The Unexpected Life of Carnegie Lane (28 page)

“I hate this.”

“What?”

“Just feeling like this. Like something is missing, except it’s not, because I know what it is.”

“Baby, just listen to me. Go to London. Do what you have to do. I will be in London at the end of the month. I got my new schedule last night. I’ll be there too. We will catch up then.”

Carnegie couldn’t explain the relief when she heard that. Even though she was excited and even a little daunted at the fact her book was coming out, she wished more than anything Nate might be there.

“I’ll call you later... I need to get this organized. I’ll try to leave by the twelfth, I’m just so pleased you called.” She sighed a little, he heard it and it made him smile.

“I couldn’t wait any longer to talk to you. Two more concerts and I’m off to Melbourne. Then back to Europe. This is your turn Carnegie, it’s your turn to shine. I’m so proud of you.”

“Thanks… I’ll see you soon.”

“I’ll call you again. I’ll call you tonight. OK?”

“Yep, OK…bye.” She put the phone down, suddenly happy. It was still almost a cruel separation, but now, it was bearable. She picked up her phone and made another call. One she never thought she would.

“Hello?” The voice on the end said.

“Hi, it’s me.”

“Carnegie, Hi…I wasn’t expecting…” she cut him off. It wasn’t a social call, and even though she needed something from him, the last thing she needed was polite small talk.

“I need your help. I need you to come to Bundaberg and stay with the kids.”

There was silence for a moment. He was wondering where she was going.

“Because?” He questioned.

“I need to go to London.” She didn’t offer any more information.

“Chasing that singer I presume?”

“Now how did I know you were going to say that?”

“Well…are you?”

“I didn’t call you to fight.”

“I only asked a question. Carnegie, why are you being like this?”

“Because I don’t know you anymore and I don’t really want to, but we have four kids and right now, I need you to come stay with them.”

“I can’t just drop everything for you to chase a whim.”

“My book is being released in London on the fourth of September if you must know. My agent wants me there no later than the fourteenth for promotion and pre-interviews. Nate Bowman will still be in Australia when I leave. Are you happy now?”

There it was again, that awkward silence, if she could just find it within her to be a little nicer, this might not have taken as much effort. She didn’t want to make it nice, she wanted to show him it was necessary.

“Well, what are the dates, I need to run it by…”

“You need to be here on the eleventh of August, until at least the fifteenth of September. You don’t run it by anyone. You need to tell them you don’t have a choice. We have internet….work from here if you have to.”

“OK fine, I will come. But Carnegie, I meant what I said the other day… I’m sorry.”

“I meant what I said too. You should be. Call me tomorrow and let me know your flight details, I’ll pick you up.”

“OK, I will. Talk soon.”

She hung up the phone with a sense of indifference, just hearing his voice stirred her up inside. Sometimes she thought that going through the emotions of a separation were like living extreme weather patterns. Sometimes you’re sad, sometimes so angry you could kill them. Sometimes you’re so lost you don’t think you’ll ever survive without them no matter what damage had been done. Sometimes, there was nothing, like a calm before a storm, or the beauty of the sun beginning to shine just after one. No matter how many times you thought those emotions were gone, somewhere, deep inside, they still existed.

In an effort to distract herself, Carnegie went and began selecting music that she could get lost in to help her through the rest of the day. She started with Super tramp, ‘
Even in the Quietest Moments
’ then moved slowly on to Uriah Heap… Just for something totally different.

Somewhere in between, she sent of an email to Kat, telling her to book her flight from Brisbane for the twelfth of August. She looked up the weather in London so she could pack some clothes, deciding to go shopping while she was there for most of it. She began to write down instructions for the twins, and a list of things for their father to do while he was here.

It felt wrong that he was about to be the first man who got to sleep in her new unconsummated bed. Even though she wouldn’t be in it, it still felt wrong... on every level. If she didn’t have Nate right now, she might have attempted to pull off a one night stand with anyone, just so he wouldn’t have that satisfaction. What she didn’t realize, was that her ex and her emotions…were the least of her problems.

On the other side of the world, Richard Toll was preparing his notes. He had all the photos of Nate Bowman and Carnegie Lane he needed, along with enough cruel evidence to start the scandal of the decade. He didn’t care about her fledgling career. He didn’t care if he destroyed her in the process, or made her a superstar. Either way, he would make a lot of money. That was all he cared about.

He began to send out his photos with headlines to magazine editors and newspapers from all corners of the world. As the information hit desks, his email began to light up with requests for more information. He negotiated prices for more photos, and more inside stories, for information confirmations. Slowly but surely, he was weaving a web. One he had carefully spun. By the end of the day, Richard Toll had made over one hundred thousand pounds, as much as Carnegie Lane had made for writing her book. The papers were creating their own version of events, carefully. By tomorrow, he would have made double what he had now. By the time he was finished with her, he would have made a million.

The next day, Carnegie Lane woke early, ready to get her kids up for school. Outside she thought she heard a noise. Walking out the front, a photographer from the local paper called her name and began asking questions. It was only six in the morning…She was hardly awake let alone able to focus on what he was saying.

“Carnegie, can you give us a statement about your association with the dead guitarist in the “
Stickerman
” overdose.”

“What?” she asked, she had to rack her brains to even remember the band. They weren’t exactly her favorite.

“Steven Jacobs, the guitarist who died from the heroin overdose…can you give us a statement about your relationship to him.”

“I didn’t have one. Who are you?”

“Have you seen today’s paper?” He asked, as if happy to enlighten her. He handed her a copy and began photographing her again noting the reaction she had to reading it.

It took a while before it sunk in. Something had gone terribly terribly wrong. She didn’t know this band, not really. She remembered the night this photo was taken, the one that was headlining the Brisbane paper now, yet, she was only out the back sharing a joint with them. She was actually there with another band altogether. ‘
The Stickermen
’ was their support act. It was the headline that horrified her the most.

NATE BOWMAN’S NEW GIRLFRIEND AND HER DRUG FUELED ROCK AND ROLL PAST EXPOSED.

The story went on to say how she had been arrested for drugs, was a known groupie, and was associated with a band who’s lead guitarist had died in suspicious circumstances from a drug overdose. Leaving speculation as to her involvement, since no one was ever found responsible. It went on to say that she was a professional groupie who had worked her way up the musical ranks, landing herself Nate Bowman in the process. It cleverly spoke as if she was part of the Sydney Underbelly in the 80’s using the sensationalism of the TV shows to add fuel to the fire.

She was distracted from reading the rest by more camera flashes as a plethora of photographers turned up. At the same time, her phone was ringing, then her mobile. Carnegie Lane was all alone, and caught in the middle of a media circus. She didn’t know what to do, but she had the sense to go inside and shut the door. She went and picked up the phone.

“Hello” She said, almost panicked.

“Carnegie, its Leonie. Have you seen the papers yet?” She asked, her voice frantic.

“One of them, what’s happening?”

“Richard Toll, he found out all this stuff. We need to make a statement. Got any ideas?”

“For what part? I have just read more bullshit about myself than I’ve ever seen in my life!” She was getting cranky now, not at Leonie, at the crap that was on paper in front of her.

“We warned you about this. Carnegie, just focus…”

“How can I focus when there are one hundred people standing at my front gate with cameras?”

“Oh god.”

“Well, he won’t help…I don’t think” That was almost funny in light of the situation.

“Carnegie, listen to me carefully. You need to make a statement. Say something about this.”

“What do I say.”

“You say you deny all accusations and that any further questions are to go through your publicity manager.”

“Oh my God… Katalie.”

“Yeah…They
have
to call her. Her office is setting up a statement and phone lines to take all the calls. In the mean time…
That
is all you say… They will ask for the number of your publicity manager. Kat has sent you the number to give them through your email. OK?”

There was silence. Carnegie was horrified and frightened and didn’t really know how to react at all.

“Carnegie, talk to me.” Leonie was trying to pull her together.

“Yeah, I’m here. Oh I can’t believe this is happening. Oh no, the kids... what do I do?”

Just then in the background, she could hear Nate, he was yelling and screaming at someone. She had no idea who, all she knew was she never heard him this angry.

“Leonie…Nate who is he talking to?”

“The journalist that started this mess.”

“Oh, this is so wrong.”

“Doesn’t matter, I’m about to get security set up for you at your home. Don’t let the kids go to school, the last thing you want is them being taunted over this.”

“But the girls have exams.”

“Carnegie…you
can’t
send them to school. The media don’t care how much they traumatize them, trust me on this!”

Carnegie was in the lounge room on the phone when she looked up and saw a photographer looking in her window, taking photos of her. She got up and pulled the blind down, then went into the kids rooms and did the same.”

“They are like flies.”

“Just sit tight. I’ll call you soon, I have to get this organized…Hang in there Carnegie.”

The phone went dead, and she was alone. Alone with her name being called from outside the house, vans and TV cameras were arriving. The neighbors were all out on the street. Some of them were being interviewed by the journalists…Carnegie huffed, wondering what they were going to say. She didn’t even know their names.

One by one she tried to explain to the kids what had happened. The older ones were reading the news report, and they just looked at their mother, wondering if it could be true. Journalists have a way to make things sound convincing.

Nate was thinking he was about to have an easy day. Now, he too was in the middle of more cameras than he had seen in a very long time. Leonie was flat out making statements, and also trying to cross reference any fact there might be in the articles that were being circulated. One thing was clear, Carnegie Lane was definitely in that photograph. Not that it showed much, it was circumstantial at best.

All Nate wanted to do was to get Carnegie and the kids out of Bundaberg. She was very much alone up there, and he knew it. He felt responsible for all of this. Guilty that his association with her had caused such grief. He called Katalie, who was in her own right beside herself.

“I hate him Nate….Richard Toll is so cruel.” She was raving at him. Underneath it all she wanted to scream…
I TOLD YOU SO
! But she didn’t.

“It’s not true, so what if she hung around bands. Doesn’t mean she was a junkie.”

“Well, how do you know?”

“Trust me, I know!”

“Nate…As long as you two are together, and for as long as you don’t
deny
you’re together, this is going to continue. My launch is ruined.”