Virtue & Vanity (12 page)

Chapter Fifteen

I had a lot of difficulty falling asleep that night. The melody of the piano still echoed in my mind and I was astonished that Sebastian had been the one playing it. Even though he’d deliberately intimidated me, I couldn’t stop thinking about the fingers that pressed the piano keys. In the morning, I slept in because I was exhausted. Even after I woke up and noticed how late it was I waited before going downstairs to get something to eat, because I didn’t want to meet him after what had happened. I had no such luck, because he was busy reading the newspaper when I entered the dining room. He didn’t even glance at me, let alone greet me when I took my seat. His cold and distant demeanor was completely opposite from the way he’d treated me the night before. Now he was back to ignoring me and I didn’t mind it, because his attention scared me. When Anne came to serve us breakfast, she didn’t miss the surprised look on my face. In the short time I had been living in the mansion, Teresa was always the one who served my meals.

“Good morning, madam,” she greeted me in a strange way.

I didn’t understand why she didn’t call me by my name like she always had. I wanted to correct her, but she shook her head to stop me. I was absolutely confused by her demeanor.

“Where is Teresa?” I asked curiously.

“Teresa doesn’t work for us anymore,” Sebastian informed me without taking his eyes off the newspaper.

“Why?”

He reluctantly put down the newspaper and looked up. His eyes were the strangest icy shade of green.

“I think you know why Isabelle. I thought you’d be pleased,” he said and returned to reading his article.

So Sebastian had heard her after all, and it had obviously meant something to him because he fired her. I remembered the conversation I’d overheard between Norma and Teresa and I felt bad. I thought she deserved some kind of punishment, but letting her go seemed too harsh.

“I don’t want her to get fired because of me.”

“It has nothing to do with you,” he replied harshly.

“But still, I feel bad...” 

“Well, you shouldn’t. Don’t worry about her anymore. There is something else I want to discuss.”

“But isn’t there a way...” 

“Drop it, Isabelle!” He dismissed me but I wasn’t ready to let it go.

“Please give Teresa her job back,” I said in a mild voice, trying to convince him one last time.

He started laughing and I could tell that it was anger, not humor hiding behind his laughter. I had managed to upset him. “You’re not the one pulling strings around here. If I decide to fire somebody, you don’t get to second guess me. And why would you stand up for somebody who treated you that bad in the first place?”

I stared at him for a while and then offered a simple answer to his question. “Because I believe that everyone deserves a second chance.”

Some kind of a strange tension started lurking in the air we shared. I looked up at him and the extent of meaning behind that simple sentence settled in my mind, forming the inevitable question. Had he, of all people, also deserved a second chance? And if he asked me for it would I, no, could I give it to him? It was a silly thought, because I couldn’t have imagined that he would ever ask for my forgiveness or admit that what he had done to me was wrong. But when my eyes met the green storm of his stare, I could have sworn that he was thinking the same. It lasted for only a split second, because he snapped out it quickly, but it was there.

“Teresa will not work here again,” he said firmly and continued before I even got a chance to say something. “That’s the end of it. And you should choose your battles more carefully, unless you want me to turn your life into a living hell.”

Every word he said was emphasized by his threatening voice and I stilled at once. I felt the sting caused by what was his promise—not a threat, because I knew he meant every single word of it. Naively, I used to think my life already had been hell on earth, but suddenly I became aware of the fact that he could do much worse, so much worse to enhance my pain. Only moments ago, I had been starving, but now my appetite was lost and all I wanted to do was get away from him.

I stood up ready to leave when Anne appeared with my food. “I’m sorry Anne, but I’m not hungry anymore.”

“Sit down! We’re not done here.” Sebastian crumpled the newspaper and I jerked from the magnitude of his voice, obeying him instantly. “Put that tray on the table and leave us,” he commanded to Anne.

A few moments of anticipating silence went by as Anne served my breakfast. She looked at me with a glimpse of pity in her eyes and I silently begged her to stay, but I knew she had no choice in the matter.

“I’m really not hungry.” I tried to defend myself when Anne left us alone.

“I don’t care if you’re hungry or not,” he raised his voice. “I told you there is something I want to talk to you about.”

“What... what do you want to talk about?” 

“The terms of our arrangement.” Sudden fear rushed through me when I heard him say that. “You do know what I’m talking about, don’t you?” he asked when he noticed I looked at him in confusion.

I knew what he was talking about, but I had no idea what was written in that document because Mother hadn’t allowed me to read it. Nevertheless, I did sign it, so there was only one possible answer to his question.

“Yes.”

“Good, because given the nature of that contract, you should know that certain things between us are going to change,” he warned me.

“What things?” I asked in a small voice, fearing his answer.

There was only a slight trace of hesitation in his expression, but it was gone almost as soon as it had appeared. ”I want us to start living as a married couple—in the full sense of the word.” 

I was paralyzed. The moment I heard what he said, I wanted to react, but I was simply frozen, fighting the shock that reigned my system. 

“I will be more specific. We will sleep in the same room.” He continued and then paused, watching as the color drained from my face. “As far as the... other things are concerned, I am willing to give you some time to get used to the idea, but you should know that I won’t wait forever.”

A shiver driven by pure terror ran through my body and my throat was squeezed by an unsettling tension that ruled my mind. As I tried to catch my breath, the sudden realization filled with shame washed over me. I couldn’t help but wonder if I had brought this upon myself. 

“Why are you doing this? Is it... is it because of last night? I’m s-sorry. It won’t happen again,” I mumbled my apology.

His hand twitched on the table and I knew he was upset by my question, but he managed to keep his cold expression intact as he answered me in a composed, emotionless voice. 

“Isabelle, don’t test my patience because you know very well why I’m doing this. We both know why you married me and I won’t lie to you and say that I wasn’t disgusted with the things you were willing to accept to secure your position as my wife; but if you thought that you could seal the deal, and then play games, you were very wrong my dear, because I’m not some ignorant redneck hobo from your godforsaken town. I
will
make you abide by the contract you’ve signed.”

My only response was silently gleaming from my eyes, sending a message of humiliation and agony. He exhaled, shaking his head at me. Then he stood up and swiftly left the room. After everything I had heard in the past few minutes, I remained frozen for a while, feeling utterly confused and wondering how I was going to save myself from this fresh hell he had planned
. 
I kept thinking about that contract and suddenly I was obsessed with the need to study its contents. Something was in there, something that made him despise me and hurt me. The only way for me to find out was to read it. I knew that Sebastian’s office was the only place where I could find that document, but I didn’t feel even remotely brave enough to go and ask him about it. I had to come up with a way to get my hands on it, without him ever finding out.

***

As if God himself knew that I needed comfort at that moment of despair, I was greeted by Anne’s warm face when I opened the door to my room. My relief was short-lived because although kindness as well as compassion emanated from her calming blue eyes, her demeanor towards me was still quite official. Something very unusual was going on. It had occurred to me that maybe she was upset because I got Teresa fired, but she had to have known that hadn’t been my intention.

“Anne, please tell me what is happening. Are you angry with me?” I asked fearfully, because she was my only friend in that house and I didn’t want to lose her.

Her face changed in a moment and I could see that she felt for me.

“No, madam. I could never be angry with you.”

“Then why are you acting so strange and calling me madam?” I still didn’t understand.

“Mr. Everett was upset with Teresa yesterday, because she offended you,” she started talking and I felt guilty again.

“I didn’t want her to get fired.”

“I know. You don’t need to feel guilty. It was her own fault. He was so furious that she was lucky firing her was all he did.” Her expression was very serious.

“Is this why your behavior towards me changed? Please don’t treat me any different than before. I will go crazy in this house if I lose your friendship,” I begged her.

“I have to be professional with you, especially in front of Mr. Everett. Those were his strict orders yesterday. We are not allowed to interfere in your private life.”

Bitterness took hold of me as I thought about the extent of that man’s cruelty. The episode with Teresa went perfectly to his advantage, because it enabled him to isolate me from anybody who could help me or protect me from him. But I wasn’t ready to lose Anne. She was the only thing keeping me sane in that house.

“Anne, I understand if you have to be cold and official when Sebastian’s around. But please, don’t let anything change between us when we’re alone. I need you,” I whispered and gave her a desperate, pleading look.

After observing me for a while, she nodded and gave me a hug that was both loving and protective at the same time. I dove into the security of her embrace and held onto her like I would never let go.

“You’re not alone,” she said in a soothing, tender voice.

The immense gratitude I felt towards that woman could not be put into words, but a broken whisper escaped my lips and I uttered the only two words that came to my tired mind. “Thank you.”

She smiled, nodded, and gazed at me compassionately. Then she returned to her chores and I walked towards the window and numbly gaped at the outside world. I thought about everything Sebastian had told me and nothing made sense. I knew I had to get my hands on that contract, but I didn’t know how. A surge of adrenaline rushed through me when I saw Sebastian’s car drive away from the estate. This was my opportunity and I didn’t want to waste it. I turned towards Anne, wondering if she would be willing to give me the key to his office. I remembered she had told me that Sebastian didn’t want anyone going there when he wasn’t home, but maybe I could make her understand and she would help me. She smiled at me again and the moment her honest, glaring blue eyes looked up at me, it was clear that she was loyal to Sebastian and that she wouldn’t betray his wishes. I had to get her to indirectly tell me where I could find that key.

“Anne, I was wondering,” I got her attention and then took a deep breath to weigh my following words, “if you could tell me where I could find keys to the rooms of the house if I need them.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that, dear. I will unlock it for you. And if I’m not available, there is always somebody around. Why do you want to know? Do you want to go somewhere now? I can help you right away,” she said and took a bundle of keys out of her pocket.

I gasped in frustration at the sight of those keys. I had to get my hands on them. “No, I... I mean yes. I thought I could maybe go see a movie in the media room and it’s locked. So, if you could just give me the keys...” I reached for them, but she wouldn’t hand them over to me.

“It’s okay. Come; let’s unlock that door so you can have some fun,” she offered happily.

It turned out that getting those keys would be a lot more difficult than I thought. “No,” I said firmly and then softened my voice. “I don’t want to bother you, you’re busy. Maybe...”

“Oh, don’t be silly. It’s not a problem at all. Let’s go.”

She was already walking towards the door and I had no other choice but to follow her. When she unlocked the door to the cinema room I knew that I was stuck, because asking her for keys wouldn’t make any sense anymore. After she explained how the system works, she helped me choose a movie and I knew she would be walking out with those keys in a few moments, but I didn’t know how to ask her about them without making her suspicious.

“Enjoy your movie, dear. I would like to join you, but unfortunately I have a lot of work to do.” She started walking out and the feeling of genuine frustration streamed through me, but then she stopped and turned around. “There is only one thing.” She frowned.

“Yes?” I tried to sound as calm as possible, but my mind screamed at her to give me the bundle she held in her hands.