in response but said nothing.

When Jaxon returned, he saw Ryan had found the tissues and was wiping her face. It looked like she had stopped crying. He sat down next to her.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “What happened?”

Ryan couldn’t look at him. He was being sweet – the guy she used to know, but she shouldn’t be here. “I’m sorry, Jaxon. I shouldn’t have come here.”

Jaxon looked at her with a confused look. “Why? Ryan, I’m here for you. You can always come to me.”

She looked up at him and he gave her a small smile to reinforce his statement.

“Are you hurt?” he asked.

She shook her head no.

“What happened?

Ryan looked down at her hands again and sighed. “I just had a fight with the guy I’m seeing … was seeing … and had nowhere else to go. I tried to get ahold of Madison, but she’s not answering.”

Jaxon didn’t know who Madison was, but at this point, it didn’t seem to matter. “What were you fighting about?”

She really didn’t want to tell Jaxon, but she had just shown up on his doorstep. It wasn’t like she was in a position to
not
tell him what happened.

“He told me he lost his virginity to my sister.”

“To Paige?” he asked in surprise.

“Yeh.”

“Wow.” He considered that for a minute. He wasn’t sure why this was such a big deal now. Surely the guy didn’t lose his virginity last week. “But Ryan, I’m sure this didn’t happen yesterday…” he trailed off.

Ryan looked at him. She scowled as she thought about the guy she fell in love with and the guy who cheated on her – now she felt like she was talking to the cheater.

“It’s didn’t. It happened years ago.”

“Okay. I’m sure it would suck knowing the person I liked had slept with my brother, but is that it?”

She looked up at him and just shook her head. ‘No.”

Jaxon nodded. “Then what is it?”

Ryan was quiet for a moment.

What the hell? I’ve already told Cody tonight. What’s another person?

So she told Jaxon the same story she told Cody.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Why didn’t you ever tell me about this?” Jaxon asked when Ryan finished the story. He couldn’t believe in all the time they’d been together, she never told him about this guy.

Ryan shook her head, feeling the tears form again.

“I’m sorry, Ryan. That guy was a dick.”

Jaxon turned so he was sitting with his feet on the floor and pulled Ryan into his side. He draped his arm around her and she cried quietly while he held her.

A few minutes later, he noticed her breathing had evened out and her sniffling had stopped. He looked down and saw she had fallen asleep. Her phone continued to ding, but when Jaxon reached for it and saw the messages were from some person named Cody, he powered it off.

He hadn’t realized how much he missed Ryan until he saw her on the beach the other day. It had been more than four years since they’d last talked. Hell, they didn’t even talk the last time he saw her. He couldn’t blame her for being mad about what happened with Kaley, what he did was a really shitty thing. But now, with her in his arms, something felt so right. So comfortable.

When Ryan woke, it was with a start. It took her a few seconds to recognize where she was and who she was with. When she looked up at Jaxon, he looked down at her and smiled.

“How you doing?” he asked.

“Okay, I think.” She wiped her face with her hands. “A little embarrassed.”

“Why? Don’t be embarrassed Ryan. I’m glad you felt like you could come to me.”

Ryan found his words somewhat ironic but let it go. They had already hashed out that conversation and there was no use bringing it all up again.

“What time is it?” she asked.

“A little before 1.”

Ryan uncurled herself from Jaxon’s arms, stood and stretched. “I should probably go.”

“You don’t have to go. Stay. It’s late, and I think it started to rain.”

Ryan looked at him.

“What?” he asked.

“Nothing, Jaxon. I just don’t think it’s a good idea, that’s all.”

“Why not?”

Ryan looked at him. He still wasn’t wearing a shirt and all she could see was his well-defined chest and sexy blue eyes.

Jaxon knew that look. If there was ever a chance of trying to get her back, it seemed like this was it.

He rose from the couch, stood so he faced her and took her hands in his. “Afraid I’ll want to kiss you?” He was beginning to feel like it was more than a want. He needed to.

Ryan laughed. “No.”

He leaned a little closer gently tightening his hold on her hands. “Afraid you’ll want to kiss me?”

She pulled her hands from his and pushed against his chest. “Definitely not.” She shouldn’t have touched his chest.

“What if I wanted to kiss you?” he asked quietly, moving back to her while his eyes went from her eyes to her lips.

She looked at him incredulously. He couldn’t be serious. “Jaxon…” she said, as his hand began to rise to her face.

“Ryan…” he leaned closer and licked his bottom lip.

Looking into her eyes one last time, he leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her lips. “God I’ve missed these lips.” He leaned down and sucked her bottom lip earning him a quiet moan.

She looked into his eyes when he pulled back. This was the Jaxon she had fallen in love with. The eyes she had spent hours looking into. The arms that had held her at night.

She wrapped her arm around his neck and pulled him into another kiss. It felt so right. So familiar.

Jaxon pulled her closer to him. His lips parted and he ran his tongue along the seam of her lips. Ryan’s lips opened, and he met his tongue with hers.

Continuing the kiss, he walked backwards eventually falling onto the couch. He pulled her onto his lap, her knees on either side of his hips. He could feel her hard nipples on his bare chest. He loved the feel of her body against him again.

The kiss continued to grow, their tongues playing with each other’s, Jaxon biting her lower lip, Ryan sucking on his tongue. He moaned into her mouth when she did that.

Jaxon’s hands slid down and cupped her ass. She could feel his hard cock against her.

Ryan tightened her hold of him around his neck, pressing her breasts against his bare chest. He growled slightly as his hands moved forward on her body. They easily found her breasts and she could feel his thumbs rub lightly over her hard nipples.

She ran her fingers through his hair as her hips began to move in circles against his groin.

His hands slid down her thighs to the bottom of her dress. His fingers worked beneath the fabric and touched her skin. His hands felt big on her legs, and she could feel his thumbs caressing the inside of her thighs as they inched their way toward her center.

Ryan lifted her chin giving Jaxon access to lick and suck up and down her neck.

Having a moment of clarity, she realized what she was doing and who she was doing it with. She felt Jaxon’s fingers reach her panties and slide under the fabric.

I was walking down the hallway with my arms full of groceries. Things had been tense between Jaxon and me, and I thought making dinner and a quiet night in might help the situation. As I got closer to the door, I heard moaning and grunting. Someone was having fun. But as I reached the door, I realized the sounds were coming from Jaxon’s apartment. And some of those sounds were coming from Jaxon.

I set the groceries down and dug out my key. I was afraid to go in, afraid of what I knew I was going to see, but I had to see it for myself.

As I opened the door, I saw Kaley’s long blonde hair bouncing up and down her back as she rode Jaxon on his couch. The same couch Jaxon and I had sex on just days before. Her hands were on his shoulders and his hands were on her hips, guiding her. His head was tilted back and his eyes closed.

I saw one of Jaxon’s hands move to Kaley’s center. He must have started rubbing her clit because a few seconds later, she erupted in an orgasm. Jaxon followed shortly thereafter.

As he started to come down off his high, Jaxon brought his head forward and opened his eyes. It only took a moment, then, for him to see I was standing in the doorway. He didn’t say a thing, not one single word to me. Kaley looked down at him and followed his eyes to me. She just grinned.

Ryan stiffened, remembering Kaley and Jaxon in the exact same position when she found them. She removed her hands from Jaxon’s hair and reached down to grabs his wrists. “Stop, Jaxon. Stop.”

Jaxon stopped, but he wasn’t sure why. “Why? What’s wrong?”

Ryan quickly lifted herself off his lap and walked to the other side of the room. “Are you kidding? We can’t do this!”

Jaxon sighed. “Why not, Ryan? We were made for each other. I think tonight is evidence of that.”

Ryan laughed. “OH MY GOD, Jaxon. This is so wrong!”

“Why Ryan? Why is this so wrong?” He wanted this to happen.

It was obvious she wanted it to happen, too, otherwise why would she be here?

“You CHEATED on me. What would make you think I would ever take you back?”

He stood from the couch and began walking toward her. “Well, you came here tonight. You came to me when you needed someone, a shoulder to cry on. I think that says something.”

Ryan couldn’t believe this. How could her life get anymore messed up? She spent the first part of her evening kissing and flirting with Cody and now here she was, making out with Jaxon. The thought made her sick to her stomach.

“I couldn’t turn to the people I wanted to. You were the only person left. You were a last resort, Jaxon.” She was brutally honest, but at this point, there was nothing else she could be.

Jaxon felt like she’d just slapped him in the face.

“I’m sorry, Jaxon. That was harsh, but it’s the truth. I know we talked things out today and I’m really glad we did, but there is no way I could ever be with you again. You hurt me that much. Someday I’ll forgive you, but what you did – that’s not something I could ever forget.”

Jaxon said nothing.

“I should go,” Ryan said quietly.

She reached down and grabbed her purse and keys once again and walked toward the stairs but stopped. She turned and walked back to Jaxon, placing a small kiss on his cheek. “Thank you for being here for me tonight. And thank you for the closure you gave me today. I wish you well, Jaxon. I hope you find your happiness.”

And then she left.