Midnight Squad: The Grim (24 page)

           
There was no denying I was a murderer. My decisions
killed him, and almost two hundred other people counting the rest of the
orphans, the other innocent bystanders in the building, the other residents
that died in the surrounding buildings from the fire, and another five first
responding firemen that burned to death trying to rescue the orphans. Since
then I was spending my spare time looking into all my unintended victims in all
my previous missions. I found
myself
 
keeping
a list. With each day, the
list got longer. It was looking less like a list and more like a book. As the
names kept coming so did the nightmares. Janine caught glimpses into my mind
every time she entered my body. I would have tried to avoid our time together,
but the only time I could find any peace was when she was inside me, and I
could know all her thoughts. I was just like those people that burned her at
the stake. No that’s not correct, I was actually worse because at least most of
them thought they were doing the right thing. I just hid behind duty as an
excuse. Here I am surrounded by supernatural creatures that can do amazingly
horrible things, but the only real monster looks me in the eyes every morning
when I shave.

           
Penny was a vampire, but when she killed it was for food.
Danika might be able to eat a man alive, but she was just responding to her
instinct. A wolf eats its prey, so why wouldn’t a werewolf eat an enemy
combatant. Katy could cast some wicked spells, but to my knowledge she always
tried to show restraint. Janine was practically a saint. Even Alhambra, for all
her horrible psychotic behavior, was just behaving according to her instincts.
She was just doing what any other member of her kind would do. Face it, the
only real monster here was me.

           
It wasn’t long before Janine knew everything I had done,
but she didn’t judge me. In fact, she was actually worried about me, and afraid
that I’d give up on everything. One day she cornered me in my room and said,
“Grim, I don’t mean to pry, but I’ve seen what you’re going through. You’re a
good man that’s done many horrible things, but don’t let your past define your
future. You are a better man than you give yourself credit for. I’m not happy
with all you’ve done, but neither of us can change the past. We can only try to
improve for the future. Don’t drown under the weight of your previous failures.
Use those failures as guideposts in your future decisions. If you want to talk
about it I’m here for you, but otherwise that’s all I have to say.” I kept
expecting her to break into a huge lecture, or scream at me, but strangely
enough that was really all she ever said, and it was comforting just knowing I
could discuss it with her without any pressure. It still didn’t make the
nightmares go away.

           
Finally, the monthly trip to town came. DD and I hooked
up the trailer and took the long drive into town. When we arrived, DD was going
to go to the beauty salon, and then do her shopping. Apparently because I was
new everyone decided it was my job to do all the shopping.
Sort
of a slight hazing ritual.
I wasn’t happy about it, but considering some
of the things I’d made newbies do when they joined my previous squads I really
couldn’t complain about doing the shopping. When we finally pulled into town my
ass was numb, and my legs were asleep. I stumbled out of the vehicle like an
old man. DD gave me the list, and then left. I knew something was up when she
practically skipped away, and then cringed as I read the list.

           
Clearly, I was the butt of everyone’s joke. I mean sure
everyone made the most obvious choice to start out with tampons. As a brother
to a whole flock of sisters, I was accustomed to grabbing tampons at the store,
and wouldn’t have thought anything about it if not for the fact that they all
wanted several different types each. Unless these girls had somehow contracted
the ebola virus in their cooters, I had to assume they were just fucking with
me. High, super, maxi-super-enriched flow, and whatever weird combinations or
names that they could find filled a disturbingly large portion of my shopping
list.

Then
there was the other crazy stuff. Janine put hemorrhoid medication on her list.
Penny asked for an over the counter jock itch treatment. I’m not sure Alhambra
understood the premise of hazing. Her list was just a drawing of me hanging
myself surrounded by stick figures jerking off on me. On the plus side the
stick figures were all wearing smiley faces so I took that as a step up in our
relationship. Almost all of them had something in their list to mess with me,
but Katy clearly put the most thought into it. Her list started with snug fit
condoms, which they apparently make for people with small dicks. She asked for
bridal magazines, fashion magazines, yeast infection medication, two dozen
rolls of toilet paper. No, not two dozen rolls in a package, but each
individually packaged roll of toilet paper. She even made sure that they all
were different brands. She also requested two packages of extra-large women’s
panties, and the largest training bra I had ever seen in my life. They looked
like they would fit…me…crap! She topped it all off by having me buy two packs
of Depends undergarments, a lubricant specifically designed for anal sex, and a
game of twister. The cashier was barely able to ring me up over her nervous
laughter. It was clear that she thought I was planning some type of really
bizarre transvestite orgy. With all the things I can buy in this place, why oh
why can’t I pick up some dignity.

           
At least I was able to pick up some clothing while I was
there. I wasn’t complaining about what they provided me. It was all nice, and
if I were honest then I’d have to admit it was much more fashionable than what
I would have chosen for myself. I really was more of a t-shirt and jeans guy. I
left the store and made the walk of shame back to where I parked. Even the
greeter glared at me like I was some sick pervert. I sighed in relief as I
started loading up the trailer, and after I had everything in place I gave DD a
call. “So where are you?” I asked.

           
“If you look across the street you’ll see a strip mall.
I’m in the clothing store next to the pizza place.” I hung up and drove across
to the other parking lot. After leaving my trailer full of embarrassment in the
parking lot, I walked in and started looking around. I caught a glimpse of her
hair down an aisle and made my way in her general direction. I was about to
step around the corner when I heard two saleswomen talking down to DD. “Ma’am,
are you sure you want to buy that, it’s really not built for a woman of your
body type.” The other woman snickered, “if you want I could show you something
more your size. Perhaps a muumuu or maybe you’d like something for pregnant
women. They have those nifty stretchy elastic that works wonderfully for
someone your size.” The two women were like two cats circling a wounded mouse.

           
DD looked embarrassed and ready to cry. I felt anger boiling
up from behind my eyes. Before I knew what I was doing, I swaggered towards the
three women. The sales clerks turned towards me. I could tell both women were
interested in me by the way they stuck out their tits and tried their best to
hide the imaginary five pounds every woman thinks they need to lose. I’m not a
pretty boy like Brad Pitt, but I was pretty damn sure most women wouldn’t mind
waking up with my arm draped around them in the morning. I was what you’d call
the rugged alpha male type. The kind of man a woman tells her boyfriend she’d
never be interested in, but then when he’s not looking she slips him her
number. So I was pretty sure how this game was about to play out. The first
woman swayed towards me and stuck out her hand, “Well hello Sweetie. Is there
something I can do for you?” I stepped past her as if she wasn’t even there.
The second woman tried to get my attention, and got nothing for her troubles.
For the record, attractive women know how hot they are, and if you blow off an
attractive woman that’s more than a little conceited then they just lose their
shit. I’m not saying they scream and yell, but they just seem to go a little
off in the head. You know that expression a dog gets when it doesn’t understand
what is going on, but something is clearly wrong. That’s the same one both of
these women had as I ignored them. I kept getting closer to DD, and she hadn’t
even looked up to see me. She was so embarrassed that I was worried she’d run
out before my evil plan of shutting those two bitches up could really start
working.

           
“There’s my Snuggiekins
!“
DD
looked up in shock just in time for me to sweep her into my arms. I swung her
around and planted a big, passionate kiss on her lips. When I finished she
looked like she could barely stand. “Oh come on baby. Why do you want to waste
time in here? There’s nothing here but skinny bitches with no tits and cheap
clothes. Come on, there has to be a better store than this. Somewhere that lets
us really show off what a treasure of a woman I’m about to marry. How about you
let me take you to dinner, and then we’ll go to some place nice with good
clothes? That store at the other side of this mall looked like it had real nice
clothes. This place looks like the type of crap that only skinny skanks with no
curves buy. Oh, no offense girls, I didn’t see you there. I’m sure your
boyfriends think you’re perfectly ok looking.”

           
“I’m single.” They both said in unison. I swear you
couldn’t ask for a better opportunity to run up the scoreboard. I played up
every ounce of sarcasm, “Really, you two are single…I would never have guessed.
Come on DD. Let’s get out of here.” To DD’s credit, she caught on quick. She
waved at the saleswomen, “By-eeeeeeeeeeee!” I think it’s the first time I ever
heard a bye last almost ten seconds. The two saleswomen followed us to the
door. The look of shock plastered on their faces. We were just about to step
out of the door when I felt a sharp pop on my ass, “Oh Grimmy! You just wait
until I get you home.” She gave my butt cheek a good hard squeeze. I played
along and wrapped my arm around her. I whispered just loud enough for our two
followers to hear, “No! You wait until I get you home. I’m gonna ride you like
I stole you, and then feed you those little chocolate strawberries if we still
have any from last night. Then, if you’d like I’ll rub your feet.” Yeah, I was
laying it on thick, but they’d upset my friend. So the bitches gotta pay!

           
We stepped outside and I turned towards the other store.
“Where are you going?” She asked. “Well I figured we should go to that store,
that way they can watch us some more. It’s a great way to rub their little
rotten noses in it.” DD froze, “I can’t shop there.” DD’s shoulders sagged a
little when she realized I was waiting for an explanation. “I can’t afford it.”
Her head hung in shame.

           
“Why not, I mean if you’re making anything near what I’m
making then you can’t be hurting for money?” I asked. DD took a deep breath,
and after looking around for a few moments she whispered sheepishly, “I have
other expenses so I can‘t afford expensive clothes like that. Please don’t ask
me anymore about it.” I took a moment to consider the woman standing in front
of me. She was young, smart, and more than a little self-conscious. On top of
that, she was one of the warmest, most welcoming people I’d ever met. She was
so desperate for friendship she’d do just about anything, and she was so
worried about being rejected that she practically tripped over herself trying
to win a person over. It was dangerous to let her keep her secrets, especially
considering I was still trying to determine how dangerous things might be.
However, DD had gone out of her way to help make me a part of the group. I had
serious doubts that I’d have as good a working relationship with the other women
without her help. That alone had to earn her some leeway.

           
“Ok your secret, whatever it is, is safe with me. Just
don’t make me regret it okay?” I grumbled. DD threw her arms around me, “Oh
thank you! I really owe you big time!” She then pulled away and asked
nervously, “Grim, can we please just not mention this to anyone else back at
the compound?” Strangely, her request made me feel better. If she didn’t want
the others to know then there was a good chance it was a personal secret, and
not part of some bigger conspiracy. I nodded and felt the air squeezed out of
me one more time as DD showed her thanks. Who knew the woman could be so
deceptively strong?

           
She started to walk to the trailer when I caught her arm.
DD’s green eyes looked up at me in confusion as I pointed her toward the store,
“You may have expenses, but I don’t. Besides, I promised you a shopping spree.
Just leave me enough to pay my dad the bail money I owe him, and a little left
over in case of emergency.” DD’s jaw fell open in shock. “Really, you mean it?”
Her words had that perfect mixture of hope and excitement that only comes when
you get something you really want. It reminded me of how each of my sisters
sounded when Dad let them wear makeup in public for the first time.

           
“Yeah, come on. It’ll be fun. Consider it my way of
saying thanks for all your help.” DD launched herself at me once more, and
crushed me with the mother-of-all-hugs. We moved to the store. I couldn’t get
the smirk off my face as DD practically skipped her way into the store. When
the double doors closed behind us, I looked at her. She was just standing there
like a kid in a candy store. DD just didn’t know where to start, and so she
just kept bouncing in place while her adorably cherubic face darted in all
directions while she tried to decide where to go first.