Stay (17 page)

The dinner surprise? Reservations at The Plaza.

Once we were seated, Max took my hand in his, making
little circles on my palm. Our table was set for four. I’d barely
unfolded the napkin across my lap when an older coupled joined us.
The resemblance was uncanny.

Max smiled as he stood to kiss her on the cheek.
“Mom, Dad, this is Maggie.” I almost choked on my own saliva. How
could he do this?

I stood up to greet them. Max had his father’s
striking facial features, but he had his mother’s eyes and hair
color. “It’s lovely to meet you, Maggie. Max has all good things to
say,” his mother spoke softly, eyeing me up.

Max turned to me. “I have something I wanted to talk
to you about. I was going to do this privately tomorrow, but since
you’re hell-bent on leaving, I’d like to talk to you about it now.
And my folks have been itching to meet you. They’re in town for a
case my dad is consulting on.”

I bit down nervously on my lip. I thought I should
look for a small blue box, but then laughed at myself. “Sure.”

He held my gaze. “I got to thinking about you not
living here and how you don’t have a job yet. What would you say if
I were to offer you the money to start up a bakery?”

Shocked, I asked. “What are you talking about?”

He pulled my other hand into his. “There’s a catch.
Like I said, it would be here with me-not in Chicago. I thought
long and hard about this, Maggie.” He glanced over to his father,
smiling, and then nodded. “My dad already agreed to lend us the
money. You could open up a small shop in the Village or in
Brooklyn. I don’t care where. I’d love to do this for you. For us.
To get you back here.”

“But,” I peered down at our conjoined hands, unable
to grasp what he’d offered. I was unable to face his parents. I was
stunned, shocked. I was speechless. I leaned closer, whispering,
“You said you’d never go to your dad for a handout.”

He raised my hands, kissing the tips of knuckles,
smiling. “Things change.”

I shook my head vehemently. “I can’t. I won’t ask
you to do that. And I don’t know if I could come back yet. Jeremy
and Luke...”

He cut me off. “Jeremy and Luke are big boys, babe.
You don’t need to take care of anyone but yourself.” He was right
and I knew it, but I felt such a responsibility toward them now,
that I just couldn’t leave them.

“I don’t think it would work. I have no business
sense. I wouldn’t even know where to begin,” I fumbled with each
word, trying to make sense of everything he was offering me, but
was instead getting more upset thinking about it.

“Listen. I can.” he said, eyes on me. “I agreed to
go back to law school if he loaned me the money.”

I stood quickly. “What? No. I won’t let you change
for me, Max.” His parents gasped when I raised my voice. He told me
so many times he didn’t want to be a lawyer, I was not pushing him
toward it. “I can’t believe you would do this. This is not how I
wanted it to happen.”

He shushed and nudged me back down to my seat,
glancing around the room. He looked embarrassed by my outburst.
“So, you’d rather wither away in Chicago with your brother and his
friends?”

“That’s not fair, Max.”

“Excuse us for a moment, won’t you?” he said to his
parents as he led me away from the table. God, who was this? He was
acting so different around them. Where was my lighthearted, fun
Max?

Once in the hallway, he took me to the side. “Why
couldn’t you make love to me last night? Were you really tired,
Maggie?”

“I can’t have this conversation here. How could you
spring them on me? And the loan? How could you?”

“Fine,” he snapped. “Wait here.” He went back inside
but came out a few minutes later, clearly upset. I was still trying
to figure out what the hell was going on. What was he thinking? I
know how he felt for me, how much he missed me, but this was too
much.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me out onto the
bustling city streets. Without stopping, he hailed a cab. The ride
back was silent, but I could hear muffled swearing coming from his
side of the car, making me jumpy.

Hesitantly, I followed him upstairs. Once we were
inside, he turned to me. “Can you have the conversation here?”

“Yeah,” I whimpered.

He raised one eyebrow, surprised. “Good. Now answer
my last question.”

“Because I’m confused.”

“You’re confused about what? Me?”

“Yes.”

He ran a hand through his hair and paced in front of
me. “That’s great, Maggie. I’m standing here offering you me, your
dream, and you’re fucking confused.” He started to slam his fist to
the wall behind me, but stopped when he saw my face.

I flinched at his reaction.

“It’s not that simple, Max. I care for you. I do.
It’s just so much has happened that I’m not sure what’s best for
me. I don’t think it’s fair to make you think otherwise. I want you
in my life, but I’m not taking a handout from your dad. And I am
not letting you go down that road that you never wanted to be on.
You’ve helped me through so much, Max. It’s just Luke and I...”

He stepped up, stopping me from finishing, and
grabbed my chin in his fingers. “Do you love me, Maggie?”

“I...I care for you deeply.”

“Fuck!”

He stormed past me toward the front door. “Where are
you going?”

“Out. You can take my bed. I’ll sleep on the couch
when I get back.”

Only Max never came back that night. I waited until
my cab pulled up to take me to the airport. I left a note on his
bed telling him how sorry I was, and how much I wish I could take
him up on his offer, but it just wasn’t possible right now.

There was no way he was footing the bill for my
dream. I wanted to make something of myself on my own.

Chapter 16

Luke

I felt stupid when Jeremy told me he’d called
Maggie. The last thing I needed was her pity, but apparently I’d
asked for her while I was out of it. I honestly had no intentions
to kill myself. I just downed one too many pills with a glass of
Jack to numb myself. Maggie running off to New York to be with him
was breaking my heart. I couldn’t bear to lose her again. Not after
everything I’d been through. I couldn’t save my family, but I sure
as hell could save her. If she would only let me.

That one night with Maggie reawakened every bit of
me. There was something about Maggie that made me feel like I
wouldn’t make it without her. I couldn’t breathe when she wasn’t in
my life. It had been two damn years since I’d felt so good, so
alive. I wasn’t ready to let it slip away again. Not when it was so
close that I could reach out and grab hold of it.

Jeremy forced me to lie down while he went for
groceries. Dean was my guard dog for the hour to make sure I didn’t
try anything stupid. There wasn’t much I could do since all my
pills were gone, and the doctor wouldn’t write me another
prescription. That thought normally would have me in panic mode.
But, I decided I was ready to give up my vices.

So when the door bounced open, the last person I’d
expected to see was Maggie. But there she was, staring at me from
the front door, tears in her eyes. Her bag dropped to the floor,
and she walked quickly over to me.

“Are you okay? What were you thinking, Luke?”

“Thanks, Jer,” I said to myself and then forced
myself to stare into her baby blues. “Obviously I wasn’t, Mags.
Nice of you to come home to check on me.”

“Knock it off right now, Luke Matthews.” She leaned
over, shoving my legs back against the couch so she could sit in
front of me. “What happened?”

“Nothing. I took some Xanax with my old friend Jack
and I guess it was too much. I’m fine. You didn’t need to come
home. I thought you were staying a few days.”

“Don’t you dare try and change the subject. I jumped
on stand-by to get home. Now, why do you have Xanax?”

“Why do you smoke?” When she didn’t respond, I
sighed. “I don’t want to do this right now, Maggie.” I wanted her
by my side, but not like this. Not all uppity and judgmental. I was
also pissed that asshole got two nights with her. It made my skin
crawl to think about him touching her the way she’d let me a few
nights ago.

She fell onto her side, scooting in front of me,
pulling my arm over her waist. “Stop being mad at me, and stop
acting like a jerk.” I could hear her crying and it broke my
heart.

I stiffened while holding her, even though holding
her came as natural as breathing. “That’s the thing, though. I am
mad at you, Maggie.”

“I know you are,” she whispered. She tightened her
grip on my forearm.

“Why did you have to go?”

“Because I needed to go for me, for him, for you. I
never loved anyone but you, and Max helped me so much. I owed him
that visit. I wanted to feel guilty about being with you, but I
didn’t. I mean, I did a little, but I just needed to see him. I
feel like such a whore.” She started to cry, so I pulled her in
closer.

“You’re not a whore.” I paused, kissing the back of
her head. “Maggie, God! Do you have any idea how hard it is for me
to look at you and know that you were with him after leaving me and
what we did? I know I should just be happy that you’re alive and
back, but I can’t get the image out of my head.”

She was silent for a minute, but then whispered, “I
wasn’t. I couldn’t be with him.”

She curled into me, and I could hear her soft
whimpering. I pulled down the blanket over us and didn’t say
anything else, since in my head I’d started to rationalize what
she’d been going through. And part of me did understand her
motives. He’d been the one to fix her this time, and she was always
loyal to a fault. I made my decision as I held her. If she really
wanted Max, I would let her go. It would suck, but I’d do it if it
meant seeing a smile on her face.

Jeremy returned an hour later, moving around the
front of the sofa to say something to me, but I held up a finger to
keep him quiet. Maggie was fast asleep tucked under my arm. He
raised his eyebrows.

“I see you had a happy reunion. You glad I called
her now?” he said quietly, a shit-eating, I-told-you-so grin on his
face.

I flipped him off, but shot him a smile before he
walked away. Selfishly, I was glad he called her. I had no idea how
much seeing her, holding her would fix the gaping hole in my chest.
I also had no idea what in the world was going on inside that
beautiful head of hers, but I was willing to figure it out. There
was no way I’d stop now. Not until she told me to.

“What are you thinking about?” Maggie asked, pulling
me out of a memory.

I grinned and smiled down at her. “You’re awake,
huh?”

She smiled back sheepishly, nodding. “I was thinking
about that time that you broke both your wrists on my
trampoline.”

She laughed softly. “How could I forget? You and
Jeremy had to carry my food to the cafeteria, help me eat, and take
notes for me for eight weeks.”

“Yeah, that was nice.”

She sat up, hitting my chest. “Nice?”

“Yeah, I liked taking care of you. Even when I was
only thirteen. The point is, I still do.”

“You’re ridiculous,” she said, but she smiled and
snuggled into my chest.

I rubbed circles on her back, trying to get her to
sleep. It was something that always worked when we were together;
usually, she’d be out within ten minutes. But it wasn’t working
this time, and I could tell she had something on her mind.

“Is it too early to ask what happened in New
York?”

She stayed quiet for a full minute before she
answered, “Yeah, it’s too early to ask.”

“Okay.” That was a good-enough answer for me.
Something went down, and I sure as hell hoped it tipped the odds in
my favor.

Once Maggie went into her room, Dean and Jeremy
kicked me off the couch to play
Call of Duty
. I still felt
like shit but took it as my cue to shower.

The shower did some good, but I wasn’t quite up for
anything crazy. I’d be happy to lie back and let whatever Maggie
had up her sleeve happen. I could tell earlier that whatever had
gone down in New York was upsetting her, but I also saw hope when
she’d lifted her beautiful face to smile at me. Until she told me
no I wasn’t going to give up. If she wanted out-fine. I’d deal. But
I wasn’t go down without a fight.

When I emerged, Maggie was at the front door paying
for a pizza and the two numbskulls I called my best friends were
still battling it out on the Xbox. As soon as she saw me, she
smiled that pretty little smile of hers and held up the pizza. “I
got your favorite: meatball, sausage, and pepperoni.

“And that is why I love you.”

Maggie blushed, then turned, grabbed four plates
down and then cracked open two beers. I went to reach for one, but
she smacked my hand away. “Not for you.”

I tried to give her my best pouty face, but she
wasn’t having any of it. “That face is not going to work,
Matthews.” She pranced by me to hand the beers to the guys. When
she came back around, she reached in the fridge and handed me a
bottle of water.

“Thanks,” I muttered. Who was I kidding? She was
right. I shouldn’t be drinking yet.

“I got to thinking while I was in the shower.”

She held up her hands playfully. “Oh, no, you were
thinking?”

“Smartass. Are you planning on staying around for a
while?”

“Yeah,” she answered softly.

“You need a job, and one of the girls they hired
quit before she even started. So I could help you out. It’s not
much, but they make good tips.”

“Why’d she quit if the tips were going to be
good?”

“I’m just going to be honest with you. It was my
fault. She was pissed at me for something, and she didn’t want to
be around me.”

“What the heck did you do?”

I took a long swig of water. “You don’t need the
details. It was a long time ago.” I thought for sure she was going
to keep pressing, but she stayed quiet, watching me eat for another
minute. I didn’t think it was imperative that Maggie knew that I’d
been so bombed one time after she disappeared that I called another
girl the wrong name all night, even during sex. Hell, I wouldn’t
even have known if the girl hadn’t left me a scathing voicemail the
next day.