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Jimmy was behind the bar with another bartender
named Tracy. She slid me a lemon drop-I did one every night before
work to give me that little extra something to keep the confidence
going. I’d never been much of a drinker, so I never got drunk, but
it was enough to take away my inhibitions of prancing around half
naked. I tipped it back, grimacing as it burned going down, praying
that my night would go smoothly.

Taking one last deep breath, hands gripped to the
bar was when one of my mini panic attacks started. They were always
the same. My body temperature would rise twenty degrees quicker
than a bat out of hell. I knew why this was happening. It wasn’t
fear of seeing Luke or Jeremy; it was fear that I lost that
opportunity.

Chapter 6

Luke

By the time we left the hotel, it was eleven,
and I was sweating bullets. Even though I’d been so tired last
night, I hadn’t slept. Apparently Xanax can let you down too. My
mind reeled with the fear of possibly finding her only to lose her
all over again. I was nervous as hell, but Dean seemed cool as a
cucumber. I was sure it had nothing to do with Phoebe latched to
his side, sucking on his earlobe every two seconds.

I couldn’t for the life of me, stop the perspiration
dripping from my forehead. This was it. I’d been selfishly praying
the last few days that we would finally find her, not really
thinking about what Jeremy was going to do. I mean, sure, I’d
thought about it a few times, but the only thing I could really
think of was dragging her ass back home where it belonged.

With me.

The thought of coming back sooner than today-and
alone-had popped into my head several times, but I knew I had to do
this right or risk losing her all over again. All three of us could
convince her to come home. Me alone. I wasn’t so confident anymore
when it came to Maggie. She didn’t trust my love then, why would
she now?

So many things had gone through my brain these past
few days, I couldn’t keep track. What if we did find her? What if
she runs? What if she refused to come home? What if she’s with
someone new? Did I really want her back, or was it because I lost
my whole family? Would she be able to fix me? What about that huge
fucking hole carved out of my chest when she walked out? Why was it
so easy for her? How could she not remember everything we talked
about? Now it was all gone, every word spoken, every look given.
Like none of it ever mattered.

Jeremy was laughing when we walked up to the door.
“A titty bar? You’re taking me to a titty bar?”

Dean and I exchanged a quick glance. I felt like I
was about to puke. My nerves were getting the better of me. We paid
the cover. It wasn’t the same dude out front, so that was at least
one thing in our favor. I didn’t want to get recognized right off
the bat. I grabbed Dean and pulled him out of Phoebe’s grip. “Head
right for the back bar. I don’t want to give that prick one second
to warn her.”

Dean nodded. We walked inside, greeted by blasting
music, three girls on stage, one girl twirling on the pole, and the
other two rubbing up against each other like they were ready to get
busy on stage. It was hot. But we were there for other reasons.
Jeremy started to make his way over to the stage, until I grabbed
him by the collar. “This way, loverboy.”

“I think we should tell him,” I said to Dean as
quietly as possible.

I scanned the bar area but didn’t see the same guy
from last time. I relaxed instantly. I ordered three beers, a vodka
cranberry for Phoebe, taking stock of the place for several seconds
before she finally came into view. All the air rushed out of me. I
was so choked up finally seeing her alive, knowing that she was
really okay that I couldn’t move.

Dean and Jeremy were talking shit about
Call of
Duty
again, but I couldn’t take my eyes off her. There was
always something about Maggie that drove me wild. She looked
amazing, half naked, but amazing, and breathtaking. She had on this
sexy, sheer baby-doll thing with stockings that stopped at her
thighs with little clips hooking them underneath. My fists clenched
at my sides seeing her so out there, so naked for others to see and
touch. I was the only one who got to see her like that. It was
really pissing me off. What the fuck happened to my sweet
Maggie?

I continued to stare at her, unable to move. Fear
gripped me. That annoying little inner voice told me how much I
lost because of her, how much she hurt me. How much I started to
hate her for not trusting me to protect her, leaving me alone to
cling to the only thing I could-the past. I had to tell myself to
shut up. This was Maggie, and she was finally in the same room
where I could reach out, touch her, kiss her.

She was more beautiful than I remembered, and
so...Shit! I didn’t know what to think. She had that crazy outfit
on, but to be honest, I couldn’t rip my eyes away. The only thing I
wanted to do was throw a damn blanket over her to cover her up.
Seeing her again was like a fucking lightning bolt striking me
down, taking me out in one fell swoop.

I needed to make a move. Say something. Do
something. I steadied myself before finally turning to Jeremy. “I
need you to do something for me,” I told him.

He shook his head, taking a long swig of his beer.
“What? You want me to buy you a lap dance?”

I stared straight into his eyes, nervously. I
swallowed hard. I gave Dean one quick glance, and then looked at
Jer. “Do you trust me, man?”

“What the fuck kind of question is that?”

I peered over his shoulder to make sure she was
still at the other end of the club before focusing back on Jeremy.
“Don’t...just don’t freak out and make a scene. She’ll run again.”
Slowly I turned him around to face the far right corner. Maggie was
smiling down at a table full of assholes. One kept running his hand
up her leg, and I was ready to go over and kick some serious ass,
but I refrained. She wasn’t mine anymore. She made that clear in
her letter and with her absence the last twenty odd months.

Once his eyes found her, he mumbled, “Fuck! Is
that…” He looked back and forth between Dean and me. His beer
bottle slipped out of his hand, shattering to the floor. Before I
could grab hold of him, he sprinted to the other side of the bar,
yelling out her name. Maggie turned, her hand lifting to her mouth.
Jeremy crashed into her and lifted her off her feet, spinning her
around and around. Tears were falling down his face, her face- hell
they were even falling down mine at that point. The whole bar was
staring, the dancers had stopped, and big-ass bouncer guy was
heading toward them. I grabbed Dean.

“Let’s go.”

Maggie looked over Jeremy’s shoulder, and our eyes
locked when she saw me coming for her. She whispered something,
tapping Jeremy on the shoulder, and then slipped out of his arms,
allowing me to hold her next. I couldn’t let go. I heard people
hollering, someone yelling for me to get my hands off her, but I
couldn’t do it. I couldn’t let go. She even smelled the same.
Someone’s hands were ripping her away from me. Jeremy was barely
able to stand from shock, and Maggie was crying. Hard. Dean grabbed
hold of me as I was torn from her grip. I looked up to see big-ass
bouncer dude’s fist. Maggie yelled to stop, but it was too late. I
went down.

Maggie screamed at him while I was tried to get my
bearings. Jeremy was now sitting on the dirty floor next to me, too
stunned to move. Dean tried to grab Maggie, but bouncer guy shook
him off. And Phoebe, who looked like she fit in here a hell of a
lot more than Maggie did, just watched without a single clue as to
what was going on.

“Maggie!” Some guy came up from a back room, glanced
at the scene, and then looked back to Maggie. “Maggie, I’m sorry,
darling but these boys need to leave. People come here to forget
for a little while, and these three are causing a scene.”

“But, Jimmy. I can’t leave them right now. Please,”
she begged.

He glanced down at Jer and me. “Who are they?”

“It’s my family. They just found me.”

He ran his fingers over the scruff on his chin.
“Take off. But, be back for your shift tomorrow night. One more
chance, Maggie and that’s final. You can’t bring your personal shit
into my club. I love you girly but you know the rules.”

Maggie nodded. “Understood. It won’t happen
again.”

Jeremy and I both looked at each other, rolling our
eyes. If she thought we were letting her come back to this fucking
dump, she had another thing coming.

Maggie trained her eyes down for a minute, but then
back to Dean. “I’ll be outside in five minutes. I got to grab my
things.”

We weren’t taken out by force, but rather ushered
out not so nicely by bouncer guy, who flipped us off and told us to
never come back. Dean sent Phoebe back to the hotel. Maggie came
out a few minutes later wearing sweats, her hair down. I swallowed
at the sight of her, unable to move, but Jeremy didn’t hesitate. He
grabbed hold of her one more time, shaking like a leaf. He mumbled
a thousand questions, but Maggie remained calm.

“Jer, please, give me a minute to get my thoughts
together.” He nodded, wiping the snot off his nose with his sleeve.
She peeked back at me cautiously. “I guess we can go back to my
place.”

I wanted to grab her and run away, never to look
back, but I couldn’t take that moment away from Jeremy. I wouldn’t.
She walked us up to a brick building that was several stories high.
The steps were falling apart, paint chipping, and inside the halls
reeked of cumin. The three of us grimaced as we followed her
upstairs.

Once she unlocked four or maybe even five locks, she
stepped aside to let us in. I hadn’t said anything to her yet. I
hadn’t even mumbled her name. I had so much to say, I didn’t know
my head from my ass.

“How’d you find me?” she asked innocently.

Jeremy had no idea, and I still hadn’t found my
voice. “Luke and I spotted you a couple of days ago,” Dean
answered.

“You just happened to walk into the one club in all
of New York that I work in?”

Dean shrugged. “Yeah, pretty much.”

Jeremy’s eyes were bugging out of his head, and I
knew he was going to blow any second. “What the fuck do you mean, a
couple days ago, Dean?”

I jumped in front of Dean to take the heat. “It’s my
fault, Jer. You want to punch someone, punch me.” I knew I wanted
to punch someone-anyone. So he must want to as well.

“How could you not tell me? You of all people.” He
looked crushed when he addressed me. And I knew what he meant.

“I didn’t see her. Dean did. It was the night you
got sick. We stayed there until closing, but she never came back. I
thought he was wrong. I didn’t want to get your hopes up. I’m
sorry.”

“This is where you’ve been, Maggie? This whole
time?”

She bit down on her bottom lip, something she’d done
since she was little whenever she got nervous. “No. I’ve only been
here for six months.”

“How could you not call me? Let me know you’re
alive. Do you have any idea, Maggie, what your disappearing did to
me, to Luke? To Mom and Dad. Oh, shit!” He stopped speaking, but
paced around the small area she now called home.

I was trying to put the pieces together when Jeremy
dropped onto the edge of her bed. “Mags, I don’t know how to tell
you this.” Then it clicked.

She knelt down in front of him, resting her head on
his knees. “Dad...Dad is gone.” Her head shot up, and then she sat
back on her heels, covering her face. I’m not sure if she was
crying because she was sad or because she was happy to hear the
bastard died. Jeremy scooped her up, hugging her, explaining what
happened. Maggie’s phone went off for the fifth time in the last
ten minutes.

Maggie stepped out of his grip, grabbed her phone,
typed in something, and then pressed a button that buzzed by the
front door. She turned to me but didn’t look me in the eyes. “I’m
sorry, Luke.”

At first I thought she was apologizing for leaving
me. For never calling me or texting me that she was okay, but a
second later, the bartender from the other night stormed through
the door.

And he was one pissed-off motherfucker.

He looked like a caged animal glancing around the
room. He noticed Dean and me first, but then his eyes slipped over
to Jeremy. And there really was no denying that they were family.
They had the same damn blue eyes that sometimes I even had a hard
time looking into.

“What happened?” he yelled at Maggie. She seemed
surprised at his tone, but just shook him off. When I stepped
closer, he snatched her, pulling her away from me. I didn’t like
how possessive he was acting, and I certainly didn’t enjoy seeing
her being manhandled by another guy.

“Who’s your friend, Mags?” I sounded like a jealous
asshole, but there really was no hiding how I felt. It took every
ounce of restraint not to kick his ass.

“Um, this is Max. Max, this is Luke,” she said. She
turned toward the bed and pointed her finger. “That’s Dean. And
that’s my brother, Jeremy.”

Max shifted his glare away from us, and back to
Maggie. “I called five times. Why didn’t you pick up? I went by to
watch you work, and they told me.”

“I bet you like watching her work, huh?”

He stepped past Maggie. “I’m not hurting you right
now because I know all about you and it would hurt Maggie.” His
eyes found hers again. “What do you want me to do, babe?”

Babe? What the fuck?

“You know who I am, huh?” I pushed Maggie gently
aside to get in front of him. “So, I guess that means you know that
we were together, that I,” I slammed my own chest, “was her first,
and you...you are nobody.”

“Luke!” Maggie screamed. Dean sprang up, wrapping
his burly arms around me, holding me back.

She turned back to Max. “I’m sorry. I think maybe
you should go. I’ll call you tomorrow. I need to talk to them.”