Reverie (Hollow Hearts Book 1) (14 page)

Elias slipped into the barn. “How was the trip, brother?”

“Just fine. No troubles. I picked up that rub for Silver’s leg like you asked. It’s over there on the bench.”

“Thanks. We were a bit surprised you didn’t come back last night.”

“Well, it was nice to have a little break in town. Mother saw Doc Winters while we were there. Says she’s doing well. Thinks things will be back to normal by spring if she continues to take it easy.”

“That’s good. It’ll be nice to have Hetty’s help for a while longer, but I expect she’ll want to move on before too long.”

Isaac paused. “What makes you say that?”

“Well, Joshua for one.” Elias moved and gave Isaac’s horse a pat. “It’ll be hard to court over the winter, but come spring I’d think the two of them would want to move things along.”

“Who says they’re courting?” Isaac asked angrily.

“Isn’t it obvious, brother? It’s been a while since I’ve done any sort of courting but I know the signs of an infatuated man.” Elias laughed.

“She doesn’t even know him!” Isaac shouted.

“Calm down, brother. I’m just sharing my opinion here,” Elias said. “And frankly they do know each other. Not very well, but Joshua worked with Calhoun’s horses quite often.”

Isaac grunted.
An acquaintance? It didn’t look very acquaintance-like the other night
. He felt his anger rise again. Just thinking about Elias and Hetty on the porch…

“There is a pretty simple solution to all this,” Elias said.

“And what would that be?”

“You could marry Hetty.” Elias looked his brother right in the eyes.

“What are you talking about?” Isaac pretended to be confused, but clearly his brother had picked up on something.

“Do you remember nearly snapping my head off when you thought I was looking to court her? Do you remember how angry you got when you thought we’d done something on the porch that night? And do you not remember how you felt when she walked off with Joshua after church on Sunday? Call me crazy, brother, but I think you have some serious feelings about this girl.”

“Doesn’t matter. She’s not interested,” Isaac mumbled.

“And why is that? I’ve seen the way she looks at you. That’s not the way an employee looks at someone who is supposed to be her boss.”

Isaac took a deep breath and told Elias about their conversation on the porch. He told him what he’d said to Hetty after Joshua had dropped her off the other night, apologizing for his behavior and asking for her forgiveness. He told him how jealous he’d been seeing the two together and how he kissed her. He couldn’t control the need to do it. And he told him how Hetty rejected him.

“She doesn’t want me to think she’s taking advantage of our family,” Isaac said. “I guess she’s afraid that we’ll think she’s just here because she has no family, no home. No family of your own, so latch on to someone else’s. I would never think that of her, though.”

“Can’t really blame her, can you? I mean, after what you said to her that night.”

“No, I can’t blame her. But I apologized. I tried to make things right. Tried to tell her in some way how I feel. In spite of my apology she’s starting a courtship with that boy!”

“All due respect, brother, Joshua is hardly a boy. And he’s a nice man.”

“I know. I know that. But there are other reasons. It just isn’t a good idea for me to expect anything from Hetty.” Isaac thought about Rachel. His mother told him he needed to make things right. Should he tell Elias now? No, he wasn’t ready. He couldn’t risk tearing apart his family. What would he ever have to offer Hetty then?

“Whatever your reasons, you better figure out how to get over them. Or you’re going to find yourself alone and the girl you care about married to someone else,” Elias said before turning to walk away.

Hetty snuggled down in her bed and pulled out her letters. With the house finally quiet she could enjoy her cup of tea and catch up on a bit of correspondence. She opened the letter from Mrs. Calhoun first.

My Dearest Hetty,

I made it safely to Philadelphia. Though I detest travel the trip was not nearly as bad as I expected. I’m happy to say it was wise to travel before the weather turned. It is cold and rainy here most days, which makes getting out and about a chore. Sol, however, keeps me in good company. He sends his love.

I’m sorry to report that my sister passed on shortly after we arrived. I did have a few days to spend with her, though she was much more ill than even I expected. I am blessed that I was at her side when she died. She was not alone and that is a comfort in this difficult time. Her funeral was quite the affair. So many of my old friends and acquaintances attended and shared many wonderful memories of my sister. I’ve reconnected with many friends of my youth. Of course they are now all as old as I am, but we’ve enjoyed recounting the days of our childhoods.

I will be staying in Philadelphia for the foreseeable future, as I must tend to my sister’s affairs. Her home is to be sold and the contents donated accordingly. She left most of her fortune to different charities and I feel it is my duty to attend their events in her honor. I hope you will consider joining me and resuming our relationship come Spring. I will certainly arrange all necessary travel and accommodations should you choose to accept my offer. I do miss your company.

I trust that you are well and your work on the Wheeler ranch isn’t leaving you exhausted. I hope you are finding time for your own pursuits between caring for the cows and chickens. Please give Elizabeth my deepest affections.

I look forward to your reply and I wish you a nice holiday season.

Sincerely,

Mrs. Alma Calhoun

Hetty smiled. Poor Mrs. Calhoun—she knew nothing of ranch life, imagining Hetty in charge of chickens and cows. Dirty work, she’d call it. The truth was that Hetty hadn’t been near the chickens or cows since arriving. Isaac and Elias took care of those chores for her. It troubled Hetty to hear that Mrs. Calhoun’s sister had passed away. She didn’t like the thought of her being in Philadelphia all alone. Hetty knew how the woman liked her routine, her quirks about how things were done. Being in a home that wasn’t hers with a staff she hadn’t trained must have been difficult. But it brought Hetty some comfort to know that Sol was with her. He knew her particulars and would do anything he could to make her as comfortable as possible during her time in Philadelphia.

Hetty didn’t know how to feel about the job offer. She knew her position on the Wheeler farm was just temporary until Elizabeth could resume her usual duties. With the rest and new medicine, she seemed to be on the mend. Perhaps by spring her services wouldn’t be needed on the ranch anymore. They’d have a small crew returning to the bunkhouse, and that would give Elias all the help he’d need. Isaac would resume his furniture business. That would just leave Elizabeth to care for Lottie and the house. The family would probably welcome the possibility of things returning to normal. And it wouldn’t hurt for Hetty to have some sort of plan in place for when her job was complete. Maybe she should consider joining Mrs. Calhoun in Philadelphia. It would be a wonderful adventure to see the city, the movement of people, and experience all of the aspects offered by the local culture. Knowing Mrs. Calhoun, Hetty was sure that she was already taking the city by storm—her presence well known among the city’s elite.

But leaving her small town? Hetty had spent her life here. Sure, she’d spent most of it in the orphanage, but this was home. She had friends here. Only a few, but they were important to her. She’d come to love Lottie and would hate to miss seeing her grow. Even when she left her job at the ranch she’d still see the family weekly at church and imagined her friendship with Elizabeth would hold firm. She knew folks in town did their best to take care of their own. In Philadelphia she’d be a stranger, a face in a crowd, as much a nobody as somebody could be.

Hetty put the letter back in its envelope, determined to make no immediate decisions. This would take time and prayer. Nothing needed to be decided now. In fact, Hetty promised herself she wouldn’t make a decision until Spring. Yet she felt comfort in knowing she at least had an option.

She sipped her tea and reached for the second letter. She noticed immediately that Joshua must not write many letters. His penmanship wasn’t the best, though she didn’t expect most men did much letter writing. Usually that was left to the wife, the lady of the house. Yet he’d made an effort, and she appreciated that.

Dear Hetty,

I had such a nice time during our afternoon together. Thank you for the wonderful company. You must be finding it odd that I am writing you when I just saw you the other day, but I wanted to make a couple things clear. I hope you realize that I have every intention of spending more time with you if you so choose. I can’t remember the last time I had as much fun as I did with you. I also wanted to invite you to dinner with my parents. I would love for them to meet you.

Considering your family situation I do not have the option to ask your father for permission to court his daughter. But I do believe in making my intentions known. I am asking you for permission to continue our relationship in a more formal manner. Would you allow me the honor of courting you, Hetty? I know this isn’t how things are traditionally done, but I believe it is important to be open with you. I see a future with you, one filled with laughter and children and a warm home. I believe I can make you happy and I’d love the chance to show you how wonderful we can be together.

I will call on you soon and I pray you will accept my offer.

Joshua

Hetty stared at the dark walls of her room. In the course of reading two letters, Hetty felt her world turn upside down. She didn’t like being faced with so many decisions—important decisions—especially when she felt so unsure about all of them. Joshua was offering her the start of everything she dreamed of. A home. A family of her own. He was taking her greatest desires and handing them to her wrapped in a shiny red bow. She’d be able to stay in Hollow near her friends and everything she’d ever known. She’d be able to become a productive member of the community and not just an orphan working for a wealthy woman. They’d have a house in town where she’d plant a garden, sew curtains, and spend the evenings with a good, Christian man. Children would be a given and quickly, too, she imagined. It sounded perfect. Yet her heart felt heavy. Did she care for Joshua in that way? Could she picture all those wonderful things happening with him by her side? Could she cross the boundaries of physical intimacy with someone who, up until moments ago, had only offered friendship? As she thought about all the possibilities, one person wouldn’t escape her mind.
Isaac.

Why did he kiss me?
she thought.
He’d said it was jealousy of Joshua.
Hetty wished she knew Isaac’s intentions. Had he just given in to a moment of weakness? Was it more akin to him not wanting her but not wanting someone else to have her either? Was he struggling to admit to himself the same feelings she was? Hetty needed answers. And the only way to get them was to confront Isaac. Truth be told, she couldn’t see herself settling down with someone she didn’t love, no matter how kind and wonderful he was. Could she grow to love Joshua in that way? More importantly, could she admit that, above all else, it was Isaac who had her heart?

The snow continued to cover the ranch in a blanket of white for several days after Elizabeth and Isaac’s trip to town. Hetty watched from the kitchen window. How quiet and peaceful it all seemed. As much as she wanted to bundle up Lottie and head outside to play, she didn’t want to interrupt the perfect canvas nature created. No footprints, no mud—simply a picture of immaculate whiteness, undisturbed and a wonderful view for her day of baking.

Isaac and Elias had tended to the ranch chores early this morning and were now taking advantage of a day with very little to do. They’d been entertaining Lottie with games and stories all morning, and Hetty enjoyed listening to the warm laughter coming from the front of the house. Elizabeth busied herself with some sort of secret gift in her room. Coming out only to refill her tea, she’d kept her task private and, despite her family’s best efforts, she refused to reveal her secret—only telling them they’d all know by Christmas.

Hetty was already planning her gifts for the Wheeler family. She was making several outfits for Lottie’s doll, a set of embroidered lace handkerchiefs for Elizabeth, and a warm flannel shirt for Elias. It was Isaac’s gift that troubled her. She wasn’t sure what she should give him. And since she hadn’t yet had the chance to confront him about his feelings, she didn’t want to overstep any boundaries. Luckily, she still had a bit of time to decide. Thanksgiving was still a couple weeks away. Maybe she’d find something in town on her next trip. She wasn’t sure when that would be though, considering the weather might even keep them from attending church this week.
This also gives me more time to decide what to tell Joshua
, Hetty thought. For now, though, she needed to give the day’s baking her full attention.

Isaac listened as Hetty moved through the kitchen. He smelled the bread baking and it made his mouth water.
The woman surely can cook
, he thought. While Elizabeth’s meals had never disappointed her family, Hetty’s cooking held a sense of pride. He could see the joy she took in feeding his family. It never seemed like a chore, more like something she loved to do. And he loved watching her.

He looked over at Elias, his eyes closed as he rested in the chair. Winter naps were one of the few luxuries Elias allowed himself, and Isaac hated to interrupt. He hadn’t slept the past few nights, and he knew it was due to what Elias had said. If he didn’t make things right with Hetty he’d watch her begin her life with someone else. And he couldn’t make things right with Hetty until he told his brother about his past mistakes. His stomach dropped. He couldn’t continue holding things inside. Elias needed to know, and it was now or never. 

“Lottie, why don’t you go see if Hetty has a snack for you in the kitchen,” Isaac whispered and watched his sweet niece scamper away.

He took a deep breath. “Elias.”

No response.

“Elias!” he said a bit louder.

Elias opened his eyes and looked over at Isaac. “You must have a good reason for interrupting my winter nap, brother.”

“I need to talk to you.” Isaac’s face was firm. He had to do this. And it terrified him. But he knew he could never accept his feelings for Hetty without his brother’s blessing.

“Okay.”

“It’s about Rachel.”

Isaac watched his brother’s eyes go dark. This wasn’t going to be easy. “Elias, I need to tell you something about the day she died.”

Elias continued to hold Isaac’s gaze, not saying a word.

“The reason she fell and hit her head that day is because she was chasing after me. And, the reason she was chasing after me is because...” He paused. “Because she didn’t want me telling you that we...”

“That you what?” Elias asked, already showing anger in his voice.

Isaac turned his eyes away. “That we kissed.”

In a split second Elias was out of the chair. He pulled Isaac’s shirt and threw him against the wall. “You son of a...” Fire burned in his eyes.