If You Only Knew (And Then Came Love Book 1) (31 page)

Chapter Seventeen

October 7
th

              Liza sat with Ava on Sunday morning.

“Where’s Julian?”

“He said something about meeting with your dad this morning. He wanted me to come and he’d meet me here.” Liza rested her hand on her belly.

Ava raised an eyebrow. “My dad’s on his way back from a conference in California. I’m supposed to pick him up at the airport this evening.”

Liza’s heart dropped. He’d lied to her. Where was he? She sent him a text.

When are you going to be here?

She wanted to ask him what he was doing, but she hated when he questioned her. Lying didn’t enter her vocabulary though.

“I’m sure he has a reason.” Ava laid a hand on her arm.

The door burst open and in came Julian, holding a newspaper in the air as if it were a prize. His smile radiated around the room. He grabbed her hand, tugged her to her feet, and spun her around.

She squealed and clasped his biceps. “What has you so excited?”

“Remember that e-mail you sent me, from the day you quit?” He held up the still folded paper.

“I sent you an e-mail the day I quit? Julian, I was in the middle of a panic attack I could have done anything and not remembered.” Liza laughed. She wanted to be mad at him for lying, but his smile was infectious.

He opened the paper and pointed to the headline of the front page.

She looked down at the paper, her eyes widened as she read. “Clinical Director and Director of Case Management Fired Over False Reporting.” She read further on in the article. “Trina Harding and Kate Welch were formally released of service from the Yarrow Center, after discoveries of over reporting case management and visitation services.”

“My friend at the newspaper told me the story was being released today. I wanted to surprise you, so I’m sorry I lied.”

Liza rested her hands against his chest. “I think I’ll forgive you for this little lie. It was well worth it.”

“Isn’t it great?” Julian pointed to the paper. “I’d say Karma gave them a pretty good dose of their own medicine.”

Liza laughed. “I knew they’d been suspended, but wow — firing how did this come about?”

“You knew about the suspensions?” He cocked his head to the side.

“Remember Shana?”

He nodded.

“Anyway, she and I have been talking via text message. She works for the county, they hire out services through the Yarrow Center. She’s been keeping me abreast of the situation, but I hadn’t heard they’d been fired yet.” Liza smiled at him. “And why do I get the feeling you had something to do with that?”

Julian’s lip curled. “I may remember Shana a little better then you think I do.”

Liza frowned.

“Not in that way.” Julian held up his hands in surrender. “Drew and I were in Madison about a month ago and ran into the receptionist Brenda and your friend Shana having lunch together. We stopped to talk to them. Once I found out where Shana worked, I told her about the e-mail you sent me and then Brenda filled us all in on a couple more details. Shana pointed us who to talk to and from there and the investigation began.”

“So no money exchanged hands?” Liza gave him a sideways glance.

“Nope. No bribes, straight, honest investigation.” Julian smiled again. “Didn’t think I had it in me, did you?”

She laughed and leaned forward to kiss his lips. “I’ve always known you did.”

*****

October 13
th

Liza yanked a bottle of water out of the refrigerator. She hated being alone in the apartment all day. She’d spent the day before with Audrey. Jake had returned after five years of being gone on Cora’s birthday. Audrey had been having a rough time ever since he went back to Texas.

Julian worked all day for the last three days. A man on a mission. His sole focus on his work. She’d never seen him like this before.

He came home all three nights smelling like fresh cologne and breath mints. Either he was having an affair or he was drinking again. She suspected the latter.

The doorbell rang.

Liza smiled. Visitors would be great. She opened the door to see Ava standing there.

Ava sniffled and wiped her eyes with a tissue. “Can I come in?”

“What’s wrong?” Liza sank down on the couch. Ava never cried.

“Terra and Ethan are getting married.” Ava sniffled again and plopped down beside her. “My best friend has been dating my brother for the past three months and I knew nothing about it.”

“Married? What? How did that happen?” Liza patted Ava on the back.

“I don’t know. I’m living with Terra and didn’t know they were dating? How did they keep this from me? Hell, why would they? She’s my best friend?” Ava blew her nose on the tissue and then tossed it on the coffee table.

“Eww.” Liza stared at the tissue.

Ava laughed. “That was hilarious.” She threw the tissue away and returned to the couch.

“I don’t get it?” Ava looked down at her hands and ran her fingers over her perfectly manicured hand.

Liza quirked her head. “Maybe for the same reason you’re hiding your relationship with Drew?”

“There is no relationship with Drew. We’re fuck buddies.” Ava shrugged.

Liza gaped. “O—kay.”

“I don’t even know if we’re that anymore. We haven’t seen each other in about a week.” Ava let out a deep breath. “We were doing good and then things changed. I guess the stress of everything has gotten to us.”

“I’m telling you, if you two don’t come clean soon it’s going to lead to problems.”

Ava stood up and adjusted her pants. “Drew’s been teaching me how to cook, I swear I’ve gained ten pounds.”

Liza looked down at her hands. “Do you think . . .” Ava wouldn’t understand.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Liar. I see your wheels turning, what’s up.” Ava waved her finger at Liza.

“Just pondering the same thought that always crosses my mind when one of Julian’s siblings gets engaged.”

“He’ll come around eventually.”

“Sometimes I wish he were more like Drew.” Liza chuckled.

“What?” Ava gave Liza a sideways glance.

“A little less complicated.”

Ava opened her mouth, but that snapped it closed.

The door handle rattled and both ladies turned their heads.

Julian staggered into the apartment. His eyes were glazed.

Liza bit her lip and looked away from him.

Ava stood. “I’ll catch you later, Liza. Thanks for listening.” She sauntered over to Julian and rested a finger on his shoulder. She waved her other hand in front of her nose. “If you’re going to try to cover something up, avoid bathing in cologne. You’re either trying to hide your drinking or you’re hiding an affair.”

“I’d never cheat on her.” Julian stared at Liza.

“You’re not fooling anyone.” Ava patted him on the shoulder, waved to Liza, and out the door she went.

“I wish you’d talk to me.” Liza stood and neared him. She covered her nose with her hand and took a step back. “Okay, I want to hug you, but you need to wash some of that shit off.”

“Liza.” He slurred her name.

“Who drove you?”

“I took a cab.”

“I’m going to bed.”

*****

Liza curled her body as much as her thirty-two week pregnant belly would allow.

Julian climbed in beside her and wrapped his arms around her. He was naked.

“Not going to happen.” She scooted away from him, shoved her hands under her pillow, and closed her eyes. “Despite all your attempts to cover it up, I can still smell the whiskey.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” She let out a deep breath and rolled over to face him. “But you’re shutting me out when you don’t talk to me.”

“Old habits die hard, I guess.” He ran his fingers down her arm. “What did Ava want?”

“Ethan and Terra got engaged today. I guess it hurt her feelings she didn’t know they were dating.”

Julian chuckled. “Her and Drew are doing the same thing.”

“She still claims there’s no relationship there.” Liza thrust herself up so her head was resting on her hand. “Why are you drinking?”

Julian shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“I feel like since I quit my job, you’ve gotten worse. It worries me.” She caught his hand and squeezed. “I don’t want to sound like a nag, but I want you to be healthy and obviously, it’s my fault.”

“It’s not your fault. I’m having problems controlling my thoughts.” Julian rubbed his forehead.

“But why? Have you been taking your pills?” She sat up and fought to find a comfortable position where she could rub his head with both hands.  “Sit up, face me, and lean forward.”

Julian complied. “Not at night. I can’t take them with alcohol.”

“The pills are your priority. With them you’re more in control. Ignoring the pills in favor of the booze is feeding the negative.” Liza massaged his temples and head. “You take the majority of your medication at night. The alcohol may numb your thoughts for a little while, but the medication helps with the long term effects.”

“They don’t help, Liza. The thoughts are still there. The manic and depressive episodes are worse than the medication can handle.” He laid his head against her belly as she massaged his neck. “I wish she’d move for me.” He pushed gently against her belly.

“Maybe if she kicks you in the head it will knock some sense into you.” Liza moved her fingers down his neck to his shoulders. “How can it help when you’re not consistent? If you’re taking the meds and you’re still having problems then we go see Dr. Marcus or we deal with things together.”

Julian let out a heavy breath. “I know you’re right, but damn it, when I’m drinking for a few hours I don’t have to live in my own head.”

“You’ll never be regulated if you don’t give it a try. Stop with the excuses.” Liza stopped her massage.

“Thank you. Turn around.”

“You make that sound easy.” Liza hoisted herself up and rotated her body. “The pill thing isn’t a quick fix, but in the long run, it’s better for you. And what about your special stash you have? I haven’t seen you smoking it in awhile? Isn’t that supposed to help with some of this?”

“It does. I smoke at the lab. I try not to here, I know this is a smoke free building.”

“If you need to smoke, do it. Especially if it helps. I’d rather see you smoking than drinking.”

Julian squeezed her shoulders. “You make it sound easy.”

“I didn’t say it would be easy.” She shrugged his hands off her shoulders. God, he could piss her off in an instant.

“That didn’t come out right.” Julian hauled her into his arms.

She struggled, but her fight didn’t last long. His strength and her belly had her outmatched. “All I want is for you to be happy. You won’t find it in the bottom of a bottle.”

“I know.” He touched her chest above her heart. “This is where I’ll find happiness.”

Liza pushed herself up and placed his hand on his own heart. “You have to find happiness here before you can find happiness with anyone else.”

*****

October 21
st

The alarm rang indicating someone came in the driveway. Julian checked the cameras. Drew. What was he doing here? He checked his phone, but it was off. Fuck it, he’d let himself in. He poured a glass of whiskey – took the shot and washed it down with another.

Leaning against the wall, he closed his eyes. He enjoyed the burn of the whiskey. A little too much.

“Isn’t it a little late for you to be sitting in the lab?”

“Isn’t it a little late for you to be wandering into my house?” Julian opened one eye to peer at his brother standing across the room. Drew stared at the bottle of whiskey.

“How much have you had to drink?” Drew strode over to stand by his brother’s desk.

Julian shrugged. “Enough.” He sat forward and poured another shot.

Drew captured the glass, downed it and had the bottle out of Julian’s hands before he knew what was going on. “And now I’m sure, you’ve had too much to drink. He snatched the bottle and dumped it in the sink. “Are you out of your mind? What the fuck has gotten into you?”

Julian rested his arms on his desk and laid his head down. “Nothing.”

“Bullshit. Liza says you’ve come home drunk every night this week.” Drew slammed a chair down next to the desk.

Julian looked up as Drew sat down.

“I can’t help you if I don’t give me a hint?”

Julian leaned back in his chair again. “I felt the need for a drink.”

“You know what Dad says about feeling the need for a drink.” Drew gave a smile.

“If you feel the need for a drink, it’s the worst time to have one.” Julian laced his fingers at behind his neck. “He’s never been a big drinker.”

“Neither are you, except when you’re scared,” Drew countered. “There’s been times Mom’s hinted Dad’s drinking wasn’t always as controlled.”