Fifty Shades of Ecstasy (15 page)

Both should be moving together to make this lusty thrust the hottest find on the beach.

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nyone can have good sex, but to have insane acrobatic super sex, you need to be in top physical condition. Being in good shape makes everything a little better: exercise can stave off depression, give you more energy, help you eat better, and even give your car a nice new wax (okay, maybe not that last one). But exercise is boring and completely un-fun, at least in my humble opinion. So I’ve come up with some options that don’t suck so much.

Dance

Any kind of dancing will do. Dancing is an incredible thing: It’s art, it’s exercise, and it’s what your body does automatically whenever someone puts on some groovy tunes. If you want to make dancing part of your exercise routine, you can sign up for classes to learn anything from classic ballet to the very un-classic but trendy pole dancing, or even try belly dancing. If that’s not your style there’s sure to be a dance class that moves to your kind of music, so check out your local dance schools.

If you’d rather dance with nobody watching, you can pick up some moves through online videos, or with a dance-themed video game. Or you can turn on some music and groove out on your own: don’t be embarrassed if you’re rocking lame middle school dance moves like the moves aren’t so important as long as you’re bending, shaking, twisting, shouting and getting the blood pumping while you rock and roll.

Do Stuff Naked

Anyone who’s ever gone skinny-dipping knows that being naked makes everything more exciting. Why not bring that to your exercise routine? You might want to keep your naked calisthenics at home, although there are some gyms that welcome naked patrons.

There are some exercises that work better au naturel than do others. Anything with a lot of movement, like running, jumping jacks, or jump rope, can be painful in the nude because it makes your bodacious bits bounce. Not fun or comfortable. Slow moving exercises are great while naked: try doing your stretches, sit-ups, and other core exercises like planks. If you’re into yoga, try your usual routine with a naked twist! Spending time naked gives you a chance to get comfortable with your body, which is a necessary ingredient for really good sex! So strip, then give me 20!

Compete

If you’re having trouble getting motivated, you might need the extra push of a little competition. This works best with a partner, but so do the positions in this book, so you probably have someone in mind.

You can get your competitive activity by picking up a game of an old standby like basketball, or by racing, either on foot or on a bike. If your competitive strengths are more on the digital side, you can still make a winning streak work for you: make new rules for your video game play to give push-up penalties for in-game losses. You can even make a game of it: make different in-game actions “cost” different exercises. Or you can use a deck of cards to pick a random exercise whenever your character dies: just assign each suit an exercise (for example, hearts are sit-ups, spades are push-ups, diamonds are jumping jacks and clubs are planks), then when you draw a card you do that number of that kind of exercise, so for a six of hearts, you would do six sit-ups!

Kid Stuff

Raid your garage for some fun props to make exercise less lame! There are plenty of things to do that will get your heart pumping, but that don’t look like exercise at all! Dig out the Frisbee and set up a one-on-one game, or run around with the soccer ball for a bit. Better yet, pull out your Hula-Hoop and get in shape by gyrating your hips! Grab some chalk and play hopscotch in the driveway, or get the jump rope and show off your doubledutch skills. Find something that makes you want to move, and then stick with it!

Have Hot Sex!

Sex burns calories. Did you know that? Everyone should know: sex isn’t just good, it’s good for you! Having good sex helps you relieve stress, reduce pain, and get closer with your partner, so when you’re getting down and dirty, keep that in mind! Any position can get your blood pumping, but positions that get you moving work even better. The more you’re bumping and grinding, the healthier you’ll be!

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This circus act will turn you topsy-turvy once you master it! It doesn’t look like it should work, but if you tilt your head and turn the book upside down, you can see how everything fits together. Both partners need a lot of strength for this position, so you may need to work up to it!

He rests his elbows on a chair or ottoman, extending his legs straight back into a plank. She lies on a pillow on the floor and aligns her naughty bits with his. She then spreads her legs and lifts them up and back over her head, curling up while pressing her palms flat against the floor.

She’s bent in half and upside down, so thrusting feels a lot different!

But while you’re enjoying your roll in the hay, be conscious of her neck and his lower back, since both are vulnerable in this position.

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He’ll lean your tower of Pisa! This position is like the ultimate trust fall, so don’t let go! It requires a lot of strength for him to support her safely, so he better be eating his Wheaties!

She lies on a pillow on the floor. He stands in front of her, facing her, as he pulls her hips up to rest on his thighs with her legs straight out behind him. He should lean over until he is at the right height to slide into her. She stretches so that her body is held straight and stiff (like the old slumber party game, “light as a feather, stiff as a board,” if she stays rigid, it is a lot easier for him to hold her up!). She can hold on to his calves for more support, as he thrusts down and forward.

This position may tire her out quickly (or give her a neck ache) but it’s so fun while it lasts! Keep strokes slow and deep to make good use of this angled position and enjoy the tight new sensations.

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Show off your moves with this visually stimulating oral position. The challenge is to stay up while he rocks your world!

She plays it old school like 5th period gym class, and poses on the floor in a classic “bridge” position. He kneels between her legs and holds her thighs for more support. See how close to paradise you can get before your bridge comes falling down!

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