I can make you hate (51 page)

E. coli,
1

EastEnders,
1
;

compared to Monster Munch,
1

ebooks,
1
,
2

Ed,
1

Edinburgh TV festival,
1

Editors,
1

Edmonds, Knoll,
1
,
2

education: A-level results,
1
;

money-saving measures,
1
,
2
;

most valuable thing you get,
1
;

tuition fees,
1
;

underperforming students,
1
–
2
;

vocational training,
1

Efron, Zak,
1

Egyptian revolution,
1

Eiffel Tower,
1

Election Night Armistice,
1

Electric Dreams,
1

electrocorticography, no way that’s not a made-up word,
1

Electronic Arts,
1

Ellis, Root,
1

The End of the Affair,
1

endless loop,
see
unbreakable cycle

Endurance,
1

English Defence League (EDL),
1
,
2

Entertainment Weekly,
1

Entourage,
1

environment and climate change,
1

erotic Stephen Glover,
1

ET,
1

Evans, Crust,
1

Evans, Gwen,
1

Monty Everest,
1

Everett, Marcel,
1

The Execution of Gary Glitter,
1

executions, public,
1

Exocet missiles,
1

F1,
1

Facebook,
1
,
2
,
3

Fahkz-Humbaddi, Ivana,
1

‘fair’, definition of,
1

fairy cakes (cupcakes),
1

Falklands War,
1

Fantabulosa!
1

fast-food outlets,
1
,
2

Fat Controller,
1

Father Christmas,
see
Santa Claus

fear, of God,
1

Ferdinand, Rooney,
1

Ferrari, Neck,
1

Ferrell, Wall,
1

Fiat,
1

Fiennes, Sous Chef,
1

Fifi,
see
50 Cent

films, British,
1
,
2

financial news, dismal,
1

Financial Times,
1
,
2
,
3
,
4

Fireball XL,
1

Fish Tank,
good film;

you should see it,
1

FlashForward,
shit show; forget it,
1

Fleiss, Hidey,
1

Flintoff, Friddle,
1

Florida Family Association,
1

food: on Japanese TV,
1
.
See also
snack food

Foot Locker,
1

football,
1

footballers,
1
,
2
.
See also individual names

Four Lions,
1

forwards,
see
backwards

Fox, Lame,
1

Fox News network,
1

Francis, Winnie,
1

Frankie Goes to Hollywood,
1

Franzen, Janatharn,
1

free stuff: backrubs, from internet,
1
;

warm croissants, on buses,
1
.
See also
Twitter

Freedom
(Franzen),
1
,
2

Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday,
1
,
2

Friday Night with Jonathan Ross,
1

Fritzl, Sous Chef,
1

Frizzle, Stephen,
1

Frost, Nicki,
1

Fry, Step Hen,
1

fucking Mac owners (inc. author),
1
,
2

Furtado, Neddy,
1

Gaddafi, Moo Armour,
1
,
2
,
3
,
4

Gaddafi dynasty,
1

Gaddafi Hero,
1

Gaga, Laddy,
1
,
2
,
3
,
4

Galloway, Gorge,
1

Gately, Stephen,
1
2
,
3

gay people: bashing,
1
;

homophobia,
1
;

lesbians,
1
;

in space, get over it,
1

Geordie Shore,
1

Getting On,
1

Ghostbusters,
1

Ghosthunting With Katie, Alex & Friends,
1

Ghostman, Shirley,
1

ghosts, depicted as whinging
cry-babies
,
1
;

obvious non-existence of,
1

Giggs, Crying,
1

Gillette, use of shaving foam as masturbatory aid,
1
;

hang on a moment you’re like a broken bloody record here,
1

Girls Aloud,
1

Gladiators,
1

Glastonbury,
1

Glengarry Glen Ross,
1

Glenister, Flip,
1

Glitter, Garfield,
1

Glitterphile, The,
1

Glover, Step Hen,
1

God, fear of,
1

‘God particle’ (Higgs boson),
1

The Golden Shot,
1

Gollum,
1

Goody, Shade,
1
,
2

Google, used to humiliate Aryan Brotherhood of Texas,
1
;

ongoing attempts to drive author insane,
1
;

reveals naughty Lady Gaga photos on Daily Mail website,
1
;

used by friendly Japanese people to assist hapless tourists,
1

Gourmet Burger Kitchen,
1
,
2

Gower, Dafyd,
1

Grand Theft Auto,
1
,
2
,
3

Grange Hill,
1

Grant, Hoo,
1
,
2
,
3
,
4
,
5

Gray, Auntie,
1

Great Inescapable Time Disaster,
1

Greater Manchester Police,
1

Greece,
1

Green, Damson,
1

Greene, Grey Ham,
1

Griffin, Nurk,
1
,
2
,
3
,
4

Griffiths, Derek,
everyone
likes him,
1

Ground Zero mosque,
1

Guardian,
1
;

Saturday supplement (
The Guide
),
1

Guff Ditch
trilogy, compared with
King Lear,
1

Guildford,
1

Guinness, Allegra,
1

Gulf of Mexico (Deepwater Horizon oil leak),
1
,
2

gymnasiums, using,
1
,
2

hacks, tabloid,
1
.
See also
phone-hacking

Hammond, Flip,
1

Hammond, Rich Hard,
1

Hancock, Neck,
1

Hannah, George,
1

Hardy, Thomasch,
1

Hasselhoff, Doogie,
1

Hatcher, Terry,
1

Hawaii Five,
1

Hayman, Andrews Sisters,
1

Hayward, Tinny,
1

Heat
magazine,
1

Hello, good to see you, it’s great to be here. This is a good store isn’t it? How old are you? That’s a good age. Which football team do you support?,
1

Henry, Linus,
1
,
2

Herbert, Janet,
1

‘Here Come the Girls’ campaign,
1
,
2

heritage, ways to wring cash from,
1

Heroes,
1
,
2

Hershey bars,
1

Hester, Step Hen,
1

Higgs boson,
1

Hilton, Sieve,
1

history,
1

Hitler, Adolf Piers,
1
,
2

Hitman,
violent advertisement for,
1

Hogarty, Steve,
1

Holby City,
1

Hollyoaks,
1
;

babes,
1

Holmes, Hey Man,
1

homeless people, transformed,
1

homophobia,
1

Honey Monster,
1

The Hookening,
1

Hoon, Chef,
1

Hopkins, Do You Mind If I Call You ‘Tony’ Anthony? Sure? Thank You. Tony,
1

housing, money-saving measures,
1

Huggy Bear,
1

‘human centipede’, middle segment of,
1

humanromances,
1

Hummers, stretch,
1

Hunt, Garth,
1

Hunt, Jeremine,
1

Hurt, Chon,
1

Hutchence, Mitchell,
1

Hyland, Ion,
1