Indigo (20 page)

She leans into my hand, and the expanse of her neck falls into my gaze. I stare at it with lazy eyes as I whisper the last, “And I would do just about anything, for you to dance with me.”

Holy shit. Did I really just say all that? I didn’t plan to play all my cards in one go, but the second I got going I couldn’t stop. I can see her chest moving up and down, and for a moment, neither of us move. Shit. Did I fuck everything up?

Her phone vibrates and the sudden intrusion makes both of us jump. She scrambles for her purse, and I drop my hand slowly away from her, taking a step back.

I can tell even in the dark she’s a little flustered, and I hope that’s a good sign. She finally pulls out her phone, and I see whoever is calling is a number she doesn’t have saved.

“They keep calling me,” she says out loud, her tone hoarse. “I have no idea who it is.”

Before I can respond to that, or ask her about what I said, Sabrina and Shawn crowd in behind me. Shawn looks relaxed, so it must have gone well with Sabrina’s brother, and I remind myself to ask him about it later. My mind isn’t really on that right now, though.

I watch Indigo put her phone away, and she immediately gets into conversation with Sabrina, as if our exchange never happened. My words
must
have had an effect on her, but it looks as if--at least right now--I’m not getting anything back in the way of a response. It’s not the worst thing that could happen I guess. It’s in that moment I start to realize I’m probably going to have to take the reins if I want anything to happen here. For some reason--at least right now--that’s okay. I hope it’s okay with her too, because now that I let her know exactly how I feel, I don’t want to stop telling her.

Sabrina leans over the bar, and the man working the counter immediately comes over. Next thing I know, she’s passing around three drinks. Indigo downs hers in quick succession. Yikes. She still hasn’t met my eyes.

Sabrina grabs Shawn’s hand. “C’mon, let’s head toward the stage, they’re about to start.”

Indigo hops off her stool, grabs her drink, and then looks at me for the first time. To my surprise, she reaches out and grabs my hand. I grasp it eagerly, not caring if it’s probably because the crowd makes her nervous. The four of us make our way through the hydrating bodies and find a spot up front. There’s barely enough room to move, but with Indigo’s head nearly pressed again my chest, it doesn’t really bother me.

We see Sabrina’s brother make his way on stage, flask in one hand, guitar in the other. The crowd around us goes nuts, and we all cheer along with them. Danny sees us immediately, winks at Sabrina, and then whispers something to one of his band mates. He doesn’t waste time with any introductions and immediately begins to play. A smooth reggae beat blasts out of the speakers, subduing the crowd and changing the atmosphere into something intimate and heavy.

As if she can’t help it, Indigo starts swaying to the music, her hips swinging perfectly in time with the lazy island beat. She doesn’t let go of my hand, and I use it to pull her closer until there is no room between her body and mine. The warmth sends a hot shot of lust through me and I almost close my eyes at the sensation. She doesn’t resist, just circles in slow motions against me, and brings my arm that’s holding her hand across her chest.

Maybe she did like my big confession after all because the Indigo from a few moments ago is gone, in her place my graceful dancer.

Minutes pass, and I’m hypnotized by her. I wouldn’t even be able to tell you anything about the music or who we were even standing next to. Nothing but her movements and the feeling of her body against mine fill my mind, and my vision. I’m so much taller than her, that I have a perfect view down the front of her body, and I can’t take my eyes away from how the swell of her breasts rise and fall in her dress as she moves the top half of her body in small sexy circles. I lock my arm in place from where it lays right below them so I won’t give in to my instincts and touch her.

I don’t know how many songs have passed, each harmony flows effortlessly into another. When Indigo rests her head against me, I think about all that I said to her before, and for a moment, I feel as if here, on the dance floor, she’s answered me in her own way. If this is how she wants to communicate with me from now on, I’m all fucking for it.

Feeling reinvigorated, I take the reins again. Unlocking my hand from hers, I move both of mine down to her hips and spin her around so she’s facing me. She doesn’t resist, but won’t meet my eyes either, just keeps dancing.

In our position, her legs are almost straddling one of mine, with my left hand over her thigh, and my right on her lower back. I keep waiting for her to look up at me, but her eyes are glued to my chest. I want to get her attention, so I move against her in a way I haven’t yet before, and when she feels my inevitable hardness press into her stomach, she gasps and finally…finally looks up. One part of my brain is telling me no, this is too fast for her, but the rest of me is dying to give in to the chemistry spiraling like a hurricane between us.

Letting her know my intentions, I drop my eyes to her lips. Fuck. I’m so turned on, but she has to come to me for it, I can’t pressure her. I can’t take the reins in this. It’s too big.

But the seconds pass, and after a tense few she spins back around and the moment is lost. I can feel her apology in her movements, as she presses against me a little harder than she did before, and I try to enjoy that while I tamp down my disappointment. From the way she’s moving against my obviously aroused body, I have to assume she’s into me, so it must be that she’s just not ready.

I can live with that. I’ll wait as long as it takes, even though every part of me is literally aching to touch her. I pull back from her insistent movements a little bit so I don’t literally lose my ability to think.

Sabrina and Shawn, who I actually forgot existed, show up next to us with another round of drinks. Indigo takes one greedily and starts sucking it down. I sigh, and back up a little more. I’ve driven the poor girl to the bottle.

Shawn finds it hilarious, and gives his untouched drink to Indigo when she finishes hers. She takes it with a barely audible thank you, and then her and Sabrina start dancing a few feet in front of us.

“She didn’t need another drink,” I tell Shawn, trying to make sure he’s hears me over the music, but also trying to make sure the girls don’t. 

“Relax, she’s having fun,” he replies casually, to my irritation. “Besides, I don’t want mine. I’m trying to keep my wits about me for later tonight with Sabrina if you want what I mean.”

I do. No need to ask him to clarify. Sabrina and Indigo are wrapped up in dancing with each other, so Shawn and I head off to the side where we can still keep an eye on the girls, but give them their space at the same time. A few songs later, I can tell the drinks are catching up the Indigo when she starts to wobble on her feet, although I take the time to admire the fact that she’s still on beat.

When I see her nearly fall backwards into the speaker, I move in.

“Whoa, whoa. Are you okay?” I put my hand on her shoulder at the same time she regains her balance.

Her eyes light up when she sees me, as if it hasn’t been only fifteen minutes. Out of nowhere, she launches herself into my arms, and I rush to catch her. Wrapping her legs around my waist, and her arms around my neck, she puts her face close in next to my ear.

“I think I might be drunk,” she mumbles.

Her breath on my neck sends heat down my body. “Oh yeah?”

I feel her nod against me. Then a second later, “I’m sorry.”

I want to ask her for what, but I can tell she’s now laying her face down against my shoulder. I wrap my hands tight around her, and then search for Sabrina.

“We’re going to get some air,” I mouth when she looks at me.

Sabrina’s forehead creases and she moves up beside us. “Wait…Is she okay?”

I can tell Sabrina’s worried, so I turn Indigo around so she can look at her face and see for herself. I hear the two of them whispering, and Sabrina seems placated.

“We’ll meet you outside in about 15 minutes. We’ll wait until this set is over, then say goodbye to my brother quickly,” Sabrina tells me.

I nod to show that I heard, and then head towards the door with Indigo still nestled in my arms. It feels so good to hold her like this, and I almost dread the moment that I’m going to have to put her down. It reminds me of the time I carried her home from the bar.

There are a few people smoking cigarettes outside, and I push through them and head towards the parking lot. I don’t see anywhere we can sit down, so I head towards my car. Keeping one arm wrapped around her, I reach into my pocket to grab my keys and pop open the trunk. I don’t want to let her go, so when I sit down, I keep her on my lap straddling me. Her head pops up right away, as if she wasn’t just slumped over in my arms.

Hoping she won’t move from the intimate position we’re in, I lighten it by taking my hands away from her waist, and leaning back against them. But she doesn’t say a word about the position, and I wonder if she’s too drunk to really care.

“I’m sorry,” she tells me again, dragging my thoughts away from watching her balanced on my lap. She’s in a dress, and I’m trying really hard to not let my eyes wander where they are desperate to go.

I hold her gaze. “Why are you sorry? You don’t have anything to be sorry for.” She can’t be talking about not kissing me, can she? She squirms a little, and I close my eyes and will myself to keep cool. If she moves up just an inch, she’ll bump into my raging hard on. Never have I wanted something to happen and not to happen with the exact same intensity. 

Biting her lip, her hands shoot out to hold onto my shoulders. “Can I tell you something? Something I’ve never told anyone?”

My heart kicks up, absolutely elated. “You can tell me anything.” She looks unsure, and I know she would never be volunteering any information unless she was drunk. And although my impatient nature almost gets the best of me, I try to do the right thing. “Indigo, why don’t we wait for another time, you should probably be sober--“

Her fingers dig into me and her big blue eyes look deep into mine. “I’ve never been kissed before.”

Trying to do the right thing is overrated. I hide my reaction well, thankful that I’m not drunk. I’m shocked, because she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, but deep down I had a feeling she was totally inexperienced. I put my hands up to where hers are still locked on my shoulder, and squeeze. “We don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for.”

But I can tell her thoughts are no longer on me, her troubled eyes betraying her. “He wasn’t allowed to kiss me.”

I squeeze her hands harder and ask her who, even though I think I know.

“Richard. My kidnapper. He did…other things. But he never kissed me. It was the one thing Joan wouldn’t allow.”

Thank god. “Indigo,” I start to say, but she continues.

“It was her one rule, and for some reason, he followed it. But that was the only one. There were no other rules. He took everything else.”

The sheer honesty of her confession stuns me. Disgust and rage swarm in my stomach, and my fists clench over hers. I wonder briefly if I’m squeezing too tight but at the moment, I can’t care. I can’t focus on anything but Richard’s face from the Wikipedia article I read, and my teeth grind together so hard I can almost hear them.

Her eyes are filled with tears, and she’s not blinking. She’s fingering her scar, which to me is just a part of her, like her skin and the color of hair. We both just breathe for a few seconds before she says, “I’m so thankful for that, every day. That he didn’t take that away from me, too.”

I want to tell her so much, but all I manage is, “I’m thankful too.” Now is not the time to ask her any questions, as she has already given me so much. “But Indigo, about the rest? I’m so sorry. I wish I could go back and time and make it so you didn’t have to go through any of that, and give you back all the things he’s taken away.”

A few tears spill out of her eyes and she wipes them quickly away, as if she doesn’t want to be crying. And that’s the last thing I want to see her doing. Fuck I feel so shitty. Thinking of her inebriated state, I really hope she doesn’t regret telling me what she does in the morning.