BOMAW Vol. 10-12 (135 page)

"Uhm, I went through a period in my life, for a space of time - when things for me, and my children - were - really hard - I mean, really tough. And more than anything in the world, I needed family - to care - enough about - me -..." She gripped her teeth tight, pausing as her face burned from the humiliation of having to say, what she was about to. She swallowed back the saliva building in her mouth and picked up saying, "...- and - my children - to just - be there. To just take us in, so I could try and get our lives, under - control. I just needed, a little time - I just needed, my family, to love me enough - to think me worth it - to - inconvenience themselves - for me; for my babies. And nobody - not one person - in my family stepped forward for me, for them..." She had to stop and wipe the tears from her face. Taking a deep breath, she went on, "... Deidre, I called for help - I prayed for help - and the answer was - you made your bed, you lie in it."

Mundo kept his back to everyone, fighting to stay in the room, nothing cut him deeper than hearing his mother's tears. Nothing he could think of, hurt him like that. He peered out of the window to keep from rushing from the room.

Hearing her like this, being exposed to another bit of their past, gripped Ben even more. He could see why his biological father, was deadly in his protection of them - they'd been hurt enough. And she, Sylvia - felt that Shawn, had been hurt enough. At that point, right then, he wasn't sure who of the two were the strongest and most fierce when it came to protecting one another. But he could feel the power and passion that emanated from her as she poured her soul to save his child, as if she were her own. He would never forget that. And if this what he saw, flowed and flowered just a bit in the soul of her daughter, he wanted her even more today.

Deidre couldn't speak, couldn't bring herself to shift the lump in her throat as Sylvia went on, "Deidre - Angela Rea McPherson - did not make this bed for herself. Why are you forcing her to lie in it?"

"That's not fair Sylvia!" Deidre cried out, tears now in her eyes.

"I know it's not. But you're not the only one fighting for her life. You know, you very well may be saving her from harm brought on by the world, but - if she's unhappy - miserable, trapped in a world with no way out, what value will she hold on her life? And how might she try to escape it? She tried it once. You watch the news like I do Deidre, teenagers, young kids, with everything in the world to live for, and look forward to, are committing suicide left and right, ever wonder why that is?"

Deidre stood staring through blurred vision - she had a good idea why - after all - in her past, her youth, she'd tried it twice. Had almost succeeded once and she was a billionairess.

"Deidre, it all comes down to this - if we don't rethink this now - if you don't step back and take a good look at what you're doing - you're going to end up like me, having to face what you've done to your daughter - because you couldn't see past your own solutions for handling a problem that seems to overwhelm you. Once it's done, whatever it is, it - cannot - be undone - and knowing that - is going to eat - you - alive - if that is, you love your daughter, even a little bit."

Deidre walked to her desk and dropped into the chair, her face hidden in her palms, trying to think, still trying to fight what she knew was true, "She needs me, her mother!" She argued, but she could no longer look Sylvia in her eyes and fight her.

"Deidre, there is no doubt, at some point, she will need you - maybe when she's a bit older. But - right now - at this juncture of her life - in this space and time - she needs her father. She needs me. She needs Mundo. She needs Crystal, Ben, Darren, Isaac, her cousins, her grandparents, her uncles and aunts, her family! We - us and all the McPhersons, that is what she needs right now. No matter how it hurts to bear it, that is the truth. I want you to call her down here Deidre, tell her - we're here, please."

"Sylvia!" She turned, growling her name, with a bit of fight left in her.

"Deidre - do it - call her down here."

"Sylvia she-..."

"Do it - Dee-Dee - do it." Charlie shocked her to say. Deidre turned in disbelief staring at her. Charlie wouldn't look her in the eyes, because her own were pink and struggling. Sylvia had gotten to her, which made Deidre wonder about her story and how much like theirs it might be. She turned from her to look at Jeremiah. He nodded to her, "Yeah, call her down." He felt it too - she could see that he did, that maybe - she was - better off, with them.

Looking towards the floor, Deidre stood and strode from the room.

With every step up the stairs, and taken towards her daughter's room, Deidre felt harsh reality grip her tightly once more. She'd meant every word to Shawn about not endangering the rest of his family for her daughter. And doing what she did to claim her back, had been for all the right reasons - so she felt, even the one that she hid and held to herself, that one being; finally, there was a legitimate reason for claiming her back. While she knew that Shawn would fight for her, she also knew that bringing up the danger to his new wife and her children would take the fight right out of him. What she hadn't expected, was that despite the danger, Sylvia would show up and claim her back. Done in a way that made it hard for her to fight back. Deidre reached her daughter's door feeling heavy of heart, her stomach full of butterflies and opened it to peek in at her. Walking in, she stood by her bed gazing down at her a few moments before waking her. She stood frightened of losing her forever. Frightened of never having the chance to make things right between them. She didn't want to be a distant memory to her own child with no bond or ties for her. Sitting on the bed, she felt weepy and sad. She'd lost Shawn and now, she feared losing her daughter as well. Unable to put it off a moment more, she leaned towards her, her hand lay upon the long thick black silk that was down her back, and on the covers beside her, her fingers gently caressed it, forcing herself to snap out of it, she gently shook her awake.

"Angela, wake up."

She stirred slightly, lifting her head and looking her mothers way after having laid on her stomach facing the wall. "Good morning, time to get up. Someone's here to see you."

Angela immediately turned over sitting up, she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, "Who? My dad here?" She asked, not sure who it could be.

"Uhm, no ... S-Sylvia's here, she-..."

Before she could finish, Angela threw the covers off and was out of the bed in a flash, out of the door, gone from the room leaving nothing but a breeze from her rapid departure. Deidre sat with her mouth partially open, her sentence unfinished, still facing the empty space where she had only seconds been. Closing her mouth, she gently stood wondering how and where her life had gone so horribly wrong.

Downstairs, the others were mostly quiet waiting for Angela to come down. Sylvia needed to move, she was feeling weak in the knees and a bit wobbly, so strolled gently out the door looking towards the stairs when she heard her name squealed out, "SYLVIA!!!" Followed by Angela's running feet down the carpeted stairs and upon seeing Sylvia there, she ran straight at her, breaking her speed only due to Jesse James. Angela's arms went around Sylvia without hesitation, Sylvia grabbed hold of her, hugging and holding on tight. "Oh Sylvia, I thought I would never see you again! You got my email, you came!"

"Email? What email? You emailed me?" Sylvia leaned back to look her in the face and ask.

Angela nodded, then answered, "I emailed you, told you I missed you already and please - not to leave before I could see you again."

"Oh sweety," Sylvia palmed her cheeks, "I never got it because I haven't checked my email since we've been here."

"Oh, then - why did you come?"

"Because - you think I would leave you behind?"

Angela gazed into her eyes, her own turning pink, "You have to leave without me, I don't want anything to happen to my dad, or to you Sylvia." Saying that, she glanced up the stairs where her mother appeared, paused, watching them, coming slowly down as she listened. Angela quickly looked to the floor, unsure of what to do now.

"Angela, look at me?" Sylvia softly ordered.

She obeyed, "Angela, that what you just said, about your father, about me - that is not for you to worry about. My baby, that kind of burden belongs to your father, and I - not you. All I want from you right now, is one simple thing - a promise - will you give me that?"

"Sylvia, I would give you anything, anything."

"Aaah, thank you, because all I want from you, right here, right now, is the truth. The true answer to this question, do you want to stay here? Or - do you want to stay with us, where you have been? You've been with your father and I now long enough, to know."

Angela glanced up at her mother once more, and in her eyes, she tried to say how sorry she was, "Mother - I'm sorry..." She looked to Sylvia, "Please don't leave me here, please don't leave me." She cried throwing herself back into Sylvia's arms. Sylvia held her, "I won't, I won't ... I promised you didn't I?"

Angela nodded.

"Well then, somehow, we will work this out." Sylvia held her and looked up at Deidre, "I cannot - leave here, without her - I'm sorry, I can't."

Deidre Stiffened her spin, she was forced to do that, or else, collapse on the stairs into tears. To see her daughter with a tighter, more natural bond to this woman, than they'd ever had, seeing it with her own eyes was just the thing to bring her to her knees. Not to end up there, she took on a bit of the backbone her mother had always displayed, squaring her shoulders, she strode down the stairs past Sylvia and Angela, back into the small library. They slowly followed, with Angela clinging onto Sylvia as if she feared letting go.

"Well, apparently, my child and my responsibility to her has been taken out of my hands, so Sylvia, please - tell me, what am I supposed to do now, just let her go? Ignore that her life may be in danger there, ignore the danger you may be about to cause your children?!"

Before Sylvia could speak, her son spoke up for her.

"Panic Room." Mundo said suddenly, having waited long enough to speak up.

Everyone in the room turned his way wondering what he meant by that.

"What?" Deidre asked confused.

"Remember the movie with Jodie Foster and her daughter? They lived in a New York townhouse, and some shifty-shadies broke in, Forest Whitaker was one of'em? You remember that movie don't you mama? We all watched it one night not too long ago, remember Angela?"

Angela's eyes grew round remembering right away, nodding vigorously she shook Sylvia's arm, so excited she started trembling, "Remember Sylvia? They had cameras, and they saw someone in the house, and her daughter got into that room that was safe for them, and her mother went in there too?"

Sylvia was not a movie person and often times when they watched, she barely paid attention. But then Angela remembered something she had said when they were watching it, "Remember Sylvia what you said when they were in the room? You said, if my dad could afford it, he'd no doubt have one built into that house he's building?"

She remembered. She looked at Mundo, then at Ben.

Angela turned to her mother, "Do you know the movie?"

Deidre nodded, she remembered it well.

Angela stood shaking as the idea seaming to be the perfect solution took root in her mind, "Mother, please? Daddy is building Sylvia a new house - what if, you put a panic room in it to protect me? It could be big enough to protect everyone."

Deidre stood stunned, and then she took a really good look into her daughter's eyes, with Sylvia's words coming back to her; she exhaled, knowing what she had to do. She looked at Mundo, and then turned and looked at Charlie, "Would that work, a panic room?"

"We're talking about a who-o-o-ole lot of money." She wanted to clarify that fact to her.

"We're talking about my daughter's safety Charlie ... and, her happiness - would that work?"

"Nothing, would work better, than a well designed and engineered panic room! Why do you think the president of the United States has one in the White House."

Deidre nodded, turned back to look at her daughter again, "You may not believe me, but it's true, I love you - I always have. And I want you to be, where you are happy. And if that is with your father, and Sylvia - then mama's gonna have to build you a panic room, huh?"

Angela bounced up and down, on the verge of clapping, "A really good one mother, so that everyone is safe, Sylvia, Mundo, Crystal, her boys, and Ben ... everyone has to be safe, especially my dad! Can you do one like that?" She pleaded with tears in her eyes.

"Are you kidding me? We're gonna put one in that house that will make the president green with envy." Deidre wiped at a tear falling. Her daughter ran into her arms, hugging her tightly, "Thank you thank you thank you! Nothing in the world you could ever buy me, can come close to this!" She passionately declared.

"That ain't no lie!" Charlie sang out, chuckling, "Make her daddy pay for her college education, because this here is going to run deep deep deep into your millions."

Deidre smiled, winking at Charlie, "Here I thought you'd been paying attention, I have billions, not millions. Before the summers over, I will have earned every dime of that back in just interest."

"DAI-YUM!!!" Mundo exclaimed. "Sorry mama, ya'll - but - DAI-YUM!" He repeated shaking his head. "So um, i's okay then when we leave, if we take these muffins with us? Can you have dude wrap'em up?!"

Sylvia shook her head laughing, "You pitiful Mundo!"

Deidre laughed, "They are good aren't they? Be my guest, you're more than welcome to them. However, before you all leave here, I want to pick your brain on how you might set this up, if you were in charge of protecting her, and your family."

"Tell'ha Ben, I was up all night thinking about this!"

Ben smiled, "He has been, he's just been waiting for the right moment to spring it on you. I guarantee you, what he thought up, everyone should be safe, nothing is one hundred percent of course, but this will give us all a peace of mind and the time we need for help to arrive."