The Impossible Art of Falling (Impossible Art #1) (20 page)

"Now, let me finish cleaning you up, and then we had better go inside and talk to my aunt and uncle."

THIRTY MINUTES LATER, LUKE was cleaned up and feeling better. There were finally no more secrets between the two of them, and he felt a heavy weight lift away. He tensed a bit as they walked toward the house, a funeral dirge running through his head. He worried that this would be his last day at the ranch. That Rob and Meg would tell him to leave. He worried about where he would go. He worried that he wouldn't have enough money. He worried that he would have to leave Jena.

Kyle's truck was still in the driveway when they walked by. Luke knew that they would need to talk, as well. Might as well face everything at once.

The door creaked, announcing their arrival. They walked into the living room, took in the scene, and he was instantly glad that Jena was at his side. Kyle sat slumped over in an arm chair, his legs flung out in front of him. Meg sat on the couch next to him and Rob stood at the window, staring vacantly in the distance.

"Rob, Meg," Luke started, "I am really sorry. About all of this. Kyle and I never should have… " he broke off, his hand, palm up, as a sort of offering.

"Kyle told us about your sister. If anything, I think the two of you have some things to say to each other," Meg explained. "And Rob and I have a business to run. We'll just take out smaller groups today. Jena, would you care to help us?"

Jena looked up at Luke wanting to make sure he was okay before leaving his side. He smiled in assurance then kissed her lightly on the forehead. She bent down close to his ear.

“Remember, he’s hurting, too,” Jena whispered, her words a caress.

With that, Meg, Rob, and Jena walked out, leaving Luke alone with Kyle.

Kyle knew that this conversation was a long time coming. He had hid his feelings for so long, until today. It felt like it had been a lifetime since he had been happy, and seeing Luke with Jena and seeing their happiness, just made him snap.

“Hey,” Luke said. He looked at Kyle apprehensively, choosing to keep his distance, standing at the other end of the room. Kyle was still sitting, his face red, and he held a pack of frozen peas to his bruised and swollen knuckles. Luke massaged the side of his jaw, remembering exactly how those knuckles felt.

“I’m sorry,” Kyle started to say and rose to his feet. Luke crossed his arms in front of his broad chest. He would have to say more than that for Luke to forgive him, after what he was accused of.

“The truth is,” Kyle continued, “I don’t think you had anything to do with Ali’s death. In fact, I think the opposite. I think I’m the one who got her killed.”

Luke sucked in a breath, and felt as if he had been punched in the gut. Again. “She was killed in a car accident, Kyle. She got herself drunk and wrapped her car around that damned tree.”

“I know,” Kyle said, standing up and taking a step toward Luke. “I didn’t stop her. We got in a fight that night. When you got there, you saw just the end of it.”

“What were you fighting about? I never did find out.” Luke asked. He was beginning to relax, now that Kyle was talking instead of swinging.

“It was stupid, really. She thought I was cheating on her. That’s why she drank so much. Apparently, there was some rumor at school that I hooked up with some cheerleader from Knoxville. You have to believe me. I would never cheat on your sister. I… I… loved her.” Kyle stopped and swallowed hard, trying to compose himself. He had never actually said all of this out loud. “And she had already been drinking when someone planted that seed. She wouldn’t even let me explain. She just took off running. Shit, I didn’t even know she had car keys with her.

“I saw her that night. I saw her run out, and I tried to go after her. I didn’t know just how drunk she was. I chased her through the house and then lost her. I guess by then, she was already in the car.”

“So you never talked to her that night?” Kyle asked, trying to fill in the missing pieces of his story.

“No, she just vanished. I got in my car to drive home, thinking I would get to her there. That’s when I came up on her car at the tree.”

“I thought you talked to her. I thought you let her leave,” Kyle admitted. “I thought you let her take off and drive. I have blamed you this whole time when really, it was me. It was me this whole time. If only I had grabbed her and stopped her. If only I hadn’t handed her that last drink… “

“Kyle, you don’t think I’ve been blaming myself as well? Do you know how many times I have replayed that night in my mind and stopped her?” Luke said. “Here’s what I’ve learned in the last few weeks. It was no one’s fault. Neither you, nor I, could have anticipated what she would do. We didn’t force her into that car, and we certainly didn’t force her to drive into that tree. Kyle, it’s not our fault.” Luke swiped at a tear that had begun to fall. He hadn’t talked so openly about his sister since she had been killed, and it brought up too many dark feelings.

“I think, deep down, I know this, but I just can’t seem to believe it.”

“You will, someday. You will. Jena and I have been talking a lot about this sort of thing lately. She’s the one who has been helping me move on. You know, she lost her father in a riding accident. That’s why she’s here. He father died and her mother left. She had no one.  I guess we’ve both been kind of helping each other move on.” Luke shrugged.

Kyle was beginning to realize just how much he had missed between the two of them, and he immediately felt ashamed for thinking that Luke didn’t deserve to be happy with Jena.

“So, you two are a thing now?” Kyle asked, taking a seat again. He stretched his long legs back out in front of him and crossed them at the ankles. It was strange how the two men fell back into their comfortable friendship so quickly. “I’m sorry; I was kind of a jerk about her. Like I said, I guess I’m still just working through some things.”

Luke liked this side of Kyle. This was his friend. Not the guy who was cocky and belligerent.

“Yeah, we are.” Luke couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. “Like I said, we’ve both been through a lot. I love her. I know it’s just been a short time, but I really do love her. I can’t imagine living my life here without her.”

“Well then, I wish you all the best,” Kyle said, standing up and turning to go. “I really do. I will not be the person who gets in your way”

“Kyle?” Luke placed a hand on Kyle’s shoulder, stopping him for a moment. “I forgive you, you know. I don’t think you had anything to do with my sister’s death.”

“Thanks, man,” he replied and clapped him on the shoulder, too.

“And it’s okay to move on. I know it will be hard, but you shouldn’t feel guilty.”

Kyle nodded once and then slipped out the door.

Jena saw Kyle leave the house from the office, and she started toward him, eager to see how Luke was. Rob and Meg had taken the first group out, so she was alone.

“Jena,” Kyle started, when she was within earshot. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have attacked Luke like that. Especially in front of you.” Jena nodded. “I’m happy for you, by the way. Luke really is a great guy.”

“Thanks,” Jena mumbled. “Is he okay, in there?”

“Yeah, I think he is. In fact, I think he is doing better than I am, in regards to his sister. It sounds like he has you to thank for that. I’m assuming he told you what happened?”

“Yeah, a little bit. I’m sure we still have a lot of talking to do. I have my own secrets to work through.”

“He mentioned something about that. Well, just about losing your dad in a riding accident. I’m assuming that’s why you don’t ride anymore. I feel like an ass for even asking that day. I’m sorry I ever brought it up.”

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know. Neither of you did, because I didn’t want to talk about it. I didn’t want to talk to anyone,” Jena said, referring to her self-inflicted silence. “I wasn’t really being fair to you.” She shrugged. “Like I said, I’m still working through it myself.”

“Friends then?”

“Yeah, friends,” Jena answered. Kyle nodded once and then climbed into the cab of his truck.

“You aren’t staying today?”

“No, I think I need a day or so to myself. Today was kind of a wake-up call for me. Will you please let Meg and Rob know? Hopefully, they won’t be too upset.” Kyle slammed the door shut and started the engine.

“I’m sure they’ll be fine. See you later,” Jena said and this time, genuinely meant it. She stood in the driveway and watched Kyle leave. A moment later, she felt Luke walk up next to her before she saw him. He took her hand, twining her fingers with his.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

“I suppose I should be asking you that,” she turned to say.

“We’re fine now. I think a lot of blanks were filled in today … for him and for me, too. I suppose we should get back to work, now.” He let go of her hand long enough to wrap his arm around her shoulders and pull her close. She reached up for his hand again as they began to walk back toward the office, both of them feeling a bit lighter.

chapter 20

A
FTER THE HORSES WERE FED and put up for the evening, Luke and Jena walked toward the house for dinner.

"Hey." Luke grabbed Jena’s hand and turned her toward him.

"Yeah?"

"I was wondering if maybe we could take a ride somewhere after dinner. I mean, in my truck. There is something I need to do."

Jena studied his face. She took in his furrowed brow, and the frown on his lips. Even his eyes were sad.

"Sure," she answered, tentatively. "Is everything okay?"

"Well, no, but I think it will be, if you do this with me."

"Oh, okay. We can go as soon as you want to."

"Jena! Lu--," Meg shouted from the porch. She must have assumed that they were still in the barn. "Oh, you two are standing right there, and here I am, shouting for all the neighbors to hear! Dinner's ready." Meg turned back into the house.

The four of them sat down to Meg's roast beef and mashed potatoes, as if it were a normal day. Not much was said, and it made Luke nervous. Occasionally, someone would ask for something or comment about some mundane incident from the day. The longer things were left unsaid, the more worried Luke became. He was sure that they would give him a deadline as to when he needed to be out. Finally, Luke spoke, feeling that he owned Meg and Rob an explanation and just wanting to know what his future held.

"Rob, Meg, I wanted to apologize for today. I had no idea that things between me and Kyle would explode like they did. I truly meant no disrespect." Jena smiled at him in a show of support.

"Well, I can't say that I condone using your fists to solve your problems, but it sounds like that bout has been a long time coming," Rob said.

"We knew that losing your sister was really hard on you before we even offered you a place to stay. We know that your parents didn’t care, and that you had no one left here. Just because we didn't talk about it, doesn't mean that we didn't know about your life before hand," Meg added with a smile. She patted his arm as any mother would do. "The truth is, we knew that you needed someplace to come to heal. What we didn't know, when we hired Kyle, is just how close of friends you were beforehand."

“He dated my sister,” Luke offered. “Until I saw him here at the farm, we hadn’t spoken since the accident. It’s been… hard.”

“I think every single one of us at this table knows about loss and grief, Luke, and we all have different ways of dealing with it. I just hope that all of that stuff between you and Kyle is out in the open now, and there won't be any more fighting, so we can get back to running the farm as we should." Rob said and nodded in understanding at Luke.

“I certainly appreciate it.” Luke couldn't believe that he wasn't getting kicked out. He looked up at Jena and watched her mouth the words,
I told you
.

"I guess you just like to take in those of us who are broken," Jena said.

"Oh honey, we don't think you’re broken. You’re family, and you’ve been through hell and back in this past year. We offered for you to come here, because we thought that being around the horses would be good for you. I think having you here helps us, too." Meg replied. "And, we couldn't be happier for you and Luke. You two are good for each other, and you make this house a feel more like a home."

Now it was Luke who was smiling. Jena reached up and touched a tear that had strayed down her cheek. Luke pushed his plate forward and got up to stand behind Jena, his hands reaching down to rest on her shoulders.

"Speaking of… Rob, if you don't mind finishing up the chores tonight, I would like to take Jena somewhere. I know it’s a lot to ask, but after this morning, I think there is something I need to do."