The Girl With No Past (36 page)

Ben reached out his other arm and placed it on her shoulder. ‘Please, Natalie, just trust me. I’m doing this for you. I need to get her secured. Can we use the front room?’ His eyes flicked to a door on the right.

Miss Hollis pulled away from him. ‘No, no, no, Ben. This is all wrong. Take her away.’

But he shook his head. ‘I can’t do that. Do you know how hard I’ve worked to get her here? Do you have any idea? All the planning and risks. I did it all for you, Natalie.’

She studied his face and there was no way to tell what conclusion she was reaching. Until she spoke. ‘Just go in there,’ she said, her voice quiet.

Ben opened the door and pushed me through, finally letting go of his vice-like grip. I tried to rub my arm but he pushed me to the floor. There was no carpet this time, just exposed floorboards, and I landed with a thud that made my whole body vibrate.

She had been standing in the doorway but she came forward then, moving slowly before perching on the side of the sofa. I couldn’t look at her. I didn’t want to see her expression as Ben once again yanked rope around my wrists and ankles. It must have been in his pockets; I hadn’t noticed him carrying it.

‘That’s better,’ he said, leaving me on the floor while he joined Miss Hollis on the sofa.

I stared at the wooden floor, mentally tracing out the patterns in the wood, anything to avoid both of them as much as possible. But I couldn’t shut out the sound of Ben’s voice as he recounted everything he’d done to me. I wasn’t surprised to learn it was all him. The break-in, the water attack, the mugging. All of it had been down to Ben. And I listened as he told Miss Hollis how he ruined the promotion for me at work.

‘All it took was a word in her boss’s ear,’ he said.

I could tell without looking at him that he was smiling. He was proud of it, as if he’d achieved a great feat by destroying my life. But I could tell he was the most pleased about Julian.

‘You know, she actually thought she had a chance at happiness with him. But I took it away from her, just like she did to you. Are you pleased, Natalie? Tell me you’re pleased.’

And then I did look across at them. I needed to see her reaction. She placed her hand on his knee, stroking it gently. ‘You did great, Ben. Thank you.’

His smile stretched across the whole of his face, but then quickly disappeared as he turned to me. ‘I think it’s about time you apologised, Leah, don’t you? All these years and you’ve not once tried to put things right with Natalie. That’s not right, is it? So go on, what are you waiting for?’

No matter what he was doing to me, he was right about that. I did need to apologise and I needed to do it now. I didn’t know how much longer I had left but I couldn’t let this chance go by. I turned to her and for a second the blonde teacher she had been flashed before me.

‘I am sorry,’ I said, my voice as shaky as my body. ‘I know that’s not enough, it will never be enough, but…please believe me. I had no idea what Adam was planning. He told us—’

‘I don’t want to hear what he told you,’ she said, fixing her eyes on me. ‘It’s bad enough I’ve had to live with what he did all these years, I don’t need to hear more about it now. Do you know he killed my baby?’

I got choked up then because it felt different hearing it from her rather than Ben. More real.

‘Look around you,’ she said. ‘Listen. What do you hear?’

When I didn’t say anything, she shouted her question at me, forcing me to respond.

‘Nothing. There’s nothing.’

‘Exactly. No children. No husband. Nothing. This is my life. Tim and I didn’t last after that, how could we when I couldn’t even let him touch me? It wasn’t his fault, he tried to make it work but I pushed him away and there’s been no one since. I couldn’t even teach any more. But you didn’t care about that, did you?’

‘I’m sorry,’ I repeated, knowing any words I said would be futile.

Ben snorted. ‘We talked about karma earlier, didn’t we, Leah?’ He turned back to Miss Hollis. ‘So she knows she has to pay for what she did. She’s clear about that.’

‘Good,’ Miss Hollis said, staring straight at me. ‘Good.’

Ben leaned forward and whispered into her ear, so I could only make out a few words.
Bridge. River. Suicide.
Each word was like a bomb exploding in my chest, but at least I had a sense now of what he was planning. What
they
were planning.

Ben walked over to me. ‘I suppose you think this is unfair, don’t you, Leah? That you’re not responsible because you left the house? That it was all Adam and Corey and Imogen? But you see, things have already been put straight with them because they’re already dead, aren’t they?’

‘It…it was an accident…a terrible—’

‘Yes, such a shame. Road accidents are just so heartbreaking, aren’t they? No wonder you never got behind the wheel again. Anyway, my point is they’ve paid for what they did, and now it’s your turn.’ He stood up then and leaned down by my feet, pulling out his knife and waving it in front of me.

I flinched, squeezing my eyes shut tightly as if it would prevent me feeling pain. This wasn’t what they had planned. Why was he changing things? But then I felt the ropes around my ankles loosen. I opened my eyes again, just to check I wasn’t already dead.

‘We’d better get going soon,’ Miss Hollis said.

Ben stood up and walked over to her. ‘I just need the bathroom. I’ve been holding it in since we left London and my bladder’s about to burst.’

Miss Hollis stood up. ‘Hurry, though. First door on the left at the top of the stairs. Hurry.’

He glanced at me. ‘Watch her. Actually, take this.’ He held the knife out towards Miss Hollis. At first she didn’t move, but then she slowly reached for it. ‘You’ll be fine if you have to use it,’ he said, squeezing her shoulder. And then he rushed out, leaving the two of us alone.

As soon as the door had closed, Miss Hollis stepped towards me, holding the knife out in front of her, pointing it straight at me.

‘I’m sorry, please, I’m sorry.’

‘Leah, shut up.’ Her voice was a whisper. ‘We’ve got about sixty seconds before he gets back down here so just keep quiet.’

Before I could interpret what she was saying, she bent down and sliced through the rope around my wrists, pulling me up and guiding me towards the door.

‘Come on, you can do it, just try to move quickly. Lean on me.’ She helped me out and then we were in the hall. Stopping for a second, she looked upstairs, but then nodded. ‘It’s okay, he’s still in there. Come on.’

Outside, the night air hit me like another punch, making the wounds I already had throb. But I didn’t care. She was helping me. Miss Hollis was getting me away from Ben.

‘My car’s across the road,’ she said, pulling the front door but not closing it. ‘We have to try and run, Leah.’ And then she was tugging me along, neither of us daring to look back at the house.

She pressed her key fob and the lights of her car flashed, then guiding me into the passenger seat, she slammed the door and rushed round to her side.

With my heart feeling as if it would explode, I turned to look at the house and there he was. Standing in the doorway, shouting words I couldn’t make out. He ran down the path but at the same time Miss Hollis was slamming and locking her door. She turned her key in the ignition and fired up the engine, just as Ben reached us, pounding on her window with his fists.

‘Natalie!’ he cried. ‘What are you doing? Open the door!’

But then we were screeching away, and I watched in the side mirror as Ben became a small dot in the distance.

Neither of us spoke until we were a safe distance from Miss Hollis’s road. We’d been driving for almost ten minutes when she pulled into a petrol station and fished her mobile from her pocket.

‘Police, please,’ she said, and for a moment I wondered if she was calling them to take me away. That was the problem with a guilty conscience. But when she gave them Ben’s details and told them what he’d done, my breathing slowed.

‘I’m sorry, Leah,’ she said, once she’d finished the call. ‘I can’t believe what he did to you.’

‘But why? How?’

‘I used to teach Ben. He was in the year below you and, well, he was always attached to me. Always used to spend break and lunchtimes in my classroom, just chatting. I shouldn’t have let him, I know that now. But I was young and I couldn’t see that he was becoming obsessed. I guess I thought of us both as outcasts at the school and I wanted to help him, stop him being bullied. Anyway, after…you know… he kept in contact. I thought it was harmless at first, but then he was so overprotective and it just got weird. He never tried anything inappropriate, but would always call or email to see how I was. I guess I believed he was only being kind. I had no idea what he was doing to you. That he was so fixated on punishing you, so disturbed. I should have seen it, Leah. But I suppose it was nice after the way most of the kids treated me. Again, I’m so sorry.’

I listened to her words but didn’t want, or need, her to apologise. She was the last person who should ever say sorry to me.

‘Why do you think he waited so long to do this? It’s been years.’

She shook her head. ‘I’m not sure. But a few months ago I told him we shouldn’t speak any more, and I used the excuse that our friendship just reminded me of the past. Perhaps that set him off.’

We stayed silent for a while, both of us watching the cashier in the petrol station. I couldn’t believe I was sitting in a car with Miss Hollis. After all these years. And even more shocking than that was the fact she had saved me from Ben.

‘But…don’t you think I should be punished for what happened?’ I said. I needed to know how she felt about me.

She tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. ‘I think you already have. Double. Triple. Plus, you lost your best friends in that horrible accident. I heard all about that. It can’t be easy having to live with knowing…’ She didn’t need to finish the sentence.

‘Can I ask you something else? It’s something I never understood. Why did the police drop the charges?’

‘I asked them to. I withdrew my statement.’

Shocked, I struggled to form my next question. ‘But…why didn’t you want Adam to go to prison for what he did? Or Imogen and Corey for…watching it all? Or me?’

Natalie takes a deep breath. ‘At first I did. But then I realised I’d be reliving it over and over if it went to court. I couldn’t handle that. It wasn’t an easy decision, though.’

She turned to me and I saw the glimmer of tears in her eyes.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’

‘I hated you, Leah. For a long time. All this time, really. But…I know you were the only one who cooperated with the police. Your statement would have made all the difference if I’d seen it through. You told the truth while the others stuck together with their lie. That means something.’

‘I’m so sorry,’ I said again.

‘Anyway, you’ll be all right now, Leah, I promise. Make a life for yourself. Don’t waste it. Don’t do what I’ve done. Neither of us should have to suffer any more than we already have.’

I wanted to speak, to say something that would show her how grateful I was, but no words would form. Instead, I nodded, and hoped she could see the gratitude in my eyes.

‘Let’s get you home,’ she said. ‘You live in London, don’t you? It will take us about three hours from here. Have you got someone you can stay with, just in case. I mean, I don’t know how long it will take them to find him so you shouldn’t be alone.’

I was choked up by her kindness. ‘Where are we?’ I managed to say.

‘Dudley. West Midlands. That’s my mum’s house. She died a few years ago and I moved in.’

She started up the engine and began our long drive. It was only when we reached the motorway that I turned to her. ‘If you don’t mind, I mean, if it’s okay, could you drop me at my mum’s? In Watford?’ As soon as I asked it I regretted being so selfish. How could I expect her to go back there when it was bound to cause her pain?

‘No problem,’ she said, offering me a sad smile.

The next morning was creeping in by the time we got to Mum’s, but it was still dark.

‘If you don’t mind, I won’t wait around,’ Miss Hollis said, helping me out of the car. ‘But here’s my number if you need anything. And the police will want a statement from you. Just tell them everything. You should go to the local station as soon as you can.’