The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability (43 page)

136, 201, 211, 228, 246, 281, 285 nonlatex supplies, 219, 264, 267-268,

270-271 nonlatex toys, 272 nonmonogamy, 237

nonoxynol-9, 206, 260 nurses, 31, 277 nursing homes, 7, 114 NutraSweet, 206

o

O'Brien, Mark, 103

occipital nerve, 116

occupational therapist, 215

online discussion groups, 250; see also Internet

oral sex, 3, 84, 102, 145, 150-167, 174, 184, 260, 264, 267, 274, 284; see also cunnilingus; fellatio; kissing

orgasm, 4, 33, 41, 43, 52-59, 66, 95, 111, 113, 114, 119, 120, 121, 129, 134-138, 142, 143, 146, 147, 148, 155, 158, 159, 169, 189-190, 227-229, 231-233, 275, 282-283, 285-286; and anal penetration, 175; and cervical stimulation, 58, 121; clitoral, 58; dry, 56; extended, 59; G-spot, 42, 58; multiple, 2, 53, 57-58; nonejaculatory, 57, 232-233; phantom, 136; relaxation, 58; simultaneous, 3; tension, 58; vaginal, 58; whole body, 59, 126

ostomies, 95, 139, 143

paddles, 208, 217, 235, 254

pain, 7, 10, 15, 17, 23, 24-25, 32, 37, 45,47, 67, 76, 123, 127, 129, 133, 137, 157, 162, 175, 215, 257, 259, 260, 261, 262, 270, 282, 286-287; and arousal, 52, 54; and breathing, 34; and communication, 76, 84, 91-92, 96; and erection, 146; and masturbation, 63, 115-116, 120, 121; menstrual, 137; and orgasm, 56, 66, 175; and penetration, 121, 142, 170, 204; and pleasure, 112, 208, 235, 242-244, 247, 254; and positions, 61-62, 159, 177-178, 180; research, 62; and self-care, 24-25; and self-esteem, 17; and sex

341

toys, 215-216; and sexual response, 49, 51, 52, 61-62, 145; and yoga, 225-226; see also chronic pain

palpitations, 130

pansexual, 333

Pap smear, 31, 261

paraplegic, 116, 119

partners, 124-149; and abuse, 280; choosing, 93, 287; and coercion, 256, 272-273; cyber, 98-100; disabled, 93-94; finding, 20-21, 30, 86-90, 92-104, 248-250; and masturbation 121-122; nondisabled, xi; and oral sex, 150-151, 153, 154, 158-159, 163; people with disabilities as, 1, 4-5, 14-15, 29; and porn, 211-212; and self-esteem, 30; and STIs, 263; see also communication

passing, 22

Patanjali, 223-224

PC muscle, see pubococcygeal muscle

PCA, see personal care attendant

PCR66

pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), 261-262,263

penetration, 134-135, 137, 169-183; anal, 164, 174-176; and arthritis, 144; and catheters, 143; and cerebral palsy, 142; and cervical stimulation, 148; with dildos, 172-174; with fingers, 170-171; fisting, 171; and masturbation, 122; and oral sex, 156; and orgasm, 58; and ostomies, 143; painful, 170; with penises, 148, 173-174; with sex toys, 165; and spasticity, 140-141; and spinal cord injury, 148; vaginal, 82, 135, 141, 165, 169-174; see also positions

penis, 28, 39, 44-46, 47, 54, 59, 114, 135, 137, 143, 152, 155, 159-163, 168-169, 173-174, 201-204, 209, 214, 217, 232, 265-266, 330-332; circumcised, 45, 159-160; glans, 45-46; shaft, 45; uncircumcised, 159-160, 265

penis pumps, 173, 203-204

performance anxiety, 113, 225

perineum, 45

personal ads, 82, 97-100, 103, 249; online, 100, 249

personal care attendant (PCA), 8, 85, 104-107, 108-109, 116, 132-133, 257; and abuse, 275, 276-277; and masturbation, 116, 120-121; and partners, 17, 94-95, 104, 106; and privacy, 114; and safer sex, 265, 271; and STIs, 261; see also caregiver

pharmacology, 66-67

phone sex, 102

physical health, 256

physical therapists, 129, 192

physicians, 7, 17, 31, 39, 49, 56, 59, 65, 67-68, 73, 107-109, 115, 129, 137, 154, 169, 173-174, 188, 204, 244, 257, 263, 277

piercing, 238, 255

Planned Parenthood of Toronto, xi

pleasure, xii, 4, 23, 29, 38, 48-49, 51-52, 55-58, 62, 110-111, 112-113, 115, 116, 124, 126, 186-187, 209, 229, 235, 246, 282-283, 285

polyamory, 333

pony play, 139

pornography, 3, 111, 163, 210, 211-213; depictions of people with disabilities, 210-211; see also books; erotica; videos

positions, 85, 96, 129, 130, 140-141, 142, 143, 144, 145, 148, 151, 176-184, 205, 215; and analingus, 164; and blood pressure, 269; and cunnilingus, 158; doggie, 178; and fellatio, 160-161; and furniture, 183; and kissing, 165-166; missionary, 178; partner on top, 179-180; and pillows, 214; and sex

' toys, 216; side-by-side, 182-183; sixty-nine, 163-164; and S/M, 252-253; and wheelchairs, 180-181

post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), 49, 241-242

prazosin, 66

pregnancy, xi, 39, 127, 256, 263, 283; tubal, 259, 261

privacy, 7-8, 98, 287; and

communication, 74-75, 90, 105, 106; and fantasy, 249; and masturbation, 113, 114-115, 117, 121; and sex toys, 217-218; and sexual health, 257, 263-264; and sexual response, 64- 65

Probe, 206

progesterone, 66

propranalol, 66

propyl paraben, 206

prostate, 46-47

prosthesis, penile, 152

prostitution, see sex work

psychiatric disabilities, x, 14, 236

psychological play, 235, 247-248, 253, 255

pubic lice, 262

pubococcygeal muscle (PC), 59, 61, 66, 173, 232

quadriplegics, 16, 57, 63, 82, 111 Queen, Carol, 47, 169 queer, xi, 212, 291, 333

R

racism, 211

Ramses, 270

rashes, 209, 219, 260, 262, 270

Reality, 271

rectal cancer, 261

rectum, 47

reflexology, 134

refractory period, 57

rehab hospitals, 7

relationships, 4-5, 11, 15, 24, 71, 72, 75-84, 93-96, 131, 134, 212, 243, 264, 273, 275, 278-280, 284, 287-288; see also intimacy

respiratory system, 35

restraints, 207, 235, 245-246, 254

retrograde ejaculation, see ejaculation

rimming, see analingus

risk, 9, 30, 32, 93, 147, 164, 170, 197, 216, 220, 236, 256-257, 260-261, 263-265, 270, 276-278, 279

Royalle, Candida, 213

sadomasochism, 235

safer sex, 85, 102, 164, 170, 176, 198, 219, 220-221, 256-275

safety, 102, 133, 188, 197, 238, 241, 256, 273, 286-287

safewords, 91-92, 240-241, 250-251

scar tissue, 28-29

Scorpio Products, 271

scrotum, 44-46, 162, 174, 202, 214

selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI), 66-67

self-care, 24-25

self-esteem, 15-26

self-image, 15, 20, 21

self-monitoring, 7, 198, 220-221, 247, 251, 257-258

self-pleasuring, see masturbation

sensation, 28, 32, 37-39, 42, 126, 139-140, 147, 148, 149, 152, 166, 175, 176, 230-231, 232-233, 234, 242, 244, 246, 247, 254, 255, 257, 267-268, 287; genital, 45, 47, 143, 144, 160, 164, 169; and orgasm, 56, 57, 59, 136, 148; and sexual response, 51-53, 54; and medication, 65-67; and masturbation, 116, 117, 122; and sex toys, 188, 198-199, 202-203, 207-208, 209, 216-217, 218, 220; and touch, 134; see also hypersensitivity

sensory control, 244

sensory deprivation, 207

sensory disabilities, x

sex education, 29, 31, 64, 74, 103, 169, 175, 206, 210,

sex educators, xi-xii, 9, 33, 47, 48, 55, 111, 112, 154, 167, 169, 242, 267

343

Sex for One, 115

sex research, x, 4, 48-49, 53, 54, 55,

56, 299

sex therapist, 170

sex toy stores, 74, 112, 189, 210, 213, 218, 221-222

sex toys, 62, 74, 149, 156-157, 185-222; accessibility, 112, 114, 201; adapting, xi, 213; and allergies, 218-219, 269-272; anal, 165, 169, 176, 198-200; bondage, 207; buying, 221-222; cleaning, 195, 217-219; and fantasy, 118-119; and fatigue, 215-216; G-spot, 42; Kegel, 61; and mobility, 214-215; and motor control, 214-215; for men, 45, 47, 174, 201-204; and oral sex, 156, 165; and orgasm, 121, 189-190; for penetration, 169-170, 177; and positions, 140, 184; and safer sex, 220-221; and safety, 268-269; sensation, 207-208; S/M, 207-208, 234, 244, 254-255; see also specific toys

sex work, 48, 100-104

SexAbility, xi

sexism, 211

sexual abuse, 8-9, 115, 187, 274-289; see also sexual assault

sexual aids, 191

sexual arousal, 22, 33, 42-43, 48-54,

57, 58, 63, 111-112, 141, 146, 147, 149, 209, 210, 232, 282; and ejaculation, 232; and erection, 203; and fantasy, 131, 152; and fetishes, 139; and lubrication, 137, 170

sexual assault, 8-9, 105, 137, 274-289;

research, 276; see also sexual abuse sexual desire, 77 sexual identity, 19, 212 sexual independence, xii sexual need, 77 sexual response, 9, 28, 30, 48-68, 74,

103, 113, 138, 189, 190, 217, 229,

232, 283, 289

sexual response cycle, 49, 53; desire,

53; excitement, 53, 228; plateau,

53; orgasm, 53, 228; resolution, 53 sexual surrogates, 103 sexual vocabulary, 74 sexualhealth.com, 229 sexually transmitted disease (STD),

256, 257, 258, 263 sexually transmitted infection (STI), 170,

220, 258-263, 266-267, 270, 283 Sheiks, 270 Shiatsu, 134

shower massager, 119-120, 190 silicone, 195-198, 219, 220, 271, 272;

and lubricants, 204-205 slapping, 174, 245, 246 sling, 184 Slippery Stuff, 206 S/M, 91-92, 102, 139, 207-208, 210,

234-255; bottom, 239; community,

235-238, 243, 249-250; top, 239 soft drinks, 142 Spanish Fly, 209 spanking, 6, 242, 245, 246, 251, 252,

254-255 spasms, 34, 49-50, 52, 139, 140-142,

149, 170, 207, 214, 232, 242 spasticity, 140-141, 144, 147, 151,

178, 269 speech therapists, 71 speed, 66 spinal cord, 54 spinal cord injury (SCI), 9, 56-58, 121,

136, 141, 147-149, 229, 269, 271 spironolactone, 66 spontaneity, 3, 16, 72, 125, 126,

127-128, 131, 235-236 spronolactone, 66 Sta-hard, 209

stereotypes, 20, 70, 111,148, 236, 238 sterility, 258, 261 Stormy Leather, 201 strap-ons, 133, 172, 174, 177 stress, 127, 130, 137, 177, 232, 260,

286; and masturbation, 114, 118, 200 strip clubs, 102

stroke, 9, 125, 149 Stubbs, Kenneth Ray, 230 Stud 100, 209 stuffing, 173-174 submissive, 239 support, 32 sweat glands, 153 syphilis, 262

taboo, 4, 174, 176, 248

talk radio, 48, 72-73

Tantra, 34, 223-233, 239

Taormino, Tristan, 175

tea, 55, 142

temperature play, 122, 209, 255, 231

temporarily able-bodied (TAB), 78

Tepper, Mitch, 56-57, 229

testicles, 45-46, 57, 61, 160, 162, 259, 330

Thai beads, 199

therapists, 7, 103, 187, 282

Thomas, Paul, 213

thoracic level, 6

tickling, 122, 148-149, 190, 208, 254, 331

timing, 63, 81, 84, 85, 127, 143, 216

timolol, 66

touch, 128, 132, 133-134, 138, 139, 140, 143, 160, 167, 173, 204, 208, 217, 282, 284-285, 287; and abuse, 274-275; and caregivers, 151, 277; and communication, 77, 89, 125; and masturbation, 111, 115, 116, 120; and positions, 176, 180, 182; and sexual response, 28, 31, 37-39, 41-42, 45, 48, 50-51; and S/M, 235, 239, 244-245, 252; and timing, 127

transgender, xi, 22, 291, 333

transitioning, 334

transsexual, xi, 22, 30, 291, 333-334

transvestite, 139, 333

trauma 32, 113, 115, 132, 281-283, 286; see also post-traumatic stress disorder

trichomonas, 262-263

Trojan Supra, 270-271

trust, xi, 93, 95-96, 104, 114, 168-169, 171, 187, 204, 225, 237-238, 245, 263-264, 275, 279, 282-284

TTD, 222

TTY, 32, 222, 289

TV, 12, 72-74, 111, 177

u

Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men,

The, 1 75 Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women,

The, 174-175 urethra, 39-41, 44-46, 146, 157, 330 urethral sponge, see C-spot urination, 28, 41, 45, 55, 59, 143,

144, 258-259, 260, 263, 266 urologists, 174 uterus, 42-43

vagina, 39-43, 54, 57, 59-61, 119, 130, 135, 136-137, 143, 145; lubrication, 137, 145, 148, 152, 169-170, 171, 209, 220, 283; see also penetration

vaginismus, 170

Vedas, 223

ventilator, 34

vestibular glands, 41

vibrators, 119, 122, 147, 187, 192-196, 201, 202, 217, 221,269; "addiction" to, 188; and allergies, 218; assistance with, 105, 116; battery-powered, 194-196, 218; butterfly, 144; cleaning, 105; coil, 194, 218; egg, 119; electric, 192-194, 218; and fatigue, 216; insertable, 42; and motor control, 148, 214; and oral sex, 155, 165; and orgasm, 146, 189-190; and plastic, 195; and positions, 177; and privacy, 217-218; rubber, 195; silicone, 195, 271; wand, 194; waterproof, 214, 218

345

videos, pom, 116, 211-213, 221, 222;

fetish, 139 Viniyoga, 224-225 viruses, 258, 259-261, 264, 283 visual impairment, 125 voyeurs, 139 vulva, 39-40

w

wax, 253, 255

Waxman, Barbara Faye, ix

wheelchairs, 6, 8, 18, 24, 28, 92, 101, 118, 128, 131, 180-181, 201, 211, 250-251; and accessibility, 237; and Night Rider harness, 201; and porn, 211; and positions, 148, 161, 166, 181; and public sex, 130

Whipple, Beverley, 48, 136, 229 whips, 208, 216, 217, 220, 235, 243,

245, 246-247, 254 World Wide Web, 98; see also Internet

Y

Yahoo, 99

yeast infections, 146, 206, 220, 258

yoga, 223-226

Yoga Sutras, 223-224

THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO CUNNILINGUS

HOW TO GO DOWN ON A WOMAN AND GIVER HER EXQUISITE PLEASURE